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RE: What makes a man a man? - 12/26/2010 3:40:09 PM   
SlaveOwnerDave


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quote:

ORIGINAL: hausboy
Most men wouldn't survive a month as a woman.... it's really so much harder.


I must really be a Man, then, 'cause I certainly could not survive as a woman! I already know this, and do not look down on women.

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RE: What makes a man a man? - 12/26/2010 5:49:51 PM   
TreasureKY


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quote:

ORIGINAL: defiantbadgirl


quote:

ORIGINAL: SAMHAIN09

I'm curious what do you feel makes a man a man?


I consider someone a real man who has the following characteristics:

1. Honest

2. Reliable

3. Protective

4. Has a conscience

5. Self sufficient

6. Understanding

7. Doesn't expect perfection

8. Has never non-consentually physically abused a woman



I'm hoping these are just characteristics added to gender... otherwise this defines me as a man! 

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RE: What makes a man a man? - 12/26/2010 8:23:17 PM   
roland23


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Is this the 21st century? I grew up in a community where manliness and masculinity where equated with money, cars, violence and lots of women(1970s suburbia)

When I look into the full length mirror each morning I know I am a man.

My birth certificate reassures me.

If I am still worried about it, I put on my armor and gallop away on my white stallion to slay a dragon.

Is the original posting serious?

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RE: What makes a man a man? - 12/26/2010 8:41:52 PM   
MaxsGirl


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A penis.

Anything else (honesty, reliability, yada yada) can and should apply to both men and women.  To say otherwise implies that women are less than men.

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RE: What makes a man a man? - 12/26/2010 9:04:59 PM   
InvisibleBlack


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-FR-

I said this in reply to a similar post quite some time ago, but I'll repeat it for its intrinsic value:


There is only one role model to demonstrate what it means to be a man...

"Gomez Addams

I learned a lot of things from The Addams Family, and some of the most important involved how to be a man and how to treat a lady. Gomez was the consummate gentleman. Unfailingly polite, never less than courteous, he carried himself proudly and spoke his mind. He kept himself fit, he was always impeccably dressed, and he loved his family with a frightening intensity. Sure, there was the occasional hint of prior atrocities, but what fascinating man doesn’t have a few minor peccadilloes in his mysterious past?

He had an adoring wife, a loving family, and never stooped to being petty, mean or cruel. He took advantage of no one. Never attempted to lie, cheat, steal or deceive. Gomez only became visibly angry when those he loved were endangered and he was fierce in the defense of his family and loved ones. He was confident in his mannerisms and comfortable in his lifestyle and pursuits. He was accepting of others and entirely non-judgemental...

This attitude extends itself towards a general acceptance to pretty much everything. You could never imagine any member of the Addams Family being prejudiced against anyone just because of their color, gender, religious preference, sexual orientation or the current state of their mortality. They accepted anyone that walked in their door, no matter how bizarre or mundane, with delight and glee. And The Addams Family was my first taste of gender equality; not only was Morticia a fully equal part of the household, but she was a better fencer."


What more could you ask for?

“Never go to bed angry, or on fire.”
- Gomez Addams




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RE: What makes a man a man? - 12/26/2010 9:29:06 PM   
hausboy


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quote:

ORIGINAL: MaxsGirl

A penis.

Anything else (honesty, reliability, yada yada) can and should apply to both men and women.  To say otherwise implies that women are less than men.


oh bullocks.
I wasn't born with one--and I am definitely a man.  I look like one, think like one, sound like one, smell like one, act like one, fuck like one.  I fully appreciate and embrace my history living as a woman--it ultimately made me into a better man--but a penis doesn't make someone a man.  Neither does that y chromosome. It's the brain and the chemicals that make a man.

The majority of people in my life have no concept that I ever lived as anyone other than a man--I work in a healthcare environment where we have 1 male doctor, 1 male nurse, and just a handful of other men--all of the nurses,  MD's and staff are all women.  I can't tell you how many times I hear the phrase "well, you wouldn't understand. You're a man."  (if they only knew!) 

