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Did I f**k up? - 5/19/2006 8:43:33 AM

Rumtiger

Posts: 2634
Joined: 3/4/2006
From: Vegas
Status: offline

I need the help of a mistress....or rather any lifestyle woman for this, I dunno if i'm being just a paranoid bastard or if I really did do something wrong. I amanged to talk to a certian someone, just first contact and all, where did we live in the city, then she asked me what sort of things I was into...here is what my reply was:

"Not as far as most people I've ever talked to lol. As for what i'm into, well i'm pretty open to be honost, and have a good pain threshold i've been told, though I think thats only because I try to resist the pain as much as possible, while the typical submission theme is always fun, the things I absolutly love are primal play [it's tough to find anyone else really into it], queening, but I see it as a bit different then most, and a few misc. things here and there besides a huge leather/latex fetish, it's actually a pretty long list, really the big limits I have are just anything sharp, so no knife or needle play for me. Virtually everything else is fine though.

Of course if you ment what things outside the lifestyle I like, then first let me apologize for being an ass with my previous answer lol. I love martial arts, been practicing for a good 9 years now....umm, ussualy just chilling, maybe put a little rock on, go out to the strip here and there, and i'll be doing some work on my car soon, I had to send it to California for a little bit to get it fixed, I should be getting it back in a month or two...dont worry its not one of those "oh its at the shop" stories lol, right now i'm driving around a stupid Sentra until it gets back within a month or so....hate that car. lol. Lets see...I'm a pretty good cook, particularly italian food [making some sauce as we speak], and thats just about most of what I can think of lol. I'm pretty sure more will come out the more we talk, I scare myself sometimes with what I know about when the time is appropriate, hehe.

As for the phone number dont worry about it, I'm exactly the same way, the phone is a pretty big step for meeting people online.

So how about you _______? what are some of your favorite things?

David. "

I havent heard from her in a long while and a quick second email wasent acknowledged, whereas before we had been practically chatting by mail...so.....did I fuck up? What can I change in my communication that I dont screw up again?

_____________________________

Fuck the Pandas!
-Moi

Mmm, I love me some kickboxers, you know why? Cause ya'll cant take a punch!
- Quentin Tarantino.

If they cant take a joke, fuck em.
-Tucker Max

Post #: 1

RE: Did I f**k up? - 5/19/2006 8:57:32 AM

ShiftedJewel

Posts: 2492
Joined: 12/2/2004
Status: offline

I don't see that you screwed up at all. Maybe something came up and she hasn't had the opportunity to get back to you. Ok, so I'm a dedicated optimist.

Jewel

_____________________________

Don't ask, trust me, you won't like the answer... no one ever does.

(in reply to Rumtiger)

Post #: 2

RE: Did I f**k up? - 5/19/2006 9:03:06 AM

MochaMistress

Posts: 275
Joined: 1/8/2006
Status: offline

I see nothing wrong with your reply either. Beats the oneliners and the nude photos I've been getting.

(in reply to Rumtiger)

Post #: 3

RE: Did I f**k up? - 5/19/2006 9:08:34 AM

kittensmailbox

Posts: 744
Joined: 1/7/2005
From: Youngstown, Ohio
Status: offline

Rumtiger, {great name by the way} i did NOT see anything wrong with your reply at all... It was very open and honest... So ppl are just rude, i wouldnt worry about it... move on...

_____________________________

~softly smiles

~lowers her eyes in respect~

~kitten

(in reply to MochaMistress)

Post #: 4

RE: Did I f**k up? - 5/19/2006 9:10:58 AM

Rumtiger

Posts: 2634
Joined: 3/4/2006
From: Vegas
Status: offline

Just to clarify, this is about the 5th email between me and her....

hm..::just goes and puts his head down::

_____________________________

Fuck the Pandas!
-Moi

Mmm, I love me some kickboxers, you know why? Cause ya'll cant take a punch!
- Quentin Tarantino.

If they cant take a joke, fuck em.
-Tucker Max

(in reply to kittensmailbox)

Post #: 5

RE: Did I f**k up? - 5/19/2006 9:11:36 AM

angelface183

Posts: 688
Joined: 4/12/2006
Status: offline

David,

May I be a bitch? You reply is great. It is honest, straight forward, and shows your personality, but your spelling sucks. I am sorry, but I am stickler for that, maybe she is, too.

