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RE: Safe Sex -- Does Anyone NOT Practice It? - 1/3/2012 10:41:17 PM

tj444

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quote:

ORIGINAL: kfaith88
Honestly, if a guy didn't want to use a condomn, or was insulted that I insisted on one, that tells me all I need to know. I live in the real world, and there is noo way to tell if someone is 'clean' other than testing. So I need a condom, and your health card please :)

Personally, for me, a guy would have to do both (tests every 6 months & use condoms) until we have been living together for a while and i feel he is trustworthy enough to take the risk to go without condoms.. But only if he submits to regular polygraph testing ..

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Post #: 61

RE: Safe Sex -- Does Anyone NOT Practice It? - 1/4/2012 12:15:00 AM

Casteele

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From: Near Sacramento, California, USA
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FR

Responsible Sex (I dislike the term "safe sex" because it's a misleading misnomer) is not just about wearing a condom, and I think those which think that is all it is are either fools deluding themselves that using one is "safe", or those who want to abolish any need for personal self-responsibility and just want to be able to blame the other party if something goes wrong. Just as the act of sex itself takes two, so does the act of responsible sex. (Ignoring quips of three-somes and more-somes, or masturbation :-P) And I'm not talking about those who say "no glove, no love," that's still placing all the burden and responsibility of one to ensure safety and responsibility. However, "we've been dating exclusively for six months now and you've shown yourself to be trustworthy and responsible.. I'll show you mine if you show me yours--STD test results, that is!" is responsible.

That said.. I don't usually wear a condom because I don't usually need to--I'm extremely selective with my partners when it comes to swapping any fluids beyond massage oils and pennzoil. I'm reasonably sure that my current partner is clean, even though she's been passed around from one guy to another on the back of a truck or two in her long journey here from Missouri. Isn't she cute?

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Post #: 62

RE: Safe Sex -- Does Anyone NOT Practice It? - 1/4/2012 1:47:09 AM

DaddySatyr

Posts: 9381
Joined: 8/29/2011
From: Pittston, Pennsyltucky
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quote:

ORIGINAL: gorgeoushair
Believe it or not, there are those who are not sexually monogomous, have multiple sex partners, and do not practice safe sex.

For example, i cannot believe that, in this day and age, that any man would not wear a latex condom when any kind of penetration is involved (not that this is absolutely foolproof, but the best we have so far). Yet, i hear of men (still) not wanting to wear a condom, and indirectly blaming their partner for insisting on it, by complaining of the lack of sensation. i thought that kind of thinking and complaining went out after the advent of the AIDS epidemic in the 1980's. Look, we know there is less sensation. Sorry. We did not invent STD's or AIDS. We do not want to contract those diseases. Thank you for wearing a condom. Comments?

First off; there are some that are allergic to latex and find the act of putting lambskin on their intimate parts to be something that runs akin to a subject that violates TOS.

I was very sexually active and promiscuous in the 80s and there is no doubt I dodged a bullet. I lived a lifestyle that was begging for an STD infection. I had crabs, twice. Once because a girlfriend wore the pants of a slutty girlfriend of hers without washing them and once, litterally, because they were crawling on a bar where I was resting my arm and my other arm and my head and ... okay! I was passed out on the bar! Are we happy? LOL)

I have the CDC website saved in my browser favorites and I am constantly reading there. Were you aware that the "testing window" for HIV/AIDS is down to three weeks; NOT six months? Lance mentioned something very relevent: There are three cases of oral transmission on record. One study I read about involved a bunch of people who were tested for presents of the disease in their mouths and they tested negative. Some died within weeks of having been tested. I have been saying for years that saliva kills the infection.

I'm also old enough to remember some news reports about the Chinese having a cure (I believe it was cvalled GKQ-23). They were using it, widely with great results. Our FDA needed "further testing" and we never heard about it, again (I've always believed that HIV/AIDS was a government biological warfare experiment gone horribly wrong, anyway).

I am not recommending standing on street corners and having sex with random people (nor employing the services of those that do) and I don't consider myself a thrill-seeker. I take time to get to know a person and am as convinced as I can be that sex with them will not end or significantly change my life in any way before sex happens.

I'd like to say that I get tested every month when I'm not in a serious relstionship but, as ugly as I am, that would imply that I "get lucky" when I'm not in a relationship and that would be lying. The truth is: random sex holds no appeal for me.

So, to answer your direct question more directly: I am most definitely not an idiot and the last time I used a condom was so long ago ... (Can anyone remember the phrase: "I have sinned in my heart"?)

I might also point out that, technically, my stuffing my winky into a lady's mouth is "penetration" and while some ladies may insist on protection when that is happening, I know few men who would opt for it (or be at very much risk).

