littlewonder
Posts: 15659
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This is Kana...
Personally, and this is just me, I hate, as in hatehatehate, the idea of learning BDSM from books.
Sure, some should be read, for basic safety points if nothing else.
But outside of that, the whole beauty and magic of BDSM, the electric interaction, the rhythm and flow of emotions and energy, the intense closeness and deep personal sharing, they come from the interaction, the sparks that fly between the engaged parties and the was the power dynamic, shifts, rolls and flows.
There ain't no book that can teach you that. There's no book that can teach you not how A sub responds, but how SHE will respond.
The only way to learn that, like so much else in life, is experiential.
Not to be all Yoda-esque, but this is one of those things that's all, less think, more do.
I mean, maybe it's just me, but the whole point of BDSM is the exploration together, the way that two people can meld into one in a scene, the way that you can reach in her mind, in her heart, in her emotions and spirit and just twiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiist, mangle, stroke, caress, make her dance as a puppet on my strings, respond to my every desire.
And that doesn't come from books.
That comes from two (or more) folks dropping some of their guards and going on a journey together, maybe a few hours, but maybe a few weeks, months, years, decades.
It's like skiing.
I can recommend all the books in the world, you can watch all the Warren Miller movies you want, study and practice at home, but until you stand atop that peak staring way the fuck down,breath steaming in the chill, heart beating like a runaway train in your chest, the cold slashing into your face, the heady combination of fear/ adrenalin surging, you don't have a fucking clue what it's all about.
So personally, I'm all for hopping in the sack and getting it on...like bunnies on meth.
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