'Best Come Back Line Ever (Full Version)

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tiggerspoohbear -> 'Best Come Back Line Ever (10/28/2010 11:52:56 AM)


Police work must be entertaining as well as dangerous.

In summary, the police arrested Patrick Lawrence, 22 year old white male, in a pumpkin patch 00.01 a.m. on Friday.

On Monday, at the Gwinnett County (GA) courthouse, Lawrence was charged with lewd and lascivious behavior, public indecency, and public intoxication. The suspect explained that as he was passing a pumpkin patch on his way home from a drinking session when he decided to stop, 'You know how a pumpkin is soft and squishy inside, and there was no one around for miles or at least I thought there wasn't anyone around' he stated in a telephone interview.

Lawrence went on to say that he pulled over to the side of the road, picked out a pumpkin that he felt was appropriate to his purpose, cut a hole in it, and proceeded to satisfy his alleged need. 'Guess I was really into it, you know?' he commented with evident embarrassment.

In the process of doing the deed, Lawrence failed to notice an approaching police car and was unaware of his audience until Officer Brenda Taylor approached him. 'It was an unusual situation, that's for sure,' said Officer Taylor. 'I walked up to Lawrence and he's just banging away at this pumpkin.' Officer Taylor went on to describe what happened when she approached Lawrence .

'I said, 'Excuse me sir, but do you realize that you're having sex with a pumpkin?'

He froze and was clearly very surprised that I was there, and then he looked me straight in the face and said...

'A pumpkin? Shit....is it midnight already?'

This was in the Washington Post...the title of the article was .''Best Come Back Line Ever





SorceressJ -> RE: 'Best Come Back Line Ever (10/28/2010 2:01:57 PM)

*Holy ROTFLMFAO, Batpooh..* [sm=rofl.gif]




RapierFugue -> RE: 'Best Come Back Line Ever (10/28/2010 2:04:55 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: tiggerspoohbear

This was in the Washington Post



No, it wasn't.

http://www.snopes.com/risque/caught/pumpkin.asp





tiggerspoohbear -> RE: 'Best Come Back Line Ever (10/28/2010 3:13:53 PM)

I just quoted what was written in the email I received from a friend. Didn't verify the source, but either way, it's a pretty funny story, true or not. Although I can see a drunk guy doing that. [;)]




RapierFugue -> RE: 'Best Come Back Line Ever (10/28/2010 3:22:39 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: tiggerspoohbear

but either way, it's a pretty funny story, true or not.


It takes all sorts to make a world.




poise -> RE: 'Best Come Back Line Ever (10/28/2010 3:47:26 PM)

Pumpkin pie...........it's not just dessert anymore.[8D]




samboct -> RE: 'Best Come Back Line Ever (10/28/2010 4:38:21 PM)

Roasted pumpkin seeds anyone?




SorceressJ -> RE: 'Best Come Back Line Ever (10/28/2010 4:47:47 PM)

This dude's favorite cartoon when he was a little kid:

[image]local://upfiles/1044097/4093AAFAEF7E401286C8A72A512EC1FA.jpg[/image]




tiggerspoohbear -> RE: 'Best Come Back Line Ever (10/28/2010 8:23:02 PM)

Awwww, can't wait for that to be on, unless of course I've missed it already! I needs me some Charlie Brown cartoons during the holidays, o yes I do.




SorceressJ -> RE: 'Best Come Back Line Ever (10/28/2010 9:03:32 PM)

Oh yes, and don't forget, Frosty and Rudolph and them are on the way, also .. *YAY* [:D]




tiggerspoohbear -> RE: 'Best Come Back Line Ever (10/29/2010 5:58:17 AM)

I know, can't miss any of them, or the old Christmas movies, the season will soon be upon us! [sm=cheering.gif]




MMsCandy -> RE: 'Best Come Back Line Ever (10/29/2010 7:23:43 AM)

LMAO!

Ok i usually DO roast pumpkin seeds every year - i think i am going to pass on them this year LOL. We are carving our pumpkin tonight because we won't be home for halloween, i  just know i am not going to get this image out of my head.




GreedyTop -> RE: 'Best Come Back Line Ever (10/29/2010 7:27:27 AM)

CANDYKINS!!

ETA:  just spoke briefly to OTOOB.. she gonna call me back....




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