Then again, you may not have been the only person that she was chatting with and she had an opportunity to meet someone else.

Perhaps things when awry at work and she hasn't been able to contact you.

Maybe her aunt died.

Maybe it has absolutely nothing to do with anything that you said or didn't say.

Keep the faith. I have a read a lot of your posts and you seem like a fun guy who has a lot to offer the right lady. Maybe she is not the right one.

Kim

(in reply to MochaMistress)

Post #: 6

RE: Did I f**k up? - 5/19/2006 9:13:48 AM

Rumtiger

Posts: 2634
Joined: 3/4/2006
From: Vegas
Status: offline

Me justa dun go to gud with mah edjumacation...

_____________________________

Fuck the Pandas!
-Moi

Mmm, I love me some kickboxers, you know why? Cause ya'll cant take a punch!
- Quentin Tarantino.

If they cant take a joke, fuck em.
-Tucker Max

(in reply to angelface183)

Post #: 7

RE: Did I f**k up? - 5/19/2006 9:16:46 AM

angelface183

Posts: 688
Joined: 4/12/2006
Status: offline

That's okay sweetie, I am sure you have other skills! LOL

(Sorry, spelling is just a pet peve of mine. At work, I am constantly correcting my technician's notes so that the customers take them seriously. Some of the techs are truly brilliant and gifted, they just can't spell! No big woop; I'll take care of it!)

(in reply to Rumtiger)

Post #: 8

RE: Did I f**k up? - 5/19/2006 9:18:35 AM

MistressWolfen

Posts: 578
Joined: 6/20/2005
Status: offline

Your response was fine Rumtiger, nowt the matter with it at all.

_____________________________

Quoth the raven

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Post #: 9

RE: Did I f**k up? - 5/19/2006 9:37:50 AM

MHOO314

Posts: 3628
Joined: 9/26/2004
Status: offline

Things happen at times---life does intervene---as for the spelling--good or bad aside does not IMHO preclude a note IF the One is available--keep trying.

_____________________________

SLUTS: Southern Ladies Under Tremendous Stress...

Mistress Hathor

(in reply to Rumtiger)

Post #: 10

RE: Did I f**k up? - 5/19/2006 9:40:57 AM

Rumtiger

Posts: 2634
Joined: 3/4/2006
From: Vegas
Status: offline

mm..shes been on rather regularly since this, looking back on the the main site now she was on just 25 minutes ago...so...dont really think something came up...

.....blah.

_____________________________

Fuck the Pandas!
-Moi

Mmm, I love me some kickboxers, you know why? Cause ya'll cant take a punch!
- Quentin Tarantino.

If they cant take a joke, fuck em.
-Tucker Max

(in reply to MHOO314)

Post #: 11

RE: Did I f**k up? - 5/19/2006 9:47:29 AM

LadyJulieAnn

Posts: 979
Joined: 6/29/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Rumtiger

mm..shes been on rather regularly since this, looking back on the the main site now she was on just 25 minutes ago...so...dont really think something came up...

.....blah.

Perhaps she just wasn't used to someone who knew what he wanted and was able to communicate on a level that went beyond "I am a worm. Use me.". I think you did fine. She obviously had other plans, but didn't have the courtesy to let you know. Unfortunately, that happens a lot on here. Don't let it get you down.

Best of luck in your future search,
Julie

(in reply to Rumtiger)

Post #: 12

RE: Did I f**k up? - 5/19/2006 9:54:09 AM

champagnewishes

Posts: 1310
Joined: 10/31/2005
From: Orange County
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: angelface183

(Sorry, spelling is just a pet peve of mine...)

Maybe it should become a pet peeve instead...

David...you were open, honest and insightful with your email. That's all one can do. The rest is out of your hands so stop beating yourself up over it. I had a similiar situation occur recently and i called Him on it. His response was "no excuse"...which i felt was excuse enough to not waste any more of my time.

_____________________________

Nirvana cannot be described, it is only understood truly by a person who has experienced it.

(in reply to angelface183)

Post #: 13

RE: Did I f**k up? - 5/19/2006 9:58:50 AM

angelface183

Posts: 688
Joined: 4/12/2006
Status: offline

LOL
Thank you champagnewishes for pointing out my error...I never said I was perfect, just trying my best (pretty peeved at myself right now though

)

David,
I don't think that you did anything wrong. Apparently she is not the right girl for whatever reason. You sounded delightful and charming in your reply to her. It is HER loss. Don't let it be yours.

