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HOw do you balance the lifestyle and religious beliefs? - 5/9/2011 4:06:44 PM   
mech1nomics


Posts: 82
Joined: 5/5/2011
Status: offline 		Hey CM,

Just as the title says I was wondering how do you balance the lifestyle with your religious beliefs. I dont practice one particular religion instead Im one for the " easy living doing good for the sake of good and what goes around comes around".
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RE: HOw do you balance the lifestyle and religious beli... - 5/9/2011 4:38:19 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline 		I've never found them to not be balanced. I'm a christian with old fashioned values as man as head of the household and the Godhead of the family so they seem to balance quite nicely for me.


(in reply to mech1nomics)
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RE: HOw do you balance the lifestyle and religious beli... - 5/9/2011 4:43:18 PM   
mech1nomics


Posts: 82
Joined: 5/5/2011
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

I've never found them to not be balanced. I'm a christian with old fashioned values as man as head of the household and the Godhead of the family so they seem to balance quite nicely for me.





I totally get that as that goes hand in hand with your beliefs. I guess Im looking for the HINdu guy with the foot fetish or the submissive muslim man or even the dominant afghani woman. Ok upon my proofread maybe thats a bit over the top.

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RE: HOw do you balance the lifestyle and religious beli... - 5/9/2011 4:52:35 PM   
MissImmortalPain


Posts: 2440
Joined: 4/1/2011
Status: offline 		Mech, it seems like what you are looking for are contradictory views between ones faith and ones kink(for lack of a better word) It is an interesting question but unless you find someone new to a given faith, or kink, I don't think you are likely to find anyone that has had to balance the two. It is often a great deal easier for a person to find balance in the things they really believe in. In some cases people don't even have to look for the balance because it was there to begin with.

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It is always by way of pain that we arrive at pleasure.

We must all go through a right of passage,and it must be physical, it must be painful,and it must leave a mark.

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RE: HOw do you balance the lifestyle and religious beli... - 5/9/2011 5:02:38 PM   
mech1nomics


Posts: 82
Joined: 5/5/2011
Status: offline 		I like that @MissImmortalPain...I like that alot. Hey what can I say call me a "rubblerouser" lol.

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So I was looking down at my crotch and didnt see the top of your head!...ok sure Ill take one step down this ladder but being on top is so fun!..think this is random then you should hear me speak!

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RE: HOw do you balance the lifestyle and religious beli... - 5/9/2011 5:40:17 PM   
Rochsub2009


Posts: 2536
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: mech1nomics

Hey CM,

Just as the title says I was wondering how do you balance the lifestyle with your religious beliefs. I dont practice one particular religion.......


Without basing the question on one specific religion, it's pretty hard to know how to answer it.  It also depends on what your particular kink is.  Asking the question generically probably won't lead to the detailed answers that you might get if you asked more specifically.  For example, "how does one balance male submission with the Christian belief that the man should be the head of the household?"

But trying to find the right balance between your religion and your kink is not a new dilemma.


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RE: HOw do you balance the lifestyle and religious beli... - 5/9/2011 7:21:07 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		I don't find any disconnect between my religion and my sexual likes and my relationship dynamic. There isn't any disconnect. What I do is natural for me, this is my preferred way of relating, my preferred way of getting maximum pleasure from sex. Why do you assume that doing what I'm hard wired to do is by definition wrong? Your assumption is that there must be a problem because no religion would approve of this. Why do you think so? Why do you have a problem in using the life God gave you, and the body God gave you, in a way that works optimally for you? Why do you believe God gave you these things in order to deny you the use of them, or to punish you for using them as they were designed?

Whether I want to be on top or on bottom does not determine how close I am to him. There's nothing in my religion that talks about sex or about relationships in that way. God is more than the sex police, stop reducing him to that.


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Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


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RE: How do you balance the lifestyle and religious beli... - 5/9/2011 7:37:12 PM   
sunshinemiss


Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
Status: offline 		I think you need to understand religion a bit more if you think there is a difficulty with balancing the two.

Answer to your first question:
I'm generally Quaker, and that is about living simply and recognizing the "G*d" spirit in each of us, the authority and responsibility of each person to live an honorable life. I have no issue around the balance. Ebb and flow of who's in charge, choosing decent and honorable people to have in my life, recognizing and acting on the simplicity of attraction, desire, affection. Not an issue.

So... let me see if I can answer your more specific questions:

quote:

I guess Im looking for the HINdu guy with the foot fetish

as long as it isn't bovine, I don't know how that would be an issue.
One of the four main principles of Hinduism is about sexuality and desire. Not an issue.

quote:

or the submissive muslim man

The word "Islam" means "Submission" so there really ought not be any issue here.

quote:

or even the dominant afghani woman.

