In need of a pep talk

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In need of a pep talk - 5/7/2006 1:48:29 PM

zebra

Posts: 64
Joined: 7/24/2005
Status: offline

This is not a rant, I promise. If I were in the mood to rant I could go look at a mirror and do it, since I'm the one who probably deserves to be ranted at. I'm getting impatient and sad and would really appreciate hearing a few stories about how you -- you who are in relationships that you find satisfying and rewarding -- were kind of at the end of the line, too, but didn't give up and how good things then happened. Or from you who decided that it's ok not to have an outlet for these feelings and needs and would be kind enough to talk to me (off the boards, if you like).

Please?

Just don't make me tooooooo jealous, ok?

zebra (female, little one)

< Message edited by zebra -- 5/7/2006 1:57:07 PM >

RE: In need of a pep talk - 5/7/2006 2:00:39 PM

Posts: 9718
Joined: 2/20/2006
From: Kentucky
Status: offline

You are not alone Zebra...I too get impatient and sad. Email me if you would like to talk.

_____________________________

Dance like no one is watching,
Sing like no one is listening.
Love like you've never been hurt
and live like it's heaven on Earth.

(in reply to zebra)

RE: In need of a pep talk - 5/7/2006 2:05:02 PM

Posts: 2918
Status: offline

hi zebra, sorry to hear your feeling down. If you still need someone to talk to you can email me anytime. I had a gap of around 4 years between being in Master/slave relationship and I found myself completely happy so could talk to you from that perspective if you like.

_____________________________

Freedom in Bondage

Different Strokes for Different Folks

"I'll always have a *soft spot* for Sadists"

(in reply to zebra)

RE: In need of a pep talk - 5/7/2006 2:07:58 PM

zebra

Posts: 64
Joined: 7/24/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: slavejali

hi zebra, sorry to hear your feeling down. If you still need someone to talk to you can email me anytime. I had a gap of around 4 years between being in Master/slave relationship and I found myself completely happy so could talk to you from that perspective if you like.

Thank you, slavejali and you, cuddleheart, I will e-mail you both. One thing I should have added before -- I just turned 49 and it took me till I was 42 to even begin to explore this part of myself, so now I feel like: "I'm too old to be anybody's little girl and I'm going to have to figure out how to live and die without it." Hard thoughts. I know they sound stupid, too, but they are quite real.

zebra

(in reply to slavejali)

RE: In need of a pep talk - 5/7/2006 2:12:20 PM

Posts: 3403
Joined: 10/7/2005
Status: offline

*smiles* this one came to the lifestyle after 40 herself, we walk where we walk to get where we are going.

this one is having a day where she can use a pep talk to but only b/c she misses Master and Mistress(blames it on the rain)

so if this one bends over willya kick her in the butt

hope that got a laff outta ya

email this one on the other side if you like

_____________________________

"Accordingly, men must then either fulfill their nature, or deny it, and in denying their nature, deny us ours, for ours is the complement to theirs. " Renegades

(in reply to zebra)

RE: In need of a pep talk - 5/7/2006 2:12:49 PM

Posts: 447
Joined: 12/26/2005
From: NW Arkansas
Status: offline

zebra, zebra she's our gal, if she can't do it, no one shall!!

hoping that is the kind of fun peppy you can appreciate! in all seriousness, the other side of your coin will find you please have faith and continue learning until such time he discovers you. i wasn't looking at all and had resigned myself to being uncollared until my own circumstances were a little more appealing and attractive for Doms to consider me. honestly, i did not expect to be sought after except in cyber, which in all actuality seemed the safest for my situation. i know this kind of thinking causes great debate but if i do click with somebody online, usually i do meet them to see if chemistry is there. chemistry is just as important as possessing my mind and heart. i am now in a training collar and my Master is a good Daddie. *smilez* do not be disheartened. he found me when i had given up trying and resigned myself to more lonely venues. if you would like to write to me, please feel free to do so as well.

