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looking for a mistress in NY - 7/16/2012 11:07:35 PM   
zsa1993


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Joined: 4/18/2012
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Hi, my name is zach i am 18 years old and i have been into the BDSM life style for quite a while now doing a lot of things on my own such as bondage, cbt, spanking, anal, and a lot of other things and now i finally want that i actually want to be owned by somebody. I am looking for a mistress or couple who would dominate me and make me their servant to please them any way they want and especially if they want make me their sissy maid.�I am physically fit, i have short black hair, brown eyes, and willing to serve. I am into a lot of things and have almost no limits what so ever no joke lol.
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RE: looking for a mistress in NY - 7/16/2012 11:17:06 PM   
MalcolmNathaniel


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This is the discussion forum. Go to the personals (also known as "The Other Side") for this please.

Edited to add:

It is generally considered good netiquette to actually lurk on a site to get an idea how how it works. Had you done this simple thing you would not have to be told this. You should make an effort to do that on _every_ site, not just here. This is like saying 'please' and 'thank you.'

< Message edited by MalcolmNathaniel -- 7/16/2012 11:19:28 PM >

(in reply to zsa1993)
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RE: looking for a mistress in NY - 7/16/2012 11:54:20 PM   
CRYPTICLXVI


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As much to do with "General BDSM" as this thread.

(in reply to MalcolmNathaniel)
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RE: looking for a mistress in NY - 7/17/2012 12:29:35 AM   
MalcolmNathaniel


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Talking to me or the OP?

It can be hard to tell within the first few posts.

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RE: looking for a mistress in NY - 7/17/2012 12:39:30 AM   
CRYPTICLXVI


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quote:

ORIGINAL: MalcolmNathaniel

Talking to me or the OP?

It can be hard to tell within the first few posts.

The OP...sorry.

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RE: looking for a mistress in NY - 7/17/2012 12:40:54 AM   
AthenaSurrenders


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I think he was talking to the OP.

OP: No personal ads on the forums. It's against the rules and pisses everyone off. If you want to impress people enough to talk to you, read the threads and try to make some thoughtful posts that aren't about what you hope someone will do to you. Malcolm's advice about netiquette is sound.

Also: you probably don't want to emphasize being into this for 'quite a while' when you are 18. Because generally people don't count (or want to think about) your experiences in high school or whilst underage. I know you may have been fantasizing about this for years but it makes you look like you are trying to seem more experienced than you are, which puts a lot of people off.

Drop the 'no limits'. You may not have found your limits yet, and that's fine. You may have some extreme fantasies. But until you try this stuff out you don't know. It might be that the first hit of a crop drastically changes your perception of what you can handle. I know it changed mine. It makes you look immature like you are trying to sell yourself as super-hardcore. Which you may turn out to be, but you won't get to find out if you oversell. (If on the other hand you would happily eat puke for breakfast and wrestle grizzly bears in your tightie-whities, I retract this statement).

Lastly, 'lol' also makes you look immature. At 18 you are at the very youngest end of what is allowed on this site. Chances are most people viewing your profile will be older. They won't be interested if you don't seem mature for your age.

Just some friendly advice from someone else who started young.

Edit: after looking at your profile further, get rid of all the 'experts'. There's no way you are an expert at even a fraction of those things if you've been doing this alone .Call yourself a shibari expert when you are being invited to run demos and seminars. I would be skeptical of a fifty year old who claimed to be an expert in more than one or two things. You're not fooling anyone. Fantasizing about something a lot doesn't make you an expert, or all of us here would be world class. Once again, there's nothing wrong with being new or young. We all are at some point. There is something wrong with misrepresenting yourself as having more experience than you really do. It's called lying.

< Message edited by AthenaSurrenders -- 7/17/2012 12:43:56 AM >


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RE: looking for a mistress in NY - 7/17/2012 1:23:51 AM   
GreedyTop


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WHat AThena said....

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RE: looking for a mistress in NY - 7/17/2012 3:20:10 AM   
Killerangel


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This does belong in intros but I'm kind of glad it's not there because we *have* to be nice there- its a rule. Good call on Athena for looking up your profile and seeing the hypocrisy that lies within. Holy Batman Zach, are you *really* an EXPERT at so many things? Maybe the word expert doesn't mean what I thought it did. At 18 you've managed to pretty much conquer the world. It pretty much looks like if you think you knew what the word meant or you'd heard of it once then you marked it as expert.

The BDSM interests alone I'll call BS on and call it a day. So you're an expert at hypnosis? Wow, some people study that for years. You must have been taking classes while watching cartoons at the same time. Giving massage too is a trained skill, some people go to school to do it for a couple of years-glad to see how versatile you are. I won't even go into how ludicrous it is that you are a golf, swimming, and tennis expert as well as walking, but a lifestyle BDSM expert, shibari, spankings, wax play, and corsets too, the mind boggles. Romance novel expert. Vampirism expert. Cartoon expert (oh wait, that one doesn't surprise me). It just goes on and on with your body of knowledge.

Why am I busting your chops here? Because it's freaking dangerous in BDSM land to lie about what you know about and what you don't . If you had any experience at all you'd know this little fact.

