RE: AGE. Since weight is being done.

RE: AGE. Since weight is being done. (Full Version)

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cuddleheart50 -> RE: AGE. Since weight is being done. (5/25/2006 3:13:52 AM)
I like someone around my age, so we at least have some things in common, I don't think that someone 20 will have the same interests as me at 50...Just me.

Quivver -> RE: AGE. Since weight is being done. (5/25/2006 3:19:44 AM)
While I agree Maturity is an issue much of what creates that is life experience, in many cases having lived through the drama and learning to overcome. Problem is there's a flip side to that coin too. What I've found at least for me is that many I meet who match in the life experience level have also learned to play it safe, or at least safer then I am ready to. What I'm talking about is really pretty much a Nilla related loss of adventure. "oh I'm too old to ________" or worse yet, those that are ready to sit on the porch and have added "nap" to their daily vocabulary. Add that together with how we as humans seek things that are ascetically pleasing (which youth has more ability to offer) being an ~older~ has its disadvantages. just my 2 cents

Kedikat -> RE: AGE. Since weight is being done. (5/25/2006 3:22:33 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: purplerose quote: What reasons do we put to limit our choices as to age of possible partners? Stability, or lack of it? Possible material wealth level? Physical match? Experience, or lack of it? So many things are thought to come or go with age. What might be the ones that make you seek an age range? I don't think I could have a relationship with someone 45+ because thats just getting too close to my parents ages and that just weirds me out too much. The other thing that would put me off going out with someone older is I want someone who I feel comfortable taking home to meet my parents. I'm pretty close to my family and their approval is something that means alot to me, I want them to be able to get on well with my partner. hehe I have seen that " My parents age " comment several times. Guess someone looking for Daddy Dom is opposite to that sentiment. As to the parents acceptance. I recall how badly a 23 yearolds Dad and Mom wanted her to snag Me when I was 36. I didn't want her that badly though, and she felt the same. It was sort of there, but not. We each had our reasons, and age wasn't really one of them.

Kedikat -> RE: AGE. Since weight is being done. (5/25/2006 3:28:21 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Quivver While I agree Maturity is an issue much of what creates that is life experience, in many cases having lived through the drama and learning to overcome. Problem is there's a flip side to that coin too. What I've found at least for me is that many I meet who match in the life experience level have also learned to play it safe, or at least safer then I am ready to. What I'm talking about is really pretty much a Nilla related loss of adventure. "oh I'm too old to ________" or worse yet, those that are ready to sit on the porch and have added "nap" to their daily vocabulary. Add that together with how we as humans seek things that are ascetically pleasing (which youth has more ability to offer) being an ~older~ has its disadvantages. just my 2 cents Oh I know...........A sub plied Me with retirement house pics. Tales of FLA. Wooohooo Party! Call Me when I'm at least 60. I play some things safe, but try to keep it to a minimum. I pay My bills, meet My obligations. I have a terrible time trying to nap.

Dustyn -> RE: AGE. Since weight is being done. (5/25/2006 4:33:37 AM)
Seeing someone romantically, kink or no kink, that is either younger than my sister or older than my mother is just slightly odd to me. It's the visceral, subconcious correlation to those two people that would disturb me, I think. I won't completely rule it out, but I'm not going to go out of my way to find someone outside of those limits. And maturity is never a constant or a given, regardless of the age.

LadiesBladewing -> RE: AGE. Since weight is being done. (5/25/2006 4:47:28 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Kedikat What reasons do we put to limit our choices as to age of possible partners? Stability, or lack of it? Possible material wealth level? Physical match? Experience, or lack of it? So many things are thought to come or go with age. What might be the ones that make you seek an age range? People limit in terms of age because they have a preconcieved notion of what -being- that age means or looks like. To me, the age issue is a little different than the body-type issue, or hair-color issue, or such, in that each of us ages differently -- some show their miles sooner, some less soon, and it is nearly impossible to guess how old someone is these days by speech or appearance. Because of this, for me age is an irrelevancy, except for the issue of being old enough to legally give consent. Appearance is another issue entirely. I can understand people who are not attracted to certain body-types or hair colors or whatever. Each of us has individually programmed preferences in these areas, and even for those who rail and fight against the "unfairness" of people choosing thin over fat, brunette over redhead, or short over tall, there are few in the human race who don't have -some- preference in the type of person that they choose to become intimately involved with. I tend to prefer the mature, the intelligent, the humorous, and the motivated. Immature, boring, stuffy, and dull people just don't attract me. In the end, we all get to choose, and that's what makes this such an amazing opportunity for everyone. ZWD