Because of my condition, I've met biological men who have microphallus, men who lost their genitals in accidents and men who lost "parts" to cancer.  All of them devastated, because they believed that without a scrotum and penis, they had no worth as men.

So it saddens me....and kinda pisses me off a bit....when I hear people exrpess those sentiments.

Because, quite frankly, it's a load of horse hockey.

A penis doesn't make a  man, any more so than the ability to reproduce makes someone a woman.

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RE: What makes a man a man? - 12/26/2010 9:49:47 PM   
jujubeeMB


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I basically think that if you feel you are a man, you're a man. Regardless of genitalia, honesty, courage, ability to lift heavy things or poetry

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RE: What makes a man a man? - 12/26/2010 11:00:37 PM   
Elisabella


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I might be old-fashioned but I think someone has to actually be male to be a man.

Just one of those things.

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RE: What makes a man a man? - 12/27/2010 1:37:47 AM   
DMFParadox


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What a fluffy bunny contest! The ladies posting towards the end excluded. I'm so sorry I was late to the self-emasculation guys!

Men have cocks and are obliged to use them on women. And be as successful as possible, rated in terms of 'stuff' and 'respeck'. Secondary imperatives are making sure their relatives with and without cocks are reasonably successful. This means:
-Never appear weak, except when you must.
-Spread the love, except when the opportunity cost is too high.
-Never get caught lying, but be a damned fucking good liar.
-Be courageous, except when it's stupid.
-Don't take shit from anyone, except when you must.
-Give shit to everyone, and see if they'll take it.
-Don't get caught either giving or receiving too much shit. But it's better to be caught giving than receiving.
-Unless it's really illegal, and sometimes even then.
-If you kill one dude, you're a murdering bastard. If you kill 10,000, then we're just gonna be over here, you can have all our stuff.
-Take care of your own; burn and pillage the rest.
-Don't get caught burning and pillaging when you're not strong enough to carry through.
-Unless you're really good at bluffing. See: lying.
-After achieving as much burning and pillaging as you can, veto all further actions of that morally repugnant behavior.
-After all, you don't want it coming back around.
-Claim that your ground is the high ground. Maintain this claim in the face of all opposition. And facts; rewrite those.
-Be a team player; it's good publicity, and you'll have a team. You can do a lot more pillaging that way.
-But be 'unique'. You are a special snowflake, by damn, and your particular nonsense hobby is the most important that exists.
-And finally:
-Win. Don't you dare seem weak or inept, because all and sundry will fucking steamroll you. Enjoy your cock, brother.



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RE: What makes a man a man? - 12/27/2010 2:16:03 AM   
sunshinemiss


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"Last night, you were like some desperate howling demon... do it again."


Raul Julia... purrrrrrrrrrrr....

Seriously - (ok, Raul Julia was absolutely purrifiable)...
I love when we learn things from the oddest sources.

I remember realizing that the cat Pepe Le Peu was basically going to be guilty of date rape if he got that cat. I mean I sat up in my seat in the theater and was shocked!

Gomez Addams - not a bad choice. Every good girl needs a man with a bit of bad boy in him!

Reminds me of the old Star Trek episode where Kirk was split into "good" Kirk and "bad" Kirk. The good one couldn't make any decisions and was useless. The bad one was willing to take the risk.

Some ramblings from my brain, such as they are.

best,
sunshine

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RE: What makes a man a man? - 12/27/2010 4:42:34 AM   
RedBottomGirl26


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Invisible black, interesting comparison defined in one single character (a bit limiting, yet your taste is impeccible). I'd probably have to throw most of the character's Vincent Price, or Rutger Hauger has done in with that list, save a few small exceptions. Even in their villain roles there was always something rather mannerly that belied the villain, unusual since most modern villains resembled nothing of the sort, and instead we get rude and crude obnoxious villains for the better part of 10 yrs it seems; most of the good ones died out in the 80's, though every now & then someone comes out with a rare gem, but it's not often.

