RE: Capping Self Reference Pronouns- Ego or Respect? (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion



Message

JanahX -> RE: Capping Self Reference Pronouns- Ego or Respect? (9/22/2012 12:40:19 PM)

Just wait till you come across the ones who like to talk in third person - those are the real gems.



MAINEiacMISTRESS -> RE: Capping Self Reference Pronouns- Ego or Respect? (9/22/2012 1:18:15 PM)

A lot of D/s people I meet online use caps not only as a sign of respect, but also to denote who is whom in the relationship. I personally see it in those terms, but also as a way to further separate from "vanilla" way of communicating, to enhance the D/s experience...to "wrap oneself in the moment", so to speak. We are in this to "ESCAPE", are we not?
I don't usually bother with W/we or U/us but I accept seeing it either way. If I'm going to start nit-picking about others' D/s, I can certainly think of more worthy things to go after.
MAINEiacMISTRESS



OsideGirl -> RE: Capping Self Reference Pronouns- Ego or Respect? (9/22/2012 1:39:09 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: MAINEiacMISTRESS

A lot of D/s people I meet online use caps not only as a sign of respect, but also to denote who is whom in the relationship. I personally see it in those terms, but also as a way to further separate from "vanilla" way of communicating, to enhance the D/s experience...to "wrap oneself in the moment", so to speak. We are in this to "ESCAPE", are we not?
I don't usually bother with W/we or U/us but I accept seeing it either way. If I'm going to start nit-picking about others' D/s, I can certainly think of more worthy things to go after.
MAINEiacMISTRESS


I think it's an internet affectation.

And no, I'm not in this to "escape". I'm in this because living my life with him in control makes me happy.



angelikaJ -> RE: Capping Self Reference Pronouns- Ego or Respect? (9/22/2012 2:04:09 PM)

All anyone has to do is read the link in my sig-line to know where I fall with this, but it isn't a general rule for me.
It is specific to Him, not because He is [my] dominant partner but moreso because it pertains to the depth of feeling I have for His Ownership of me.

Too, there is something profoundly moving when He addresses me as His sweet (pet name) specific to me.
It is not just a claiming, but a validation of connection and belonging-ness.



littlewonder -> RE: Capping Self Reference Pronouns- Ego or Respect? (9/22/2012 4:34:42 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl


quote:

ORIGINAL: MAINEiacMISTRESS

A lot of D/s people I meet online use caps not only as a sign of respect, but also to denote who is whom in the relationship. I personally see it in those terms, but also as a way to further separate from "vanilla" way of communicating, to enhance the D/s experience...to "wrap oneself in the moment", so to speak. We are in this to "ESCAPE", are we not?
I don't usually bother with W/we or U/us but I accept seeing it either way. If I'm going to start nit-picking about others' D/s, I can certainly think of more worthy things to go after.
MAINEiacMISTRESS


I think it's an internet affectation.

And no, I'm not in this to "escape". I'm in this because living my life with him in control makes me happy.




This



littlewonder -> RE: Capping Self Reference Pronouns- Ego or Respect? (9/22/2012 4:39:00 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: chatterbox24

I think the new standard should be the Subs name is capitalized, and the doms name is left tiny. Cause Subs actually rule the world ya know. [:D]



[8|]

[sm=banghead.gif][sm=zipmouth.gif]



Speliologist794 -> RE: Capping Self Reference Pronouns- Ego or Respect? (9/22/2012 5:32:50 PM)

To me it is an indication of insecurity in your own sense of worth as a dominant. It's like wearing a T-shirt with "He man" on the front.

It shouldn't be necessary. Your words and the attitudes you convey in your writing should be sufficient to inform your readers as to your dominance or lack of it. To have to capitalize words such as "me" and "my" is just an indication that you aren't really sure of your dominance and need to reassure yourself as much as to impress your readers.

It seems to happen most with the "On yer knees, bitch!" crowd and is really a bit pathetic.

Sean



littlewonder -> RE: Capping Self Reference Pronouns- Ego or Respect? (9/22/2012 5:34:45 PM)

orrr..it could just mean he's traditional from the days when it was extremely common to use caps and uncapped for names, just like for some people it's traditional to use certain formal protocols. I don't see how it makes you insecure.


