-=Sometimes ignorance is bliss=-

-=Sometimes ignorance is bliss=- (Full Version)

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ResidentSadist -> -=Sometimes ignorance is bliss=- (2/16/2011 2:15:30 PM)
At a BDSM event, in the morning, a couple on their first date sits at the breakfast table. The buffet is splendid and both look rather chipper after last night’s activities. The dominant puts on an approving expression and prepares to dispense a healthy dose of “good girl” reinforcement. He thanks the submissive for doing a good job handling the humiliation session the night before. The submissive looks puzzled . . . and asks the dominant what he is talking about? He explains that leading her around on all fours at the end of a leash in public was a great humiliation session. With a dumbfounded look, the submissive explains they weren’t humiliated but quite the opposite. They felt proud to publicly display they were under the control of the dominant and were a worthy subject. They felt more like a precious possession than a humiliated slut. In this case, both were happy in their own ignorance and it wasn’t until the morning after that they realized their differences. Sometimes, ignorance truly is bliss. The same act can evoke completely different reactions depending on the participants and their level of communication. Trying to humiliate an exhibitionist by stripping them in public may not get you the reaction you are looking for. Yet, under the right circumstance, with good communication, that same exhibitionist can be told they are being stripped as punishment, that they aren’t worthy of the clothes you provided and you are going to expose their naked flaws for all to see. On the other hand, you can take a bashful girl and explain you are proud to own her and going to strip her for all to see the same beauty you see in your property. There is some degree of miscommunication in almost everyone’s life (and on these forums) and I thought this might make a worthy post. It doesn’t often end in mutual bliss like our couple at the BDSM event. I feel compassion for those who’s lives are affected by miscommunication and thought this post might inspire you to share some of your own stories.

hausboy -> RE: -=Sometimes ignorance is bliss=- (2/16/2011 3:08:16 PM)
Thanks RS. This post reminds me why I stay on CM--it's for gems like this!

ImaginativeWhims -> RE: -=Sometimes ignorance is bliss=- (2/16/2011 7:34:39 PM)
Thank you RS.

Docere -> RE: -=Sometimes ignorance is bliss=- (2/16/2011 9:17:12 PM)
You are correct, it is a very worthy post and a point well worth mentioning. What we see is not always what we believe it to be and what we hear is not always what was meant. It's important to pause, step back and think before simply reacting and in this we can avoid misunderstandings and the frustrations that follow. I wish I had a story to share with you but I would only end up torturing you in the attempt. I will raise my voice with yours though and encourage others to chime in.

peppermint -> RE: -=Sometimes ignorance is bliss=- (2/16/2011 9:36:40 PM)
How simple yet so true.

LadyPact -> RE: -=Sometimes ignorance is bliss=- (2/17/2011 1:46:31 AM)
Kalon, it's good to see you posting and I appreciated the story. I don't have a story to share at the moment. Instead, I'll just share My thoughts. The above is exactly why I don't like to give suggestions on the 'how do I punish' and 'how do I humiliate' threads. I can toss out as many suggestions as the day is long, but that doesn't mean that the person someone is dealing with is going to feel punished or humiliated. Why anyone ever feels that strangers on the internet will know how a person will respond better than the person they are in the dynamic with is beyond Me. Maybe ignorance is bliss at times. I'd rather see stories like the above as opportunities.

gungadin09 -> RE: -=Sometimes ignorance is bliss=- (2/17/2011 1:52:23 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist In this case, both were happy in their own ignorance and it wasn’t until the morning after that they realized their differences. Sometimes, ignorance truly is bliss. The same act can evoke completely different reactions depending on the participants and their level of communication. i'm not sure how to answer this question. First i wanted to say that ignorance isn't bliss, it's just...ignorance. But in the past i've displayed levels of idealism and naivety that probably bordered on ignorance. And yes, it was bliss. Reality is a such a bitch. Don't really want to share a story, though. pam

DocksideWhore -> RE: -=Sometimes ignorance is bliss=- (2/17/2011 4:06:10 AM)
I agree with Pam. Both were ignorant and hadn't taken the time to get to know how their minds work. Sad really. Personally I wouldn't sub for anyone that didn't have an idea of how such an act would affect me.

GreedyTop -> RE: -=Sometimes ignorance is bliss=- (2/17/2011 4:07:40 AM)
it isnt that ACT that is the point Dock.. it's the perspective.

Prinsexx -> RE: -=Sometimes ignorance is bliss=- (2/17/2011 4:37:31 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist I feel compassion for those who’s lives are affected by miscommunication and thought this post might inspire you to share some of your own stories. Dear Inamorato: bdsm is indeed a Commedia dell’Arte . Often where ignorance is bliss ‘tis folly to be wise. Pierrette.