_____________________________

~~ lil darlin' ~~
hope

(in reply to cuddleheart50)

RE: In need of a pep talk - 5/7/2006 2:21:32 PM

Posts: 84
Joined: 4/17/2006
Status: offline

I just turned 49 and it took me till I was 42 to even begin to explore this part of myself, so now I feel like: "I'm too old to be anybody's little girl and I'm going to have to figure out how to live and die without it." Hard thoughts. I know they sound stupid, too, but they are quite real.

zebra
[/quote]

zebra, im 38 and just beginning to explore. it is scary and i am having trouble being patient. i can't give any really good advice like slavejali but i can suggest that it will be that much more special when it finally does happen. if you do need to rant, message me, i can be a good listener if nothing else.

(in reply to zebra)

RE: In need of a pep talk - 5/7/2006 3:29:03 PM

Posts: 44
Joined: 4/30/2006
Status: offline

Hello zebra,

i'm a lifestyle slave and have been in a permanent relationship now with Master for a year and a half. i've been active in the lifestyle 9 years now and have had many days myself of tears and frustration. How many potential Master's have i contacted in that time, played with, had coffee, lunch and dinner with or limited relationships? i don't even want to count them :) i'm 44 now and Master is 46 and we talk often about age creeping up on us. Take heart. Many people enter the lifestyle later in life and find it rewarding for years. In fact, there are more middle aged people in it than young people, from what i've ever seen. There is a local lady that started at 60! She quickly became the sweetheart of the boys and a well known Mistress. Last picture i saw of her, she looked immensely happy.

My advice to you as it is to all people looking...never stop. Meet people, talk to people, trust your instincts, experience and don't give up. Get out to munches, clubs, bdsm social and play gatherings. Become known. Be open, be positive, be sincere. Be someone people want to get to know, treat yourself as if you are special (you are) but keep your humility (you're not THAT special). You will need to sift and sift and sift and sift until you meet the right person that it all clicks with but it will happen. The newer you are, the more you have to learn and experience before you are ready to settle down with THE ONE...if you ever are. But i have seen it happen over and over...people going along, playing with this or that person and wham! Mr or Mistress Right walks into their life. Usually they don't see it coming. So have faith. And in the meantime, enjoy what you are learning and experiencing.

spicey

(in reply to texasbutterfly)

RE: In need of a pep talk - 5/7/2006 4:14:05 PM

zebra

Posts: 64
Joined: 7/24/2005
Status: offline

Thank you so much, everyone -- spicey. texas butterfly, slave hope. fyrered -- I am very grateful for all these words of both wisdom and compassion.

This means a lot to me.

zebra

(in reply to allspicey)

RE: In need of a pep talk - 5/7/2006 4:39:04 PM

Posts: 2299
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

Dear zebra;

{{BIGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG HUG}}}}

Sincerely supportive,
Lady Hugs

(in reply to zebra)

RE: In need of a pep talk - 5/7/2006 4:44:09 PM

zebra

Posts: 64
Joined: 7/24/2005
Status: offline

*smiles* thanks!

(in reply to LadyHugs)

RE: In need of a pep talk - 5/7/2006 8:56:49 PM

Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline

This is going to sound snotty coming from someone in a relationship, but, I SO promise you it's not.

There are certain times in our lives when...it's just not meant to be. That we are meant to learn to live with our own selves, and possibly learn some other lessons we need to grow. If, during that time, you try to 'force' a relationship to work, both you and the other person will end up sorely disappointed.

In the meantime, dear Zebra, love and nurture yourself...and help yourself become the best person you can be, so that when the time is right, and you DO meet that special someone, you are secure in the knowledge of what you have to give.

Best of luck to you. I'm sure you'll be happily surprised by what the future holds for you.

(in reply to zebra)

RE: In need of a pep talk - 5/7/2006 9:04:42 PM

Posts: 2071
Joined: 6/25/2005
Status: offline

sweety, starting out later in life doesn't make things impossible. i started out at 17 and i'm still wandering around trying to find myself and the one i want to belong to for all time.

My mother didn't meet the love of her life until she was 49. My father is 67 and still single. One just never really knows.

