RE: The Voice of a Dom

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RE: The Voice of a Dom - 7/28/2011 4:58:37 PM

leadership527

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Giermo
First post, thought I start off with a problem I face when being a dominant.

Agreed, but you aren't looking at the right problem. It's kind of fascinating that I was just having this discussion with someone else. You are busy looking at externals... the pitch of your voice in this case. It doesn't matter. Nor does it matter how tall you are, how straight your shoulders are, or any other external sign. Dominance starts on the inside. It's an attitude. If you have "it" then it will be conveyed without you worrying about it. Nobody actually has to "learn" body language and very few people mistake body language when they see it... at least not serious body language.

When I'm in a "don't fuck with me" mood, I don't need to open my mouth at all and it communicates quite nicely.

I could only see your voice problem being an issue if the relationship was entirely over the phone and even then I'm skeptical.

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I didn't so much "enslave" Carol as I did "enlove" her. - Me
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Post #: 61

RE: The Voice of a Dom - 7/30/2011 4:03:27 AM

Awareness

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Giermo

First post, thought I start off with a problem I face when being a dominant.

This is the first problem I can see right here. Dominant is something you are, not something you turn on and off. People don't "be dominant", they simply are and it often finds expression in a scene or interplay with a sub or slave.

quote:

I believe I lack a deep commanding voice. My voice is not high pitched but I feel that a proper voice is needed for making commands. In none of my previous BDSM relationship as this been brought up but it is something that concerns me from time to time.

A deep voice is a natural advantage which has the potential to hit the right note in a sub or slave, however it pretty much accentuates and enhances what you're doing, it doesn't provide the power which drives it.

The power derives from the mind and character of the individual behind it. In my experience, there are two fundamental aspects which are going to drive unconscious submission in a heterosexual woman. The first is your display of affect. Your demeanour, tone, body language and so on. Unconscious outer expressions of your inner self-belief.

The second is your display of character. The degree to which your actions match your words. Your sense of self-discipline, the standards you set for yourself and others. And so on. The first gives rise to an indication you could be the real deal. The second tends to confirm it.

If you want an example of someone who dominates without a deep voice, I suggest you consider the late Edward Woodward. His work in Callan and The Equaliser both contain examples which will give you an idea of how effective this can be.

However, I'd suggest you should be focusing on the inner qualities which exemplify a dominant, not be concerned with outer expressions of dominance. Such things flow naturally when your inner self is in order.

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Post #: 62

RE: The Voice of a Dom - 8/3/2011 8:15:47 PM

ResidentSadist

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~fr
I agree that a good voice helps. Even most vanillas obey me when I issue a command.
But . . . so does being wealthy, having huge cock and holding a position of power in business or politics.
However, you don't need all those things to be dominant or commanding.

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Post #: 63

RE: The Voice of a Dom - 8/4/2011 2:49:34 AM

PeonForHer

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OP,

You don't need a voice like Barry White's. (When he begins a song it sounds like someone starting up a tractor in the morning.) What you *do* need, though, is a rasping voice. Like a Wimbledon umpire. Me, I've practised my Wimbledon-umpire 'Quiet, please' and have silenced whole parties full of students at times. Works a treat.

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Post #: 64

RE: The Voice of a Dom - 8/4/2011 2:53:18 AM

PeonForHer

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Awareness
If you want an example of someone who dominates without a deep voice, I suggest you consider the late Edward Woodward. His work in Callan and The Equaliser both contain examples which will give you an idea of how effective this can be.x

Just as an aside, that voice never worked at home for Edward Woodward. I know one of his sons - Tim: he and and his brother used to refer to him as Ed Fart-in-the-Bath. (You know, Ed -'wood-wood-wood').

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Post #: 65

RE: The Voice of a Dom - 8/5/2011 3:47:09 PM

CynthiaWVirginia

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From: West Virginia, USA
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quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsholly

quote:

Now if you sounded like a chipmunk... that would be a problem for some.

i can just hear Alvin bellowing "On your knees. bitch!"

Oh gawd that would be too funny!

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Post #: 66

RE: The Voice of a Dom - 8/5/2011 10:58:00 PM

mistudeMM

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To me it's not about the voice itself, but what it's saying...it doesn't matter if you don't sound "domly" because when a girl is interested in you for domination it's you, how you talk to her, what you say, the tone (no matter the natural pitch) is what (at least in my opinion) a girl will recognize.

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Post #: 67