You mistake a country for a religion here.


So, basically, there's no issue based on RELIGION. If there is an issue, it may be cultural or have to do with upbringing.

best,
sunshine


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Yes, I am a wonton hussy... and still sweet as 3.14

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RE: HOw do you balance the lifestyle and religious beli... - 5/9/2011 7:49:02 PM   
NiceGuyNihilist


Posts: 194
Joined: 3/25/2011
Status: offline 		I was raised in the Mormon culture and began having submissive fantasies in kindergarten, or maybe even earlier. I've always had a conviction that my submissive urge is innate. Until I was about 16, I believed in Mormonism and rather blithely assumed there couldn't be a conflict between the church and my desire to submit to a woman, because a) God made me the way I am, b) God loves me and wants my supreme joy, and c) God made the church. When I read or heard the standard admonitions to submit to your husband's priesthood authority, or to righteously lead your wife with the same, I pretty much shrugged and assumed they must not apply to me. When I pondered my existence in heaven before birth (a central tenet of Mormonism), I sometimes envisioned myself living in a state of innocent, asexual submission to the premortal women there, one of whom would be my dominant wife on Earth if I was worthy of her. (I had to suppress a shudder just now. Mormons enjoy the word worthy more than any self-respecting person should.) I even considered asking the local bishop if it might be okay to turn my future temple marriage--among the most sacrosanct of all Mormon events--into a collaring ceremony! (Part of me wishes I had asked. I'd have gotten a hell of a story out of it, if nothing else.)

Of course I was aware of the church's adamant stance against gay partnerships, but again, I didn't think the shadow of disapproval fell on me. In fact--I'm sorry to say--I sided with the church. I didn't believe gays and lesbians were being honest like I was when they said their desires were innate. If I'd given the matter a little more thought, I might have drawn the conclusion that the only reason Mormon leaders didn't wag their fingers at gynarchic households was that there weren't enough of them out there--not flying pride flags, anyway.

In high school, I read Darwin and turned agnostic within a week. While I believed in God, I was fortunate enough to believe in one who liked me.

(in reply to Rochsub2009)
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RE: HOw do you balance the lifestyle and religious beli... - 5/9/2011 7:54:25 PM   
mummyman321


Posts: 2102
Joined: 10/31/2005
From: Dusseldorf
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: mech1nomics
Hey CM,

Just as the title says I was wondering how do you balance the lifestyle with your religious beliefs. I dont practice one particular religion instead Im one for the " easy living doing good for the sake of good and what goes around comes around".


In what religion does it say "Though shall not do BDSM"? If anything most religions teach acceptance of others, not exclusion. It sounds more like you feel it is wrong and not religion.

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Life - Its not about where you are but about the journey to get there - I prefer to choose the road less traveled

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RE: HOw do you balance the lifestyle and religious beli... - 5/9/2011 8:00:00 PM   
SailingBum


Posts: 3225
Joined: 12/10/2007
From: Sailin the stormy sea
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MissImmortalPain

Mech, it seems like what you are looking for are contradictory views between ones faith and ones kink(for lack of a better word) It is an interesting question but unless you find someone new to a given faith, or kink, I don't think you are likely to find anyone that has had to balance the two. It is often a great deal easier for a person to find balance in the things they really believe in. In some cases people don't even have to look for the balance because it was there to begin with.



Apparently there are not many devout Christians reading this post. If you follow the basic tenets of the church you attend I would suspect most of you are at odds with your churches belief system. For example most religions consider the adultery commandment to mean, if your doing the deed outside of marriage your committing it. Another for the catholic readers, You can only use your seed to procreate. The whole gay issue

Typically what happens is most of us "rationalize" our beliefs to suit our life style. "Yea God I know you meant adultery is a sin but really everyone else is doing it. Ya see where Im going with this.

From the looks of it most of you sinners are going straight to hell. If you get there before me save me a spot as I m sure to be joining you.

BadOne


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We are all so very lucky to have you with us to impart your great wisdom.

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RE: HOw do you balance the lifestyle and religious beli... - 5/9/2011 8:16:09 PM   
Rochsub2009


Posts: 2536
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SailingBum

Apparently there are not many devout Christians reading this post. If you follow the basic tenets of the church you attend I would suspect most of you are at odds with your churches belief system. For example most religions consider the adultery commandment to mean, if your doing the deed outside of marriage your committing it. Another for the catholic readers, You can only use your seed to procreate. The whole gay issue



Sailing Bum,
I agree with you.  That's why I said that the OP needed to specify which religion and which act he was referring to.  I can find elements of BDSM that conflict with many/most religions that I can think of.  I'm surprised to hear so many say that they are unable to identify any such conflicts.

