RE: a "daddy dom" cookbook

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RE: a "daddy dom" cookbook - 1/10/2011 4:45:55 AM

BelloDom

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That last line really catches the essence of D/s, doesn't it?

Well said agirl!

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Post #: 21

RE: a "daddy dom" cookbook - 1/11/2011 9:48:18 PM

MasterShake

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As each relationship is different you will have to communicate with each other and gauge what it is she thinks a Daddy is and does. A great way to do this within the context of the power exchange is to have your little girl color a picture of a Daddy and his little girl. Then she can sit on your lap and tell you all about the picture and what happens next. she could also write a story for you to read to her at bed time. These get you into her mind and allow you an image of where to start. Then, using them as a jumping off point Daddy can take it from there and expand. I think the best "cook book" is her mind.

Remember, Daddy is boss. She will expect you to take control and set the tone for her. A little wants a strong, confident Daddy who will not only take care of her but also set and enforce limits for her. She craves your guidance and direction. She wants to be able to let go and let Daddy handle all of these things and keep her safe. I bet that with a few pictures and stories of hers as inspiration, you could take it from there and be a very good, strong Daddy.

Good luck!

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RE: a "daddy dom" cookbook - 1/12/2011 6:27:39 AM

agirl

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quote:

ORIGINAL: leadership527

quote:

AGirl said:
It's the same with most things....and really just boils down to him doing what he wants. I have to say that when it's written down in a list like that , it sounds quite wankerish, in fact it sounds VERY wankerish, even to me, but in the reality of living it , it's not at all.
Well, of course I can't speak for you. But I've noodled over that same thing between Carol and I. My suspicion is that when written from the subs viewpoint, it's all about "he does what he wants". And, honestly, that's pretty correct. What's missing in that very simplistic analysis is that what I want is very colored by what she wants. Between Carol and I, that's what makes it "not wankerish".

Absolutely Jeff. And it's the same here. The *way* he is is very much appreciated by me, even when I'm frustrated. What he *wants* is a happy time with me. If I held any feelings of resentment he'd be mortified.

The fact is, HIM doing what he wants is also ME getting what I want....a fabulously enthusiastic, periodically annoying and frustrating man that has kept me excited and clamouring for his company.

I ought to add that he also finds me a fabulously enthusiastic, periodically annoying and frustrating person too........... it's kept us smiling and pretty intensely connected for many years.

agirl

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RE: a "daddy dom" cookbook - 1/13/2011 11:55:20 PM

antoine654

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just love her. because she is submissive doesnt mean you cant tell or show her you love her.she is a posession to be cherished as well as dominated

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RE: a "daddy dom" cookbook - 1/18/2011 4:00:11 AM

zero69u2

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Control , Structure and Ritual - seem to be the missing element..
adding a element of structure can give the submissive confidence in being submissive.. and adds to the dominant's confidence in being in control and making sure that structure is reinforced.

This isn't for everyone though.. some people who have been in the military will understand how control works in structure.
i've seen this in other people's relationship where a tonal inflection in a dominants voice can change the request into a order almost instantly..
there is Honey, can you get my cup of coffee and there is Honey i'd like my cup of coffee *with a look*, thank you.
the look, the voice of control and simply the way you lead, confidence is reinspired..

Its very subtle.. control in your own bad behavior.. can break bad habits in everyone around you..
noone can really come up with a solution but you and your partner as far as what techniques you employ..
Daddy/lil_girl type dynamic is more of a loving romance state. where your doing certain things out of love and knowledge of what she likes.. maybe the control aspect was lost for a exchange.. you can get this back though.

and back to the original post..
"take her shopping for clothes and toys" that always seems to put a smile on.. until the credit card bill comes back..

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RE: a "daddy dom" cookbook - 1/19/2011 7:40:53 PM

Wyndnfyre

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Being a Daddy is about your behavior and her mindset. You have to show her a loving and beneficial persona. You show her what it is to be cared for like she is your little girl. With your constant and steady behavior she will develop the mindset you want from her. You cannot fake these things with her. You have to help to guide her to be a better person. Whether by improving herself through college or some other aspect of her life she wants to improve. On occasion you will be put into a position where you will have to punish her for detrimental behavior. If you explain to her why she is being punished, the what she did wrong and why it isn't tolerated, she will feel compelled to try not doing it again. She will develop the mindset that you always have her best interest in mind. Remember you cannot fake this behavior for her benefit. You either care for her this way or you aren't the Daddy Dom she wants. Not everyone is a Daddy! Not everyone is a Dom because their partner wants them to be.

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RE: a "daddy dom" cookbook - 1/19/2011 7:54:17 PM

FukinTroll

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After the whole "Want a woman to cook me an eat me" thread. This one made me blink a lil.

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Post #: 27