I take each expereince and each person i meet and treasure what i learn. It might not work for long or even at all but something worthwhile always comes from every experience.

*huuggss*

I'm an optimist and believe something good is going to arrive in our lives. We just have to choose to see it when it comes.

"takes a crop to the spelling gnomes"

< Message edited by akisha -- 5/7/2006 9:10:13 PM >

_____________________________

I'm confused.... No wait!!! Maybe I'm not

It's not a blonde moment! It's momentary peroxide posioning. ;)

Your pain makes me smile ~ Happy Bunny

532-095-649

(in reply to xxblushesxx)

RE: In need of a pep talk - 5/7/2006 9:08:47 PM

Posts: 421
Joined: 2/16/2006
Status: offline

What's wrong?

_____________________________

-Babysburnin

"Love is, above all else, the gift of oneself."
- Jean Anouilh

"The highest proof of virtue is to possess boundless power without abusing it."
- Lord Macaulay

(in reply to zebra)

RE: In need of a pep talk - 5/7/2006 9:10:53 PM

TemptingNviceSub

Posts: 3054
Joined: 10/1/2005
Status: offline

Ach!..49 ...doesnt it just suck!...I am with you girl...be well..tempting

(in reply to akisha)

RE: In need of a pep talk - 5/7/2006 9:59:01 PM

Posts: 6142
Joined: 1/31/2004
From: Washington
Status: offline

quote:

I just turned 49 and it took me till I was 42 to even begin to explore this part of myself, so now I feel like: "I'm too old to be anybody's little girl and I'm going to have to figure out how to live and die without it." Hard thoughts. I know they sound stupid, too, but they are quite real.

If it makes you feel better i was 54 before i started exploring this way of life.

_____________________________

proudsub

"Without goals you become what you were. With goals you become what you wish." .

"You are entitled to your own opinions but not your own facts"--Alan Greenspan

(in reply to zebra)

RE: In need of a pep talk - 5/8/2006 3:38:06 AM

Posts: 9718
Joined: 2/20/2006
From: Kentucky
Status: offline

I'm 50 and have only been in the lifestyle for a couple of years....

_____________________________

Dance like no one is watching,
Sing like no one is listening.
Love like you've never been hurt
and live like it's heaven on Earth.

(in reply to proudsub)

RE: In need of a pep talk - 5/8/2006 4:55:04 PM

zebra

Posts: 64
Joined: 7/24/2005
Status: offline

Thank you again, all of you. I agree (in theory, lol) that loving and nurturing one's self is the best place to start -- and no, blushes, what you said wasn't at all snotty -- but oh my goodness that impatient little girl inside wants her daddy so bad! But I am so grateful for the pep talks, the commiseration, the off-the-board contacts. It was JUST what I needed. Plus one of fyrereds boots in the pants and a Lady Hugs special hug.

You are great, all.

zebra

(in reply to cuddleheart50)

RE: In need of a pep talk - 5/9/2006 8:54:27 PM

Posts: 170
Joined: 10/28/2005
Status: offline

4 years between my first and the D/s relationship I´m in now. 4 lonely years substituted by self-bondage, occasional cyberflirting with dommes and futile attempts to court other dommes.
The waiting game can leave a lot of loosers but those who keep playing nonetheless still have a chance of winning some.

_____________________________

Smack me around and call me Suzy...

(in reply to zebra)

RE: In need of a pep talk - 5/10/2006 5:23:33 AM

Posts: 2706
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline

It's ok, we have all been there. My search took 6 years. After a disasterous trip to meet a couple(3 days on a train) i rented a car and decided to visit some friends. I went online here at CM to send an email to a buddy and the profile on screen said ScooterTrash, i had stopped looking at this point for over three months, but i loved the nic so i emailed. Here i am, literally twice happy.

Email me anytime you like,no worries.

_____________________________

Infinite Diversity in Infinite Combinations.

The human heart is not a finite container but an ever expanding universe with all the stars contained there in.

(in reply to zebra)

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