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RE: Good News/Bad News - 6/5/2006 12:31:58 PM   
Wolf1020


Posts: 447
Joined: 11/7/2005
From: Anderson, SC
Status: offline
quote:

The bad news is some guests are kosher vegans while others are virgin nuns.

The good news is they all get drunk and have a party

The bad news is the wrath of god is upon you for supply the mixed drinks

_____________________________

"The less people know about how sausages and laws are made, the better they'll sleep at night."~ Otto von Bismarck

"Fish and visitors smell in three days"~Benjamin Franklin

(in reply to Fawne)
Profile   Post #: 361
RE: Good News/Bad News - 6/5/2006 12:50:05 PM   
Gauge


Posts: 5689
Joined: 6/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

The bad news is the wrath of god is upon you for supply the mixed drinks


The good news is that you don't believe in God.


The good news is that I have, once again, turned this thread back to the way it should be.

_____________________________

"For there is no folly of the beast of the earth which is not infinitely outdone by the madness of men." Herman Melville - Moby Dick

I'm wearing my chicken suit and humming La Marseillaise.

(in reply to Wolf1020)
Profile   Post #: 362
RE: Good News/Bad News - 6/5/2006 3:27:20 PM   
Petruchio


Posts: 1615
Joined: 2/6/2005
Status: offline
quote:

The good news is that I have, once again, turned this thread back to the way it should be.

The bad news is that it's now in the hands of a hijacker.

The good news is that Gauge is still on the job!

(in reply to Gauge)
Profile   Post #: 363
RE: Good News/Bad News - 6/5/2006 4:22:30 PM   
Gauge


Posts: 5689
Joined: 6/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

The good news is that Gauge is still on the job!


The bad news is that I will only be here for a limited time so order now!


The good news is that you have been offered your dream job.

_____________________________

"For there is no folly of the beast of the earth which is not infinitely outdone by the madness of men." Herman Melville - Moby Dick

I'm wearing my chicken suit and humming La Marseillaise.

(in reply to Petruchio)
Profile   Post #: 364
RE: Good News/Bad News - 6/6/2006 11:16:10 AM   
Vendaval


Posts: 10297
Joined: 1/15/2005
Status: offline 		The bad news is that you are locked into a 5 year contract with your
current employer and the anticipated lawyer and court fees to break
the contract would bankrupt you.
 
The good news is that your new boss is friendly, positive,
organized and reliable.
 
Vendaval


quote:

ORIGINAL: Gauge
The good news is that you have been offered your dream job.


_____________________________

"Beware, the woods at night, beware the lunar light.
So in this gray haze we'll be meating again, and on that
great day, I will tease you all the same."
"WOLF MOON", OCTOBER RUST, TYPE O NEGATIVE


http://KinkMeet.co.uk

(in reply to Gauge)
Profile   Post #: 365
RE: Good News/Bad News - 6/6/2006 11:42:33 AM   
Petruchio


Posts: 1615
Joined: 2/6/2005
Status: offline
quote:

The good news is that your new boss is friendly, positive,
organized and reliable.

The bad news is that he's in prison.

The good news is that you're allowed conjugal visits.

(in reply to Vendaval)
Profile   Post #: 366
RE: Good News/Bad News - 6/6/2006 7:04:38 PM   
Gauge


Posts: 5689
Joined: 6/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

The good news is that you're allowed conjugal visits.


The bad news is he wants "Jethro" the 6' 10" 350 pound hillbilly with the 17" cock to join you both.

The good news is that your car got stolen and you can't make it to the prison.

_____________________________

"For there is no folly of the beast of the earth which is not infinitely outdone by the madness of men." Herman Melville - Moby Dick

I'm wearing my chicken suit and humming La Marseillaise.

(in reply to Petruchio)
Profile   Post #: 367
RE: Good News/Bad News - 6/6/2006 10:14:16 PM   
Vendaval


Posts: 10297
Joined: 1/15/2005
Status: offline 		The bad news is that his new homies in the house are aware of the situation and sending over a driver in an a hot car to pick you up.

The good news is that there is also a bodyguard inside the car.
Hey, they do supply personalized services.

Vendaval 

quote:

ORIGINAL: Gauge
The good news is that your car got stolen and you can't make it to the prison.


_____________________________

"Beware, the woods at night, beware the lunar light.
So in this gray haze we'll be meating again, and on that
great day, I will tease you all the same."
"WOLF MOON", OCTOBER RUST, TYPE O NEGATIVE


http://KinkMeet.co.uk

(in reply to Gauge)
Profile   Post #: 368
RE: Good News/Bad News - 6/7/2006 9:53:20 AM   
Petruchio


Posts: 1615
Joined: 2/6/2005
Status: offline
quote:

The good news is that there is also a bodyguard inside the car.
Hey, they do supply personalized services.

The bad news is that their bodyguard is Jethro.

The good news is that Jethro just took an HIV test.

(in reply to Vendaval)
Profile   Post #: 369
RE: Good News/Bad News - 6/7/2006 10:52:02 AM   
Gauge


Posts: 5689
Joined: 6/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

The good news is that Jethro just took an HIV test.


The bad news is he didn't study for it.


The good news is Jethro can spell HIV.

_____________________________

"For there is no folly of the beast of the earth which is not infinitely outdone by the madness of men." Herman Melville - Moby Dick

I'm wearing my chicken suit and humming La Marseillaise.

(in reply to Petruchio)
Profile   Post #: 370
RE: Good News/Bad News - 6/7/2006 2:00:52 PM   
Dustyn


Posts: 1044
Joined: 4/5/2006
Status: offline 		the bad news is after a few hours in the backseat of his Yugo, you get to study up for the test now.

the good news is the nurse gave you Cliff Notes.


