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Cuckold humiliation arousal thoughts and musings - 10/23/2012 4:03:52 PM   
AAkasha


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I'm curious about a few variations of the dynamic and would be interested to hear from actual submissives who have a bonafide cuckold fetish and femdoms who have played in this dynamic to see if the fetish crosses over at all into any of these possible variations. You'll see where I am going with this.

1. As a cuckold, are you aroused when forced to watch your femdom partner enjoy viewing/getting off on another man who is not physically present, but still has her attention -- ie, on a web cam, on the phone? Or does the fetish HAVE to include a living, breathing presence of a man to fulfill the fantasies of her engaging in intimacy with another man (ie, cock in pussy, penetration, or her sexual fulfillment being in the flesh).

2. Same as above, but getting even LESS intimate. Does your cuckold fetish receive any satisfaction or arousal if your femdom partner is watching/enjoying male porn, for example and getting off on it while ignoring you deliberately, or comparing you to the man on screen and discussing your inadequacies, if that is your fetish?

3. Taking #2 even further, does your cuckolding "hot button" get pushed at all if your femdom partner comments on/fawns over another man in an even vanilla context -- a hot actor in a movie you just saw with her, her talking about "how she wishes he would fuck her hard," etc.?

I recognize there are extreme differences in what a cuckold pursues for pleasure. Some seem to really seek out the ultimate satisfaction for his partner, even at his expense, while others have a humiliation fetish related to being sexually "down on the list" while another man is able to provide sexual pleasure.

Akasha

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RE: Cuckold humiliation arousal thoughts and musings - 10/24/2012 12:25:27 AM   
subbydream


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1. Yes. Absolutely arousing if its in the flesh, or on the phone, webcam, text message, facebook, twitter, ditter you name it. Each has its own unique arousal points to to it due to sensory deprivation, i.e. on the phone, I can't hear what he is saying on the other end of the line.

2. Yes. I loved worshipping my ex-girlfriends body as she ignored me and got off on porn on her tablet in bed :)

3. Yes. Completely! My mind immediately pictures her holding me close and breathing heavy as she is "fucked hard" by this "hot actor"

Ask me more :)

(in reply to AAkasha)
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RE: Cuckold humiliation arousal thoughts and musings - 10/24/2012 12:33:12 PM   
VioletViolence


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The closest I've ever gotten to cuckolding was having an online penpal who I'd describe my escapades to and he'd get off on imagining these other men having sex with the woman he wanted but couldn't have. But my "cuckolding" fantasies are a bit different than the "inadequate loser with a small, caged dick" that seems to be the norm.

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RE: Cuckold humiliation arousal thoughts and musings - 10/24/2012 3:55:16 PM   
LookieNoNookie


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quote:

ORIGINAL: VioletViolence

The closest I've ever gotten to cuckolding was having an online penpal who I'd describe my escapades to and he'd get off on imagining these other men having sex with the woman he wanted but couldn't have. But my "cuckolding" fantasies are a bit different than the "inadequate loser with a small, caged dick" that seems to be the norm.


I don't think I'd agree that's the norm.

It might be the one most publicized, the one getting press....I don't think it's the one that fits most cuckolds.

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RE: Cuckold humiliation arousal thoughts and musings - 10/24/2012 4:38:21 PM   
ToyOfRhamnusia


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I get off by seeing my mistress enjoying having a good time. I know she is a flirt and loves variation in sex, and she loves demonstrating her freedom of choice to me, while controlling me and my choices. She blossoms in the role of "Queen of Call Girls", and I love to see her enjoying it. It is important to me that she breaks society's prudery rules and social fidelity standards, and that I am witnessing that she does so. I want to be her "partner in crime" when she behaves like a slut.

If I am not SEEING it, when it happens, in the flesh, it gives me nothing but a sense of frustration coming from feeling distanced from her - and I don't think our relationship would last long if she would do it behind my back, or hidden from me. I know, many men are turned on by just knowing or hearing about her having sex with others, but that gives me absolutely nothing but a reason for divorce.

