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RE: She says she will not under any circumstances show ... - 12/31/2012 5:19:49 AM   
thishereboi


Posts: 14463
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quote:

ORIGINAL: ccc3333

I could care less if we are compatible... all i wanted to know is if you think it's weird to never see a picture prior to meeting someone?

C
quote:

ORIGINAL: SinFix

Sounds like you two just aren't compatible. You want a pic and she doesn't want to send you one... move on




I didn't give my ex a pic before we met and she didn't send me one. She told me what shirt she was wearing and it was really easy to spot her at the pizza place we picked. It wasn't a problem for either one of us. If it is that important to you I guess you will have to keep looking until you find someone who doesn't mind giving out her pic before the meet. Not everyone will.

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(in reply to ccc3333)
Profile   Post #: 61
RE: She says she will not under any circumstances show ... - 12/31/2012 5:22:01 AM   
lovethyself


Posts: 1818
Joined: 11/4/2012
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quote:

ORIGINAL: TheLilSquaw

If you are so interested in what she looks like, ask her to meet ya at StarBucks. She knows what you look like.




He mentions earlier that he already blew his chances with her (post #47). He doesn't seem very heartbroken about it either.

(in reply to TheLilSquaw)
Profile   Post #: 62
RE: She says she will not under any circumstances show ... - 12/31/2012 7:37:25 AM   
tj444


Posts: 7574
Joined: 3/7/2010
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quote:

ORIGINAL: ccc3333
what if... you get catfished? Put in 3 months of hard dialogue, you love the person, but then u have no physical attraction... some may be able to overcome it, others don't wish to deal with it... it's a long complex issue imo.


catfished??? never heard that described as that before..

that has happened to me even if i did see their pic.. cuz usually the pics (if they really are of them) is the best one and people are 3D, photos are one dimensional.. not to mention can be photoshopped..

really to me, a photo just sorta gives me a vague idea what the person looks like.. and an idea who i should be looking for.. more than once i have approached a guy only to find out, nope,.. he was not the guy i was waiting for.. haha

eta- thats why I prefer to meet very soon.. i dont like emailing for 3 months first..

< Message edited by tj444 -- 12/31/2012 7:41:15 AM >


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Profile   Post #: 63
RE: She says she will not under any circumstances show ... - 12/31/2012 9:08:15 AM   
TheLilSquaw


Posts: 2340
Joined: 10/24/2012
From: Middle River, MD
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quote:

ORIGINAL: lovethyself


quote:

ORIGINAL: TheLilSquaw

If you are so interested in what she looks like, ask her to meet ya at StarBucks. She knows what you look like.




He mentions earlier that he already blew his chances with her (post #47). He doesn't seem very heartbroken about it either.


perhaps she lucked out Lol


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(in reply to lovethyself)
Profile   Post #: 64
RE: She says she will not under any circumstances show ... - 12/31/2012 10:00:29 AM   
lmpishlilhellcat


Posts: 500
Joined: 8/25/2011
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quote:

ORIGINAL: ccc3333

It could even be a pic, of just the body ya know? i even said that... and she said "i wont do that."...

i was contacted by a member that saw my post and they did have a good point, being in the Govt, you could have a security clearance, and knowing what that is all about myself, i can see her point, but you still can put a body only pic...



I used to have my photo posted here, when I was young and I didn't have anything that mattered. However, now I work for a government organization. There is no chance in hell I would post my pic. I love my job and it isn't something I'm willing to risk on any level. If I were looking for something here, other than conversation, I would be extremely hesitant about sending my picture to anyone. Especially someone I have never met. My job is a sure thing, anything other than a quick meet up with a stranger isn't.

You have two choices either you like the person enough to accept that and move forward, or you don't and you move on.

_____________________________

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(in reply to ccc3333)
Profile   Post #: 65
RE: She says she will not under any circumstances show ... - 12/31/2012 10:28:48 AM   
ClassAct2006


Posts: 318
Joined: 4/12/2006
Status: offline
These sort of issues are so hard to resolve. I have had men not happy to send a picture but I will never meet anyone without (a) seeing his photograph as he might be obese or look like the back end of a bus or have a beard or just not be my type so I need to see that first (b) speaking on the telephone as voice is really important to me. I am happy to meet after doing that.

However everyone can set their own requirements. I don't disclose my identity until I have met someone or my first name and that really seems to annoy some men who say why don't I trust them. I would say why would you want a sub who was so stupid as to run risks? That it's a very positive sign and good thing that I refuse to as it shows I am not some idiot who risks her life all the time by telling all to strangers or indicates I have something to lose whereas had I no career, profile, children, just a job in Tesco and no children, nothing to lose if it were known how I am then the issues would be different. Many find all that terribly difficult to understand. They obviously have very low IQs.