I feel like I'm aging myself with stuff like this lol....caps, uncapped, protocols, the alt.forums. mIRC chat, Prodigy and AOL bdsm chats....




Speliologist794 -> RE: Capping Self Reference Pronouns- Ego or Respect? (9/22/2012 5:54:27 PM)

Baby calls me Daddy or Sir, (note capital letters), but that's between her and me (note lack of capital letter!). What you do in private is different than what you do when, for example, writing on the forums. To use capitals for the personal pronouns "me" and "my" outside of your relationship or relationships when speaking of oneself is indicative of something missing, probably self confidence. Even using them inside doesn't say much for your self confidence, either.




angelikaJ -> RE: Capping Self Reference Pronouns- Ego or Respect? (9/22/2012 5:59:01 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Speliologist794

To me it is an indication of insecurity in your own sense of worth as a dominant. It's like wearing a T-shirt with "He man" on the front.

It shouldn't be necessary. Your words and the attitudes you convey in your writing should be sufficient to inform your readers as to your dominance or lack of it. To have to capitalize words such as "me" and "my" is just an indication that you aren't really sure of your dominance and need to reassure yourself as much as to impress your readers.

It seems to happen most with the "On yer knees, bitch!" crowd and is really a bit pathetic.

Sean


It is your opinion to which you are entitled but it is very narrow thinking.
[My] Master is as far from an "On yer knees, bitch!" Dom as can be.

He is not insecure.
Our use of caps, as already mentioned, is personal.



Speliologist794 -> RE: Capping Self Reference Pronouns- Ego or Respect? (9/22/2012 6:55:29 PM)

angelika,

I completely agree that how you use the pronouns or names between yourselves is entirely your business. As I said above, baby uses capitals when writing to me and it's an indication of her, agreed and accepted, status, but only within our relationship.

However, were I to refer to myself as "Me" or to refer to my possessions, such as baby, as "Mine" in a forum such as this one, I'd be showing a degree of hubris that's really indefensible. It's also very silly!

I think we're violently agreeing with each other!

Sean



littlewonder -> RE: Capping Self Reference Pronouns- Ego or Respect? (9/22/2012 7:25:53 PM)

I see people who use Sir or Master or cap a person's name that isn't their dom but it really doesn't bother me because I figure they are traditional like me but even moreso that they probably came out of the same time as protocol as I did.

While personally I only do this for Master and I, but if he told me to do so for someone else because they were someone he respects or likes, then I would and if I knew someone online that I felt the same towards then I would use it for them as well.

I don't see it as all that big a deal. The ones around I see who think it's stupid or means someone is insecure are usually the newbies or those who are young and don't know anything about the traditional bdsm ways that were normal for back in those times.



Speliologist794 -> RE: Capping Self Reference Pronouns- Ego or Respect? (9/22/2012 7:44:12 PM)

"newbies or those who are young and don't know anything about the traditional bdsm ways that were normal for back in those times."

Well, speaking as one who is neither a "newby" nor young, but also as someone who has little if any regard for traditional BDSM, whatever that may be, I'd say you are attempting an ad hominem defense. If you can't defeat the argument, turn on the arguer.

I still find the use of capitalized personal first person pronouns to be a sign of insecurity, pompous and very silly. Still, that's only the opinion of someone who isn't, never has been, nor ever wanted to be part of "traditional BDSM".

For the sake of those among us who may not be familiar with the tenets of "traditional BDSM", could you define and describe it to us, please? Oh, and what times were those?



OsideGirl -> RE: Capping Self Reference Pronouns- Ego or Respect? (9/22/2012 7:49:43 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder
The ones around I see who think it's stupid or means someone is insecure are usually the newbies or those who are young and don't know anything about the traditional bdsm ways that were normal for back in those times.


As someone that was around during those times: I don't view that as "traditional BDSM ways". I think of it as internet/cyber stuff. I don't put a lot of importance on cyber behavior which has no impact on real life BDSM, D/s. It was just some dumb protocol that someone made up for the internet.



littlewonder -> RE: Capping Self Reference Pronouns- Ego or Respect? (9/22/2012 8:09:37 PM)

well being that I ran an mIRC bdsm chat room and munch back in those days, it was standard for such places and even offline when people would write their names on things such as nametags or lists it was still written that way. For us the online was just an extension and a way to organize offline groups. It just made identification easier. Even on here, I sometimes don't know if the person I'm speaking to is a Dom/me or sub because it's not standard on here. The only way I know is when I go to click on their profile on the other side. How I respond to a Dom/me may sometimes be different in how I respond to a sub on here depending on the question asked and by who.