And if she seriously would feel more attracted to web cam games compared to having sex with me, I would be sincerely pissed of and most likely make an end to the relationship.

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RE: Cuckold humiliation arousal thoughts and musings - 10/25/2012 12:41:34 PM   
VioletViolence


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quote:

ORIGINAL: LookieNoNookie


quote:

ORIGINAL: VioletViolence

The closest I've ever gotten to cuckolding was having an online penpal who I'd describe my escapades to and he'd get off on imagining these other men having sex with the woman he wanted but couldn't have. But my "cuckolding" fantasies are a bit different than the "inadequate loser with a small, caged dick" that seems to be the norm.


I don't think I'd agree that's the norm.

It might be the one most publicized, the one getting press....I don't think it's the one that fits most cuckolds.


By "norm" I meant the most visible expression of the fetish that's out there. And I'm not just basing my views off of porn and such, but actual conversations with men who have wanted to include cuckolding in the D/s relationship. An overwhelming percentage said that they want humiliation, long term chastity and to be made to feel "useless" to their partner. To each their own and all, but that doesn't seem like too much fun to me.

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RE: Cuckold humiliation arousal thoughts and musings - 10/25/2012 3:06:04 PM   
Domin8me2025


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To me, the humiliation is what makes it cuckolding.

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RE: Cuckold humiliation arousal thoughts and musings - 10/25/2012 4:05:19 PM   
LookieNoNookie


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quote:

ORIGINAL: VioletViolence


quote:

ORIGINAL: LookieNoNookie


quote:

ORIGINAL: VioletViolence

The closest I've ever gotten to cuckolding was having an online penpal who I'd describe my escapades to and he'd get off on imagining these other men having sex with the woman he wanted but couldn't have. But my "cuckolding" fantasies are a bit different than the "inadequate loser with a small, caged dick" that seems to be the norm.


I don't think I'd agree that's the norm.

It might be the one most publicized, the one getting press....I don't think it's the one that fits most cuckolds.


By "norm" I meant the most visible expression of the fetish that's out there. And I'm not just basing my views off of porn and such, but actual conversations with men who have wanted to include cuckolding in the D/s relationship. An overwhelming percentage said that they want humiliation, long term chastity and to be made to feel "useless" to their partner. To each their own and all, but that doesn't seem like too much fun to me.


Cuckolding to a man is a varying thing, to some it means one thing, to others it means another.

In my (own) personal opinion, it's a fabulous thing, not because of lack but because of joy and love....and desire to see her in the throes.

And frankly, any man that doesn't want to see his woman in orgiastic exceptionalism, is....missing a bet.

Now if that ain't her gig then, as a man, it's your job to find out what is but....with that said, as a woman....it's your job to find out what sends him into the outer loop of the known galaxy as well.

That (in my opinion) is why we're here....to make (not "allow"...but actually cause) our mates (to) experience every known endorphin rush we can provide.

(Kinda seems like a decent plan to me anyway).

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RE: Cuckold humiliation arousal thoughts and musings - 10/25/2012 5:09:31 PM   
OralCuckGurl


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My Mistress would pretty much HAVE to cuckold me since I have erectile dysfunction. Funny....it seem so fitting that it doesn't bother me at all. :)

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RE: Cuckold humiliation arousal thoughts and musings - 10/25/2012 5:16:47 PM   
OralCuckGurl


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I just thought that I would share that with everyone....

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RE: Cuckold humiliation arousal thoughts and musings - 10/25/2012 6:52:11 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
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I do love that particular kink, however........

At this time, I will not be adding information to the discussion that will be posted on a pay site. Yeah, a bunch of people are going to bitch, especially the OP, but I'm not wiling to provide fodder for the paying customers in an enterprise where profit is being made by the originator.

It's great that you want to write stories, Aakasha. I sincerely hope that you do. The data collection to feed such fiction leaves a bad taste in My mouth. Especially since you collect such data for free, but the customers of your site pay.