Peace and comfort,

Michael

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Post #: 63

RE: Safe Sex -- Does Anyone NOT Practice It? - 1/4/2012 3:39:08 AM

LillyoftheVally

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quote:

ORIGINAL: DaddySatyr
First off; there are some that are allergic to latex

http://www.condomusa.com/8g07-condom.asp

To the OP. My partner and I do not use condoms, though I am sexually monogomous. Before him I did use condoms with most partners (not with oral sex, ever though)

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Post #: 64

RE: Safe Sex -- Does Anyone NOT Practice It? - 1/4/2012 7:00:37 AM

thedavezone

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From: South Korea
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While we're on the subject, if you have a lack of sensation, try a different condom. Every condom is different, every person is different, so you'll just have to keep on trying.

(in reply to gorgeoushair)

Post #: 65

RE: Safe Sex -- Does Anyone NOT Practice It? - 1/4/2012 7:04:17 AM

hlen5

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quote:

ORIGINAL: HisPet21

Don't be silly! Wrap your willy!

Don't be a dick! Cover your prick!

Wrap that rascal!

No glove, no love!

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Post #: 66

RE: Safe Sex -- Does Anyone NOT Practice It? - 1/4/2012 7:22:10 AM

mummyman321

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From: Dusseldorf
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I love safe sex. I am usually fully covered, head to toe in rubber :)

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Post #: 67

RE: Safe Sex -- Does Anyone NOT Practice It? - 1/4/2012 7:30:36 AM

tj444

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LillyoftheVally

quote:

ORIGINAL: DaddySatyr
First off; there are some that are allergic to latex

http://www.condomusa.com/8g07-condom.asp

To the OP. My partner and I do not use condoms, though I am sexually monogomous. Before him I did use condoms with most partners (not with oral sex, ever though)

Whenever a guy has said that to me and i bring up non-latex condoms,.. its funny hearing them sputter away.. Of course its something discussed well before being in the position of needing them.. I usually have qualified guys before even meeting them.. If a guy keeps insisting on not using condoms, those guys scare the poop outta me and i wont meet them.. that is pretty much where it ends with me..

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Post #: 68

RE: Safe Sex -- Does Anyone NOT Practice It? - 1/4/2012 7:42:15 AM

mummyman321

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From: Dusseldorf
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I have to laugh at your latex allergy comment. Just to let you know I have gotten the same excuse from a lot Dommes. So this excuse happens on both sides :)
While some claims are very legit a90% allergic response gets questionable

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Post #: 69

RE: Safe Sex -- Does Anyone NOT Practice It? - 1/4/2012 7:50:20 AM

tj444

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quote:

ORIGINAL: mummyman321
I have to laugh at your latex allergy comment. Just to let you know I have gotten the same excuse from a lot Dommes. So this excuse happens on both sides :)
While some claims are very legit a90% allergic response gets questionable

I dont like condoms either, hate them but until i happen to be in a living together relationship with a guy i feel i can trust then they are required.. (sigh) I am not sure what is worse tho, not having any sex or having sex with a condom.. guess that is why i am not into casual sex,.. right now i would rather forgo sex entirely (until i find that right guy)..

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Post #: 70

RE: Safe Sex -- Does Anyone NOT Practice It? - 1/4/2012 7:52:02 AM

MariaB

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RNA tests are only available in certain parts of America but are not widely used. Rapid testing is less reliable than the more conventional methods and tends to be blighted with too many false positives. The window period for the body to produce antibodies against the virus can be anything from 2 weeks to 10 weeks. They recommend that if you have a test within 3 months of your last sexual partner, you should have a further test at 6 months. Some people can take that long to produce antibodies.
We can live without symptoms of HIV for up to ten years, all the while transmitting it to our various lovers. If we have put ourselves at risk with anyone then its nothing less than irresponsible to have sex with someone else before being tested ourselves. We could be giving them the death sentence. They may go on to marry and have children with HIV or AIDS. I don't get why people won't get tested. Some people would rather not know and yet continue to be promiscuous. They have that 'may get run over by a bus tomorrow' attitude and don't think of the devastation they may be inadvertently causing others.
The other thing to keep in mind here is the subtype groups of HIV. A person can become infected with multiple strains of HIV. Some of these strains can progress faster to AIDS and death. Some strains are less responsive to antiretroviral drugs.

Statistics show that 1 in 16 male Americans have Genital Herpes and 1 in 15 women have it. There is only one way to protect yourself from it and that is to abstain from sex with someone who hasn't been tested for it. Condoms can help but because a condom doesn't fit over the entire genital area its still possible to contract the HSV-2 infection.
Herpes may play a role in the spread of HIV. Herpes can make people more susceptible to HIV infection, and it can make HIV-infected individuals more infectious.