Palliata -> RE: -=Sometimes ignorance is bliss=- (2/17/2011 7:07:51 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyPact Kalon, it's good to see you posting and I appreciated the story. I don't have a story to share at the moment. Instead, I'll just share My thoughts. The above is exactly why I don't like to give suggestions on the 'how do I punish' and 'how do I humiliate' threads. I can toss out as many suggestions as the day is long, but that doesn't mean that the person someone is dealing with is going to feel punished or humiliated. Why anyone ever feels that strangers on the internet will know how a person will respond better than the person they are in the dynamic with is beyond Me. Maybe ignorance is bliss at times. I'd rather see stories like the above as opportunities. This is an excellent point. Everyone experiences things differently, and without knowing the person even the best dom is going to be shooting in the dark. That said, a few general suggestions from experienced people on the web or elsewhere can be valuable - if the person doesn't have any experience of their own, some simple ideas to get them started can be invaluable. As to the original topic, my first instinct is to say that those sorts of miscommunication, even when apparently beneficial, leave the relationship with holes which are to be avoided. If you're moving at cross purposes, eventually it is going to catch up with you. A bit of mutual self-deception can make for a wonderful evening, but it makes for a tragic life.

GreedyTop -> RE: -=Sometimes ignorance is bliss=- (2/17/2011 7:20:44 AM)
quote: That said, a few general suggestions from experienced people on the web or elsewhere can be valuable - if the person doesn't have any experience of their own, some simple ideas to get them started can be invaluable in some cases, that well meant advice may act as a template to a newbie... in other words, the newbie may take it as The One Twue Way.. and thereby deprive said newbie of the richness and beauty of their own discoveries. Like I said. RS's post was about perspective....

Palliata -> RE: -=Sometimes ignorance is bliss=- (2/17/2011 7:35:15 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: GreedyTop quote: That said, a few general suggestions from experienced people on the web or elsewhere can be valuable - if the person doesn't have any experience of their own, some simple ideas to get them started can be invaluable in some cases, that well meant advice may act as a template to a newbie... in other words, the newbie may take it as The One Twue Way.. and thereby deprive said newbie of the richness and beauty of their own discoveries. Like I said. RS's post was about perspective.... True enough.

Prinsexx -> RE: -=Sometimes ignorance is bliss=- (2/17/2011 8:32:20 AM)
This isn’t a When Harry Met Sally Moment. That’s what ‘nilla’s do: fake orgasm over a coffee. Let’s face it: faking orgasms can get the mortgage paid, keeps the kids at school and the bit on the side secret in a hotel room somewhere right? This is a moment après disclosure, when she confessed her needs and they matched his deepest desires. What happens after the bliss? Fear? Withdrawal? Drop? Reflection? Divorce? The implications of a life changing event? A realisation of honesty? Love? The reconciliation of the violence within his heart that would otherwise be turned outward? The recognition that beauty's not just a mask but a smeared and painful rendition of what Hollywood would have us believe? An exorcism of the demons from a past, moments of regression? A satisfaction, at least, of all that has remained undisclosed? Not recoiling from acknowledgement of all of that and still moving forward is indeed for the brave. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R8OOWcsFj0U

GreedyTop -> RE: -=Sometimes ignorance is bliss=- (2/17/2011 9:15:57 AM)
Huh? it's about perspective, Prinny.

slaveluci -> RE: -=Sometimes ignorance is bliss=- (2/17/2011 12:28:57 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Prinsexx This isn't a When Harry Met Sally moment. That’s what ‘nilla’s do: fake orgasm over a coffee. Speaking of ignorance....what an erroneous generalization there.........hmm luci

Prinsexx -> RE: -=Sometimes ignorance is bliss=- (2/17/2011 12:42:22 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: GreedyTop Huh? it's about perspective, Prinny. Two point perspective works better than one.

Prinsexx -> RE: -=Sometimes ignorance is bliss=- (2/17/2011 12:44:41 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: slaveluci quote: ORIGINAL: Prinsexx This isn't a When Harry Met Sally moment. That’s what ‘nilla’s do: fake orgasm over a coffee. Speaking of ignorance....what an erroneous generalization there.........hmm luci I know. Obviously.

RCdc -> RE: -=Sometimes ignorance is bliss=- (2/17/2011 12:49:54 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Prinsexx quote: ORIGINAL: slaveluci quote: ORIGINAL: Prinsexx This isn't a When Harry Met Sally moment. That’s what ‘nilla’s do: fake orgasm over a coffee. Speaking of ignorance....what an erroneous generalization there.........hmm luci I know. Obviously. Goodness Prinnie... you know us Brits aren't supposed to have a sense of humour or irony...[;)] Disclaimer... the above statement is obviously an erromeous generalisation.

Prinsexx -> RE: -=Sometimes ignorance is bliss=- (2/17/2011 4:02:02 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: RCdc quote: ORIGINAL: Prinsexx quote: ORIGINAL: slaveluci quote: ORIGINAL: Prinsexx This isn't a When Harry Met Sally moment. That’s what ‘nilla’s do: fake orgasm over a coffee. Speaking of ignorance....what an erroneous generalization there.........hmm luci I know. Obviously. Goodness Prinnie... you know us Brits aren't supposed to have a sense of humour or irony...[;)] Disclaimer... the above statement is obviously an erromeous generalisation. Now you know me: did I ever say anything with my tongue other than where it should be? Edited to add: I though When Harry Met Sally was a film? Oh you mean she real really was cumming over coffee?

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