RE: What was your first time at a local group like?

RE: What was your first time at a local group like? (Full Version)

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hausboy -> RE: What was your first time at a local group like? (3/19/2012 8:29:53 PM)
My very first time was at a "floating" illegal play party (kinda like a floatng craps game) called Club Klitz, held in the Tenderloin in San Francisco. It was also my first time on a motorcycle--(I was living in house of lesbian bikers--no, for real....not a fake profile thing) It seemed really gritty and sleezy....there was a keg, and I was so nervous that I downed a few before realizing I would be riding on the bike to go home. (I remember praying that I didn't fall off the back) It really turned me off.. Then I got an invitation to go to a legit play party--it was held at the old 15 Association play space. Someone had to vouch for me in order to get an invite, and I went with a close friend who I had already played with a few times. I took an hour or two to take it all in--it was the first time I had really seen women using whips and floggers. After a brief negotiation between my friend and a third Domme, I got flogged for the first time and I was hooked! Totally different experience from the first party. So my long-winded point here...if the first munch doesn't float your boat, find another one where you feel more at ease. I went to a munch here for the first time--the men were nervous and awkward--but it gave me a chance to meet some local Dommes who then invited me to the local parties here, and I'm having a damn good time as a result. Don't lose faith.

Alacrity -> RE: What was your first time at a local group like? (3/19/2012 10:29:40 PM)
My first experience was at a play party. I went with a friend who wanted to become a pro-domme. We had met the owner previously for a training session, but didn't know anyone else. Because I was with her, I didn't really socialize/play much with the others. I recalled that I was extremely nervous both because of the environment, and because I wanted to make my friend look good. I honestly can't remember anyone, other than the owner, that I actually met the first time. Other times I returned to that dungeon alone. It is much easier to gain acceptance if you arrive with a lady/friend/sub. However, it's not impossible. Be friendly. Strike up conversations when it seem appropriate, but don't hover. Just try to make a good first impression so the next time they see you they will have good memories. Don't worry if you don't play your first time, though it's certainly possible. In short go with an open mind and have fun.

LPslittleclip -> RE: What was your first time at a local group like? (3/19/2012 10:50:42 PM)
mine was at the dungon in dallas it was a awesome experince to see how much was done. i did not attend local munches till i got to ga i went to as many as i could meeting new folks and learning new things

NuevaVida -> RE: What was your first time at a local group like? (3/19/2012 11:03:26 PM)
I walked in by myself, was warmly greeted by the munch leaders, and that was about it. There was a table full of new people who didn't know anyone, and all the other tables were filled with people who already knew each other. So I sat with the rest of the unknowns, had a less than mediocre time, went home and didn't go back. I did attend a few MAST meetings with a friend, and those were interesting and enjoyable. But my schedule didn't coincide with theirs. Now I go to a monthly dinner/discussion group that I enjoy, and have met some nice people in that group. But I haven't done much in the way of the "public scene" and I haven't gone to a play party.

graceadieu -> RE: What was your first time at a local group like? (3/19/2012 11:18:45 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: don347 quote: Its nothing like your probably thinking its not men dressed in leather and women in corsets or stuff like that. Now that I think about it, that's probably the image I had in the back of my mind - thanks for clarifying that. Yeah, that was a good point. In my experience fetish gear and public kinkiness is really discouraged at munches, because if you freak out the other customers the restaurant/bar/hotel's probably not going to let them keep meeting there.

SpiritedRadiance -> RE: What was your first time at a local group like? (3/19/2012 11:28:48 PM)
Id recommend because of your age looking for a tng event. It might help with your nerves to meet people your age

don347 -> RE: What was your first time at a local group like? (3/20/2012 7:20:36 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SpiritedRadiance Id recommend because of your age looking for a tng event. It might help with your nerves to meet people your age What's a tng event?

OsideGirl -> RE: What was your first time at a local group like? (3/20/2012 7:21:21 AM)
The Next Generation. It's usually 35 and under.

IrishMist -> RE: What was your first time at a local group like? (3/20/2012 7:55:59 AM)
As was already mentioned, it's a good idea to contact the munch leader before attending. Some groups are invite only, while others are less so. In regards to the comments about fetish wear...another good reason to contact the leaders. Some groups DO REQUIRE that you dress a certain way, while others are much more casual.

don347 -> RE: What was your first time at a local group like? (3/20/2012 8:41:20 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: OsideGirl The Next Generation. It's usually 35 and under. Thank you :)

SoulAlloy -> RE: What was your first time at a local group like? (3/20/2012 10:45:15 AM)
It was very friendly even though I was incredibly shy, I simply sat in and listened most of the night. People asked questions but didn't press if I wasn't sure. It was a brilliant night and I'm still in touch with nearly everyone who was there - that was nearly 5 years ago now lol.

