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Why do you do this? - 9/25/2011 5:56:44 PM

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From: Denver, Colorado
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(This is going to be x-posted through the Master, Slave and Switch boards, just so I can get different answers.)
So the question? Why do you do this? Yes there's the answer of “It's just who I am” well, what makes this who you are? What was your starting point that made you realize “I'm not like the 80%(just a random percentage, no real proof behind it) of other people out there that don't participate in kink/bdsm? Why do you still do it after X amount of years? What is it about BDSM that keeps you in it?

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RE: Why do you do this? - 9/25/2011 6:05:26 PM

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I like traditional relationships...man as the head of the household, leader of the relationship, king of his home. It's that simple.

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Nothing has changed
Everything has changed

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RE: Why do you do this? - 9/25/2011 6:09:44 PM

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From: Kentucky
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Cross posting is not allowed here. I suggest you pick one or the other. (people from all sides will answer no matter where you post it anyway.)

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~Christina

A nice girl with a disturbing hobby

My femdom findom blog: http://www.MistressAvarice.com

(in reply to littlewonder)

RE: Why do you do this? - 9/25/2011 6:11:46 PM

MissImmortalPain

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I never had it pointed out to me the that any % of folks weren't into kink. I didn't think of it as kink to begin with though. I just thought...this is what I like so this is what I seek out. Things have changed over the years but I still just seek out what I find attractive. It makes me, and a few others , happy so I keep doing it.

< Message edited by MissImmortalPain -- 9/25/2011 6:12:48 PM >

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It is always by way of pain that we arrive at pleasure.

We must all go through a right of passage,and it must be physical, it must be painful,and it must leave a mark.

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RE: Why do you do this? - 9/25/2011 6:32:29 PM

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I don't follow. It sounds like you're saying there should have been an epiphany when I suddenly discovered that I was different and that I had a chance to vanillafy.

It happened the other way for me. I never understood why I was so concerned about others and what I felt was best for them, why I didn't like taking orders, and why I got such a charge when girls got spanked on their birthdays at my high school. Once I stumbled onto D/s on the Internet, it all fell into place and I realized that I had a place.

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"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

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RE: Why do you do this? - 9/25/2011 7:04:17 PM

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From: Arizona
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The more I saw,learned, and experienced with BDSM / kink, the more I realized it fit with who I am. Some interests have changed over time but who I was yesterday and who I am today wouldn't be as complete with My kink / BDSM, and 'nilla interests.

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"Don't fall away, and leave love bleeding."

"I am who I am today because of choices I made yesterday."

"To bring the pieces back together - rediscover communication."

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RE: Why do you do this? - 9/25/2011 7:06:25 PM

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^^^ without My kink, BDSM, and vanilla interests.

_____________________________

"Don't fall away, and leave love bleeding."

"I am who I am today because of choices I made yesterday."

"To bring the pieces back together - rediscover communication."

(in reply to RexDarcy)

RE: Why do you do this? - 9/25/2011 7:15:22 PM

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I knew I was a freak when I was young. Changing never occured to me. Why do I do this? Because I don't know how not to do this.

_____________________________

pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding ~Gibran, Kahlil

“The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.”
― Bob Marley

(in reply to sirsnake1134)

RE: Why do you do this? - 9/25/2011 8:34:24 PM

NocturnalStalker

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Because the greatest symphony is that of screams.

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RE: Why do you do this? - 9/25/2011 8:39:44 PM

HeatherMcLeather

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From: The dog house
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It makes me wet.

(in reply to sirsnake1134)

RE: Why do you do this? - 9/25/2011 8:48:21 PM

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There's a STRONG parallel with being gay. No one walked up to me and said "Today is the day you get to decide whether you want to be gay or straight." I'm totally sure that noone here had a day when someone walked up to them and said "Today is the day you get to decide whether you want to be vanilla or kinky."

As for percentages, studies are starting to show gays at 10% of the general population, kinky folk at 15%. [Lots of kinky folk seem to assume that LeatherMen represent gays as a whole. NOT so. I am discriminated against by vanilla gays. // sarcasm font = ON What a concept! sarcasm font = OFF]

So, that means that out of 1,000 folks, there are only about 15 LeatherMen (gay BDSMers.)

