strongbottom88
Posts: 40
Joined: 9/10/2011 Status: offline
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This I understand. I have generally only topped women (and only occassionally) who regularly topped me because I get that they want the rush of the physical challenge etc. I also get that there is a fundamental difference between something like a bondage scene as a top or bottom and a more compliant dynamic such as something like "kneeling." Bondage is a huge kink for me so if I am in the right frame of mind then I could probably do a bondage scene with just about any woman I found attractive and who gave me even the slightest dominant vibe (and a vibe of being at least half way sane). Something more compliant takes a serious bond built on serious trust, and a gradually built up desire to pleae and submit. Where I am at a different space, is that I don't percieve any issue with a woman I develop a submissive bond to (much less a bond as a bottom) liking to bottom or even submit to someone else. Their energy with me is still dominant and/or "toppy." I also don't feel submissive energy to the person who tops my top because I haven't developed (and may not be capable of developing) that type of energy with them. quote:
ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus I am not a switch. I have bottomed very heavily in the past, and have these memories of having a blast, but it was only bottoming for physical challenge and sensation, and always with the same folks who bottomed for me (with the exception of rope). Never in a million years would I kneel to someone, or do anything remotely submissive. It's just not me. Just like being bisexual isn't me. I understand wanting to bottom, I remember the fun (though if it was so much fun, wouldnt I have done it at some point in the last 12 yrs?) but I really have a hard time wrapping my head around dom/sub switches. I'm not even going to tell you that I don't have any internal issues about it--because when I see a woman with a submissive submit to someone else? Big time cognitive dissonance. BIG TIME. I don't look down on them, or try to "change" anyone, because we should do what makes us happy, but yeah, it makes me very, very, very uncomfortable. I have read on other threads that predominantly sub/bottom women totally freak out when they see men they view as dom/top bottom. Or yanno, want a prostate massage. I say it's good to know that you feel that way. If you find that this personal prejudice gets in the way, work on it, otherwise, smile silently, because other folks are giving YOU the hairy eyeball over what you do. Real life example--a few years back we brought Midori to town, and I got to be her wrangler and bondage bunny. (YES I RULE!!!) Big domly dom Hib, getting this total fancy scene with Midori, in front of over a hundred people. It was teh awesome, we totally clicked. NO ONE said anything to me that wasn't congratulatory. They were way impressed that I would do something like that in public. Actually enhanced my street cred that I got hogtied on a stage. Go figure.
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