In other words, you're not making a dime off of Me laying on My back.


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

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RE: Cuckold humiliation arousal thoughts and musings - 10/25/2012 6:56:31 PM   
AAkasha


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Joined: 11/27/2004
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Isn't it a little presumptuous to assume this is research for a story (I guess?) about cuckolding? Really?

I don't have a shortage of ideas for erotica. If I am going to write about cuckolding, I'd take it to the extreme end anyway, not the tame variations as discussed in this thread. The nature of these questions are for a personal situation I am working out, as I don't dabble in extreme forms of cuckolding on a regular basis.

I've been able to write for my site for 17 years without the help of collarme, I think I am doing fine coming up with content and ideas.

Akasha



_____________________________

Akasha's Web - All original Femdom content since 1995
Don't email me here, email me at [email protected]

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RE: Cuckold humiliation arousal thoughts and musings - 10/25/2012 6:57:30 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
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Was the info going towards anything for the site?

Is the site a non-profit?

ETA - By non-profit, I do mean an organization with tax exempt status.



< Message edited by LadyPact -- 10/25/2012 6:59:37 PM >


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to AAkasha)
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RE: Cuckold humiliation arousal thoughts and musings - 10/25/2012 7:01:16 PM   
AAkasha


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Joined: 11/27/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

Was the info going towards anything for the site?

Is the site a non-profit?
[/color]



No, the information is for a personal problem/challenge I am having with a submissive.

If I am going to write about cuckolding, I write to the extreme, like I did with Cruel Delilah, which is posted here for free:

http://www.collarchat.com/m_2719165/mpage_1/key_cruel%252Cdelilah/tm.htm#2719165

No, my site is a membership site. It was free from 1995 - 2005 until my content started getting stolen and I was advised by an attorney the best way to protect it was to put it behind a pay wall. There are a variety of other reasons in my FAQ. Ten years is a long time to provide free content.

My Good Girl's Guide to Female Domination is up in its entirety for free too. Thanks for giving me the opportunity to plug it:

http://akashaweb.com/updates/GoodGirlsFreePreview.html


Akasha



_____________________________

Akasha's Web - All original Femdom content since 1995
Don't email me here, email me at [email protected]

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RE: Cuckold humiliation arousal thoughts and musings - 10/25/2012 7:23:07 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
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If you need help with a *personal* submissive, I will treat you like anyone else. That's what leather people do. We don't share knowledge because royalty checks are coming in.

Even with this, I probably don't suit your purpose. I've only owned one cuck and I look at the kink in a different way than the majority. I see it as a woman owning her own sexuality. It's not the humiliation factor for Me. It has everything to do with Me, as a female, owning My own sexuality.

Oh, and for what it's worth, I provide free contenentn all of the time. I don't scrounge on boards when I present.

I know. My opinion sucks. I'm not some chick who drops in on the community when it serves her purpose.


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to AAkasha)
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RE: Cuckold humiliation arousal thoughts and musings - 10/25/2012 7:41:24 PM   
AAkasha


Posts: 4429
Joined: 11/27/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

If you need help with a *personal* submissive, I will treat you like anyone else. That's what leather people do. We don't share knowledge because royalty checks are coming in.

Even with this, I probably don't suit your purpose. I've only owned one cuck and I look at the kink in a different way than the majority. I see it as a woman owning her own sexuality. It's not the humiliation factor for Me. It has everything to do with Me, as a female, owning My own sexuality.

Oh, and for what it's worth, I provide free contenentn all of the time. I don't scrounge on boards when I present.

I know. My opinion sucks. I'm not some chick who drops in on the community when it serves her purpose.



I've been posting on BDSM message boards, long before CM, since 1996. My messages, under my previous address [email protected] as well, are very well archived and well known on alt.sex.femdom, soc.subculture.bondage-bdsm and others. I'm hardly a "fly-by-night" contributor to BDSM forums and collarme wasn't my first and isn't my only.