I'll be your Mistress for the day...
Go immediately to your profile and take off all of the BS. All of it. No more expert designations except for cartoons and arcade games. TAke off the mention that you've been doing BDSM for quite a while, because it's blatant lying. Now....go to the intro section and write an intro that tells us about the real you, no kinky wish lists or pleas for Domination- you may however list fun things you are doing this summer. After that you may if you wish send out a couple of well thought out emails to women in your area that are pleasant, and cordial, and are socially acceptable- no fucking offers to let people do whatever they want to you. Over your summer vacation from school you will set a goal to learn more about the things you checked off on your interest list so you have a basic idea of what's up and then you can designate those things as 'beginner'.

Go...and may the force be with you...

(in reply to zsa1993)
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RE: looking for a mistress in NY - 7/17/2012 5:47:04 AM   
DarkSteven


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AthenaSurrenders got it perfectly. The only things I'd add refer to your picture.

1. Put a shirt on. Your chest isn't going to impress anyone.
2. That might be the first time I've ever seen a man's pic with stuff in the background that is actually neatly arranged. Good job.

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

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RE: looking for a mistress in NY - 7/17/2012 7:33:14 AM   
QueenRah


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Joined: 6/3/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Killerangel

Now....go to the intro section and write an intro that tells us about the real you, no kinky wish lists or pleas for Domination- you may however list fun things you are doing this summer. After that

(changing your profile to reflect your actual self, not the made-up fantasy self), - QR's edit

you may, if you wish, send out a couple of well-thought-out emails to women in your area that are pleasant, cordial, and are socially acceptable- no fucking offers to let people do whatever they want to you.


You've been given some great advice. I hope you'll follow it. I must add the following; because, even though the advice of sending thoughtful emails is very sound, clear advice, some fellas (pronounced "fools") don't understand what they need to do, in order for those emails to be well-thought:

FFS - READ THEIR PROFILES, FIRST!! Yes, I'm yelling. I cannot count the number of dumb-bunnies that, clearly, did not bother to find out what kind of person I am, nor what appeals to me. I know I am not alone. Very, very rarely is an introductory email more than a "Do me" wish-list. If you wish to make a good impression, do some homework and make the effort to get to know her, insofar as her profile tells. Show her that you care enough about her as a human being to find connection in your and her interests - not kinks! (You see if those match, then leave it alone.)

And good luck!

QR


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RE: looking for a mistress in NY - 7/17/2012 8:22:49 AM   
Delilya


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Listen to the others and best of luck in your journey.

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“Love me without fear, trust me without questioning, need me without demanding, want me without restrictions, accept me without changes, desire me without inhibitions"-Dick Sutphen

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RE: looking for a mistress in NY - 7/17/2012 8:54:23 AM   
Rochsub2009


Posts: 2536
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I looked at your profile, and it says that you're from Wayne, NY. I'm not sure where that is. I do know of a Wayne County in NY, but I don't think that's what you're talking about.

But depending on where you are in NY, there are lots of BDSM groups. NYC is full of them. There are also strong groups in Albany, Syracuse, Buffalo, and Rochester. Go to FetLife (if you're not already a member there), and do a search for your town. I'm sure you'll be able to find the group nearest you. And if you are in Wayne County, then you're not far from me. So send me a private message, and I'll get you hooked up with the local scene.

Also, as others have mentioned, please stop saying that you have lots of experience. You're 18. How much experience can you possibly have? Also, if you were referring to experience masturbating to BDSM porn and BDSM fantasies, that doesn't actually count as experience.

Despite how it may feel, people are not trying to hurt you (although there are probably some sadist who would love to) with their comments. They have given you some good feedback that will actually help you if you'll take the time to absorb it and act upon it.

Good luck in your search.

(in reply to zsa1993)
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RE: looking for a mistress in NY - 7/17/2012 11:58:56 AM   
searching4mysir


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Joined: 6/16/2011
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FR

As to the "no limits" thing. EVERYONE has limits. Give me 5 minutes and I can probably find at least 5 limits of yours...and I'm a sub, not a sadistic domme.

(in reply to Rochsub2009)
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RE: looking for a mistress in NY - 7/17/2012 2:22:04 PM   
RumpusParable


Posts: 1923
Joined: 7/7/2005
From: NYC now!
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You're from WAYNE, NY? I'm originally from the Keuka Lake area!

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I generally use fast-reply. If directing my post at someone specific I will indicate so.

Minimal summary: Artist, Disabled Veteran, Vegan, Pornographer, and Agender dominant female.

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RE: looking for a mistress in NY - 7/17/2012 9:42:44 PM   
CRYPTICLXVI


Posts: 3907
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quote:

ORIGINAL: searching4mysir

FR

As to the "no limits" thing. EVERYONE has limits. Give me 5 minutes and I can probably find at least 5 limits of yours...and I'm a sub, not a sadistic domme.


That made me chuckle... quite a bit.

(in reply to searching4mysir)
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RE: looking for a mistress in NY - 7/18/2012 8:43:13 PM   
zsa1993


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Joined: 4/18/2012
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sorry everyone i put it in the wrong section, and to Killer angle i did not understand when it ment by expert i thought it ment that you have done it.
to DarkSteven ik my chest was not impressive but i have worked on it a lot now and ty i take pride in cleanliness

(in reply to DarkSteven)
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RE: looking for a mistress in NY - 7/19/2012 8:27:53 AM   
OohAahMrs


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Joined: 7/14/2010
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Welcome zsa, hope you can last the pace, dollar wise, that is.

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You may choc the choc.........Oh forget it......

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