RE: Don't call me "Mistress," call me "Chief."

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RE: Don't call me "Mistress," call me "C... - 1/9/2012 11:20:07 PM

thezigg

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How about they call you the old ball and chain.

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RE: Don't call me "Mistress," call me "C... - 1/9/2012 11:20:34 PM

FrostedFlake

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From: Centralia, Washington
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Three data points is enough. "Goddess" will remain an expression and not become an honorific.

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RE: Don't call me "Mistress," call me "C... - 1/10/2012 2:47:04 AM

stellauk

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Just wanted to add that to Pakistanis 'chief' is a hen-pecked husband.

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RE: Don't call me "Mistress," call me "C... - 1/10/2012 3:15:06 AM

imdmb

Posts: 121
Joined: 9/3/2009
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I've always seen a problem with ma'am

ma'am is what you get when you call customer service and they want to tell you that they arent going to be any goddamn help because they dont want to be any goddamn help

usualy goes somthing like this

you: i just want to know how to fix this!
tech: well ma'am, (whatever bullshit excuse)

and from right there, right at that ma'am, you know the "technical support" doesnt care anymore and will make sure you never get help ever. to me, ma'am is actually a way to try to insult and take away power, its not an honorific, its a way of saying "fuck you" without it being able to come back to them as being hostile on review

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this is all my own opinion! dont take it as anything but what i have experienced personaly! this is what has happened to me! results may vary!
im also usually half asleep when im on this forum...

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RE: Don't call me "Mistress," call me "C... - 1/10/2012 5:56:18 AM

thishereboi

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quote:

ORIGINAL: AAkasha

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

Ha! My grandfather called my grandmother "boss"!

I hate being called Mistress, I really do. Some of my friends are Madam, and that's okay, but I am happier with Lady and Ma'am.

It could be said that Lady, Ma'am, and Madam are also sort of expected feminine honorifics; I guess what I am getting at is what would be the impact - positive or negative - on a male sub's psyche, if his femdom "demanded" he permanently address her with something ambiguous, decidedly un feminine and un erotic, or even masculine. Like "sarge" or "boss" or how about "mister"? If it's for her pleasure and not his, would he like it, just as he likes to address his fantasy femdom as "Mistress"?

What if she wanted to be called "pencil"? Or a made up word, which had absolutely no other connotation?

Akasha

Not sure what you are getting at. I called mine "Mistress" but could have just as easily called her "Sarge" if that is what she wanted. How would either way provide me pleasure? If that is what she wants me to call her, I have no problems with it.

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RE: Don't call me "Mistress," call me "C... - 1/10/2012 5:58:26 AM

thishereboi

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quote:

ORIGINAL: imdmb

I've always seen a problem with ma'am

ma'am is what you get when you call customer service and they want to tell you that they arent going to be any goddamn help because they dont want to be any goddamn help

usualy goes somthing like this

you: i just want to know how to fix this!
tech: well ma'am, (whatever bullshit excuse)

and from right there, right at that ma'am, you know the "technical support" doesnt care anymore and will make sure you never get help ever. to me, ma'am is actually a way to try to insult and take away power, its not an honorific, its a way of saying "fuck you" without it being able to come back to them as being hostile on review

Are you sure you are not just getting worked up because they keep calling you ma'am and you are a boy?

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RE: Don't call me "Mistress," call me "C... - 1/10/2012 6:07:17 AM

LadyHibiscus

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~adores THB~

And the men grooving on Mistress is SO commonplace...it's a fixation. Which you don't relate to because GRRLS ARE BETTER.