(in reply to littlewonder)
Profile   Post #: 66
RE: She says she will not under any circumstances show ... - 12/31/2012 11:31:44 AM   
lapdog252


Posts: 3
Joined: 6/10/2006
Status: offline
i don't blame her . i don't either

(in reply to ccc3333)
Profile   Post #: 67
RE: She says she will not under any circumstances show ... - 12/31/2012 11:41:29 AM   
Baroana


Posts: 1480
Joined: 11/13/2011
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I wrote a longer response to this, but it got deleted somehow. In a nutshell, I expect photo exchange after a few emails if we're feeling each other. If a guy is too yellow bellied to send a basic goddamned picture, he isn't for me.

(in reply to lapdog252)
Profile   Post #: 68
RE: She says she will not under any circumstances show ... - 12/31/2012 11:52:20 AM   
WomanlyWiles


Posts: 166
Joined: 3/14/2012
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Baroana

I wrote a longer response to this, but it got deleted somehow. In a nutshell, I expect photo exchange after a few emails if we're feeling each other. If a guy is too yellow bellied to send a basic goddamned picture, he isn't for me.


I was just about to post the same thing. This is my kinky dating site. I need to fancy someone to meet them. I have a job where I can be struck off, so it's just a snap which could have come from anywhere. I don't talk to the invisible man.

When I started internet dating, I didn't ask for a pic upfront. I had two memorable instances. One eventually sent a pic and looked just like the living embodiment of Hen Broon (pictured below). The other assured me that he was a magnificently handsome chap, then sent a pic and he was just a guy. Not terrible, but completely ordinary.





Attachment (1)

(in reply to Baroana)
Profile   Post #: 69
RE: She says she will not under any circumstances show ... - 12/31/2012 2:31:58 PM   
seekingreality


Posts: 599
Joined: 8/11/2011
Status: offline
I've had this situation myself from the other perspective.

I've had dommes who state in their profile that they require you to send a photo. And after I've sent a photo, they refuse to send one of themselves but want me to answer all sorts of questions about myself.

I just tell them I am uncomfortable doing that for someone who wants to remain completely anonymous and yet expects to know what I look like. They generally become angry or never respond.

(in reply to WomanlyWiles)
Profile   Post #: 70
RE: She says she will not under any circumstances show ... - 12/31/2012 3:57:17 PM   
youdneverknowit


Posts: 26
Joined: 10/21/2012
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: seekingreality

I've had this situation myself from the other perspective.

I've had dommes who state in their profile that they require you to send a photo. And after I've sent a photo, they refuse to send one of themselves but want me to answer all sorts of questions about myself.

I just tell them I am uncomfortable doing that for someone who wants to remain completely anonymous and yet expects to know what I look like. They generally become angry or never respond.


I do not have a profile picture of myself. That is because of vocational issues. I am always suspicious of people who say, "If your first email to me doesn't include a pic of yourself, I will delete your message without reading it."

Of course, in my mind, I am thinking, "Why?"

It's not like I am unwilling to send a picture... I'm rather an attractive gentleman, but I kind of want to feel positive about the other person before so doing.

(in reply to seekingreality)
Profile   Post #: 71
RE: She says she will not under any circumstances show ... - 12/31/2012 5:05:15 PM   
irishgirl69


Posts: 3
Joined: 2/13/2010
Status: offline
SHe can or not.

Her right. Weird> Odd>normal? determined by society.

But she doesnt have too, that is the beauty of it.





(in reply to youdneverknowit)
Profile   Post #: 72
RE: She says she will not under any circumstances show ... - 12/31/2012 5:17:19 PM   
LookieNoNookie


Posts: 12216
Joined: 8/9/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ccc3333

Prior to meeting... she says she never ever gives out her picture ever prior to meeting.... for "identity reasons"

this sounds like a conartist.

***** is the screen name


Ya know...after all that....I'm not gonna give you her picture either.

(in reply to ccc3333)
Profile   Post #: 73
RE: She says she will not under any circumstances show ... - 12/31/2012 6:58:23 PM   
ccc3333


Posts: 156
Joined: 12/24/2012
Status: offline
:))))
quote:

ORIGINAL: TheLilSquaw


quote:

ORIGINAL: lovethyself


quote:

ORIGINAL: TheLilSquaw

If you are so interested in what she looks like, ask her to meet ya at StarBucks. She knows what you look like.




He mentions earlier that he already blew his chances with her (post #47). He doesn't seem very heartbroken about it either.


perhaps she lucked out Lol



(in reply to TheLilSquaw)
Profile   Post #: 74
RE: She says she will not under any circumstances show ... - 12/31/2012 7:04:33 PM   
ccc3333


Posts: 156
Joined: 12/24/2012
Status: offline
I really agree, you and a few other people changed my prospective on this issue. I now am ok without a pic, simply because i respect people do want to protect their jobs and careers etc. It's understandeable. Frankly, i think its a sign of intelligence, hence the changes to my profile :)

C
quote:

ORIGINAL: lmpishlilhellcat


quote:

ORIGINAL: ccc3333

It could even be a pic, of just the body ya know? i even said that... and she said "i wont do that."...

i was contacted by a member that saw my post and they did have a good point, being in the Govt, you could have a security clearance, and knowing what that is all about myself, i can see her point, but you still can put a body only pic...



