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Abnormally high level of sexual frustration - 11/2/2010 11:34:42 AM

MissAsylum

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Joined: 1/9/2009
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So, due to extremely conflicted schedules, my boyfriend and I have not had any real sex for about a month. We had a quickie on Sunday, and while we both reached orgasm, it is mutually agreed upon that it left us worse for wear. It feels like I haven't had sex for a few months.

I'm in a state of constant arousal when I'm not even thinking about it. It's becoming a distraction and it won't subside.

I've tried adding an extra hour to my workouts, trying to bury my head in work, and i've been masturbating profusely....nothing.

I can't have sex right now since my boyfriend left on business for 2 weeks, and I feel like i'll go crazy before he gets back.

Has this happened to anybody before?

If so, do you have any suggestion that could possibly help?

< Message edited by MissAsylum -- 11/2/2010 11:36:38 AM >

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RE: Abnormally high level of sexual frustration - 11/2/2010 12:10:58 PM

switch2please

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I'm usually very multiorgasmic and pretty easy to get off, but sometimes I have trouble reaching orgasm. I'll be right on the edge and it just won't happen. It's incredibly frustrating, more so for me than not having sex at all.
If I'm busy with something I'm interested in, I usually don't have time to think about sex. If I want to relax and come, I'll take a hot steamy shower with my favorite vibrator. If I'm feeling especially frisky I'll leave the curtains open. There's virtually no chance that someone could see me through that window - the logistics would take a very dedicated athletic perv, lol - but the thought of the possibility turns me on. If clitoral stimulation isn't enough, there are some decent dildos available...though a phallus doesn't do much for me unless it's attached to someone. If I have a couple hours to spare I will bring out the lube and erotica and fist myself, which always brings very intense orgasms. I do prefer sex to masturbation but I can do just fine on my own

Does this help at all?

(in reply to MissAsylum)

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RE: Abnormally high level of sexual frustration - 11/2/2010 12:13:25 PM

MissAsylum

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i wish...however i tried all that.

i thought romancing myself would help, but to no avail.

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RE: Abnormally high level of sexual frustration - 11/2/2010 12:17:56 PM

81song

Posts: 293
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I do have my days... and I do not know why but at times cumming two or three is not enough. And then I am still horny. I am not saying it happens a lot but when it does happen yes it can be frustrating.

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Post #: 4

RE: Abnormally high level of sexual frustration - 11/2/2010 1:27:06 PM

lizi

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Joined: 2/1/2009
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I hear you. My partner and I have dry spells once in a while due to extenuating circumstances and they drive me crazy. For me masturbation doesn't really do it. I do masturbate but it isn't a substitute for sex with my man.

I have found that talking about sex with him during the time we're apart and kind of teasing each other helps the utter feeling of frustration. Maybe it's knowing that he wants me too. Or masturbating with him on cam helps. It's the contact with him that I'm craving, if I can't have it in a physical way I can still access the sexual side of our relationship with him by talking or watching.

If we can somehow share our feelings or our actions in that area it helps alleviate things to a certain degree for me. I like leaving a provocative note for him on the computer and then having him write me back later that he was so hard after reading it that he couldn't get up from his desk right then. It's just kind of nice sharing my frustration with him, it seems to give me some release to be able to share the feelings if not the act.

(in reply to MissAsylum)

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RE: Abnormally high level of sexual frustration - 11/2/2010 1:56:46 PM

AquaticSub

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Since I pretty much can not achieve orgasm on my own - always been that way, I've orgasmed a handful of times on my own - I find that not masturbating helps or to simply not masturbate as intensely. Just get to a nice little buzz and let it fade away. But then I've been pretty much living with high arousal without the ability to get off just about my whole life so I'm kinda used to a frustrated state. It's just my normal state, lol. But I find that the less I actively try to get off and the more I just relax and enjoy the buzz of arousal... the happier I am with it.

< Message edited by AquaticSub -- 11/2/2010 1:57:17 PM >

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RE: Abnormally high level of sexual frustration - 11/2/2010 2:56:53 PM

hlen5

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MissAsylum

.......i thought romancing myself would help, but to no avail.