(in reply to LillyoftheVally)

Post #: 71

RE: Safe Sex -- Does Anyone NOT Practice It? - 1/4/2012 8:13:18 AM

LillyoftheVally

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Joined: 7/22/2009
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quote:

ORIGINAL: MariaB
I don't get why people won't get tested. Some people would rather not know and yet continue to be promiscuous. They have that 'may get run over by a bus tomorrow' attitude and don't think of the devastation they may be inadvertently causing others.

Bad information is one reason, such as whether you need to declare being tested on various forms (such as life assurance) and what that implies about your risk level. Also I have found that many clinics do not like to test unless there is considerable risk. I have been tested various times for different STD's but for some reason they can be funny about HIV testing.

quote:

Statistics show that 1 in 16 male Americans have Genital Herpes and 1 in 15 women have it. There is only one way to protect yourself from it and that is to abstain from sex with someone who hasn't been tested for it. Condoms can help but because a condom doesn't fit over the entire genital area its still possible to contract the HSV-2 infection.
Herpes may play a role in the spread of HIV. Herpes can make people more susceptible to HIV infection, and it can make HIV-infected individuals more infectious.

Herpes can lead to cervical cancer also so is a pretty nasty STD. Though it is only infectious when active, people can have herpes without having an outbreak. You are of course completely right about the condom issue, its not enough protection against herpes.

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'My doctor says that I have a malformed public-duty gland and a natural deficiency in moral fibre, and that I am therefore excused from saving Universes.'

Nah I am not happy to see you either

(in reply to MariaB)

Post #: 72

RE: Safe Sex -- Does Anyone NOT Practice It? - 1/4/2012 8:19:05 AM

Duskypearls

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It would seem to me the lack of an instant and obvious consequence (death) may factor into the reason many are somewhat blaise about STDS. Something along the lines of smoking, where the effect and changes are slow and subtle, so you think you're getting away with something, and can continue to do so for a long time. Ask the same people if they'd willing step out in front of a speeding locomotive, and I'm guessing, chances are, they'd delcine.

Perhaps the "invisibility" factor plays a part, as well. STD boogity oogities are invisible to the naked eye, so may seem less likely or less dangerous.

Then there are those (commonly the young), whose youthful sense of invulnerability may serve to impart upon them a false cloak of protection/safety. That old, "It can never happen to me," sort of thing.

Finally, there is the denial/disconnection factor. What I can't see, don't admit to, or recognize, can't hurt me. Sort of the head in the sand approach.

(in reply to MariaB)

Post #: 73

RE: Safe Sex -- Does Anyone NOT Practice It? - 1/4/2012 9:19:20 AM

MariaB

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Joined: 4/3/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LillyoftheVally
Bad information is one reason, such as whether you need to declare being tested on various forms (such as life assurance) and what that implies about your risk level. Also I have found that many clinics do not like to test unless there is considerable risk. I have been tested various times for different STD's but for some reason they can be funny about HIV testing.

Many STD clinics in the UK are as anonymous as you like: You don't have to give your real name. In America an HIV diagnosis is a notifiable disease but being tested for HIV can be totally anonymous. You can even get home testing kits.

We had the same problem when we went to our local STD clinic to get tested. We had to fill in this long form of multiple questions, the most important ones being, 1) Have you had sex with an African. 2) has your male partner had anal sex with another male. 3) has your male partner had anal sex with you. If you answer no to all the above questions they will consider you are not a high enough risk. Anyone seriously wanting an HIV test without a load of hassle should answer yes to at least two of these questions.

Edited to say; obviously some of those questions are about needle use. In our case there was needle use but not from drugs but piercing play.

< Message edited by MariaB -- 1/4/2012 9:23:49 AM >

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Post #: 74

RE: Safe Sex -- Does Anyone NOT Practice It? - 1/4/2012 10:45:51 AM

SailingBum

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From: Sailin the stormy sea
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quote:

ORIGINAL: SinzMaster

Actually some people are running around like Aids up and magically left the planet.

When it's spreading way faster than before.

That is mostly due to the fact that it's no longer big news in the mass media.

Just a random thought.

While that is true the rise seems to be in under developed countries. The odds of me banging some babe from a county in Africa are slim to none and slim just left town. With that said I go bareback only in a committed relationship. Seems the prudent thing to do.