I used to have my photo posted here, when I was young and I didn't have anything that mattered. However, now I work for a government organization. There is no chance in hell I would post my pic. I love my job and it isn't something I'm willing to risk on any level. If I were looking for something here, other than conversation, I would be extremely hesitant about sending my picture to anyone. Especially someone I have never met. My job is a sure thing, anything other than a quick meet up with a stranger isn't.

You have two choices either you like the person enough to accept that and move forward, or you don't and you move on.


(in reply to lmpishlilhellcat)
Profile   Post #: 75
RE: She says she will not under any circumstances show ... - 12/31/2012 11:36:03 PM   
lovethyself


Posts: 1818
Joined: 11/4/2012
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ccc3333

I really agree, you and a few other people changed my prospective on this issue. I now am ok without a pic, simply because i respect people do want to protect their jobs and careers etc. It's understandeable. Frankly, i think its a sign of intelligence, hence the changes to my profile :)

C



It is really nice to see that you are willing to accept other peoples perspective, and adapt accordingly when you see valid points made. It's a sign that you are maturing. I'm glad that you found some insight from all this, and didn't just get your back up because other people disagreed with you. Good luck in your search.

(in reply to ccc3333)
Profile   Post #: 76
RE: She says she will not under any circumstances show ... - 1/1/2013 5:44:28 AM   
GotSteel


Posts: 5871
Joined: 2/19/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ccc3333
Prior to meeting... she says she never ever gives out her picture ever prior to meeting.... for "identity reasons"

this sounds like a conartist.


I can understand people being hesitant to give out portrait shots to complete strangers on this site. Is that what you were looking for or is the same thing as your profile pic (i.e. hiding your face) cool? Because that should elevate her concerns about publishing her identity on the internet.


(in reply to ccc3333)
Profile   Post #: 77
RE: She says she will not under any circumstances show ... - 1/1/2013 11:35:32 AM   
seekingreality


Posts: 599
Joined: 8/11/2011
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: youdneverknowit


quote:

ORIGINAL: seekingreality

I've had this situation myself from the other perspective.

I've had dommes who state in their profile that they require you to send a photo. And after I've sent a photo, they refuse to send one of themselves but want me to answer all sorts of questions about myself.

I just tell them I am uncomfortable doing that for someone who wants to remain completely anonymous and yet expects to know what I look like. They generally become angry or never respond.


I do not have a profile picture of myself. That is because of vocational issues. I am always suspicious of people who say, "If your first email to me doesn't include a pic of yourself, I will delete your message without reading it."

Of course, in my mind, I am thinking, "Why?"

It's not like I am unwilling to send a picture... I'm rather an attractive gentleman, but I kind of want to feel positive about the other person before so doing.




I can understand why someone wants a photo first thing.

The reality is most people have a minimum level of physical attractiveness they expect in a partner. If you don't meet it, they don't really care about your personality. And the basic level of physical attractiveness can be ascertained with a photo in 5 seconds. That saves you from wasting time exchanging emails.

If you are a woman on this site and being inundated with dozens or more emails a day, I could see why you would demand a photo first thing as part of the basic sceening. Personally, I don't really want to exchange a lot of "getting to know you" emails only to then exchange photos and find out one of us isn't the other's cup of tea and we just wasted a lot of time.

(in reply to youdneverknowit)
Profile   Post #: 78
RE: She says she will not under any circumstances show ... - 1/1/2013 11:43:01 AM   
BDSMtortured


Posts: 3
Joined: 8/7/2012
Status: offline
I have gone with a friend that was meeting somebody for the first time. She would get a description of his Automobile, plate number, and a description of a picture of him. We would get there early and she would see what he looked like. If for some reason she didn't like the way he looked we would leave. Women have a lot of ways of protecting themselves.

(in reply to littlewonder)
Profile   Post #: 79
RE: She says she will not under any circumstances show ... - 1/1/2013 12:04:28 PM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14442
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: BDSMtortured

I have gone with a friend that was meeting somebody for the first time. She would get a description of his Automobile, plate number, and a description of a picture of him.
There's no way in hell I'd give a stranger a description of my car and plate number. You might as well give that person your home address.

quote:

We would get there early and she would see what he looked like. If for some reason she didn't like the way he looked we would leave. Women have a lot of ways of protecting themselves.


That's just rude. She doesn't like how he looks, so she bails. She's essentially standing him up. If someone takes the time, makes the effort and commitment to show up, you should at least have the manners and grace to present yourself, even if it's to say, "I'm sorry, I'm not feeling this".


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(in reply to BDSMtortured)
Profile   Post #: 80
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