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RE: Profile Feedback - 12/28/2012 2:22:23 PM

kalikshama

Posts: 14805
Joined: 8/8/2010
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More pictures!

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Post #: 21

RE: Profile Feedback - 12/28/2012 2:58:46 PM

TabooDominant

Posts: 13
Joined: 12/26/2012
Status: offline

Well I popped back out of curiosity and see further debate has been opened around Slave v Submissive!

I'm flattered you'd all like to see more pictures, I chose that one as a pure vanilla one is much more likely to be recognised outside of here and thats something I'd prefer not to happen unless it was on my own terms (job etc).

As for bratty v obedient, I have tried and enjoyed both so I'm not looking to make the distinction. The most important thing for me is that someone is themselves and then its about are they the right person for me - as well as am I the right person for them.

Its not designed to be some new wave BDSM (although the thought of eventing something sounds fun but unlikely!) more just a stripped back version. I've tried several wordings and I think this seems to fit me the best of the rewrites so far. I'm not green, I'm not community inducted either, but I have been doing this for around 10 years now despite my age. Started fairly green as everyone does but have done r/t and online, both long distance and local. I think though that everyone is still learning so I completely agree in that area, but whilst I am new to participating in this sort of environment I have been around for a little while.

Thank you for your feedback also though, I enjoy being challenged in my thoughts and seeing where that leads.

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Post #: 22

RE: Profile Feedback - 12/28/2012 3:02:40 PM

JeffBC

Posts: 5799
Joined: 2/12/2012
From: Canada
Status: offline

A bit of advice for what it's worth Taboo. My experience with Bambiboi is that he's a HIGHLY intuitive and intelligent individual. So at a minimum where he got it wrong you might want to ponder what words encouraged the mistake.

and the sub vs. slave thing was only because of some particular wording that BB suggested. I don't think we were reopening it in regards your actual profile. LOL, I was kind of hoping to not reopen it.

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Post #: 23

RE: Profile Feedback - 12/28/2012 3:10:33 PM

TabooDominant

Posts: 13
Joined: 12/26/2012
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: JeffBC

A bit of advice for what it's worth Taboo. My experience with Bambiboi is that he's a HIGHLY intuitive and intelligent individual. So at a minimum where he got it wrong you might want to ponder what words encouraged the mistake.

and the sub vs. slave thing was only because of some particular wording that BB suggested. I don't think we were reopening it in regards your actual profile. LOL, I was kind of hoping to not reopen it.

Thanks Jeff, will have a ponder indeed!

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Post #: 24

RE: Profile Feedback - 12/28/2012 7:12:48 PM

BambiBoi

Posts: 461
Joined: 8/10/2010
Status: offline

I've re-read your profile. I'm not sure if there were minor important edits since my last critique, but I can see language that suggests you recognize other ways to do WIITWD and have adopted your methods after consideration. No one likes being called green, and I think you found the most constructive side of that statement.

Jeff's kinds words made me blush, so I will take the guess work out of his suggestion. When I saw you describe what BDSM is to you, I felt you were speaking to the reader as though they had no idea what a healthy BDSM relationship entails. If someone was talking to me and started explaining basic concepts like limits and consent, I'd bite my lip not to say "You must be new here..." A more careful read of your words shows that this is what you feel is best for you, which is respectful to other walks of life. Maybe the pitfall is that you and I agree, so I felt so much goes without saying, which is my own downfall.

Regarding subs and slaves, I don't actually draw a distinction, but since your profile did say slave, I thought it might clear things up. It's a matter of taste, though I don't even bring it up because I consider it a non-issue.

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Post #: 25

RE: Profile Feedback - 12/29/2012 9:14:27 AM

TabooDominant

Posts: 13
Joined: 12/26/2012
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: BambiBoi

I've re-read your profile. I'm not sure if there were minor important edits since my last critique, but I can see language that suggests you recognize other ways to do WIITWD and have adopted your methods after consideration. No one likes being called green, and I think you found the most constructive side of that statement.

Jeff's kinds words made me blush, so I will take the guess work out of his suggestion. When I saw you describe what BDSM is to you, I felt you were speaking to the reader as though they had no idea what a healthy BDSM relationship entails. If someone was talking to me and started explaining basic concepts like limits and consent, I'd bite my lip not to say "You must be new here..." A more careful read of your words shows that this is what you feel is best for you, which is respectful to other walks of life. Maybe the pitfall is that you and I agree, so I felt so much goes without saying, which is my own downfall.