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RE: Don't call me "Mistress," call me "C... - 1/10/2012 6:28:11 AM

imdmb

Posts: 121
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quote:

ORIGINAL: thishereboi

quote:

ORIGINAL: imdmb

I've always seen a problem with ma'am

ma'am is what you get when you call customer service and they want to tell you that they arent going to be any goddamn help because they dont want to be any goddamn help

usualy goes somthing like this

you: i just want to know how to fix this!
tech: well ma'am, (whatever bullshit excuse)

and from right there, right at that ma'am, you know the "technical support" doesnt care anymore and will make sure you never get help ever. to me, ma'am is actually a way to try to insult and take away power, its not an honorific, its a way of saying "fuck you" without it being able to come back to them as being hostile on review

Are you sure you are not just getting worked up because they keep calling you ma'am and you are a boy?

ok, gotta admit, hilarious

but this isnt really my peeve, this is my moms, thats one of my best memories from childhood because its so damn hilarious to be on this side of the line and know that the people on the other side of the line are about to lose the battle

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this is all my own opinion! dont take it as anything but what i have experienced personaly! this is what has happened to me! results may vary!
im also usually half asleep when im on this forum...

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RE: Don't call me "Mistress," call me "C... - 1/10/2012 6:45:06 AM

MsSylverdawn

Posts: 147
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Hate Goddes, Supreme Being, Her Ladyship, Mistress, Babe, Hey Lady, You There, etc.. etc...etc..

I have a name I like it... Use it.. its the delivery not the verbage persay. You yell MISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSDAWN across the dungeon at me I dont care who you are Im not going to respond. You come up and say Dawn in that lovely respect filled way your going to get a positive response.

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RE: Don't call me "Mistress," call me "C... - 1/10/2012 6:58:08 AM

servuspet

Posts: 67
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From: Detroit, MI
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Ok, I'm one of "those guys" who has a thing for the term "mistress". I don't know why, it's simple, traditional. I think I'd feel weird using other terms, at least the first few times I did.
But, this is why I never use those terms, until told which one.

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RE: Don't call me "Mistress," call me "C... - 1/10/2012 8:29:11 AM

Rochsub2009

Posts: 2536
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AAkasha,
Good question. I definitely understand where you're coming from on this. I cringe at some of the honorifics that I hear in the D/s lifestyle.

Personally, I don't like "Mistress". Mistress is commonly used in dominatrix porn, but it's seldom used in vanilla life. And when the term is used among vanilla folks, it typically means a "chick on the side" that a husband is cheating with. She's his "mistress". So since that definition is much more commonly understood than the D/s definition, I find the term to be unsatisfactory.

I've been with Dommes who have asked me to call them "Princess", "Goddess" and "Queen". Personally, I've found all of these terms to be rather silly (even though I never told them that). Those 3 terms just seem to be too over-the-top for me.

For me, when I communicate with the dominant woman in my life, I try to show honor and respect in both my tone, and in the title that I use. That's why I've always found that I'm most comfortable with the term "Ma'am". When I've been given a command by a Domme, "Yes Ma'am" seems to be a response that communicates my compliance with the order, as well as my recognition of her status relative to mine.

I have also found it very satisfying when I have been made to always include the word "Miss" or "Ms." before her name. So for example, I would never be able to call you "AAkasha". Instead, I would always refer to you as "Miss AAkasha". Once again, that honorific shows respect, which is key for me.

There is actually a dominant woman on this board who prefers to be referred to as "Ms. ____" by those who serve her. Anytime I communicate with her (even on these boards), I would never think of referring to her as anything other than "Ms. ____". Referring to her in any way other than that would just feel wrong to me.

Finally, I once served a Domme who made me refer to her as "Master". She didn't view "Master" as a masculine term. Rather, she thought that it best communicated our relative positions. She thought that its meaning was much clearer than the more ambiguous term "Mistress". Frankly, I agreed with her. I have never found an honorific that I felt communicated the respect that I felt, and reflected our relative positions, better than "Master". I've never understood why more women don't ask to be referred to using that honorific". I don't mean by the title "Master AAkasha". Rather, I mean that the appropriate response to your commands should be "Yes Master". That's how the former Domme that I mentioned trained me to respond to any request, or command that she gave. My response was always to be "Yes Master".