Anyway, your response was very thought-provoking (unusual on this site half the time), yet I also much humor in sunshinemiss's response as well...haha, yes I agree there as well, and it really amused me that you tied that all back to star trek somehow, hmm, I agree the mirror universes saw much mayhem and humor.

As far, as the gender question...I suppose I should address that a little since the topic is what makes a man a man. Though, I feel that is not a clear question. It makes sense, it's just...my question is what is the real reason for asking it? I mean, to every question is a reason why we ask, I do find it hard to believe it was a random question. I guess that is the curious side of me wanting to know.

Hausboy, I have read some literature on the issues you are facing, but you are right in that most people never really have to question their gender (or if they do it's subconscious). Most people know & think of me in the female way, however at times perhaps I do appear a big androgenous, I can have this sweet & innocent look one minute, or a tough as nails, or rather annoyed masculine growl or stare. I think physical features are to me the last thing on the list though, of what makes a man a man, or a woman a woman. Like many others I believe it is an attitude or state of mind/spirit, though perhaps there are a few physical traits more associated with men than women (pure physical strength being one of them, women are usually attributed to being more emotional, and sadly though a stereotype in some ways, those are usually true in some form).

Little wonder, hehe, I am slowly changing my opinion about you...the fact that you quoted Hellboy as a reference to "manhood" was totally hillarious, why didn't I think of that? I recognized the passage right away though, & to me that was a fairly good definition of a man, in the movie. But really, you could say the same thing about a woman, that how one chooses to finish is in some ways more important than the start of a journey...it is in human-kind's nature.

Strangely enough, what can start out as a small topic, often seems to product mixed and varied results. All of us come from different walks of life, but most of us, do seem to vere in similar thought-processes, thus proving that to intelligence and manners there is no gender of the spirit.

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RE: What makes a man a man? - 12/27/2010 5:47:12 AM   
LadyConstanze


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Joined: 2/18/2005
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quote:

A penis doesn't make a man, any more so than the ability to reproduce makes someone a woman.


Oh absolutely, testicles and a penis don't make a man, they make somebody a biological male, so if that is the whole "criteria" quite a lot of animals would be men, on the same token a woman is a bit more than a walking womb (or life-stock used for breeding, I thought that concept went out in most civilized societies decades ago).

The idea that a mans stops being a man because due to an accident or cancer he lost his reproductive organs and his penis, if that would be the case, then the bigger the penis, the more man would one be. Anybody who buys into that, I can gladly forward all the penis extension spam that ends in my mailbox...

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Those who do and those who don't!

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RE: What makes a man a man? - 12/27/2010 5:58:27 AM   
Jaybeee


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Joined: 2/2/2010
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quote:

ORIGINAL: hausboy

quote:

ORIGINAL: Jaybeee

You know, I've often speculated that the battle of the sexes would end if each gender had to spend a month, somehow, as the other.


Most men wouldn't survive a month as a woman....  it's really so much harder. 


Oh? For what reasons?

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Mastery in motion since 2005

Women of the world, submit!

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RE: What makes a man a man? - 12/27/2010 6:31:16 AM   
MrRodgers


Posts: 10542
Joined: 7/30/2005
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"What a piece of work is a man, how noble in reason, how infinite in faculties, in form and moving how express and admirable, in action how like an angel, in apprehension how like a god."

"That man that hath a tongue, I say is no man, if with his tongue he cannot...win a woman."

"O, what men dare do! What men may do! What men daily do, not knowing...what they do!"

"The man that hath no music in himself, Nor is not mov'd with concord of sweet sounds, Is fit for treasons, stratagems, and spoils."

Who among us would even try to compete with such writing of man by William Shakespeare ?

