Casteele
Posts: 655
Joined: 12/10/2011
From: Near Sacramento, California, USA
Status: offline
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WTF? ARE YOU ALL BLOODY DAFT? Or did I find another site where everyone is either an AI bot spouting rubbish or people hired to make the site look real? I sat here and read all freaking six pages of this insipid drivel, and am utterly disappointed.How CAN you claim to be human and yet have NO emotional response? Talk about complete ignorance and idiocy!
.. Now that I've (hopefully) illustrated the first point I want to make, let me state it before it boils over .. :-P
Some here will read the above and smirk, knowing there was no genuine nastiness or bad feeling in the above. Some here will have the first instinct to jump in anger at, what to them, is a snarky attitude. Some will roll their eyes and think I did a poor job of trolling. Etc, etc. But one thing is certain, it is just text on the screen. It lacks tone and body language, which are often very big cues to help us determine if someone is truly serious or joking around.
Some people have difficulty operating in such a manner, and have a hard time trusting that something in text is accurate and true. One one page, LaT had said almost as much. People like that need to disassociate and control their emotions in order to protect themselves from being led astray by them. LaT also said something to that effect. But there is one thing I do not recall LaT having said: That she does not feel emotions, period. In fact, in the same post as she mentioned the trust issue and need to disassociate, she also mentioned that it was driven by the fact that if she does have and feel powerful emotions that if allowed to affect her unchecked will hurt her badly. (I do not recall her exact wording, however.)
Others, such as myself and a few others who've added comment, have a pretty good ability to pick up the real feelings, emotions, and intentions behind the text, even when there's no solid cues in the text. Yes, we misread and are wrong at times, too, but at the same time, many of us do deal fairly well with it. Then there's yet others who are neither-nor, but somewhere in between. For all of us, though, there is no right or wrong, no better or worse. Each of us is a unique individual, and we all have to find a way to respond to the world around us that works for ourselves.
Another observation I've had while reading everything.. I think there's a lot of miscommunication; failing to properly express with words what one thinks and feels. Reading a lot of LaT's posts, I've seen her view on the topic evolve as the discussion has helped her learn how to better articulate the views in her head, translating them into written words. (Sorry to keep singling you out, LaT, but I definitely agree with what you said about your genuine interest in understanding, and learning, what makes people tick.. which I believe includes your own self, too, right?)
One of those possible miscommunications seems to be when someone says they are unemotional. I do not think that is what they really mean. I believe what they mean is that, for whatever reason, they limit and control how much their emotions affect them. I see this demonstrated by those who state that when the forums bring out uncontrolled emotions in them, it's time to turn off the computer and walk away. This is the only way left that they can limit and control how much their emotions are affecting them when they reach that extreme.
Some of my other thoughts on this topic.. Some of you have mentioned debating the other side, IE, playing devils advocate. I am one such person, for much the same reason. Although for me, it has helped me to learn how to manage my emotions without necessarily disassociating myself from them. It also helps me better understand both sides, so when I form my opinion, [hopefully] I can do so in an intelligent and rational manner. It also helps me identify some of the weaknesses and fallacies in my own current opinion if I have already formed one, and possibly correct them.
Wayyy back to the original post.. I do find I am not capable of being "unemotional" in any fora or medium, be it online, books (I too get so involved while reading that in my head, I become part of the world in which the story is unfolding), movies, or what-not. To me, because I can sense emotions and feelings so well (I consider myself an empath), I think of the different types of media as just different ways of communicating, and rarely get affected whether one or another lacks important unspoken cues. It's all "real" to me because I can meet people mentally and emotionally. Not everyone can do this, and I know plenty of people who put themselves in the mindset that anything online is pure fantasy and "not real." It is unfortunate that some people consider that kind of mindset wrong or invalid, because it is not in and of itself--It usually only becomes a problem and starts an argument when someone accidentally hurts someone else whom is not of the same mindset and cannot remain unaffected. (Or those few cases where someone does it intentionally, getting off on hurting others--unless they're both in to S&M..)
Also related to this topic are concepts like identity and threat to identity. People will fight to the death to preserve their identity--after all, without an identity, you might as well be dead anyhow. This is why so many people who form an opinion that we may think is completely invalid will stick to it no matter how much proof we throw at them. It's one reason why religion and politics are such hot (and hot-headed) topics; Both are deeply intertwined with our identities. Most people, when asked about their religion, will say "I am <xyz>," rather than "I believe in the principles and ideology of the <xyz> faith." The first is a statement of what you are, the second is a statement of what you believe/merely have an opinion about.
It took me many years to come to really realize that, and what all it implies. For example, two people can discuss religion and use terms like "I believe so-n-so is wrong," without starting a war because you are making a statement of opinion without necessarily attacking the identity of the other. But if you say "so-n-so is utterly stupid and wrong," that becomes more of an attack on the other's identity--and they are likely to see red and fight you even to the point of irrationality. But it's very hard to see the subtle difference between those two statements and see why one is an attack and the other is not. That is why sometimes people get insulted and all huffy about a statement you felt was harmless, a simple statement/opinion, but they interpreted it as an attack and got defensive.
::looks back and curses himself for once more breaking his self-promise to not post long posts:: :-P
G'nite all, blessed be.
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RE: How does emotion figure into your on-line interacti... - 
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