Your attitude toward me is kind of odd, but I'll leave you to it and wish you no ill.

Akasha


_____________________________

Akasha's Web - All original Femdom content since 1995
Don't email me here, email me at [email protected]

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RE: Cuckold humiliation arousal thoughts and musings - 10/25/2012 7:47:33 PM   
NakedHouseboy010


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I am flashing back to the Seinfeld / Kramer "cat fight" episode now.........

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RE: Cuckold humiliation arousal thoughts and musings - 10/25/2012 7:58:23 PM   
vincentML


Posts: 9980
Joined: 10/31/2009
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quote:

It's great that you want to write stories, Aakasha. I sincerely hope that you do. The data collection to feed such fiction leaves a bad taste in My mouth. Especially since you collect such data for free, but the customers of your site pay.

I find your reasoning curious, LP. Aakasha says she will be using the info feedback for a personal situation and not to write a story for profit. But what if she were collecting and writing for profit, hypothetically? Isn't that what all journalists and novelists do? They go out into the community of interest and ask questions without promising any recompense. And then use the data collected to publish a work for profit. I don't understand your objection. Puzzled.

(in reply to LadyPact)
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RE: Cuckold humiliation arousal thoughts and musings - 10/26/2012 3:14:07 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
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Question....

How many folks have that nice disclaimer about not being used ( and the word is USED) for independent studies on their profile?

quote:

They go out into the community of interest and ask questions without promising any recompense. And then use the data collected to publish a work for profit.


And yet, some people go out into the community, and for no other reason than to benefit the community, do the same thing. Ask the folks who are submitting articles to leatheratti.com if they are making money from it.

I have to ask you. Why is this different than anything else? How many times do we get "dommes" here who want other people to do their homework so they can suck money out of people? Asking us to teach them so they can put it up on some fucking site so people will pay them? No different than if I would do a demo for charity purposes and somebody coming along to record it and sell it off for $19.95 so they can pocket the cash.

It's not that I don't wish Aakasha the best in her endeavors. It's just that I object to adding input on data she may be collecting on a for-profit site. If that site was a non-profit, I'd write pages and pages for her and do everything that I could to further education in the kink community. As a for profit, I will abstain.

Call Me a cynic, but certain folks only 'pop up' when it benefits their bottom line. Since Aakasha has been a femdom since the eighties, I highly doubt she needs input from the likes of Me. She's got a huge readership on her site. I'm sure there are tons of folks who can help in this area.



_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to vincentML)
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RE: Cuckold humiliation arousal thoughts and musings - 10/26/2012 5:44:12 AM   
vincentML


Posts: 9980
Joined: 10/31/2009
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quote:

I have to ask you. Why is this different than anything else? How many times do we get "dommes" here who want other people to do their homework so they can suck money out of people? Asking us to teach them so they can put it up on some fucking site so people will pay them? No different than if I would do a demo for charity purposes and somebody coming along to record it and sell it off for $19.95 so they can pocket the cash.

I think the difference is this: Collarme is not a charity. It is a for-profit business whose advertising dollar is presumably based on the number of "views" it attracts. Collarchat is supported by the for-profit business on the other side. I don't see where there is an expectation of privacy here. Just the opposite in fact. Hence, the reason why people post with "handles," avatars, or no pics at all. These are public internet forums. The members participate for free. Any product one puts up here is subject to the whims of the greater internet 'community.' People who put disclaimers on their profiles are naive, I think. How are the disclaimers enforceable? They are not. This is the universal, international internet; not a neighborhood munch. The commercialism of this site is emphasized by the presence of findommes and prodommes on both sides, profiles and forums. A prodomme who participates in the forums, knowingly or not, is advertising herself on this side as well. Just my when we raise the white flag of bdsm purity and angrily question each others' motives we diminish the freedom we enjoy here.

< Message edited by vincentML -- 10/26/2012 6:38:51 AM >

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