I love this turn of phrase!

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RE: Abnormally high level of sexual frustration - 11/2/2010 3:03:04 PM

Kaliko

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Ah...well, I go 2-3 months without seeing my love, so when it gets really bad, I find that a glass of wine and digging down deep to write him something erotic...no...more than erotic- downright disturbing....really helps. It surprises and amazes him that I can come up with some of this stuff, we have new ideas for next time we meet, and somehow, revealing a new level of that ever deepening twistedness tempers the urge a bit. It's a touch embarrassing for me, which allows me the opportunity to push beyond my mental "limits" a bit, which is something I love to do. So maybe that satisfies me in a way, as well...that if he's not here to push me, I push myself. (In other ways too, but talkin' about sex, here.)

Oh, plus a really good vibrator helps, too. But that's kind of a given.

(in reply to MissAsylum)

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RE: Abnormally high level of sexual frustration - 11/2/2010 3:07:07 PM

poise

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With all due respect...have you given some thought to bottoming for someone
during a casual play session? If you aren't able to please yourself regardless of
all your efforts, and your last encounter with the boyfriend was mediocre at best
perhaps this calls for extreme measures.

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RE: Abnormally high level of sexual frustration - 11/2/2010 3:38:09 PM

littlewonder

Posts: 15659
Status: offline

I wish I had this problem. I have just the opposite. I find that my libido has always been pretty much on the low side unless He turns me on in some way and even then it does subside when I get too busy with life.

Maybe get a hobby?

(in reply to poise)

Post #: 10

RE: Abnormally high level of sexual frustration - 11/2/2010 5:08:32 PM

MissAsylum

Posts: 1863
Joined: 1/9/2009
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quote:

ORIGINAL: poise

With all due respect...have you given some thought to bottoming for someone
during a casual play session? If you aren't able to please yourself regardless of
all your efforts, and your last encounter with the boyfriend was mediocre at best
perhaps this calls for extreme measures.

Being a bottom makes me ill....no idea why, but it disturbs me to point where I have had an anxiety attack, or wanted to vomit. Just not my thing.

My problem when I am by myself is that I can reach orgasm(that has never been a problem with me), but its not satisfying. I get the slight(and I use this word generously) head rush and I'm throbbing and the rest of all that good stuff that are signs of orgasm, but its just not enough.

I typically have amazing sex with my boyfriend, but with a quickie, there is a lack of foreplay involved, its not as intimate...due to most of the time its just our pants around our ankles...and its rushed.

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

I wish I had this problem. I have just the opposite. I find that my libido has always been pretty much on the low side unless He turns me on in some way and even then it does subside when I get too busy with life.

Maybe get a hobby?

I have hobbies...I work constantly...i'm rarely giving thought to having sex when i'm occupied with doing something else.
But the physical side of it is another story. It feels like I about a minute away from orgasm for hours on end, but nothing is really causing it.

_____________________________

I hate when I'm wearing my apple bottom jeans, but i can't find my boots with the fur.

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Post #: 11

RE: Abnormally high level of sexual frustration - 11/2/2010 8:31:08 PM

CalifChick

Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MissAsylum

Has this happened to anybody before?

No, never, you're the first person EVER.

quote:

If so, do you have any suggestion that could possibly help?

Umm... get a grip? You're an adult, right? There will be times in your life when you don't get to jump and hump whenever you feel like it. Let us know when you start counting the time between in months or years instead of in days or weeks.

Cali

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(in reply to MissAsylum)

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RE: Abnormally high level of sexual frustration - 11/2/2010 9:56:57 PM

wandersalone

Posts: 4666
Joined: 11/21/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: CalifChick

quote:

ORIGINAL: MissAsylum

Has this happened to anybody before?

No, never, you're the first person EVER.

quote:

If so, do you have any suggestion that could possibly help?

Umm... get a grip? You're an adult, right? There will be times in your life when you don't get to jump and hump whenever you feel like it. Let us know when you start counting the time between in months or years instead of in days or weeks.