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RE: HOw do you balance the lifestyle and religious beli... - 5/9/2011 8:19:13 PM   
Hillwilliam


Posts: 19394
Joined: 8/27/2008
Status: offline 		Think 'Monogamous 50's household.'

Definitely in tune with about any religion you could imagine and definitely one of the subsets of WIITWD.

_____________________________

Kinkier than a cheap garden hose.

Whoever said "Religion is the opiate of the masses" never heard Right Wing talk radio.

Don't blame me, I voted for Gary Johnson.

(in reply to Rochsub2009)
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RE: HOw do you balance the lifestyle and religious beli... - 5/9/2011 8:25:35 PM   
sunshinemiss


Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
Status: offline 		~FR more or less~

Honestly, I understand the question, and yes, I recognize the conflicts. However, I like to think that I've gotten to a point in my life where I recognize religion as the tool that it is meant to be rather than a weapon it has been turned into. Religion as it is presented to the masses, the communal / group-think type of setup certainly can create the kind of conflict noted in the OP. However, by going beyond the mob mentality, I can find a purer, deeper, more profound understanding of humanity via religion (ymmv).

Having lived with people of deep devotion in several different spiritual beliefs, I find the Truth to be more personal, more private, and more flexible than any group-sponsored religion. It has been said that "Religion is the opium of the masses," and I can fully understand that. I choose to NOT ingraciate myself into those groups because of the mob mentality that often arises. Spirituality, on the other hand, for me is the connection to G*d. It is in spirituality that I find the lack of dissonance. Perhaps I am splitting hairs (it wouldn't be the first time), but I find a huge difference in the spiritual aspects of religion and the cultural / group-think aspects.

best,
sunshine

_____________________________

Yes, I am a wonton hussy... and still sweet as 3.14

(in reply to Rochsub2009)
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RE: HOw do you balance the lifestyle and religious beli... - 5/9/2011 8:50:14 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline 		still no conflict with my religion.

In my upbringing premarital sex was only a sin when still virgins since you got married when you both <or at least the female> are virgins.

I admit I sinned before marriage but I did marry the man who I lost my virginity to so by the church's standards I was still ok since he married me.

I'm now a widow and my child is an adult and no longer technically under my care and thus I am basically an "elder" and pretty much in the free and clear as long as I'm not sleeping around.

And then if you read the Old Testament.....a man could have as many servants and have sex with them as he could afford.

So yup I'm still finding no conflict for me lol.


(in reply to sunshinemiss)
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RE: HOw do you balance the lifestyle and religious beli... - 5/9/2011 10:08:22 PM   
sunshinemiss


Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder
I admit I sinned before marriage but I did marry the man who I lost my virginity to so by the church's standards I was still ok since he married me.



But did you find it?


_____________________________

Yes, I am a wonton hussy... and still sweet as 3.14

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RE: HOw do you balance the lifestyle and religious beli... - 5/10/2011 12:20:23 AM   
crazyml


Posts: 5568
Joined: 7/3/2007
Status: offline 		Religion is a hard limit for me.

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Remember.... There's always somewhere on the planet where it's jackass o'clock.

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RE: HOw do you balance the lifestyle and religious beli... - 5/10/2011 2:39:13 AM   
AneNoz


Posts: 263
Joined: 4/26/2011
Status: offline 		My beliefs teach that sexual pleasure is a gift from My Goddess. Thus to engage in such practices that bring it about is a sacramental and holy act. It matters not if this practice is the simple missionary's form of coitus or the severe torture of a masochist by a sadist. By bringing forth the joy in all parties one engages in worship of the most fundamental form. Life is to be a pleasure, thus to engage in the sexual inclination with which one has been gifted by My Goddess is to fulfill, in part one's purpose: to find joy through the myriad acts of living, of which the psycho-sexual is most closely interwoven with The Great Mother of All. Within the framework of this, the "lifestyle" is a great good, and this is as it should be.

This is how I have been taught and this is how I believe.

Be at peace
Aneka

< Message edited by AneNoz -- 5/10/2011 2:40:41 AM >

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RE: HOw do you balance the lifestyle and religious beli... - 5/10/2011 6:47:03 AM   
DomImus


Posts: 2004
Joined: 3/17/2009
Status: offline 		I'm a heathen. No worries.

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"Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable." Sidney J. harris

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RE: HOw do you balance the lifestyle and religious beli... - 5/10/2011 8:05:37 AM   
lizi


Posts: 4673
Joined: 2/1/2009
Status: offline 		I'm not religious so no worries.

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