Scared of a kid I am ?

Join Our Community

Collarchat.com

Home Login Search

Scared of a kid I am ?

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Dungeon of Political and Religious Discussion >> Scared of a kid I am ?

Page: [1]

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

Scared of a kid I am ? - 6/6/2011 4:13:00 AM

Aneirin

Posts: 6121
Joined: 3/18/2006
From: Tamaris
Status: offline

What's this, I am apparently scared of a kid, a local kid about eight I would guess, who appears to be coming down to where I live and talking to me when I am outside building my bicycles with my cat nearby. He goes home and comes back to show me his bicycle which I can see from a glance though I am trying not to take an interest as I am feeling very uncomfortable, but I can see his bike is not set up for him and the braking leaves a lot to be desired. Now normally when I see a bike that can be quickly sorted I will do it for adults, but not this kid, no way, I am not getting involved.

This is ridiculous, I am actually scared of this little kid I want him to piss off, but I won't say it, so I leave my jobs to do and go inside to wait till he has gone which he does, but comes back again. A few days later he is back and playing with my cat, I can't go out, imprisoned by a little innocent kid.

Why am I like this, well, I am a single near middle aged male living alone, largely reclusive, unemployed and known locally as a bit of an oddball, long hair and my varying often outlandish mode of dress, definately not fitting into the conservative area in which I live, so I do not want to invite suspicion, as can one just imagine what little kid might say to parents even innocently if I should become friendly to little kid and had sorted out his bike, any contact can be mistrued and especially in this society we have bred, a society of distrust and anger seeking paedophiles on every street corner.

So, am I being paranoid, overly cautious or am I doing the right thing, are my uncomfortable feelings well founded or am I worrying about nothing ?

But what does this say about society, what have we become when it is at the forefront of one's mind that helping others, the young is strictly off limits because of fears of the rabid mentality within society. On thinking about this situation I remember myself doing very similar, ranging out from the house on my own or with friends and talking to strangers, so what the kid was doing was not so unusual from my memory, but unusual in that not many kids of that age are seen out on the streets these days, especially on this estate, although it is deemed as being a safe area.

Is it just my perception that society has gone wrong, or do others feel it too ?

As for the young, should they be ranging out from the house, or sitting in front of the tv or computer console where it is safe on a hot sunny day ?

_____________________________

Everything we are is the result of what we have thought, the mind is everything, what we think, we become - Guatama Buddha

Conservatism is distrust of people tempered by fear - William Gladstone

Profile

Post #: 1

RE: Scared of a kid I am ? - 6/6/2011 4:49:04 AM

calamitysandra

Posts: 1682
Joined: 3/17/2006
Status: offline

I am sorry that you feel this way, I can not tell you if it is justified, I don't know the community you are living in.
Maybe you could go over and say Hello to the parents, make yourself known, tell them what you have seen about the boys bike, ask if it is okay to help.

It is sad that children and adults are losing those important and beneficial options to socialise with each other more and more.Half of the village that is needed to raise a kid is afraid and therefore bows out.
The whole Stranger Danger business came with a bill that cost our society dearly.

I am happy to report that in my community, while reservations do crop up, the majority of interactions between adults and children are not jet so fraught with fear. This makes it possible for my children to have a variety of adults of both sexes in their lives, making them richer for it.
I don't want my kids to lose out on that, so I try to actively work against the sentiment that just about any male who shows interest in a child which is not his, is a predator just waiting to pounce.

_____________________________

"Whenever people are laughing, they are generally not killing one another"
Alan Alda

(in reply to Aneirin)

Profile

Post #: 2

RE: Scared of a kid I am ? - 6/6/2011 6:01:19 AM

SternSkipper

Posts: 7546
Joined: 3/7/2004
Status: offline

quote:

Maybe you could go over and say Hello to the parents, make yourself known, tell them what you have seen about the boys bike, ask if it is okay to help.