BadOne

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RE: Safe Sex -- Does Anyone NOT Practice It? - 1/4/2012 11:26:47 AM

Toppingfrmbottom

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Me either. we're mono sexually and if we play with others it's non sexual and so rare, and we're both clean and we know it, I hate condoms, it kills any and all sensation no matter how thin, so I am the one refusing to wear condoms, he would go along with it if I insisted, cause we've had moments in time where my birthcontrol was lagging and or I wasn't on it and we used condoms, but it sucked all the joy out of the sex for me.

quote:

ORIGINAL: RaspberryLemon

I have never been involved in anything polygamous and never intend to be. So perhaps this is not as relevant but...

Since when did "safe sex" equal "always wear a condom"? Both me and my partner are clean (been tested) and yes, in the beginning of our relationship we used condoms, as I was not on birth control; now that I am on the pill, we don't use them anymore. I don't see anything wrong with that. Both of us are clean and disease-free, there is a solid form of birth control in place, so honestly I don't see the point in the hassle of using condoms (especially considering that there IS a sensation difference for both of us.)

I think this applies in all circumstances, even in a polygamous arrangement. As long as all of the people involved have been tested and confirmed to be disease-free, and there is a sufficient birth control situation in place (unless there is the intention of pregnancy, of course,) I don't think that not using condoms is a bad thing. Condoms are not the only way to practice "safe sex."

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Post #: 76

RE: Safe Sex -- Does Anyone NOT Practice It? - 1/4/2012 3:09:56 PM

angelikaJ

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LillyoftheVally

quote:

ORIGINAL: MariaB
I don't get why people won't get tested. Some people would rather not know and yet continue to be promiscuous. They have that 'may get run over by a bus tomorrow' attitude and don't think of the devastation they may be inadvertently causing others.

Bad information is one reason, such as whether you need to declare being tested on various forms (such as life assurance) and what that implies about your risk level. Also I have found that many clinics do not like to test unless there is considerable risk. I have been tested various times for different STD's but for some reason they can be funny about HIV testing.

quote:

Statistics show that 1 in 16 male Americans have Genital Herpes and 1 in 15 women have it. There is only one way to protect yourself from it and that is to abstain from sex with someone who hasn't been tested for it. Condoms can help but because a condom doesn't fit over the entire genital area its still possible to contract the HSV-2 infection.
Herpes may play a role in the spread of HIV. Herpes can make people more susceptible to HIV infection, and it can make HIV-infected individuals more infectious.

Herpes can lead to cervical cancer also so is a pretty nasty STD. Though it is only infectious when active, people can have herpes without having an outbreak. You are of course completely right about the condom issue, its not enough protection against herpes.

Not true; you are confusing Herpes with HPV which can cause genital warts and other strains cause cancer: cervical, penile, anal and throat/mouth cancers as well.

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Post #: 77

RE: Safe Sex -- Does Anyone NOT Practice It? - 1/4/2012 3:22:30 PM

LillyoftheVally

Posts: 1826
Joined: 7/22/2009
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quote:

ORIGINAL: angelikaJ

Not true; you are confusing Herpes with HPV which can cause genital warts and other strains cause cancer: cervical, penile, anal and throat/mouth cancers as well.

Yeah I think i am.

This suggests there is a link http://www.webmd.com/genital-herpes/guide/20061101/herpes-virus-linked-to-cervical-cancer but as you say, in conjunction with HPV

< Message edited by LillyoftheVally -- 1/4/2012 3:24:27 PM >

_____________________________

'My doctor says that I have a malformed public-duty gland and a natural deficiency in moral fibre, and that I am therefore excused from saving Universes.'

Nah I am not happy to see you either

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Post #: 78

RE: Safe Sex -- Does Anyone NOT Practice It? - 1/4/2012 5:09:29 PM

tiggerspoohbear

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nm

< Message edited by tiggerspoohbear -- 1/4/2012 5:10:29 PM >

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Post #: 79

RE: Safe Sex -- Does Anyone NOT Practice It? - 1/4/2012 5:24:52 PM

fetisheden

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Joined: 1/25/2011
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if you read any of the escort forums your head would explode, then. plenty of men there complaining that prostitutes require them to wear condoms. it just reminds me that men always think with their little brain & not the big one

quote:

ORIGINAL: gorgeoushair

Believe it or not, there are those who are not sexually monogomous, have multiple sex partners, and do not practice safe sex.

For example, i cannot believe that, in this day and age, that any man would not wear a latex condom when any kind of penetration is involved (not that this is absolutely foolproof, but the best we have so far). Yet, i hear of men (still) not wanting to wear a condom, and indirectly blaming their partner for insisting on it, by complaining of the lack of sensation. i thought that kind of thinking and complaining went out after the advent of the AIDS epidemic in the 1980's. Look, we know there is less sensation. Sorry. We did not invent STD's or AIDS. We do not want to contract those diseases. Thank you for wearing a condom. Comments?

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