IMO, "Yes Master" didn't communicate masculinity on her part. Rather, it was the perfect phrase to capture the strength of her position relative to mine, and the weight that her requests/commands carried in my eyes.

Does that make sense?

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RE: Don't call me "Mistress," call me "C... - 1/10/2012 8:35:40 AM

LadyHibiscus

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I refer to myself as a master. It's a leather thing. It's not a sexayyy thing, though.

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RE: Don't call me "Mistress," call me "C... - 1/10/2012 8:43:21 AM

Fornica

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It's a bit of an irritant to me to be called anything on here other than Fornica, or my real name, in messages..although I realize (sometimes) the intention is good.
In a D/s situation, I do use Mistress, only for lack of a term I would like better. I haven't thought of one yet. I hate the whole Goddess/queen crap.

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RE: Don't call me "Mistress," call me "C... - 1/10/2012 9:17:37 AM

lthrpup

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I like Mistress in the sense of the female equivalent to Master, but wouldn't think of addressing someone by that, or any other, title until they expressed their preference. Likewise, Ma'am and Sir. However, I just can't get the image of a lady with a plastic hair bonnet out of my head when I hear Ma'am. Many of these preferences are subjective aural aesthetics that unpredictably push buttons in others, so honorifics seems to be another category best left to whatever works between the parties involved.

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RE: Don't call me "Mistress," call me "C... - 1/10/2012 9:19:52 AM

LadyHibiscus

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There is a local woman who launches into a RANT if you call her "ma'am". Very unseemly. So yes, as Lthrpup points out, honorifics can be a minefield, made even worse by the internet.

Hi, I'm Hib. Works great. I cringe when people still introduce me as Mistress Francine.

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RE: Don't call me "Mistress," call me "C... - 1/10/2012 10:35:37 AM

NiceButMeanGirl

Posts: 2756
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I cannot stand Mistress, Goddess, and the like. Miss and Ma'am are my favorites if I'm in a dynamic with someone already. If we're not in a dynamic with each other, my first name is fine.

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RE: Don't call me "Mistress," call me "C... - 1/10/2012 3:18:15 PM

Tantriqu

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everyone's different.
I hate ma'am. Hateithateithateit...lots of service industry type males use it as a blend of 'li'l lady' and 'stupid b-tch'.

I like Mistress, and when I have a sub, we use a different term which sounds perfectly vanilla, but makes me go 'Oooooooh'.
and when I do certain things to good men, I like to be called 'Master.'
and now I like chief...

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RE: Don't call me "Mistress," call me "C... - 1/10/2012 6:47:56 PM

LookieNoNookie

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

quote:

ORIGINAL: LookieNoNookie

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

How about if she was wearing a fireman hat?

Nekkid?

I just ordered a 55 gallon drum of Vaseline.

Hat, and boots. Those Hermes latex ones. Nothing else.

This is not my first rodeo.

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RE: Don't call me "Mistress," call me "C... - 1/10/2012 6:49:24 PM

LookieNoNookie

Posts: 12216
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quote:

ORIGINAL: imdmb

I've always seen a problem with ma'am

ma'am is what you get when you call customer service and they want to tell you that they arent going to be any goddamn help because they dont want to be any goddamn help

usualy goes somthing like this

you: i just want to know how to fix this!
tech: well ma'am, (whatever bullshit excuse)

and from right there, right at that ma'am, you know the "technical support" doesnt care anymore and will make sure you never get help ever. to me, ma'am is actually a way to try to insult and take away power, its not an honorific, its a way of saying "fuck you" without it being able to come back to them as being hostile on review

No.

"Ma'am" is calming.

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RE: Don't call me "Mistress," call me "C... - 1/10/2012 6:51:41 PM

LookieNoNookie

Posts: 12216
Joined: 8/9/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

~adores THB~

And the men grooving on Mistress is SO commonplace...it's a fixation. Which you don't relate to because GRRLS ARE BETTER.