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ElanSubdued -> RE: Help!! Unfinished Homework for Daddy (1/17/2012 8:20:00 PM)
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Hi Berzerkette,
Precursor: this reply is longish and makes some assumptions (based on your profile) that may be incorrect. Hopefully there is something in here that is helpful to you. I don't have time to summarize this at present so you get my thoughts raw and unedited. There is likely plenty of redundancy in these paragraphs. Sorry about that.
quote:
I wasn't sure what to do because my assignment is to vid a girl peeing on my face. I have been trying to find a sub fem but no one seems to respond to my messages.
I went to look at your profile. Okay. So you're on your own a lot and you're at a point where you want to explore your sexuality. That's fine, but it doesn't mean you should do everything that comes into your fantasy mind or that your Dominant asks. Case in point, the assignment you've been given is typically only done between fluid-bonded partners... meaning, there is high opportunity for sexually transmitted diseases and urine bound diseases. Therefore, this is something normally done with someone you know really well, whose sexual health you know, and who you trust. Frankly, were I in your position, I'd call off the assignment and have a down-to-earth and respectful but frank conversation with the Dominant. If you'll pardon the pun, your sexual health isn't something to piss on or piss away.
As for your quandary that female submissives aren't taking the bait, uh yeah... no kidding! What you're asking is for someone to cater to the whims of your fetishes and to the whims of your Daddy. Kinky folks are people like you, me, and everyone else. We like to be treated as people and not as commodities. Friendship. Connection. Honesty. Sense of humour. Kindness. And on and on. All of these are the things that cause someone to want to get to know you and to trust you. So if you want to meet a girlfriend to play with, I'd start with getting to know her mind, personage, and humanity first, and then see if kinky energy develops from that. Starting with "hey, wanna' pee on my face 'cause my Dominant gets a kick out of it" isn't a great starting point.
You also mention (in your profile) wanting to meet bi curious men who will take direction from your Daddy. The same "getting to know you rules" apply when meeting men or women. Nobody likes to be treated as a commodity and service provider for your fetishes... well, unless you've developed rapport to the point where objectification play may be on the table. :-)
If you're starting to explore kinky fantasies for the first time, I suggest taking some time to think about what you want. I mean no offence to your Dominant, but forget about him momentarily. What do *you* want? What fits your lifestyle? Where are your safety boundaries? What turns you on and off? What needs of your offspring must you take into consideration? It's especially important to consider that what is hot in your mind isn't always as hot when played out in real life. Now don't get me wrong, if you want someone to pee on your face, hey go ahead. But there is a safe way to live out this fantasy and a not so safe way. See what I mean? And, to be honest, many people (myself included) have kinky fantasies that simply should never be carried out. It's a good idea to delineate between those fantasies that should make it out of your head versus those that should stay inside while making you warm and wet while thinking about them. There is nothing wrong with heating yourself up with one fantasy (perhaps one that should stay in your head) and then engaging in another activity to safely quench your sexual thirst. Or, if you choose to play out a fantasy, that's okay too, but it's good to think about how to do so in a safe, enjoyable way as opposed to throwing caution to the wind. Haphazard BDSM usually isn't a great approach for success.
I don't know the background of how your assignment came into being, but it may be a good idea to take some time and get to know more about your Dominant/Daddy, especially if this is a fairly new relationship. I hope you have fun exploring, but please use some restraint too. (Heh! Another pun!) There is no need to jump in too fast and too deep, as this is usually a recipe for disaster. Good luck to you and to *those you choose* to play with.
Note my intentional phrase "those you choose". You choose what you do and how you do it, not your Dominant. Yes, you may negotiate with your Dominant and mutually decide he has certain areas of authority over you. However, ultimately you are responsible for yourself and you must live with the decisions you make. Therefore, it behoves you to choose wisely and this includes choosing all your partners carefully, including your Dominant. Blind horny faith will get you in trouble every time. Trust me on this. Please. Engage your mind, intellect, and humanity before engaging the intoxicating energy of your slavish mindset. Ask yourself "is this person someone I like, someone I trust, and someone who has shown they have good decision making skills when it comes to my desires and safety in and out of BDSM"? If you can't answer this question satisfactorily, it's time to step back and decide what to do. Maybe getting to know the person better is a good choice. And then again, maybe, if you've already seen some warning signs, walking away and meeting/finding someone else is a better choice.
When first starting out, it's easy to get caught up in the wave of "oh yeah! I get to explore all this fun, kinky stuff I've been thinking about." This energy is fun, but it can also lead you to make bad choices. Enjoy the energy and simultaneously use your lucid, thinking mind. Think first. Offer your mind and body up second to someone, after they have taken the time to get to know you and proved they are trustworthy.
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