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Political humour..via twitter - 5/31/2012 2:19:37 PM   
Lucylastic


Posts: 40310
Status: offline 		He does it to himself. Yesterday La Donald sent out a tweet saying

✔
@realDonaldTrump
What could be better than dinner with @MittRomney and me? bit.ly/Kj5jSH


As you might imagine, Twitter had answers to that question. Many, many answers.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/05/31/donald-trump-mitt-romney-dinner_n_1559549.html
Here are a bunch of the replies he received

_________


Things That Would Be Preferable To Dinner With Donald And Mitt, According To Twitter

Access to birth control
Acid bath
Alien invasion
Aneurysm
Answering this question
Anything
Athletes' Foot
Athletes' Foot, on armpits
Bankruptcy
Baptism, posthumous
Bathtub of maggots
Beard ripped off by force
Bedbugs
Being eaten, by lions, by man high on bath salts, by pack of wild dogs, by pack of wolves, by rattlesnakes
Black Eyed Peas, mandatory annual Super Bowl Halftime show
Bleeding, in shark infested waters
Blunt force trauma
Body cavity search
Breakdancing, in skinny jeans
Breathing
Castration
Cervical cancer
Cholera
Circumcision, sans anaesthetic
Cleaning, a cat box, rest stop toilets with hands
Clubbing baby seals
Colitis
Colorectal cancer
Colonoscopy, by Edward Scissorhands, by live python, sans sedation, via chainsaw
Colostomy
Constipation
Cracked rib
Crohn's disease
Crucifixion
Death
Diarrhea
Drinking, colonoscopy prep fluid, contents of WetVac, five year old milk, hemlock, Playboy Mansion grotto water
Drought
Drowning
Dying
Dysentery
Eating, bag of thumbtacks, cat litter, cold mac and cheese whilst in underwear, dog feces, eel sushi by force, Ex-Lax brownies, ghost pepper, hot Frosted Flakes, off floor of Waffle House, Olive Garden, own vomit, rat poison, real New York City pizza, shards of glass, toenails, unrefrigerated pink slime, warm mayonnaise pie, with Dominique Strauss-Kahn, with Hannibal Lecter, with Jerry Sandusky, with Josef Stalin, with just Mitt Romney, with Justin Bieber, with Kardashians, with Westboro Baptist Church
Ebola
Elevator, trapped with gassy Karl Rove
Emergency tracheotomy
Enema, with bath salts, with hot lead, with Tabasco
Erectile dysfunction
Everything
Eyeballs, forked, icepicked, knitting needled, sporked, tattooed
Expressing one's dog's anal glands
Face, punched
Falling, into hole with glass shards
Food poisoning
Gangrene
Gargling, razorblades
Genital mutilation, by ants, by barbed wire, by battery acid, by hammer and burning log, by hot poker, by icepick, by pickle slicer, by pitchfork, by sandblaster, by shoe, by toothpicks, by zipper, in farming accident, on L Train
Getting shot
Gingrich, Newt, in tutu whilst singing "Working In A Coal Mine"
Gonorrhea
Hades/Hell
Hands, ironed, slammed in car door
Hemorrhoids
Hepatitis C
Herpes
Hitting yourself, in face with hammer
Huffing, paint at family reunion
Human centipede
Hunger strike
Ingesting, Comet, fatal amount of Sweet-N-Low, propane (anally)
Jar of farts
Jogging, post-vasectomy
Keelhauling
Kidney stone
Koala Bear, dead and lashed to backside
Lego, stepped upon
Leprosy
Listed, on White House "kill list"
Listening, to Ke$ha performing "Subterranean Homesick Blues," to Nickelback performing the works of Creed, to Octomom lecturing on parenting, to Rebecca Black covering "Chocolate Rain"
Locusts
Losing money in Facebook IPO
Malaria
Nipple, third
Nuclear winter
Papercuts, thousands (followed by lemon juice bath), millions (followed by rubbing alcohol bath)
Pelvic exam
Planking, in traffic
Poison Ivy, anal
Prison
Probe, transvaginal
Ptomaine
Pubic lice
Rectal exam
Root canal
Santorum, Google it
Scurvy
Self immolation
Self-pleasuring, with buzzsaw, with cheese grater, with Icy Hot, with sword
Showering, in molten lava
Sliding, on barbed wire, on dry sandpaper
Sound engineering, with Khloe Kardashian
Sparrow, nailed to forehead
Spiders, sprung from a popped boil
Spinal tap
Staring, at 2012 Chicago Cubs, at 24-hour webinar about personal branding and Klout, at "Battlefield Earth" sequel, at "Benson," at "Cabin Boy," at complete season of "The Apprentice," at Japanese eel porn, at "Leonard Part Six," at Mitt's tax returns, at Mitt/Trump sexual encounter, at a pornographic movie starring one's parents, at "Showgirls, at "The Time Traveler's Wife," at a "Twilight Zone" marathon, at Thomas Kinkade paintings for eternity, at Trump's actual hairline
Starvation
Sucking, on ET's fingers
Swimming, with alligators
Syphillis
Teeth-pulling
Toilet training quituplets
Toupee, Trump's on one's entire back
Trapped, in closet with Victoria Jackson
Universal health care
Unwanted sexual encounter, with buffalo, with corpse, with crocodile, with Dom Deluise in jacuzzi filled with stew, with family, with fifty dollars worth of nickels, with garden tools, with grandmother, with grandmother (dead), with in-laws, with Ravi Shankar's sitar, with Roman Polanski, with Sasquatch, with wall outlet, with wild boars
Urinary tract infection
Vas deferens, destroyed in failed gymnastic feat
Violent encounter, with cheese grater, with Chris Christie over last cupcake, with Dick Cheney, with direwolf, with lawnmower, with piranhas, with rabid bat, with tweezers, with tweezers and back hair and intoxicated chimpanzees, with wakened bear, with Zdeno Chara slap shot
War
Waterboarding
Working on a chain gang
Year without toilet paper
Yeast infection
Zombies, attack, face eaten by

I have yet to add mine:)

_____________________________

(•_•)
<) )╯SUCH
/ \

\(•_•)
( (> A NASTY
/ \

(•_•)
<) )> WOMAN
/ \

Duchess Of Dissent
Dont Hate Love
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Political humour..via twitter - 5/31/2012 4:38:20 PM   
SternSkipper


Posts: 7546
Joined: 3/7/2004
Status: offline 		realDonaldTrump's tweet deck has crashed 1/2 a dozen times since that went out. The downside is he may be headed for the world's record on followers now.