_____________________________

Mother is the name for God on the lips and hearts of all children.

Murderer?! Murderer! Let me tell you something about murder. It's fun; it's easy; you gonna learn ALL about it. - Tin Tin

Can you be more amusing?

(in reply to Gauge)
Profile   Post #: 371
RE: Good News/Bad News - 6/7/2006 2:30:04 PM   
Gauge


Posts: 5689
Joined: 6/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

the good news is the nurse gave you Cliff Notes.


The bad news is that Cliff Notes is bigger than Jethro and they make you into a love sandwich.


The good news is that your naughty bits are numb and you can't feel a thing as his monster cock is unleashed on your ass.

_____________________________

"For there is no folly of the beast of the earth which is not infinitely outdone by the madness of men." Herman Melville - Moby Dick

I'm wearing my chicken suit and humming La Marseillaise.

(in reply to Dustyn)
Profile   Post #: 372
RE: Good News/Bad News - 6/7/2006 3:12:20 PM   
Dustyn


Posts: 1044
Joined: 4/5/2006
Status: offline 		The bad thing is there is STILL a monster cock in your ass...

The good thing is your employer has great medical coverage


_____________________________

Mother is the name for God on the lips and hearts of all children.

Murderer?! Murderer! Let me tell you something about murder. It's fun; it's easy; you gonna learn ALL about it. - Tin Tin

Can you be more amusing?

(in reply to Gauge)
Profile   Post #: 373
RE: Good News/Bad News - 6/7/2006 4:06:22 PM   
Gauge


Posts: 5689
Joined: 6/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

The good thing is your employer has great medical coverage


The bad news is that you only work part time and don't have medical coverage.


The good news is that the hospital is required to treat you.

_____________________________

"For there is no folly of the beast of the earth which is not infinitely outdone by the madness of men." Herman Melville - Moby Dick

I'm wearing my chicken suit and humming La Marseillaise.

(in reply to Dustyn)
Profile   Post #: 374
RE: Good News/Bad News - 6/7/2006 7:33:03 PM   
akisha


Posts: 2071
Joined: 6/25/2005
Status: offline 		Bad news is that the Doctors and nurses are laffing so hard they can't help you and keep brining over more personnel to show them your ass.

Good news is you can now sue for emotional distress.

_____________________________

I'm confused.... No wait!!! Maybe I'm not

It's not a blonde moment! It's momentary peroxide posioning. ;)

Your pain makes me smile ~ Happy Bunny

532-095-649

(in reply to Gauge)
Profile   Post #: 375
RE: Good News/Bad News - 6/7/2006 7:40:02 PM   
Vendaval


Posts: 10297
Joined: 1/15/2005
Status: offline 		Bad news is that the story made the local media and the judge has
agreed to allow cameras inside the courtroom.
 
The good news is that Star magazine has offered you a substantial
amount of money for exclusive rights to your story.
 
Vendaval

quote:

ORIGINAL: akisha
Good news is you can now sue for emotional distress.


_____________________________

"Beware, the woods at night, beware the lunar light.
So in this gray haze we'll be meating again, and on that
great day, I will tease you all the same."
"WOLF MOON", OCTOBER RUST, TYPE O NEGATIVE


http://KinkMeet.co.uk

(in reply to akisha)
Profile   Post #: 376
RE: Good News/Bad News - 6/7/2006 7:47:47 PM   
MistressOfGa


Posts: 2929
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: michaelGA2

Bad News: You have to provide the Plasma

Good News: You'll never have to worry about losing weight or growing older.

Bad News:


Michael, this is some funny shit here! Love the Matel answer too. Laughed out loud on it. Bravo!

Yes, I am a little late on this thread <g>

_____________________________





(in reply to michaelGA2)
Profile   Post #: 377
RE: Good News/Bad News - 6/8/2006 6:20:26 PM   
Dustyn


Posts: 1044
Joined: 4/5/2006
Status: offline 		The bad news is that they are offering it in Lira.

The good news is you start aquiring a fan base, thanks to the Star.


_____________________________

Mother is the name for God on the lips and hearts of all children.

Murderer?! Murderer! Let me tell you something about murder. It's fun; it's easy; you gonna learn ALL about it. - Tin Tin

Can you be more amusing?

(in reply to MistressOfGa)
Profile   Post #: 378
RE: Good News/Bad News - 6/8/2006 9:30:20 PM   
Gauge


Posts: 5689
Joined: 6/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

The good news is you start aquiring a fan base, thanks to the Star.


The bad news is that you have aquired a stalker fan as well. His name is Edmund and he is from Iowa. He has a ranch there and a few chickens. You keep finding feathers in your bed signed from Edmund.

The good news is that Edmund is kind of cute.

_____________________________

"For there is no folly of the beast of the earth which is not infinitely outdone by the madness of men." Herman Melville - Moby Dick

I'm wearing my chicken suit and humming La Marseillaise.

(in reply to Dustyn)
Profile   Post #: 379
RE: Good News/Bad News - 6/8/2006 11:20:13 PM   
Vendaval


Posts: 10297
Joined: 1/15/2005
Status: offline 		The bad news is that he is as dumb as a fence post.
 
The good news is that stocks in chicken feathers are rising.
 
Vendaval

quote:

ORIGINAL: Gauge
The good news is that Edmund is kind of cute.


_____________________________

"Beware, the woods at night, beware the lunar light.
So in this gray haze we'll be meating again, and on that
great day, I will tease you all the same."
"WOLF MOON", OCTOBER RUST, TYPE O NEGATIVE


http://KinkMeet.co.uk

(in reply to Gauge)
Profile   Post #: 380
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