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RE: First Time Meetings - 7/7/2012 11:39:59 AM

tj444

Posts: 7574
Joined: 3/7/2010
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

quote:

cuz they try to get her drunk or high so they can get away with it..

I've never understood this everytime I hear it. Force you to get drunk or high? What? You can't say no??? You can't control yourself to say I am not drinking or getting high while on a date with some dude? If you can't say no then you have deeper problems than I even want to go into here.

I didnt say they forced you to get drunk or high but some try to get you to indulge in getting drunker than you were planning on getting, perhaps encouraging you to have another drink and another or buying you a series of drinks.. thats why rape is a big problem at colleges, especially at colleges that try to sweep under the rug.. gee, you have never heard of a guy wanting a girl to have a few drinks "to loosen up"??? That was never a problem i had since I didnt drink alcohol.. I could see it being a problem for others tho.. especially if they were young and wanted to fit into the college crowd, etc.. peer pressure can be pretty powerful for some, thats how most kids start smoking cigs and get hooked for life..

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Post #: 81

RE: First Time Meetings - 7/7/2012 11:54:30 AM

Winterapple

Posts: 1343
Joined: 8/19/2011
Status: offline

FR
I'm not really sure how meeting someone
for coffee equates to being raped by Shrek
or being forced into a intimate relationship
with someone you aren't physically attracted
to. Apparently, meeting for coffee has
various meanings to various people.

No ones going to rape someone in the
middle of Starbucks but a woman
should still keep her wits about her.
The person you're meeting might not
be alone. You leave the coffee shop
and his friend trails you, etc.

If a photo before a meet is your thing
it's not unreasonable. Put it in your
profile but understand people who
don't want to have reasonable reasons
to.

Many men say in their profiles or in
messages they don't have photos
for professional reasons.

A photo or photos does not mean the
person isn't a scammer.

My observation about photos is they
can be decieving. People are going to
send flattering photos. I see photos of
people on facebook all the time that I
know have never looked that good in
person. Some people know how to pose,
know about angles and lighting.

On the other hand I know plenty of
people who don't photograph well
but in person they're attractive and
sexy.

You can put your preferences in your
profile in regards to body size,etc

But again, meeting someone for coffee
doesn't mean you have to have sex
with them. And what you see in a photo
may not be what shows up in person.
You're not ordering a fuck off Amazon
you're taking a chance and meeting
someone you've only seen and
communicated with online.
You take your chances any way
you look at it.

_____________________________

A thousand dreams within me softly burn.
Rimbaud

(in reply to tj444)

Post #: 82

RE: First Time Meetings - 7/7/2012 12:25:40 PM

TNDommeK

Posts: 7153
Joined: 3/13/2010
Status: offline

This thread has about 700 different subjects going on, I'm gonna try to add My two cents.

First, who's to say the pic they show you isn't fake?

Second, ever hear of Ted Bundy? (I think that's the right seral killer) Wasn't he the one who was very charming and gorgeous. He dated these women then lured them back to his place and (cue sounds from Psyco here) kill them?

Third, if 1 and 6 men are rapists, that means *looking back over the thread at the numbers of guys* a few of ya'll are baaaaaad,lol. I think it is safe to say that statistic is way off.

Fourth, I like everything Lana said in her first post. I have seen a few profiles where the people complain of not meeting anyone and then check what they have to say, and I see why. They are their own demise as far as meeting people.

And finally, OP, if you require a pic, then you do that. If not, then do that too. How you run your life is your choice, there is no right or wrong. But I do agree with what one poster said about missing out on some wonderful people because of it. Example, the Hubs, does not do cam at all for any reason. This one slave wanted him on cam, he said no, she said deal breaker. They stopped correspondence. The last time I read her journal, she was miserable with this guy she chose to go be with, everything they had discussed was thrown out the window once she arrived there (according to her journals). So there is a negative side to that as well. I guess it would be called the trial and errors of life. Good luck.

_____________________________

Goddess of Duck Lips and Luxurious Hair
The working Fin Domme
Professional con artist, swindler, trixster, extortionist

Our snark-nado needs more cowbell

(in reply to Winterapple)

Post #: 83

RE: First Time Meetings - 7/7/2012 3:24:25 PM

MrBlue76

Posts: 82
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

Rape or violence or anything else brutal has never even crossed my mind when I was meeting men. I mean, I was meeting at a coffeeshop with tons of people around. Why would I be worried about rape in a crowd of people? LOL What was he going to do? Force me to have sex in front of about 30 other witnesses? LOL

No, but he's a man, so 1/6 of him (or 1/17, or 60%, I don't remember) will be willing to rape you. So there are chances that you will get virtually raped, in his mind, hapening there, with all that people around!!

(34 to 43% of them will virtually enjoy the show.)

_____________________________

I'm not a native english speaker. So, if I'm writing very stupid things, the reason behind it can be:
1.- That I'm having problems with the language, and translation
2.- That, simply, I'm writing very stupid things
Give me the benefit of doubt!