_____________________________

Looking forward to The Dead Singing The National Anthem At The World Series.




Tinfoilers Swallow


(in reply to Lucylastic)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Political humour..via twitter - 5/31/2012 5:42:35 PM   
Aylee


Posts: 24103
Joined: 10/14/2007
Status: offline 		Out of curiosity Lucy, is this the first Twitter campaign humor that you have followed? Because there has been a lot. I can find you a couple of links to others if you want.

_____________________________

Ceterum censeo Carthaginem esse delendam

I don’t always wgah’nagl fhtagn. But when I do, I ph’nglui mglw’nafh R’lyeh.

(in reply to SternSkipper)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Political humour..via twitter - 5/31/2012 5:51:59 PM   
Lucylastic


Posts: 40310
Status: offline 		Not really Aylee, I have to admit, I follow quite a few things on all sides of the "aisle" and other non political stuff, but theres only so many hours in the day so I usually dont bother for long. I followed weiners debacle, for a day or so, but I usually read friends links to things, or from "news" items. So please feel free to share:) either here or on the other side:)
PS I hope you and your lil ones are doing well!


_____________________________

(•_•)
<) )╯SUCH
/ \

\(•_•)
( (> A NASTY
/ \

(•_•)
<) )> WOMAN
/ \

Duchess Of Dissent
Dont Hate Love

(in reply to Aylee)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Political humour..via twitter - 5/31/2012 6:29:22 PM   
SternSkipper


Posts: 7546
Joined: 3/7/2004
Status: offline
quote:

Out of curiosity Lucy, is this the first Twitter campaign humor that you have followed? Because there has been a lot. I can find you a couple of links to others if you want.


When did equal time become some kind of requirement here?

You cons are really touchy this week.

I know I have seen plenty of so-called humor posted by cons.

Need something 'neutral'? Say "Ahhhh"...


< Message edited by SternSkipper -- 5/31/2012 6:31:56 PM >

_____________________________

Looking forward to The Dead Singing The National Anthem At The World Series.




Tinfoilers Swallow


(in reply to Aylee)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Political humour..via twitter - 5/31/2012 7:23:21 PM   
Aylee


Posts: 24103
Joined: 10/14/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SternSkipper

quote:

Out of curiosity Lucy, is this the first Twitter campaign humor that you have followed? Because there has been a lot. I can find you a couple of links to others if you want.


When did equal time become some kind of requirement here?

You cons are really touchy this week.

I know I have seen plenty of so-called humor posted by cons.

Need something 'neutral'?


What the hell are you talking about? No one mentioned "equal time," except you.

The subject is funny Twitter comments. Try to keep up.

_____________________________

Ceterum censeo Carthaginem esse delendam

I don’t always wgah’nagl fhtagn. But when I do, I ph’nglui mglw’nafh R’lyeh.

(in reply to SternSkipper)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Political humour..via twitter - 5/31/2012 7:36:56 PM   
Aylee


Posts: 24103
Joined: 10/14/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Lucylastic

Not really Aylee, I have to admit, I follow quite a few things on all sides of the "aisle" and other non political stuff, but theres only so many hours in the day so I usually dont bother for long. I followed weiners debacle, for a day or so, but I usually read friends links to things, or from "news" items. So please feel free to share:) either here or on the other side:)
PS I hope you and your lil ones are doing well!



The #askmichelle was pretty funny and so was #obamaeatsdogs, off the top of my head. I do not have a twitter account, but I find some of the off the cuff comments that people write rather funny. "What could be better than dinner with Romney and Trump?" "A zombie apocalypse!" That is funny. I think that it is that whole "playing the straight man" thing about it that just amuses me. If I come across one that is about current events, I will send you a link.

The little ones are well. Thank you for asking or commenting.

_____________________________

Ceterum censeo Carthaginem esse delendam

I don’t always wgah’nagl fhtagn. But when I do, I ph’nglui mglw’nafh R’lyeh.

(in reply to Lucylastic)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Political humour..via twitter - 5/31/2012 7:42:36 PM   
Lucylastic


Posts: 40310
Status: offline 		thankyou:)

_____________________________

(•_•)
<) )╯SUCH
/ \

\(•_•)
( (> A NASTY
/ \

(•_•)
<) )> WOMAN
/ \

Duchess Of Dissent
Dont Hate Love

(in reply to Aylee)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Political humour..via twitter - 5/31/2012 7:50:14 PM   
SternSkipper


Posts: 7546
Joined: 3/7/2004
Status: offline
quote:


What the hell are you talking about? No one mentioned "equal time," except you.

The subject is funny Twitter comments. Try to keep up.


I probably read it after reading too many of firm's incessant tit4tat posts... My bad ..... you never join that chorus. I apologise

_____________________________

Looking forward to The Dead Singing The National Anthem At The World Series.




Tinfoilers Swallow


(in reply to Aylee)
Profile   Post #: 9
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