MistressDarkArt -> RE: Capping Self Reference Pronouns- Ego or Respect? (9/22/2012 8:28:39 PM)

Personally, I view capitalizing Me, My, Mine, You, Your, etc...out of turn in correct sentence structure to be a pretentious, narcissistic bastardization of the English language. It's jarring to read. I can't avoid the gut reaction that whomever is using it thinks they are above and beyond proper written English. In the case of using lower case for names I find it especially difficult to determine what or whom the writer is talking about; the proper noun doesn't stand out the way it should.

That said, there are a few folks here who do it whom I like, respect and don't think of as asshats. To me it's the written version of conversing with someone who has Lazy Eye syndrome; I'm never sure exactly where to look while they are speaking but I like what they have to say nonetheless.

If it is an old tradition based on ancient message board/chatroom protocols, I hope it dies a sputtering death sooner than later. It's bad enough we have to deal with text speak. What attempts to pass for written language these days is appalling. [>:]



xXsoumisXx -> RE: Capping Self Reference Pronouns- Ego or Respect? (9/22/2012 8:59:04 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

It's been a while since we've had this one.

One of the best posters that we ever had here wrote in third person speech. I can only imagine what would have been lost if she were on the boards these days.



yes, i miss beth too! and yes she is a real gem and speaks in 3rd person because her Master/Owner requires it. It doesn't diminish her in any way. In fact does the opposite.
I started out in msn and yahoo chatrooms. The first time i ventured into a bdsm chatroom i was told that i should make a new nick that was lowercase if i was submissive. I did that, and it did help to determine who was who in the chat rooms. Over the years it has fallen out of favor on message boards.
I met my Master in one of those chat rooms in 2002. My Master still preferes the caps. He likes it. It gives Him pleasure when W/we text. I use it for Him. I think of it as a service, one small thing i can do for Him several times a day even if life has gone to hell in a handbasket..there is always that one small thing.
I like that Lady Pact uses them too, as She is someone i respect.

I don't generally use them unless i am communicating with Him, as He does not require that i do.

I just think judgements belong elsewhere, not here, on sites that are for alternative lifestyles.



RemoteUser -> RE: Capping Self Reference Pronouns- Ego or Respect? (9/22/2012 9:18:30 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

orrr..it could just mean he's traditional from the days when it was extremely common to use caps and uncapped for names, just like for some people it's traditional to use certain formal protocols. I don't see how it makes you insecure.


I feel like I'm aging myself with stuff like this lol....caps, uncapped, protocols, the alt.forums. mIRC chat, Prodigy and AOL bdsm chats....


Crystal Palace?

Iron Rose?

[:D]

(Old stomping grounds.)



xXsoumisXx -> RE: Capping Self Reference Pronouns- Ego or Respect? (9/22/2012 9:42:57 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: RemoteUser


quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

orrr..it could just mean he's traditional from the days when it was extremely common to use caps and uncapped for names, just like for some people it's traditional to use certain formal protocols. I don't see how it makes you insecure.


I feel like I'm aging myself with stuff like this lol....caps, uncapped, protocols, the alt.forums. mIRC chat, Prodigy and AOL bdsm chats....


Crystal Palace?

Iron Rose?

[:D]

(Old stomping grounds.)



Slave Market? can't recall if that's the right name.. they had slave auctions...lol.
and as for aging myself.. i didn't get my first computer until 2000, had MSN on a 2 yr contract. that was after Prodigy, and I never did Irc, seemed complicated to me.



littlewonder -> RE: Capping Self Reference Pronouns- Ego or Respect? (9/22/2012 9:45:40 PM)

I remember all of those. I got my first computer in 1995 and was on bdsm sites from the very beginning starting with Prodigy. What fun. lol



Page: <<   < prev  1 2 [3] 4 5   next >   >>

Valid CSS!




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy
0.03125