RE: The Dirtiest Word

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RCdc -> RE: The Dirtiest Word (2/3/2011 8:31:31 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Sundowner No puella - not "room for" ; in my book it's an essential element. Holding a sobbing girl who's just let you tie her up and beat her - the tying and the beating themselves - there's such a closeness and intimacy about that when the relationship has had a romantic content. Le sigh*[:)] Mr SD is so romantic...

TotalDiscipline -> RE: The Dirtiest Word (2/3/2011 9:03:46 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: puella Is there room for romance in this (hate this term) lifestyle? I only have relations with people I like. Without love I never had a M/s relation. I fon't feel anything for slaves/subs even if they would stand naked for me. Love to go out with her..talk with her..buy her flowers and such. If that interest disappears.....then the Dom in me dies to. It is not just owning her. I want to own her..because I love her...in short.

Sundowner -> RE: The Dirtiest Word (2/3/2011 9:21:51 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: RCdc Le sigh*[:)] Mr SD is so romantic... But too late ... and anyway the RC is sooooo manly and romantic too. One can still envy him though :)

RCdc -> RE: The Dirtiest Word (2/3/2011 9:23:31 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Sundowner quote: ORIGINAL: RCdc Le sigh*[:)] Mr SD is so romantic... But too late ... and anyway the RC is sooooo manly and romantic too. One can still envy him though :) That He is.... That He is... :) xxxxx

IrishMist -> RE: The Dirtiest Word (2/3/2011 10:56:20 AM)
quote: In this lifestyle... is there room for real love and real romance? Of course there is, if that's what those involved want and strive for. Sometimes I think that we (generally speaking of course) forget that the 'players' are actually human, with the same wants and needs as any other. Romance and love fall into those categories for some; and for some, they are of less importance.

Tantriqu -> RE: The Dirtiest Word (2/3/2011 2:06:38 PM)
And don't forget to hum, 'Ode to Joy' quote: ORIGINAL: Sundowner quote: ORIGINAL: Tantriqu quote: Pssst - Tantriqu - where do I get one of those? I'm good on the romance bit but I could do with some help on the rest and owning one of those might make me attractive to women. Do they work with the UK power supply? I'm sure there are foot-long Hitachis that work with UK DC, but in the meantime: 1. Buy a roll of Polo mints [Lifesavers to Yanks]: 2. Bring each of them to orgasm with your tongue; no biting! Excellent training for every man and his tongue. Enjoy! <grins at T> What I learned - and it so works - is to lie there contentedly and to keep spelling out the alphabet (in caps of course) with one's tongue until she screams. This is good fun for the lying-there-breathing-in-pure-pussy person as well as for the recipient and it never fails. I commend it to the House.

pittbunny -> RE: The Dirtiest Word (2/4/2011 11:50:18 AM)
Sir Arpig i'm a HUGE Leonard Cohen fan. Can You tell me about Your signature quote: "Be Careful Leonard, they're not like us" ~ Mrs. Cohen Thank You Sincerely, Demanding Owner's pittbunny

Palliata -> RE: The Dirtiest Word (2/5/2011 1:58:03 AM)
We're all looking for the grand love affair. It may manifest differently from person to person and lifestyle to lifestyle, but it is still a nearly-universal human desire.

IronBear -> RE: The Dirtiest Word (2/5/2011 2:11:14 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Palliata We're all looking for the grand love affair. It may manifest differently from person to person and lifestyle to lifestyle, but it is still a nearly-universal human desire. Thus it is that my collars will in all probability remain empty. Still we still play the endless game in the vague hope of finding someone (not taken or collared) who sees things at the same level as we do. quote: ORIGINAL: TotalDiscipline quote: ORIGINAL: puella Is there room for romance in this (hate this term) lifestyle? I only have relations with people I like. Without love I never had a M/s relation. I fon't feel anything for slaves/subs even if they would stand naked for me. Love to go out with her..talk with her..buy her flowers and such. If that interest disappears.....then the Dom in me dies to. It is not just owning her. I want to own her..because I love her...in short. Here is where confusion starts. If you only have relationships with people you like, how can you then state that without love you have never had a M/s relationship? Is this some mystical happening going on or is it the power of osmosis?

GreedyTop -> RE: The Dirtiest Word (2/5/2011 4:35:56 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Palliata We're all looking for the grand love affair. It may manifest differently from person to person and lifestyle to lifestyle, but it is still a nearly-universal human desire. untrue.