Regarding subs and slaves, I don't actually draw a distinction, but since your profile did say slave, I thought it might clear things up. It's a matter of taste, though I don't even bring it up because I consider it a non-issue.

Thanks Bambi, I appreciate the thoughts a lot. I always think its difficult to convey things in a short profile (feels like a CV) and certainly the intention isn't too seem like I am preaching, more to detail what I am after.

Thanks for taking the time and for the constructive opinions.

(in reply to BambiBoi)

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Post #: 26

RE: Profile Feedback - 12/29/2012 9:27:29 AM

TabooDominant

Posts: 13
Joined: 12/26/2012
Status: offline

Ok can someone help me here. I have sent out a few (15 or so) messages to girls on here I thought interesting. Each message was unique and not a copy and paste job.

I then get an email from Support saying I have activated a Spam filter and telling me it was nothing personal (which I'm sure it wasnt) but it then adds a header to each message I have spent the last 3 hours composing which I can't imagine will help anything much!!

What triggers this? Clearly quite a lot of the messages are to new people - being new to the site - but surely if each is unique and specific to the persons page then thats not spam.

Clearly a little frustrated after taking the time to get things organised before messaging out!

(in reply to kalikshama)

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Post #: 27

RE: Profile Feedback - 12/30/2012 12:43:20 PM

BambiBoi

Posts: 461
Joined: 8/10/2010
Status: offline

Taboo:

I can only speculate on how spam filters work here, so I'll spare you any guesswork.

What I am confident about is writing introduction letters and getting unreservedly denied even the courtesy of a "go fuck yourself," which would at least lend closure. I understand your question is "how can I avoid having my thoughtful, individualized letters sent to a bulk mail inbox?"

The help page only says "Why am I temporarily blocked from sending messages by the spam filter? Our spam filter monitors the onsite messages you send to other users and will be activated if it determines that you're sending out a large number of generic messages. To prevent the filter from activating we recommend that you take the time to read the profiles of the other users on the site and send a personalized message to those that interest you. This is also a great way to get good responses back." Which is unhelpful.

The best I can offer is to file a support ticket and see what can be resolved.

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Post #: 28

RE: Profile Feedback - 12/30/2012 12:47:26 PM

TheLilSquaw

Posts: 2340
Joined: 10/24/2012
From: Middle River, MD
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: TabooDominant

Ok can someone help me here. I have sent out a few (15 or so) messages to girls on here I thought interesting. Each message was unique and not a copy and paste job.

I then get an email from Support saying I have activated a Spam filter and telling me it was nothing personal (which I'm sure it wasnt) but it then adds a header to each message I have spent the last 3 hours composing which I can't imagine will help anything much!!

What triggers this? Clearly quite a lot of the messages are to new people - being new to the site - but surely if each is unique and specific to the persons page then thats not spam.

Clearly a little frustrated after taking the time to get things organised before messaging out!

I believe if you send out a certain amount of emails within a specific time period you trigger their spam filter.

I believe it goes away after a period of time with no sending out emails.

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Post #: 29

RE: Profile Feedback - 12/30/2012 5:24:46 PM

littlewonder

Posts: 15659
Status: offline

Whenever I hear others on here talking about how they send out numerous amounts of emails to others it makes me feel as if they are desperate and/or only looking at the photos of young hotties.

This says to me they are not choosey about who they go out with or fuck....anyone will do....anyone at all.

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Post #: 30

RE: Profile Feedback - 12/30/2012 5:26:40 PM

OsideGirl

Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline

Also, keep in mind that people that you have sent emails to can report those emails as spam. Some people will report the messages if you've ignored what is stated in their profiles.

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Post #: 31

RE: Profile Feedback - 1/1/2013 4:50:08 AM

TabooDominant

Posts: 13
Joined: 12/26/2012
Status: offline

Thanks again for the advice. I guess I'll just have to ensure I space out and future messages.

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Post #: 32

RE: Profile Feedback - 1/1/2013 12:04:44 PM

Winterapple

Posts: 1343
Joined: 8/19/2011
Status: offline

That you fancied you were here looking for
women but not online dating might be
the crux of your problem.

Someone who triggers the spam filter?
I generally think they're desperate,
only interested in getting laid, perhaps
mentally ill, a fake profile or a scammer.

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Post #: 33