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RE: Deal Breakers a Deal Breaker? - 5/19/2011 11:17:29 AM   
xssve


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quote:

ORIGINAL: NuevaVida

Should we call them "Deal Preventers?"



I've decided Barry M is a deal breaker for me - unless you happen to be a fine ass, curvaceous Brunette...

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RE: Deal Breakers a Deal Breaker? - 5/19/2011 12:25:37 PM   
NuevaVida


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RE: Deal Breakers a Deal Breaker? - 5/19/2011 10:03:29 PM   
hausboy


Posts: 2360
Joined: 9/5/2010
Status: offline 		I'm a complete Harry Potter addict....and an absolute Manilow-hater....  but I have a total soft spot for the Carpenters. (and that's coming from a serious, hardcore Heavy Metal fanatic!)

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RE: Deal Breakers a Deal Breaker? - 5/19/2011 10:55:28 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		Using fast reply.......

Everybody has deal breakers.  Things they won't do.  Things that aren't acceptable. 

If you don't, you haven't looked hard enough.  You certainly haven't been a parent.  Beyond doubt, your imagination hasn't explored all of the possibilities.


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RE: Deal Breakers a Deal Breaker? - 5/20/2011 1:46:03 PM   
sexyred1


Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
Status: offline 		I am also wondering why there are alot of threads discussing deal breakers, or deal preventers.

I think many times, these threads are started to validate the preferences that the OP has, by asking others if it is ok not to like short, fat, tall, thin, blondes, redheads, etc.

Because otherwise, it is blindlingly obvious that if you really have a problem with something physical or mental when you meet someone, it will not go far enough for it to be a deal.

Other things, like someone lying to you, might happen later on, so that does become a deal breaker.

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RE: Deal Breakers a Deal Breaker? - 5/20/2011 3:25:24 PM   
LafayetteLady


Posts: 7683
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Northern New Jersey
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sunshinemiss


First time I heard this song, I cried like a baby. Heard it right after a funeral, and it just went "zing" right into my heart. Appropriately so.

best,
sunshine


I LOVE that song! And it is a tear jerker. This one One Voice is another of my favorites. This particular clip is not a great version, HOWEVER, I couldn't help but use this one because while Manilow talks about how he wrote it in a dream, he also mentions how his dreams typically include "handcuffs and Richard and Judy."

So scoff all you want at him, but the dude apparently is also a bit kinky!

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RE: Deal Breakers a Deal Breaker? - 5/20/2011 3:45:56 PM   
SnowRanger


Posts: 503
Joined: 5/25/2008
From: Sinsinnati
Status: offline 		One of my Deal-Breakers is people who sing songs written by Beach-Boys. Oh! By the way V.C., I don't feel old... Just seasoned!...

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RE: Deal Breakers a Deal Breaker? - 5/20/2011 4:26:43 PM   
SnowRanger


Posts: 503
Joined: 5/25/2008
From: Sinsinnati
Status: offline 		Hello A/all,

I have to say that this an interesting question at second glance.

First, let me state that I certainly respect the right of people to have preferences (height and hair color to use recent examples). Obviously, I also respect a person's right to seek out partners who meet that persons preferences. Now that I have established my open minded peachy keen-ness; I do have an observation about myself.

I try to avoid rigid thinking, dogmatic or otherwise closed minded people. Perhaps I am being unfair to people who harbor "Deal-Breakers;" but, I tend to such people as just that.

Had my preferences been "Deal-Breakers," I would have missed out on great experiences with a lot of wonderful people.

Well... That's what I think is up with that shit!

Respectfully,
Mike
SnowRanger

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RE: Deal Breakers a Deal Breaker? - 5/20/2011 10:34:07 PM   
xssve


Posts: 3589
Joined: 10/10/2009
Status: offline
quote:

Had my preferences been "Deal-Breakers," I would have missed out on great experiences with a lot of wonderful people.
Well put.

I have preferences, no question, I'm a sucker for a voluptuous Brunette, but I've never turned down a woman in need.

But I'm not even talking about just in here, it's everywhere, we're a very judgmental society, and judgmental over some pretty petty shit.

< Message edited by xssve -- 5/20/2011 10:35:09 PM >

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RE: Deal Breakers a Deal Breaker? - 5/21/2011 12:12:47 AM   
needlesandpins


Posts: 3901
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quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1

I am also wondering why there are alot of threads discussing deal breakers, or deal preventers.

I think many times, these threads are started to validate the preferences that the OP has, by asking others if it is ok not to like short, fat, tall, thin, blondes, redheads, etc.
Because otherwise, it is blindlingly obvious that if you really have a problem with something physical or mental when you meet someone, it will not go far enough for it to be a deal.

Other things, like someone lying to you, might happen later on, so that does become a deal breaker.


or it could just be that i enjoyed the convo at work, found it interesting and decided to bring it here too.

i've actually enjoyed the replies in my thread and the others. i'm not skeptical enough to view it your way i guess. i see it as people just being curious when they think about how they differ to others.

needles

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RE: Deal Breakers a Deal Breaker? - 5/21/2011 8:13:06 AM   
xssve


Posts: 3589
Joined: 10/10/2009
Status: offline 		I'll be honest, I didn't even read the threads, I was just riffin' off the titles, but like I say, it's culturewide phenomena: right clothes, right hairstyle, right car, etc., etc.

People just didn't worry nearly as much about that kind of shit when I was a kid, I think its a symptom of the whole consumer/media culture we're immersed in, we're confronted by fantasy ideals at every turn, told your self worth is dependent on what deodorant you use, or how big your tits are.