foxnotinsox -> RE: AGE. Since weight is being done. (5/25/2006 5:41:58 AM)
quote: What reasons do we put to limit our choices as to age of possible partners? Stability, or lack of it? Possible material wealth level? Physical match? Experience, or lack of it? So many things are thought to come or go with age. What might be the ones that make you seek an age range? In my profile, I have put an age range of late 30s to late 40s, which is about my age +5 years. I have found that Gentlemen older than this tend to be cynical, set in their ways, and a bit umm stuffy. Younger ones, on the other hand, tend to be flighty and not yet in control of their desires ... hmmm so how could they be in control of mine. Please please do notice I use the word tend and not are. The age thing though is a guideline not a hard a fast rule. My former partner was 31, and my first lifestyle partner was 20years (and a week!) older than I. With both, I had a wonderful time .. yet .. there were fatal cracks with the age difference. Neither had children, so both reacted poorly to the fact that I am a Mother first (and yes, that word is capped purposefully), in that they behaved selfishly with respect to my child .. that they came first before the child. Ummmm anyways =) ... besides the age difference, life experiences count for much. Those older tend to have experienced and don't have the same level of excitement, while whose younger want to experience .. and how! Maturity too counts for much .. I've been speaking with someone who is 29 that has a good head on his shoulders, and seems to have a handle (ie, control) of his desires. Hmmmm also, I think looks might have something to do with it too. Sometimes it's difficult to see oneself as "this age", instead seeing oneself as younger than one is. Just look at all the profiles which say a certain age, but qualify "looks much younger". Me, I kind of like a bit of grey, a bit of balding (umm cause this generally means a higher level of testosterone in the body heheheheheheh), lines on the face that give testament to how the person smiles. Lastly, I believe that we would like to be with somebody who is similar to ourselves, in age, experience, etc .. for these things give us things to share .. and if we did not share these basic things, what would we have in common? Besides desires =) .. there has to be more to it than just desires... Enjoy the day!

FloridaISIS -> RE: AGE. Since weight is being done. (5/25/2006 5:52:33 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Kedikat "Wonderful sense of humor" One thing that really bothers Me about text conversing is the pitfalls of trying to express humor. Especially dark or sarcastic humor. The tone of voice, the look in the eye, tilt of head and of course crooked smile is not present. And timing is completely shot. I try to tone down My humor online, to avoid the unintended insult so many take from it, and the total falling flat of a true gem :) Kedikat, From Your words and profile I can tell You are a very deep, caring man. As for bridling Your sense of humor, what do we tell our subs---be yourself. Don't suppress who you truely are, as long as You're words aren't spoken with the intent of putting someone down, I say f--k 'em if they can't take a lil humor. It's a character flaw on their end, not yours. I love Your profile and posts. So please carry on and enlighten us more. _____________________ Live, Love, LAUGH your arse off darnit! [:D] Peace and Love, Isis

thetammyjo -> RE: AGE. Since weight is being done. (5/25/2006 6:00:29 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Kedikat quote: ORIGINAL: MsMacComb My only real limit is on the low end so to speak. Immaturity. Yes granted that can apply to some 60 year olds but usually its them "youngins". Beyond that its just if we 'click'. What would immaturity entail? There are different definitions. What is it for you? I'm not MsMacComb but I have a similar limit that actually isn't related to numerical age at all. Immaturity means an inability to realistically assess mundane life -- difficulty managing money, time management issues, lack of stability, lack of goals and the means to pursue them, only focused on immediate satisfaction.... things of this nature. Being able to relax and have fun is fine but one needs to be able to set aside that to deal with meatlife and not just in crisis situations or after being nagged at. I do have to follow my societies laws and so 18 is the absolute minimum for age -- have to be an adult legally. I do have an upper limit based on my family of origin situation -- 10 or less my senior is great though I perfer younger; 10-15 years my senior might be ok; 15+ is probably off limits unless the person really connected with me on many levels. I'll be honest though that my gut reaction is "no".

spankmepink11 -> RE: AGE. Since weight is being done. (5/25/2006 6:02:50 AM)
I also feel most comfortable with someone in my own age range, past experiences....between the ages of 37-50, although there have been a few exceptions over the years. I also agree that maturity is not always measured in age. I do tend to avoid anyone who i could have concievably given birth to on the younger end of the scale, and as for older...well...i usually am not as arttracted to those who are old enough to have been a parent to me. However, as far as the exchange of ideas...and friendship....i love a mixture of ages....sex...orientations...races and cultures.

FloridaISIS -> RE: AGE. Since weight is being done. (5/25/2006 6:16:16 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: spankmepink11 I also feel most comfortable with someone in my own age range, past experiences....between the ages of 37-50, although there have been a few exceptions over the years. I also agree that maturity is not always measured in age. I do tend to avoid anyone who i could have concievably given birth to on the younger end of the scale, and as for older...well...i usually am not as arttracted to those who are old enough to have been a parent to me. However, as far as the exchange of ideas...and friendship....i love a mixture of ages....sex...orientations...races and cultures. Just saw this post. I agree, My son is 14, and like yourself, I don't want anyone who "I could have concievably given birth to". That's just too freaky for Me. On the flip side it hard to envision being with someone my parents' age.