Cali

um Cali are you ok? I don't think that the OP was catastrophising this as the most awful thing that has ever happened to her and having a pity party but more was simply asking how do others deal with this.

I am not sure how telling people to get a grip and to act like an adult can be helpful in all situations

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RE: Abnormally high level of sexual frustration - 11/3/2010 9:17:30 AM

pahunkboy

Posts: 33061
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From: Central Pennsylvania
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Practice makes perfect?

(in reply to wandersalone)

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RE: Abnormally high level of sexual frustration - 11/3/2010 9:53:57 AM

MissAsylum

Posts: 1863
Joined: 1/9/2009
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i'll get carpel tunnel lol

_____________________________

I hate when I'm wearing my apple bottom jeans, but i can't find my boots with the fur.

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Post #: 15

RE: Abnormally high level of sexual frustration - 11/3/2010 11:23:14 AM

Toppingfrmbottom

Posts: 6528
Joined: 6/7/2009
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You could have a disorder called Pegad, it's something along the line of persistent sexual arousal disorder, I probably have the name wrong though I do know the abbreviation is PGAD., and it's where they're horny all the time, and it's not even around anything sexually arousing, it just is. Like driving or doing the laundry or vacuuming, and then they need to masturbate to relieve the pressure, but that only works for a few minutes an then the arousal is back, There's just no relief from the arousal.

quote:

ORIGINAL: MissAsylum

My problem when I am by myself is that I can reach orgasm(that has never been a problem with me), but its not satisfying. I get the slight(and I use this word generously) head rush and I'm throbbing and the rest of all that good stuff that are signs of orgasm, but its just not enough.

I typically have amazing sex with my boyfriend, but with a quickie, there is a lack of foreplay involved, its not as intimate...due to most of the time its just our pants around our ankles...and its rushed.

I have hobbies...I work constantly...i'm rarely giving thought to having sex when i'm occupied with doing something else.
But the physical side of it is another story. It feels like I about a minute away from orgasm for hours on end, but nothing is really causing it.

< Message edited by Toppingfrmbottom -- 11/3/2010 11:26:48 AM >

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RE: Abnormally high level of sexual frustration - 11/3/2010 11:39:18 AM

AquaticSub

Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Toppingfrmbottom

You could have a disorder called Pegad, it's something along the line of persistent sexual arousal disorder, I probably have the name wrong though I do know the abbreviation is PGAD., and it's where they're horny all the time, and it's not even around anything sexually arousing, it just is. Like driving or doing the laundry or vacuuming, and then they need to masturbate to relieve the pressure, but that only works for a few minutes an then the arousal is back, There's just no relief from the arousal.

Huh... wonder if I should get that checked out sometime... Thanks for the info!

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to Toppingfrmbottom)

Post #: 17

RE: Abnormally high level of sexual frustration - 11/3/2010 11:50:57 AM

Toppingfrmbottom

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You're welcome. Unfortunatly there really isn't any known help for PEGAD yet, and some dr's are skeptical about things like that, but there's support groups and stuff online if you do find this disorder fits you..

quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub

Huh... wonder if I should get that checked out sometime... Thanks for the info!

_____________________________

One world under lube with vibrators and dildo's for all! quote from the sex toy 101 book

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Post #: 18

RE: Abnormally high level of sexual frustration - 11/3/2010 12:37:40 PM

MissAsylum

Posts: 1863
Joined: 1/9/2009
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i will really look in to this and speak to my doctor about this. thank you so much.

_____________________________

I hate when I'm wearing my apple bottom jeans, but i can't find my boots with the fur.

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Post #: 19

RE: Abnormally high level of sexual frustration - 11/3/2010 2:46:09 PM

AquaticSub

Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Toppingfrmbottom

You're welcome. Unfortunatly there really isn't any known help for PEGAD yet, and some dr's are skeptical about things like that, but there's support groups and stuff online if you do find this disorder fits you..

That's what I figured. I mentioned it to a therapist once and she said that there really isn't thing to be done about 'sex on the brain'.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to Toppingfrmbottom)

Post #: 20

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