To be expected I suppose, it's all marketing, but while everybody is entitled to an opinion, making life altering decisions on the basis of something arbitrary like hair color strikes me as a bit AR/OC.

That's just my opinion, it's not my job to fix everybody.

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RE: Deal Breakers a Deal Breaker? - 5/23/2011 11:20:06 PM   
TheShrew


Posts: 519
Joined: 2/15/2009
From: The state I live in? Confusion.
Status: offline 		Sure, I could experience a deal breaker .. if there were an actual "deal" between myself and someone.
If it were a Dom who agreed to my hard limits then, in scene, went straight for my hard limit, this is a dealbreaker.
If it were a sub who agreed to the parameters then, in scene, began to top from the bottom, this is a deal breaker.
Generally, if someone succeeded or simply made an attempt to .. lie/ steal/ harm me etc... these are all deal breakers. Thankfully, I've never really found myself in this type of predicament because I take my time in both thought and action.
Anything else would not, for my part, be a deal breaker because any suspicious or displeasing factors {in advance} would prevent my having entered into a "deal" with that person in the first place.
All other factors pertaining to that other person are a matter of my personal preference.

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RE: Deal Breakers a Deal Breaker? - 5/24/2011 3:18:13 AM   
DeviantlyD


Posts: 4375
Joined: 5/26/2007
From: Hawai`i
Status: offline 		For those feelin' the pain of Barry Manilow songs, amongst others...go here to share it! *shameless plug for one of the threads I started* :D

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RE: Deal Breakers a Deal Breaker? - 5/24/2011 5:23:44 AM   
popularDemand


Posts: 228
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: xssve

I'll be honest

oh go on then, if you must.

pD

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Small talk stinks.

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RE: Deal Breakers a Deal Breaker? - 5/24/2011 5:31:45 AM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SnowRanger

Hello A/all,

I have to say that this an interesting question at second glance.

First, let me state that I certainly respect the right of people to have preferences (height and hair color to use recent examples). Obviously, I also respect a person's right to seek out partners who meet that persons preferences. Now that I have established my open minded peachy keen-ness; I do have an observation about myself.

I try to avoid rigid thinking, dogmatic or otherwise closed minded people. Perhaps I am being unfair to people who harbor "Deal-Breakers;" but, I tend to such people as just that.

Had my preferences been "Deal-Breakers," I would have missed out on great experiences with a lot of wonderful people.

Well... That's what I think is up with that shit!

Respectfully,
Mike
SnowRanger


But it isn't necessarily closed-mindedness. If you're allergic to smoke, then a person who smokes is a deal breaker. It really can be that simple. Not wanting to be rushed to the hospital with an asthma attack is important.

And preferences are things that don't matter to you all that much. You would prefer to get a roast beef sandwich but if they're all out, you'll get a turkey.  However if you got food poisoning from turkey once, and have a phobia about ever eating it again, then it isn't being petty to not order the turkey.

Same with what are to you preferences, they could be essential to someone else. Chemistry does matter if you plan to engage sexually with someone and if there isn't any, then that's a a deal breaker, even if why there isn't any is hair color or height or taste in music.


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RE: Deal Breakers a Deal Breaker? - 5/25/2011 6:10:21 AM   
xssve


Posts: 3589
Joined: 10/10/2009
Status: offline 		I'm not suggesting that one should stick it out in every case, in spite of gross incompatibility, Des, I was being somewhat facetious with the title.

But, it's a well known phenomena, recently in the media, that for some people, a bird in the hand is worth Two in the bush, so to speak, others spend their lives looking for the "perfect" mate.

Presumably "deal breakers" are things that prevent a "deal" from being consummated to begin with, it doesn't mean that once the deal is made, other incompatibilities cannot lead to renegotiation, or even that all deal breakers are absurd.

I was focusing on the more superficial traits being mentioned: height, hair color, etc.Sure, we prefer someone who shares our tastes and interests, but compatibility is really a thing that has to be tested - I don't care for country music, it makes me want to drink beer and mope around, but there is probably a country music fan out there that would be worth overcoming my prejudices for.


< Message edited by xssve -- 5/25/2011 6:13:09 AM >

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RE: Deal Breakers a Deal Breaker? - 5/25/2011 10:51:16 AM   
paulmcuk


Posts: 80
Joined: 4/16/2011
Status: offline 		Are CB radios a deal-breaker breaker?*





*You may need to have been alive in the 70s to understand this.

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RE: Deal Breakers a Deal Breaker? - 5/25/2011 12:08:28 PM   
tiggerspoohbear


Posts: 19141
Joined: 6/27/2010
Status: offline 		Breaker one-nine, breaker one-nine, it's been awhile since I've watched Smokey and the Bandit.  Breaker one-nine out.  

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RE: Deal Breakers a Deal Breaker? - 5/25/2011 1:49:25 PM   
xssve


Posts: 3589
Joined: 10/10/2009
Status: offline 		CB's are cool, it's what we had before the internet - but Smoky and the Bandit movies are a deal breaker, although I could probably sit through Convoy again.

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RE: Deal Breakers a Deal Breaker? - 5/25/2011 1:55:31 PM   
tiggerspoohbear


Posts: 19141
Joined: 6/27/2010
Status: offline 		But...but...but...Burt Reynolds and his schmexy hat, and Sally Fields?  It's still a movie I watch anytime it's on TV and I have just as much watching it for the 100th and some time as I did the first.  Same thing with "The Blues Brothers" and "National Lampoon's Animal House" or "Christmas Vacation".  O & most definitely can't forget Blazing Saddles. 


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"RABBIT IS GOOD, RABBIT IS WISE".

"I'm a baaa-aaad pussycat".


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