(in reply to littlewonder)

Post #: 84

RE: First Time Meetings - 7/7/2012 3:42:03 PM

littlewonder

Posts: 15659
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

quote:

cuz they try to get her drunk or high so they can get away with it..

I've never understood this everytime I hear it. Force you to get drunk or high? What? You can't say no??? You can't control yourself to say I am not drinking or getting high while on a date with some dude? If you can't say no then you have deeper problems than I even want to go into here.

Ever hear of a roofie? Horse tranquilizers that are put into a girl's drink so that she's unable to resist after only half a drink.

This is why I stressed to my daughter to never walk away from a drink. Get up to dance? Then buy a new drink.

Despite this being well known to her and her friends, she went to a party and found a friend who had been drugged being raped. She pulled him off of the girl and beat the crap out of him until the cops arrived.

Another friend was not so lucky. She asked for a friend to walk her home, and a boy who was on the school's public safety patrol offered to do so. He should have been the safe choice. Instead he raped her.

Yup I know all too well about it. I understand this. I was raped by the date rape drug but it was within my own home by a trusted friend and we were drinking a lot. In public in a coffee shop, I think someone would have to be stupid. In a nightclub or bar, yeah it would be easy. Everyone would just think you are drunk. Even walking home with someone late at night would be easy.

And like you said, never walk away from your drink. The night that I was raped, I admit I was stupid and young. I was drinking heavily. So was he. So of course I had no idea. I was too drunk to even straight let alone see him slip something.

Now I'm not saying women are to blame for rape...not at all. I'm saying that in a coffeeshop, I just don't see it happening.

_____________________________

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Everything has changed

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Post #: 85

RE: First Time Meetings - 7/7/2012 3:43:24 PM

littlewonder

Posts: 15659
Status: offline

quote:

but I also took care not to go with them to their car or my car.

Exactly! That's my point. INSIDE a Starbucks? Just not gonna happen imo.

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Everything has changed

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Post #: 86

RE: First Time Meetings - 7/7/2012 3:48:31 PM

OsideGirl

Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

quote:

but I also took care not to go with them to their car or my car.

Exactly! That's my point. INSIDE a Starbucks? Just not gonna happen imo.

Part of me thinks it would be cool to see a sex show inside a Starbucks though.......

Just the dichotomy of such a bastion suburbia with dirty sex is intriguing.

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to littlewonder)

Post #: 87

RE: First Time Meetings - 7/7/2012 3:50:30 PM

littlewonder

Posts: 15659
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

quote:

but I also took care not to go with them to their car or my car.

Exactly! That's my point. INSIDE a Starbucks? Just not gonna happen imo.

Part of me thinks it would be cool to see a sex show inside a Starbucks though.......

Just the dichotomy of such a bastion suburbia with dirty sex is intriguing.

lol. Now that would be funny hehe

And imo, this whole men rape thing is why men are paranoid of women and women are paranoid of men and now we have to rely on dating sites to find someone....everyone's too afraid!

_____________________________

Nothing has changed
Everything has changed

(in reply to OsideGirl)

Post #: 88

RE: First Time Meetings - 7/7/2012 3:54:12 PM

LadyHibiscus

Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline

I have never been raped, and I am just not ambiently concerned about it. I don't do exceptionally stupid stuff, but I am not terribly cautious.

Bring it! Please. I want an excuse for mayhem.

_____________________________

[page 23 girl]

(in reply to littlewonder)

Post #: 89

RE: First Time Meetings - 7/7/2012 3:57:50 PM

OsideGirl

Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

I have never been raped, and I am just not ambiently concerned about it. I don't do exceptionally stupid stuff, but I am not terribly cautious.

Bring it! Please. I want an excuse for mayhem.

I was almost raped when I was 14. It was a friend of my father's. I ran into pay for the hay we bought and he pinned me. Unfortunately for him, I was exceptionally strong because I worked horses for 8 hours a day and I was still in my riding boots.

While agree being self aware and aware of your surroundings can prevent a great deal. Sometimes you just in the wrong place at the wrong time.

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)

Post #: 90

RE: First Time Meetings - 7/7/2012 4:00:00 PM

LadyHibiscus

Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline

Everyone I know that was raped, and it is a LIST, was attacked by someone they knew, in a 'safe' environment. I watch out, and I have the look of a fierce creature, but worry? Nope.

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[page 23 girl]

(in reply to OsideGirl)

Post #: 91

RE: First Time Meetings - 7/7/2012 4:03:25 PM

OsideGirl

Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

Everyone I know that was raped, and it is a LIST, was attacked by someone they knew, in a 'safe' environment. I watch out, and I have the look of a fierce creature, but worry? Nope.

Out of all of my friends, only one was raped by someone she didn't know.

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)

Post #: 92

RE: First Time Meetings - 7/7/2012 6:14:16 PM

LaTigresse

Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline

I don't know anyone that wasn't raped by someone they knew and trusted.

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to OsideGirl)

Post #: 93

RE: First Time Meetings - 7/7/2012 6:23:07 PM

JeffBC

Posts: 5799
Joined: 2/12/2012
From: Canada
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact
To date, as far as I know, nobody has been disappointed in meeting Me.

