RE: Pain versus humiliation

Join Our Community

Collarchat.com

Home Login Search

RE: Pain versus humiliation

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive >> RE: Pain versus humiliation

Page: << < prev 1 [2]

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

RE: Pain versus humiliation - 8/6/2011 10:44:14 AM

Damacis

Posts: 45
Joined: 7/27/2011
Status: offline

Humiliation is much more profound -- but not as a means of discipline. On the contrary I find it immensely stimulating.

(in reply to phoenixmoonn13)

Profile

Post #: 21

RE: Pain versus humiliation - 8/6/2011 12:33:36 PM

coookie

Posts: 541
Joined: 10/25/2010
Status: offline

humiliation is a form of pain imo, it is just more like a mental pain. When used as a punishment i very much detest humiliation used because it throws me way off kilter and i become very unsure of my relationship where as physical pain almost validates that togetherness. I am not sure that i am explaining myself well here.

(in reply to Damacis)

Profile

Post #: 22

RE: Pain versus humiliation - 8/6/2011 12:50:09 PM

paulmcuk

Posts: 80
Joined: 4/16/2011
Status: offline

Tough one. Couldn't choose between them really. I don't like pain but I love that it demonstrates the Domme's superiority because she is in a position to inflict something I dislike on me. Humiliation plays on my inate sense of inferiority to the Domme and brings it to new heights (or lows).

(in reply to AFreeMan)

Profile

Post #: 23

RE: Pain versus humiliation - 8/13/2011 2:54:04 PM

UberBrat

Posts: 45
Joined: 5/14/2011
Status: offline

For me, either humiliation or pain would work as a punishment, but not so much because of the pain or humiliation itself, more because of the fact that I knew it was a punishment.
On the rare ocassions when I have done something wrong, knowing that he is angry or annoyed with me, or even worse disappointed, is a worse punishment than anything else that could happen; and he knows that.

(in reply to phoenixmoonn13)

Profile

Post #: 24

RE: Pain versus humiliation - 8/13/2011 3:38:19 PM

UniqueRaven

Posts: 1237
Joined: 9/30/2009
From: Austin, TX
Status: offline

Pain. I tend to be hard to humiliate.

I'm not a masochist, so intense pain is not fun for me (I do love spankings and biting and things like that).

But for me the ultimate punishment is - his disappointment.

_____________________________

"My life has no purpose, no direction, no aim, no meaning, and yet I'm happy. I can't figure it out. What am I doing right?" ~Snoopy (Charles Schultz)

My blog is at http://takinghishand.wordpress.com

(in reply to UberBrat)

Profile

Post #: 25

RE: Pain versus humiliation - 8/13/2011 4:52:43 PM

TheShrew

Posts: 519
Joined: 2/15/2009
From: The state I live in? Confusion.
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: AFreeMan
Which has a more profound effect upon you? Pain or humiliation?

Pain. I have fairly thick skin and try hard not to allow people to provoke me to a point where they govern the emotion I feel.

quote:

ORIGINAL: AFreeMan
Which do you think is a more effective form of discipline?

Depends on the sub/slave.
If your sub/slave is a maso .. pain may not be the best tool of discipline.
If your sub/slave is into hum .. hum may not be the best tool of discipline.
If your sub/slave is into both .. neither may be the best tool of discipline.
If you have a sensitive sub/slave .. a look, or a whisper may be all it takes to break them.

_____________________________

.. and those who were seen dancing were thought to be insane by those who could not hear the music ..

Snark ~ Just another free service I generously provide.

(in reply to AFreeMan)

Profile

Post #: 26

RE: Pain versus humiliation - 8/13/2011 6:53:34 PM

experiment2

Posts: 208
Joined: 11/7/2007
Status: offline

for me humiliation leave a greater impression. i get resentful and angry at being belittled. i know it sounds illogical but being one who enjoys pain at times it can almost seem like a reward.

as far as discipline goes i think humiliation leave more of an impression.

as a submissive i craved praise and compliments from my Mistress. pleasing Her was what i strived for and any humiliation was the total opposite of what i tried to show her.

(in reply to phoenixmoonn13)

Profile

Post #: 27

RE: Pain versus humiliation - 8/16/2011 9:56:38 PM

lupineEleven

Posts: 31
Joined: 3/5/2011
Status: offline

For me, pain is a heckovalot better than humiliation, purely because most forms of humiliation have extremely detrimental affects on my psyche. Pain I enjoy, to a certain point.

For discipline, humiliation would honestly ring out to me like a child getting angry and calling someone else names because they didn't get what they wanted. If Master tried to humiliate me as discipline or punishment for a wrongdoing I would not learn from it, I would instead be deeply hurt, lash out in anger at his childish behavior, and there would be a great many things to repair before things could return to normal - IF they could ever return to normal. Having dealt with abusive relationships that kept me controlled by playing on my self-worth (ie humiliating me), trying to use humiliating techniques to control me would at this point in my life, make me quite impossible to control, if not violent.