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: AGE. Since weight is being done. (5/25/2006 6:22:23 AM)
http://www.collarchat.com/m_366036/mpage_1/key_age/tm.htm#366124 Should age matter for a sub? http://www.collarchat.com/m_336445/mpage_1/key_age/tm.htm#336457 Yes another ? about age http://www.collarchat.com/m_325491/mpage_1/key_age/tm.htm#325694 Does age difference matter? http://www.collarchat.com/m_290637/mpage_2/key_age/tm.htm#291554 What is the oldest dom you would consider? http://www.collarchat.com/m_220984/mpage_1/key_age/tm.htm#220997 What is it with girls having masters double their ages? http://www.collarchat.com/m_209024/mpage_3/key_age/tm.htm#212527 Does age matter? (2) Reposted: Age matters as much as it matters to you. On many levels, age doesn't really mean much when it comes to the individual. There really are lots of mature, ready, and open younger people who fit in very well with mature, ready and open older people. That being said, one's age IS something of an indicator about them- the culture you grow up in is a HUGE influence on your interests and perspectives, the politics, diseases, education style, music, fashion, art, books, they all get experienced in different ways in different times at different ages. That's not a killjoy- I amaze people all the time by bringing up movie and song trivia from decades before I was born (my mother raised me right). And for someone older who ENJOYS discovering new things, a younger person is perfect as a gateway into the next generation of cultural discoveries. As well there IS something to be said for the stability of the old. Younger people have to go through life stages- finding yourself, job, family, establishing yourself as an adult (a process which is much farther extended than in previous generations, again not a bad thing necessarily). They often don't have the same problems and responsibilities as older people- ex's, kids, health care, etc. There's an element of rapid change and instability in being with someone younger. Finally, none of these has to matter to any great degree at all. We ARE all still people and May'December relationships are a LOT more common than people believe, and they can work out just great. It's not all just older men in mid-life crisis and younger women sponging. We each individually have our own histories, quirks, problems, perspectives and joys. Age won't take that away and it doesn't make it impossible for a relationship to work. As long as you keep everything in perspective, and really examine things, as long as you can use the strengths that you have together and become a cohsive unit- then age can be just another part of the person, something you sometimes love and something you sometimes can't stand.

bandit25 -> RE: AGE. Since weight is being done. (5/25/2006 6:38:04 AM)
I prefer those my own age also. We have more in common...more shared life experiences. After all, what the hell would we talk about after we played? No, I need some intellectual stimulation as well as physical stimulation. I constantly get emails from younger men. Hey, I have kids...I don't need any more. That's just my personal preference.

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: AGE. Since weight is being done. (5/25/2006 6:44:11 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: bandit25 I prefer those my own age also. We have more in common...more shared life experiences. After all, what the hell would we talk about after we played? No, I need some intellectual stimulation as well as physical stimulation. I constantly get emails from younger men. Hey, I have kids...I don't need any more. That's just my personal preference. As I said in my previous post, yes growing up in the similar generation brings with a ready-made set of comparisons and sets of interests to work on. But it really is a fallacy to assume that people won't have many things in common based on age or generation gaps alone. It's the most common question I get asked when I tell people about my age gap relationships "What do you have to talk about?" I haven't figured out what we DON'T have to talk about yet.

LaTigresse -> RE: AGE. Since weight is being done. (5/25/2006 8:29:52 AM)
I have to second Celeste's remark. for me to put a age range is just rediculous. I have met 22 y/o's that I have infinately more to talk about that many women my own age. I find that many people in my age group are acting like they are near death, worried about what they "should or should not" do, what is "proper behaviour" worried about what the neighbours, family, etc are going to think. Personally I do not CARE what others think I should or should not do, what is proper or what my neighbours or siblings think. If they cannot love and accept me as I am........pfffft! I don't think that there is some magic age that we can stop learning and exploring new things. Quite often it is the younger people that get that. I am constantly amazed at how smart and mature some of the 20something crowd is. I am not saying I want to hang out with them exclusively I am just saying that I can have some really enjoyable and intelligent conversations with them. I have also noticed that there is the other end of the age spectrum that I am drawn to, usually 50ish +.........women that have raised their kids and are free to do their own thing. I have met many women in their late 40's, 50's and even 60's that are much freer thinkers, much healthier and younger than our 30 and 40 y/o counterparts. Quite often the men are planted on the sofa with a remote in hand or on the golf course planning their retirements. (Don't get your boxers in a bunch guys, I did not say ALL) I am just speaking of a few I know personally. I still have heartburn over a comment that I was going to be too old to be riding horses the way I do and I should start thinking about getting rid of them. For crying out loud I am only 44 not 104! I am getting off topic I suppose......age in numbers doesn't mean a thing. For me its all about wether or not I can communicate with the person, laugh with them, learn something from them, and respect them as a person.