Speaking as a parent of two young ones myself, I agree with Sandra. The kid has obviously identified something he likes about you, so maybe speak with his folks (Dad first if possible, though that could just be me thinking about what worked best when I was married and raised them with a spouse). And if that works out, cool. If not you may have to say to the parent "could you have a talk with him, cause apparently we're both uncomfortable?'.
I am a big believer though that kids shouldn't fear every lone adult in their neighborhood. That's just not healthy.
Good Luck

(in reply to calamitysandra)

Profile

Post #: 3

RE: Scared of a kid I am ? - 6/6/2011 6:23:16 AM

Aneirin

Posts: 6121
Joined: 3/18/2006
From: Tamaris
Status: offline

Half of the problem is I believe because I have issues with communication, of the autistic spectrum variety, now I know this kid is perhaps wanting some company, he was after all on his own, but although I can relate to kids well, used to be a scout leader, I have none of my own and as an outsider looking in, my guess would be what's he upto, for there are some assholes living around here whom I keep one step ahead of most of the time, assholes as in interfering oldies that look down their nose at people like me whom they don't understand. Now because of this kid hanging around, I have informed my neighbours that I am uncomfortable with it but as to the parents, I know of them, the dad is an asshole, usually drunk and the mother is a scraggy mess with a vicious tongue so I am especially wary. My sense is to dissuade the kid from coming here, because I fear the society we have created, but it is very sad, for perhaps I was that kid at one time, my father being absent.

_____________________________

Everything we are is the result of what we have thought, the mind is everything, what we think, we become - Guatama Buddha

Conservatism is distrust of people tempered by fear - William Gladstone

(in reply to SternSkipper)

Profile

Post #: 4

RE: Scared of a kid I am ? - 6/6/2011 6:33:57 AM

kdsub

Posts: 12180
Joined: 8/16/2007
Status: offline

I think SternSkipper has the right idea but if you don’t want to do that then just ignore the child when he addresses you and keep your cat indoors for awhile… He will soon loose interest in you.

Butch

_____________________________

Mark Twain:

I don't see any use in having a uniform and arbitrary way of spelling words. We might as well make all clothes alike and cook all dishes alike. Sameness is tiresome; variety is pleasing

(in reply to Aneirin)

Profile

Post #: 5

RE: Scared of a kid I am ? - 6/6/2011 6:39:40 AM

willbeurdaddy

Posts: 11894
Joined: 4/8/2006
Status: offline

It's not society that has caused it, its the filth that blows in under the transom and has parents and authorities justifiably hypersensitive to any contact by strangers. Talking with the parents is a good step, but there isn't a chance in hell I would "befriend" this kid. Help with his bike as a one off, but don't become his buddy. It may be overly cautious and "paranoid" but one false accusation or even rumor outweighs anything he could get out of it.

_____________________________

Hear the lark
and harken
to the barking of the dogfox,
gone to ground.

(in reply to Aneirin)

Profile

Post #: 6

RE: Scared of a kid I am ? - 6/6/2011 6:46:45 AM

pahunkboy

Posts: 33061
Joined: 2/26/2006
From: Central Pennsylvania
Status: offline

The kids are out from school here.

I say hello to them, ask how they are.   I take my cat outside (holding her only-not on ground- as we are not doing fleas this year)    I let them pet the cat.

Being that I will chat like this- when there is an issue and there will be- with litter- my rant wont be tuned out- in the way it would be if I was a crazy old man.

Say hello to the kid- tell him his bike is cool.     Or a simply wave.    It can work out.

Being that I took this outlook- the lady in back did too. We compare notes. The old people who lived next doors- kids were playing with matches...   we nipped it in the bud pretty fast.

< Message edited by pahunkboy -- 6/6/2011 6:48:43 AM >

(in reply to willbeurdaddy)

Profile

Post #: 7

RE: Scared of a kid I am ? - 6/6/2011 6:55:58 AM

pahunkboy

Posts: 33061
Joined: 2/26/2006
From: Central Pennsylvania
Status: offline

An, I think you worry too much. Unless things are that different in the UK.

Kids have a short attention span...and will move on to the next task. Where do other kids live? Mention that you seen- some kids skateboarding on the next street over... something like that.

(in reply to pahunkboy)

Profile

Post #: 8

RE: Scared of a kid I am ? - 6/6/2011 7:06:11 AM

pahunkboy

Posts: 33061
Joined: 2/26/2006
From: Central Pennsylvania
Status: offline

..you stick to your property/premises area.

be flattered that you are a role model! you ROCK.

(in reply to pahunkboy)

Profile

Post #: 9