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dogthing -> RE: Humiliation vs Degradation (5/6/2007 3:43:59 PM)
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"Degradation" is about "de-grading" or "down-grading" your status, position, how you appear or are seen, or people's opinions of you (perhaps including your own)
"Humiliation" (n) is an internal reaction or conflict felt when doing something that you find embarrassing or uncomfortable, which may well involve degradation. Some people may feel humiliated at expressing their feelings if it puts them in an awkward situation, even if they feel that its not degrading. They might be proud but still embarrassed.
Humiliation without degradation Some people find having to apologise to someone after they've wronged them to be deeply humiliating, but its not really “degrading” in the conventional sense except that it involves admitting that you've done something that deserves an apology and admitting to yourself that you aren't all that better than other people.
Degradation without humiliation While degradation would be humiliating to most people it might not be humiliating to others. Being turned into a pet or slave or object is a "downgrade" in most ways, but some people will eagerly accept that role and get off on the dehumanisation as a fun sexy thing without feeling at all humiliated. A passive slave may not feel humiliated or embarrassed at being treated in ways that most other people would find humiliating. They might not feel that what they are doing is degrading, or they might know but not care.
Degradation and humiliation Others will seek out that same situation and get off on the internal conflict and shame that they feel at doing and enjoying something that they feel deep down to be wrong and perverted. The raised heart-rate, the flush of blood, the knotty feeling in the pit of the stomach. Knowing that you are getting off on it and accepting that you are “that sort of person” may make it feel even more wrong, and perverted, and humiliating. It's the emotional equivalent of "pain play", except the pain that they are revelling in is "psychological" rather than physical. Edge players and thrill seekers do something similar, except the elevated physiological reaction that they are seeking is driven by a sense of fear or risk or panic or of being involved in some sort of active transgression rather than by embarrassment.
Transition In a long-term relationship involving degradation and “training”, the sub might feel deeply humiliated by their degradation to start with, but the training may be designed to help them to acclimatise and begin to see it as “normal”. They start off feeling that what they are doing is sick and they end up just enjoying it. The humiliation is burned out of them leaving them accepting their position wholeheartedly and without shame. During the transition there can be an additional degree of degradation and humiliation for them in being able to see themselves changing and in seeing their old values slipping away, knowing that they are inevitably turning into the sort of “dirty freak” (as they see it) who sees nothing wrong with that behaviour. This sensation of feeling oneself being changed into a freak and partly wanting it can also involve a sense of fear, risk, panic, transgression etc. as mentioned above.
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