(in reply to SAMHAIN09)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: What makes a man a man? - 12/27/2010 10:04:10 AM   
MaxsGirl


Posts: 355
Joined: 12/2/2010
From: The Arctic Circle
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DMFParadox

Men have cocks and are obliged to use them on women. And be as successful as possible, rated in terms of 'stuff' and 'respeck'. Secondary imperatives are making sure their relatives with and without cocks are reasonably successful. This means:
-Never appear weak, except when you must.
-Spread the love, except when the opportunity cost is too high.
-Never get caught lying, but be a damned fucking good liar.
-Be courageous, except when it's stupid.
-Don't take shit from anyone, except when you must.
-Give shit to everyone, and see if they'll take it.
-Don't get caught either giving or receiving too much shit. But it's better to be caught giving than receiving.
-Unless it's really illegal, and sometimes even then.
-If you kill one dude, you're a murdering bastard. If you kill 10,000, then we're just gonna be over here, you can have all our stuff.
-Take care of your own; burn and pillage the rest.
-Don't get caught burning and pillaging when you're not strong enough to carry through.
-Unless you're really good at bluffing. See: lying.
-After achieving as much burning and pillaging as you can, veto all further actions of that morally repugnant behavior.
-After all, you don't want it coming back around.
-Claim that your ground is the high ground. Maintain this claim in the face of all opposition. And facts; rewrite those.
-Be a team player; it's good publicity, and you'll have a team. You can do a lot more pillaging that way.
-But be 'unique'. You are a special snowflake, by damn, and your particular nonsense hobby is the most important that exists.
-And finally:
-Win. Don't you dare seem weak or inept, because all and sundry will fucking steamroll you. Enjoy your cock, brother.






Now that's what I call a man!

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Collared Fox and
Future Thru-Hiker!

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Profile   Post #: 35
RE: What makes a man a man? - 12/27/2010 10:17:07 AM   
ResidentSadist


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Jaybeee


quote:

ORIGINAL: SAMHAIN09

I'm curious what do you feel makes a man a man?


Ownership of Testes and a Penis.

QFT

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RE: What makes a man a man? - 12/27/2010 10:31:52 AM   
CaringandReal


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Joined: 2/15/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: SAMHAIN09

I'm curious what do you feel makes a man a man?


I used to think I knew the answer to this, but I am no longer so sure. I have known men, with the full signature of "male," trapped in female bodies. (and vice versa).

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RE: What makes a man a man? - 12/27/2010 3:18:22 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline
Gender dysmorphia being what it is, I have to side with self identification as male.

As far as how to act, how to behave like a good man, all those honorable traits that apply to women as well.


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RE: What makes a man a man? - 12/27/2010 6:04:36 PM   
Zevar


Posts: 801
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SAMHAIN09

I'm curious what do you feel makes a man a man?


It could be said:

His decision to mature into an adult, while forsaking his childish ways. His willingness to lay claim to not only his authority as an adult man, but also being willing to look to his inner self determination with the goal of being willing to show up for Life and live Life in a mature manner on a daily basis. His decision to accept each and every responsibility toward whatever is related to demonstrating accountability in his adulthood. These preceding references and countless others could be noted as stepping stones that lay a foundation indicative of being a man. A man that is accountable and abides in integrity i.e. his own autonomous wholeness, that is independent of anyone else.

Regarding genitalia, surely for most men, we do tend to identify as being a man due to our genitalia. In most instances to do so can be said to be accurate in a biological way. However genitalia is of incapable producing evidence related to characteristically maturing. Corporality is in essence a somatic expression manifest in the flesh. The inner man though, unseen yet noticeable, is who decides to demonstrate his character to be noteworthy of being associated with his manhood or not. Therefore the reproductive organs, especially the external genitalia i.e. penis and testicles, are unrelated to the characteristics of manhood. Nonetheless, genitalia is commonly referred to in defining manhood for many and obviously not for all individuals, yet for most unfortunately.

Take care!

(in reply to SAMHAIN09)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: What makes a man a man? - 12/27/2010 6:27:44 PM   
Zevar


Posts: 801
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Jaybeee


quote:

ORIGINAL: SAMHAIN09

I'm curious what do you feel makes a man a man?


Ownership of Testes and a Penis.


Jaybeee:

Sincerely asking the following for consideration:
Suppose for some reason beyond your control you were injured and your external sex organs had to be surgically removed.

What gender would you be?

(in reply to Jaybeee)
Profile   Post #: 40
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