BlkTallFullfig -> RE: AGE. Since weight is being done. (5/25/2006 8:41:06 AM)
If I were simply looking for people to play with, age wouldn't matter as long as he was over 21 and not so decrepit I felt he'd die after playing with me; but since I'm looking for a life partner, he needs to be someone I can do things with socially without being hyperconscious of our difference... I tend to shy away from someone young enough to be my child or old enough to be my father; I tend to stay within a 10year difference but that has hardly been a hard and fast rule since of last 2 boys I was seriously into was one a bit younger, and one a bit older. So that is what my age range is for... A loose definition of what I desire. M

Lordandmaster -> RE: AGE. Since weight is being done. (5/25/2006 8:51:42 AM)
I have a pretty simple definition of immaturity: it's not taking reponsibility for your actions. Everyone makes mistakes, but the difference between adults and children is that adults are responsible for the things they do. Not all "adults" are adults by that definition, of course.

juliaoceania -> RE: AGE. Since weight is being done. (5/25/2006 8:56:13 AM)
I answered this question before, but I will take a stab in answering all of yours. I used to date men that were at least 10 years older than me, this was my preference. My first dom was 55 when I was 37, old enough to be my father. I loved him a great deal. He was active, healthy, had a youthful outlook in many ways, there were no sexual problems. I found him sexy and attractive. I have long prefered the experience of older men as opposed to men closer to my age. After that relationship broke up I realized that if it had succeeded that I would most likely have outlived him by many years. I decided that I wanted a decade or two more with my lifemate. I wanted to be with someone that would remain as active as I am as long as I will. Nothing in life is assured to any of us, but it is less likely to happen if I hook up with someone that significantly older than I am. I am seeing someone closer to my age now, and yes there is a difference on many levels with music and popculture, books that we have both read, movies that are from our generation. On Edit, I will not date anyone younger and rarely under 40. I will date up to 49. I am not attracted to younger men sexually, I feel the power dynamic would suffer.

Proprietrix -> RE: AGE. Since weight is being done. (5/25/2006 9:00:37 AM)
Most of the time, I leave the age range open. I’m not a stickler for age because, as the OP stated, it’s more about life and how one lives it. However, I’m not blind to the fact that life experience can only be gained by having lived. It stands to reason that a 50 year old has at least 30 more years of living under their belt than a 20 year old. But, that 20 year old might have been out there in the world gaining experience, while the 50 year old might have been very sheltered and hiding from life. Most of the lower ages that I eliminate are more due to future goals. I’ve already had and raised my child. I’m really not interested in starting a relationship with someone who’s looking forward to having babies and experiencing parenthood. I will never be doing any child bearing for any man… ever. Not many people around 19 & 20 years old are ready to make a commitment that eliminates the possibilities of parenthood, carrying on the family name, etc.. And at 19 or 20 years old, I wouldn’t expect someone to make that kind of commitment. But they can be a great play partner. On the upper end of the spectrum, I find other problems. I hope this doesn’t come across wrong, but I find myself very leery of the 60 year old person who claims life experience by reflecting back on 4 former spouses. It sends up a red flag that says "This person is unable to sustain relationships." When I hear the words "My 4th wife ….." I tend to put on the brakes. I’m even more leery if all the former spouses have passed away. It’s difficult when I see a pattern of death in your partners, to have any inclination to want to be the next partner. It could all be to unfortunate circumstance, but I’m content not taking my chances. I also find a lot of the older men (usually above 50), are seeking the lovey-dovey monogamous coupling model of a relationship. Since I’m more poly oriented, that just doesn’t work for me, especially if I’m being made to feel like they are trying to mold me into their former wife of 30 years who recently passed away. On either end of the spectrum, I’m not fond of the generation gap. I’m 32. That means I’m going to reflect back on the 80s a lot. It’s difficult to do this with someone born in 1985. I’m talking about how that song was playing on the radio the night we sneaked into the school gym, and his/her reply is "yeah, I was being potty trained that year." It’s a conversation killer. Same on the other end. I can’t relate well to someone who is reminiscing back on Woodstocks, flower-power, and the Kennedy assassination. When they say "Where were you when Neil Armstrong took that step?" and my reply is "In my mother’s ovary." It’s a bit of a conversation killer. Overall though, I’m more about variety in life, which is one of the many reasons I prefer poly. I don’t believe one person can "be all". I’m perfectly content to have a household filled with loads of people from all different age ranges. (As long as at least one of them knows how to cook!)

truesub4u -> RE: AGE. Since weight is being done. (5/25/2006 9:01:58 AM)
Growing Old Is Mandatory............. Growing Up Is Optional..........

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