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agirl -> RE: True submissive? (7/14/2011 12:40:14 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Wretchedness
quote:
I don't need to flaunt anything and give anyone a free show to prove a thing. And neither should you.
I understand what you're saying. It's more something I do for me. To get over myself. I would never post a pussy shot. Last month I walk through my fear and went and had my nips pierced. I was pretty proud of myself for doing it. It was something I had always wanted to do, but thought I would never have the courage to. I even went alone. It probably doesn't seem like that big or a deal to most, but it was something I struggled with. I believe if I try and stay out of my comfort zone with things I have problems with (slowly on my terms) then it helps me overcome it little by little.
This guy has been really nice to me, we have talked for a little while and we have talked on the phone. I do find him interesting and like a lot of his core beliefs. But there is still something that is unsettling. And knowing that I am shy and do tend to run away, I want to be sure I’m not mind-f**king myself out of a good thing. But I guess the bottom line is I can’t show up in public the way he wants me to dress.
I can understand this very well. I've known my chap/boss-bloke for many years, well over a decade.......and I have to be honest, unless he pushed me I'd still be surrounded by my lovely comfy buffers. I like change and struggle to be at MY pace, not someone else's..............but here I am with a bloke that has just spent 4 days shoving me arse-first through things I'd need days, on my own, to even process.( not D/s stuff...)
I also try to keep myself out of my comfort-zone, and to be frank, it's doesn't matter one jot whether it's a breeze for anyone else. We all have our own little victories. There are plenty of things I've done ON MY OWN that are pushing my comfort-levels to the max, but I'm in control, making myself do them........Still tricky, but less tricky than someone ELSE deciding that *now's the time*.
It's all too easy to misinterpret and get things a little skewiff before you've spent a bit of time together face to face. D/s can be super and clearly plenty of people attest to that fact.......butyou really haven't come across an unusual reticence, considering you don't know the chap that well.
Quick anicdote from the mists of time...... When I was about to meet M for the first time he told me to wear * whatever makes you comfortable. Be yourself, because that's who I want to meet*......Yeah, he made me do all sorts of uncomfy things after a while but he wanted to see and know who he had grown to like when we FIRST met up for a drink. The first times we met were the building blocks of why I'm still with him.
I think your pics might show someone that is a little more *ready to go* than you might realise. Not everyone grasps that people are multi-faceted.
And in addition.........I would give a *free-show* and have, for M and because of M.....but we both come out smiling. Getting all uncomfy and stressed about this stuff HAS to have a mutual benefit....WHATEVER that may be. Otherwise, why stay?
agirl
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