Buzzzz -> RE: The Dirtiest Word (2/5/2011 6:39:04 AM)
My 3rd ds relationship, My sub who was very much a slave, was in love with me (maybe the "1st dom syndrom") and I wasn't at all. I was very much into the D part of things without love. I cared about her, just didn't love her. but then again ,I only fell in love once..she also couldn't deal with the poly part (had no problem fucking others, just couldn't deal with the other relationship). I believe it is doable without love .. if everybody has their goal/needs/wants met.. I big talk and discussion is needed before the involvment, to set boundaries and such...I hope what I am saying makes sensw, because I am not the greatest guy to explain things while typing (I am more a math kinda guy [:)])

lizi -> RE: The Dirtiest Word (2/5/2011 4:47:15 PM)
Heck yes it's possible. In fact it's necessary for my relationship, others are free to do whatever floats their boat but we're a D/s couple at the heart of things and a couple in love with each other in the most romantic ways possible on top of that. The love part doesn't change the D/s part but it does influence it and we're fine with that - we like it that way. Romantic gestures tell those we are in love with that they matter to us...what's wrong with telling them that? On the other side why shouldn't we know that we are important to another? I think it's a healthy and meaningful way to keep the relationship going in optimal condition. Sure, it's not for everyone, I can understand that. Last night my Dom surprised me with a visit to a German dance hall. We had delicious German food and danced polkas all night long by the music of a one man band (the guy was amazing actually, the German version of Bill Murray's cheesy lounge singer act complete with accordians, you had to be there to appreciate it). There were many different races in attendance and all ages. Every single person there had a blast including myself- I cannot remember that last time I laughed so hard for so long. Does it sound romantic? Not particularly, I mean come on, we did the Chicken Dance. But...my guy went to the effort of finding something unusual to do, something he thought I'd enjoy, something from my past (I'm part German and I got to relive every family wedding I've ever been to last night) and he went through to trouble of 'surprising' me with it - it actually turned out to be very romantic. We laughed our behinds off, got sweaty, and held each other close during the slow dances as well. If this type of thing isn't 'real' D/s then I don't want to be a part of the 'real' thing. I like our version of D/s where romance and love dictate what we do and how things go, rather than some notion of conforming to an image. The cool thing is that you can interpret what it means to you- heck, maybe I'd feel differently with someone else but with this particular combination of two people, it works very well the way we're doing it. One more thing, being in love and having romance absolutely does not mean being soft or that he panders to me. I have bruises regularly from playing, some protocol to mind, and he holds me to a high standard as far as accomplishing what he deems as important. He loves me and romances me but he still beats on my ass because he feels like it, and does not in any way accept substandard behavior or whatever on my part.

graceadieu -> RE: The Dirtiest Word (2/6/2011 9:18:50 AM)
Romance and love are beautiful, wonderful things. I wouldn't want a serious relationship without them. I don't need flowers and diamond rings, but cuddles and kisses and "I love you"s are really important to me. :)

TotalDiscipline -> RE: The Dirtiest Word (2/6/2011 11:49:16 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: IronBear Here is where confusion starts. If you only have relationships with people you like, how can you then state that without love you have never had a M/s relationship? Is this some mystical happening going on or is it the power of osmosis? what confusion? or do you mean like and love beeing mixed up. That I would understand. ..and osmose is never excluded ( neither is diffusion lol) ;) I have only relations with people I like. For a M/s relation to happen..I need to like them..and love them. Because a M/s relation for me needs to be more..then just liking. It is eassier to explain in my own language..but I hope this clears it up. My steps; tollerate>like> love

leadership527 -> RE: The Dirtiest Word (2/6/2011 12:27:59 PM)
Between Carol and I, love and D/s are interwoven and they reinforce each other. I feel "loved" because she works so hard to be perfect for me. That, in turn inspires me to love her back which is expressed both in the commands I give her (which demonstrate a deep, personal awareness of her) and in the generally nurturing and protective bubble I create for her to live in. That, in turn, inspires her to redouble her efforts to be perfect for me and the whole cycle goes around and around and we get happier and happier with each passing year. Did that explain the mechanic for us?

SourandSweet -> RE: The Dirtiest Word (2/6/2011 12:34:17 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: leadership527 Between Carol and I, love and D/s are interwoven and they reinforce each other. I feel "loved" because she works so hard to be perfect for me. That, in turn inspires me to love her back which is expressed both in the commands I give her (which demonstrate a deep, personal awareness of her) and in the generally nurturing and protective bubble I create for her to live in. That, in turn, inspires her to redouble her efforts to be perfect for me and the whole cycle goes around and around and we get happier and happier with each passing year. Did that explain the mechanic for us? That's just... beautiful. :-)

LadyRian -> RE: The Dirtiest Word (2/6/2011 1:02:56 PM)
I think there's definitely room for love and romance within the confines of BDSM. (Pun intended.) I personally couldn't have it any other way. One of the problems, however, as I see it, is what I would call a "sincerity discrepancy" between partners. And proof of sincerity is based on actions, not words. As is proof of insincerity. edited for speling

Kana -> RE: The Dirtiest Word (2/6/2011 1:47:52 PM)
There quite certainly is romance. Course I use it as an extension of sadism. Think it through...if I'm a sadistic bastard all the time, then I have become predictable. Buuuuuuuuuuuut, if occasionally I am all nice, sweet and lovey dovey, then she never has any idea what's coming :-) Plus, nothing better than shifting gears rapidly, moving from romance and whispering sweet nothings to a brutal session.

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