I was fairly disappointed. When we met there was no thigh high leather boots and corset. What a let down! I thought I was gonna meet a true Domme.

_____________________________

I'm a lover of "what is", not because I'm a spiritual person, but because it hurts when I argue with reality. -- Bryon Katie
"You're humbly arrogant" -- sunshinemiss
officially a member of the K Crowd

(in reply to LadyPact)

Post #: 94

RE: First Time Meetings - 7/7/2012 6:31:45 PM

JeffBC

Posts: 5799
Joined: 2/12/2012
From: Canada
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder
Rape or violence or anything else brutal has never even crossed my mind when I was meeting men. I mean, I was meeting at a coffeeshop with tons of people around. Why would I be worried about rape in a crowd of people? LOL What was he going to do? Force me to have sex in front of about 30 other witnesses? LOL

Which, I'm going to make a guess, contributed greatly to you meeting Kana. I, for one, avoid women who think men are walking time bombs waiting to rape at the first opportunity. I mean seriously... I don't care what other attributes a woman has... why on god's green earth would I make myself a victim that way?

_____________________________

I'm a lover of "what is", not because I'm a spiritual person, but because it hurts when I argue with reality. -- Bryon Katie
"You're humbly arrogant" -- sunshinemiss
officially a member of the K Crowd

(in reply to littlewonder)

Post #: 95

RE: First Time Meetings - 7/7/2012 6:33:16 PM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: JeffBC

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact
To date, as far as I know, nobody has been disappointed in meeting Me.

I was fairly disappointed. When we met there was no thigh high leather boots and corset. What a let down! I thought I was gonna meet a true Domme.

Hey! I brought that shit. Somebody convinced Me to be naked in the hot tub. (You poor bastard.)

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to JeffBC)

Post #: 96

RE: First Time Meetings - 7/7/2012 6:38:29 PM

LaTigresse

Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

quote:

ORIGINAL: JeffBC

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact
To date, as far as I know, nobody has been disappointed in meeting Me.

I was fairly disappointed. When we met there was no thigh high leather boots and corset. What a let down! I thought I was gonna meet a true Domme.

Hey! I brought that shit. Somebody convinced Me to be naked in the hot tub. (You poor bastard.)

Oh LadyP! Thank you for the snort laugh!

Poor bastard indeed!

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to LadyPact)

Post #: 97

RE: First Time Meetings - 7/7/2012 6:42:46 PM

ARIES83

Posts: 3648
Status: offline

My only experience with date rape drugs was, I was at a club
with this girl and her stepsister, one of my male friends got
kicked out I think, or was to drunk or something, anyway I had
to drive him home, I made sure the girls were ok for a way home
and said my goodbyes.
I found out the next day after I left someone had slipped the
stepsister something but seeing as her friends realised what was
happening the guy basicly just slipped away and left.

Was mixed emotions for me as I felt It was my fault for leaving
for awhile. But nothing major really happend thankfully.
It can happen so easy, and there are sleaze balls out there.

-ARIES

_____________________________

530 DAYS

(in reply to LaTigresse)

Post #: 98

RE: First Time Meetings - 7/7/2012 6:51:46 PM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse
Oh LadyP! Thank you for the snort laugh!

Poor bastard indeed!

Yes, poor Jeff really has seen Me naked. Fair trade. I watched him getting a blowjob.

Carol is quite lovely.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to LaTigresse)

Post #: 99

RE: First Time Meetings - 7/7/2012 8:13:28 PM

littlewonder

Posts: 15659
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: JeffBC

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder
Rape or violence or anything else brutal has never even crossed my mind when I was meeting men. I mean, I was meeting at a coffeeshop with tons of people around. Why would I be worried about rape in a crowd of people? LOL What was he going to do? Force me to have sex in front of about 30 other witnesses? LOL

Which, I'm going to make a guess, contributed greatly to you meeting Kana. I, for one, avoid women who think men are walking time bombs waiting to rape at the first opportunity. I mean seriously... I don't care what other attributes a woman has... why on god's green earth would I make myself a victim that way?

Yup. Even though I've been raped once and kidnapped and assaulted never stopped me from meeting men or looking at men like at any time I will be raped or hurt or killed or leave me in pieces after a heartbreak and then call him names and make sure everyone knew that I will never ever trust a man ever again.

Things happen. If I'm going to hold men responsible for my hurt then I may as well do the same with women, children, pastors, parents, etc....for all my hurts and injuries as well because those have happened with every single one of those in my life as well....but here's the thing. Life goes on and just because maybe 1% of those around me are bad people does not justify my being paranoid for the rest of my life. I really do feel bad for men because it seems so many men will never get a chance to meet women and are held accountable for the actions of former men in someone's life. But I also feel bad for men as well since so many are paranoid that if they even touch up against a girl she'll scream rape.

So now you have a society that is afraid to even look at each other let alone meet at a coffee shop or even talk to each other online. It's just all absurd imo.

_____________________________

Nothing has changed
Everything has changed

(in reply to JeffBC)

Post #: 100

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