What Master uses for discipline is lectures... I hate lectures, they make me feel bad, they're boring, and he points out truths that I would rather overlook in them. After the lecture we discuss what needs to be done to fix the issue, and then, yes, Master will use pain (we have this 'special' cane that is the bad-girl stick just for these occasions) to mark the end of the punishment and we move on. The pain at the end is like a breath of fresh air, or a shot of caffeine, or something shocking basically, that feels good and bad at the same time, bad because it's as a punishment thus that mindset is there, but also relaxing because of the fact that I am a little bit of a painslut.

As for PLAY discipline or Funishment... humiliation of some forms are fun (slut, whore, harlot, etc... embarrassing but not degrading scenarios are fun), but overall much of it is still detrimental to me and as such is usually avoided. We're more into a bit of pain and a lot of force.

_____________________________

Once called WolfyMontgomery. Master changed my name! ;P
Fear my awesome scary metal chompers of DOOM!!

DumDoms... yummy =D

(in reply to experiment2)

Profile

Post #: 28

RE: Pain versus humiliation - 8/16/2011 10:09:25 PM

MrSprocket

Posts: 85
Joined: 8/10/2011
From: Cyberspace
Status: offline

I tend to be incapable of being humiliated and belittled. I tend to laugh and belittle right back.

Pain on the other hand is a different story. Pain is my preference for the sole purpose of becoming stronger. My arousal is an acceptable byproduct.

_____________________________

I am a meat popsicle.

(in reply to lupineEleven)

Profile

Post #: 29

RE: Pain versus humiliation - 8/16/2011 10:29:54 PM

Aynne88

Posts: 3873
Joined: 8/29/2008
Status: offline

I think for some of us humiliation has a different meaning and a different outcome. I tend to get haughty and can be quite a bitch at times and for me, some humiliation has a very centering effect. It can also be hot as hell to be pushed into that shameful erotic zone of doing something I hate yet winding up craving it and being a wet begging mess by the end of it. Humiliation done right takes a very clever touch, and can take me further into a mental headspace than any pain can ever do. I'm pretty hard to mentally fuck with so when it's accomplished correctly I love being humiliated. Yum.

_____________________________

As long as people will shed the blood of innocent creatures there can be no peace, no liberty, no harmony between people. Slaughter and justice cannot dwell together.
—Isaac Bashevis Singer, writer and Nobel laureate (1902–1991)

(in reply to MrSprocket)

Profile

Post #: 30

RE: Pain versus humiliation - 8/17/2011 4:28:45 AM

sunshinemiss

Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
Status: offline

quote:

I tend to get haughty and can be quite a bitch at times

Get outta town!

_____________________________

Yes, I am a wonton hussy... and still sweet as 3.14

(in reply to Aynne88)

Profile

Post #: 31

RE: Pain versus humiliation - 8/17/2011 5:18:36 AM

Aynne88

Posts: 3873
Joined: 8/29/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: sunshinemiss

quote:

I tend to get haughty and can be quite a bitch at times

Get outta town!

lol...cheeky little thing aren't ya?

!

_____________________________

As long as people will shed the blood of innocent creatures there can be no peace, no liberty, no harmony between people. Slaughter and justice cannot dwell together.
—Isaac Bashevis Singer, writer and Nobel laureate (1902–1991)

(in reply to sunshinemiss)

Profile

Post #: 32

RE: Pain versus humiliation - 8/17/2011 5:41:28 AM

sunshinemiss

Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
Status: offline

quote:

lol...cheeky little thing aren't ya? !

... says the queen of understatement. Haughty, indeed!

_____________________________

Yes, I am a wonton hussy... and still sweet as 3.14

(in reply to Aynne88)

Profile

Post #: 33

RE: Pain versus humiliation - 8/17/2011 6:31:52 AM

myotherself

Posts: 7157
Joined: 3/9/2006
From: The cold bit of the UK
Status: offline

If we've been apart for a while, sometimes I forget exactly what position I hold in the relationship. He uses humiliation to remind me of the position I begged for, and for that I'm always grateful.

If I'm in a pissy mood and don't mind my tongue, he'll also use humiliation to remind me to shut up and behave, lol

Punishments always involve pain though. We do talk about the issues, We discuss the problem, and I will explain to him why I was wrong and apologise, and then I will take the punishment. I prefer it this way because otherwise I will brood on the issue and I find I'm still brooding and wondering if I'm forgiven long after he's put the problem behind him. This way we put a very definite full stop to the problem and I find I can move on much easier.

_____________________________

There's nowt so queer as folk

(in reply to sunshinemiss)

Profile

Post #: 34

RE: Pain versus humiliation - 8/17/2011 6:32:17 AM

stoni23

Posts: 178
Joined: 1/14/2010
Status: offline

I've never been humiliated as a form of punishment. I've been ordered to sing silly songs in front of strangers (kink-minded, but strangers nonetheless), cross dress in public, have painted toenails in public, have a silly green sparkly kid's dragon glue on tattoo thing on the back of my neck in public, carry around a silly little strawberry doll, but never humiliated as a form of discipline.

It's always been pain for me, which has been affective. Although, come to think of it, I never really did anything to deserve the discipline to begin with lol.

_____________________________

Aren't we all just a little bit fake and a lot real?

(in reply to sunshinemiss)

Profile

Post #: 35