VERY recent study gives hints that gay genes are Darwin / evolutionary to balance "overly" fertile females. I have 2 sisters, no brothers, 5 nieces, no nephews - through my parents. My maternal grandparents had one son and my mother. That son, my uncle had two daughters and TWELVE grandchildren. That says a lot about why yours truly is gay.

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"Train 'em the right way - my way." Lance Hughes
"Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer, but wish we didn't." Erica Jong

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(in reply to NocturnalStalker)

RE: Why do you do this? - 9/25/2011 9:37:21 PM

VideoAdminSigma

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quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsnake1134

(This is going to be x-posted through the Master, Slave and Switch boards, just so I can get different answers.)

No, it's not.

VideoAdminSigma

(in reply to sirsnake1134)

RE: Why do you do this? - 9/25/2011 9:39:55 PM

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This reminds me of a conversation my little girl and I were having the other night. We'd discussed it before, but it came up in conversation again. She said that she enjoyed her submission because she could just relax, let go and not have to think about anything but pleasing me. She could just follow the lead of another. She sometimes refers to it as a "mental holiday."
(She also craves hard use, and I'm more than happy to satisfy those cravings for her. But that's for another time.) She said that she didn't get it, why dominants would want all the responsibility of owning a submissive. I explained to her that I enjoy the responsibility. I enjoy running our relationship. Knowing that everything is under control... Under my control... That's when I can relax.
So, long story short(er)... Why do I do this? I enjoy control. Control of her and everything involved in our relationship.

_____________________________

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"I love you, Sir. You make my heart sing and my panties wet. What more could a girl ask for?" - hejira92

"And that's why it's good to be...Me." - Gene $immons

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RE: Why do you do this? - 9/25/2011 9:44:46 PM

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Joined: 9/12/2011
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quote:

ORIGINAL: xxblushesxx

Cross posting is not allowed here. I suggest you pick one or the other. (people from all sides will answer no matter where you post it anyway.)

THIS!!

And, now to actually answer the question... well I have tried vanilla, gone back and forth over the 12 or so years I have been dating but time and time again I come back. I am the kind of person who is very good at taking charge and getting things done but I am also the kind of person who doesn’t like doing that in my personal life. I like giving up that control and feeling safe in doing so. I like giving myself to the right person; it is the kind of freeing safety that I crave.

There is a lot more to it for me but this is the basic non heart baring addition.

Ailey-who knows exactly why she does this

< Message edited by AdorkableAiley -- 9/25/2011 9:57:45 PM >

(in reply to xxblushesxx)

RE: Why do you do this? - 9/25/2011 9:56:51 PM

Arpig

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From: Increasingly further from reality
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~FR~
I do it because it's fun, what more reason do you need?

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RE: Why do you do this? - 9/25/2011 10:42:01 PM

Kana

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Because I like violent sex, and sluts who crawl, and raking folks over the coals. I do it because it satisfies me. I do it because otherwise sex feels meaningless and trite. I do this to slake my eternal thirst in the depths of her.

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"One of God's own prototypes. A high-powered mutant of some kind never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die. "
HST

(in reply to Arpig)

RE: Why do you do this? - 9/25/2011 11:20:27 PM

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Joined: 8/22/2011
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One day I tried pepsi, I like coke far far more. Seems this is true of many things in life.

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Basically if you can't inspire someone to trust you deeply, you aren't going to be able to buy that or a reasonable facsimile thereof. -DesFIP

(in reply to Kana)

RE: Why do you do this? - 9/25/2011 11:30:41 PM

Kana

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Endivius
One day I tried pepsi, I like coke far far more.

That's because you are a civilized soul :-)

_____________________________

"One of God's own prototypes. A high-powered mutant of some kind never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die. "
HST

(in reply to Endivius)

RE: Why do you do this? - 9/25/2011 11:36:03 PM

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Joined: 3/9/2006
From: The cold bit of the UK
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I lived a numb, beige life until I started to explore bdsm. Now my life is filled with sensation and colour.

I don't like beige any more.

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There's nowt so queer as folk

(in reply to Kana)

RE: Why do you do this? - 9/26/2011 12:47:36 AM

Posts: 32566
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I'm a Dominant because I have a natural ability to lead and like having the control that gives Me. I'm a sadist because hurting people for fun is something I enjoy. The benefits of both of these is greater than when I do not do them. When that ceases to be true, I'll stop.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

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