(in reply to champagnewishes)

Post #: 14

RE: Did I f**k up? - 5/19/2006 10:30:38 AM

LadyJC

Posts: 111
Joined: 5/18/2005
Status: offline

As everyone else said on here, your email was very open and you actually set out your limits and what you like and dislike in the BDSM lifestyle and in vanilla. Which is suprising because usually I have to ask specifically for both or else I get one and not the other.
Hell if it weren't for the fact that you lived so far away I'd probably try and snatch ya up. I read your profile and you're very open and honest. Oh distance can be so annoying.
Don't worry about her, I'm sure someone else will come up.
Lady JC

(in reply to angelface183)

Post #: 15

RE: Did I f**k up? - 5/19/2006 10:47:38 AM

LadyHugs

Posts: 2299
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

Dear Rumtiger,

I don't see anything wrong. Its English and understood as far as I can see.

I see if I were interested, I couldn't play with my knives and axe on you but, that is ok, I have plenty of other toys in my bag....

But, I can tell you first hand--that, life interrupts. My parent had a heart attack and I was so in a rush for the two weeks after it, going to and from the hospital and released, died 4 hours later at home, rushed again with death reports, burial and such. Might not be as dramatic in her case but, I would have taken a breath of a moment to say-can't talk, emergency on my end, will get back to you.

Some have vacations and gosh what else. Take a breath, be yourself and if it isn't to be--perhaps the next one comes will be even better.

Respectfully submitted,
Lady Hugs

(in reply to Rumtiger)

Post #: 16

RE: Did I f**k up? - 5/19/2006 10:48:22 AM

Proprietrix

Posts: 756
Joined: 7/15/2005
From: Ohio/West Virginia
Status: offline

I don't think you said anything wrong. Maybe she got to know you enough to think "hmmm, we're just not compatible." and doesn't know how to break it to you, so she's using silence as an answer. It's not unheard of online.
You might try emailing her again in a few weeks, and still if no response, take the hint, and walk away. I'm not saying it's a polite way to give the hint, but maybe it's the only way she knows how.
It might not have anything at all to do with you. Maybe she's depressed. Maybe she's reorganizing her stance on the lifestyle. Maybe she's decided to become a sub. Maybe, maybe, maybe... We can never know what's going through someone else's mind. Let those remain *her* maybes. If you take it personally, it'll eat away at you and you'll start posting threads wondering what you did wrong

_____________________________

IMO, IMHO, YMMV, AFAIK, to me, I see it as, from my perspective, it's been my experience, I only speak for myself, (and all other disclaimers here).

(in reply to Rumtiger)

Post #: 17

RE: Did I f**k up? - 5/19/2006 11:01:16 AM

champagnewishes

Posts: 1310
Joined: 10/31/2005
From: Orange County
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: angelface183

LOL
Thank you champagnewishes for pointing out my error...I never said I was perfect, just trying my best (pretty peeved at myself right now though)

Thank you for taking it with the humor it was intended...and i won't tell anyone you aren't perfect.....

_____________________________

Nirvana cannot be described, it is only understood truly by a person who has experienced it.

(in reply to angelface183)

Post #: 18

RE: Did I f**k up? - 5/19/2006 11:27:59 AM

LaTigresse

Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline

Rumtiger, If it helps at all I will add one more. Your response was wonderful! It said alot about you as an individual and that is what I am always looking for in communication to me.
I know rejection is a crappy thing especially when someone does it the way she apparently has. Even I get my wittle feelings hurt when every available lesbian submissive is not prostrating themselves at my tennis shoe clad feet. BUT, look at it the way I try to, that is one less you have to deal with before you find the right one. And, thank god it was only after 5 emails instead of 25 or whatever makes you feel a little better.....( I am going for the "bright side" concept here) Obviously she was not right for you and now you get to find the woman that is.

(in reply to champagnewishes)

Post #: 19

RE: Did I f**k up? - 5/19/2006 12:06:33 PM

thetammyjo

Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline

I think its a lovely and honest reply. You are a real person in this reply.

That may be the problem.

While dom women complain about others wanting a fantasy or not being honest, the objective reality is that some dom women are exactly the same way. Maybe she's looking for a fantasy and your reality burst it? If so, I say better to learn that now than a bit later on when losing contact will hurt more.

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to Rumtiger)

Post #: 20

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