Karmastic
Posts: 1650
Joined: 4/5/2012
From: Los Angeles
Status: offline
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This is my definition of "quiet" power, using the horrible example of a dog.
DISCLAIMERS:
• Please forgive me for the bad comparison, because people are thinking, loving, and intelligent, caring human beings. Well, so are dogs, but you get the point, I hope. This is not meant to compare any human to a dog in any way, shape or form.
• You don’t normally have to "break dogs". Please don’t turn this into a dog training discussion, or presume you know what I took on or what I should have done.
• This is only my poor analogy regarding "quiet" power. It's not a manifesto, and this is the interwebs. I respect your right to your opinions, and gladly welcome and appreciate hearing your constructive thoughts.
With that said...
The card on the dog pound said "returned, human aggressive", which was a sure death sentence for this dog. But when I looked at this 50 lbs 2yo that was still growing, all I saw was a stunning beautiful dog that was very excited to see me, and wanted me to touch and pet her. I took her for a walk inside the pound, and she was both excited and boundless, but seemed to feel and respond to my control immediately.
I took her home, and she seemed to get along with my other dog, a male. We used to take walks in the trails next to my house, and other neighborhood dogs would join in. It turned out that she is a lonely spirit, and was always circling the pack, but never joining it. She also tested me by sometimes refusing to come when I called her. She also bit me a couple times when I was correcting or punishing her, and I bit right back, but harder. I ultimately had to "break her" like a wild horse, and I know I made some mistakes doing it (don’t we all?).
Cut to 7 years and 35 lbs later (she's a BIG 85 lbs dog), and she's the best companion and a willing member of "the pack" (only two strong at this point, me and her). I think karma put her tough pitt/lab soul in my path, and it took a strong person like me to save her from death, and give her a good loving home with a wonderful yard and all her spaces. I don’t have to "use" my power on her. And in fact, if I do use it, I've lost. Karma always punishes me more than I ever punish her, either by snubbing a finger, or whatever. And she cowers at the mere sight of my disapproval, so, as a sub recently told me, it's kind of a self preservation thing to avoid getting in that space too much. I haven't used physical corrections for many years, and just put her in her room and take away her bed (which is the veranda, a gilded cage I'd say).
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My definition of "quiet" power - 
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I am never the loudest person in the room, I don't think yelling or being loud is necessary to get someone's attention; I have quite a pair of lungs on me if I need to yell fire or incoming though.
I find that if you are more reserved and laid back, and speak when you have something to say, instead of rushing to get a word in every chance you get, people tend to pay more attention to what you have to say. As for the relationship stuff, meh. I never yell at any of my bottoms, if i get frustrated or annoyed, I tend to talk....very slowly .....and......dileberate.....to make.....a point. It works for me.
I took her neck skin in one hand and her jaw (with my hand in it) in the other, and held her down to the ground to dominate her. I trained her away from her impulse to bite me by putting my hand in her mouth, and challenging her to bite me several times. She never dared bite me in that position, and it was easy for her to translate that to any situation. 
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