FrostedFlake -> RE: What was your first time at a local group like? (3/21/2012 2:43:13 PM)
I met some VERY nice folks. Who were great fun to talk with. And eat with. (The food was good! I had the #5. Prawns, chicken strips and fries. Yum!) And there was a party afterwards. Which was kinda fun. Two things, tho. 1/ There were only six of them. 2/ They were all married. So, it was good, but... I'm looking to visit "the city" next time. I am hoping to meet more, smaller people, who aren't married. And I am thinking I should bring my guitar. Y'know, as a conversation piece, to help me get invited to their party. If someone else brings a guitar, COOL.

peppermint -> RE: What was your first time at a local group like? (3/21/2012 10:59:36 PM)
My first meeting with local kinksters was at a week long kinky campout. There were about 125 or so people there. It was great!!! There were lots of demonstrations, from rope to needles to suspension to pressure points. You could buy all kinds of lovely toys on Venders' Row. At night you could watch all the action in the dungeon. As a newbie I quickly learned I wasn't in Kansas anymore.

AugustTearDrop -> RE: What was your first time at a local group like? (3/22/2012 8:21:39 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: peppermint My first meeting with local kinksters was at a week long kinky campout. There were about 125 or so people there. It was great!!! There were lots of demonstrations, from rope to needles to suspension to pressure points. You could buy all kinds of lovely toys on Venders' Row. At night you could watch all the action in the dungeon. As a newbie I quickly learned I wasn't in Kansas anymore. OMG that sounds like Fun!! Anyways, just wanted to say thanks for posting this question, as someone very curious about group events it was a very interesting read, looking forward to more responses. :)

VanessaChaland -> RE: What was your first time at a local group like? (3/23/2012 3:15:24 AM)
Overwhelming. It was me, two older ladies and like 25 horny guys that all thought I was their next wife. Never went back, lol. :)

don347 -> RE: What was your first time at a local group like? (3/23/2012 11:09:25 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: VanessaChaland Overwhelming. It was me, two older ladies and like 25 horny guys that all thought I was their next wife. Never went back, lol. :) That laugh was a good start to my morning. Thank you.

LoreBook -> RE: What was your first time at a local group like? (3/23/2012 4:35:18 PM)
Intimidating at first. Like you I was nervous and inexperienced and was sure I wouldn't be welcomed. And then increasingly annoying, as every man in the place hit on me over and over, and I was informed again and again that I really would like to sub to them. And then eventually just kind of boring in a pleasant way when the men finally got tired of being told no and the other women figured out I wasn't there to steal their partners. And that pattern, without the "intimidating at first" part, has been repeated at almost every single munch or meeting I've attended. My new girl says that there's an informal group in St. John that is pretty good, and I've let myself be talked into going to a meet there sometime in the summer. I am actually looking forward to it, because any group that welcomes her has got to be pretty interesting.

don347 -> RE: What was your first time at a local group like? (3/23/2012 7:22:20 PM)
It sounds like the munches are barely different from meeting any other group of people. I probably will give it a try at some point in the near future. Thank you for all of your responses. I'll be off of this site soon, but feel free to keep this thread going. It sounds like your responses helped clarify things for a couple of other people as well.

Soyokaze -> RE: What was your first time at a local group like? (3/24/2012 8:57:03 AM)
All the munches I've been to have been really friendly (maybe I'm just lucky in this regard). It's just like any other get together only with conversation tending towards BDSM topics. I'm crazy shy in person so if I can manage to go to one anyone can : p

soumisespastiche -> RE: What was your first time at a local group like? (3/24/2012 1:02:54 PM)
Everyone who was "greeted warmly," I'm frankly jealous. I walked into the coffee shop and smiled generally at everyone who looked at me, and every single person looked at me, but no one came over to me for the first five minutes. I almost walked right back out, because I was very nervous and didn't know what to do. Finally, I walked up to a random friendly-looking man and introduced myself. Within probably thirty seconds I was surrounded by twelve men all getting way too in my space. One of them even playfully grabbed me around the waist and when I politely removed his hands he continued backing me up (with all the others) until I was literally trapped in a corner. Fortunately, I was rescued by a delightful Domme who parted the crowd, introduced herself and maneuvered me out of the corner. She and her husband and the munch organizer all took me next door for a very comfortable conversation and I had a great time. Never going to a munch again - just way too many people backing me into corners :)

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