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cyberbullying, victimhood and sports.. again! - 3/22/2013 7:06:40 PM   
Missokyst


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Joined: 9/9/2006
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On paper, it sounds awfully familiar.

Two high school football players accused of sexual assault. Fellow students who take to social media to defend the pair, taunting and blaming the victims. An athletic director who brushes aside the allegations—along with separate hazing, felony robbery and assault charges against the school's athletes—as "not any different than any other community." Administrators who are reluctant to immediately address the accusations, making it appear like a cover-up. The online hacktivist group Anonymous, which pledges to expose the truth and publicly shame those who engage in cyberbullying and victim-blaming.

Except this isn't Steubenville, Ohio—it's Torrington, Conn., where two 18-year-olds, Edgar Gonzalez and Joan Toribio, stand accused of second-degree sexual assault of two 13-year-old girls. The investigation has led to the arrest of a 17-year-old male for an alleged assault on one of the 13-year-olds last fall, and police say more arrests could be forthcoming.

Gonzalez and Toribio, who live in the same Torrington apartment complex, were arrested last month on sexual assault charges stemming from separate incidents that occurred around the same time period in February, a Torrington police official said on Wednesday. Both pleaded not guilty.

The investigation is ongoing, Torrington police say.

"It's very involved," Torrington Police Lt. Mike Emanuel told reporters on Wednesday. "It's very difficult to follow, even for us."


Joan Toribio and Edgar Gonzalez (Torrington Police)
The victims and their alleged attackers knew one another, Emanuel said. "The reason that this is a sexual assault is that there is more than a three-year age difference. That's what we have to keep in mind."

When asked if the sexual contact was consensual, Emanuel said, "Statutorily it is not consensual."

Gonzalez, who had already been facing felony robbery charges related to a March 2012 incident, is being held at a New Haven correction center. Toribio, who was charged with two counts of second-degree sexual assault and risk of injury to a minor, was released on $100,000 bond and is being electronically monitored.

Sealed by a Litchfield district court, the case had been kept under wraps by school officials until this week, when the Register Citizen reported that "dozens of athletes and Torrington High School students, male and female," taunted the alleged victims on Twitter:

Students flocked to social media in the days surrounding the arrests of Gonzalez and Toribio, with several students offering support for the two football players and others blaming the victims for causing the incident. References included calling a 13-year-old who hangs around with 18-year-olds a “whore,” and claiming the victims “destroyed” the lives of the players.

"Even if it was all his fault," Mary J. Ramirez, whose Twitter handle is @LoryyRamirez, wrote, "what was a 13 year old girl doing hanging around 18 year old guys[?]"

“I wanna know why there’s no punishment for young hoes,” Twitter user @asmedick wrote, according to the paper.

Torrington school officials said they would investigate the apparent cyberbullying.

"We’re doing everything we can to provide the safety [the alleged victims] need in schools,” Kenneth Traub, Torrington's Board of Education chairman, said on Wednesday.


Toribio and Gonzalez on the field last fall (Torrington High School/Facebook)
As was the case in Steubenville, Anonymous has gotten involved, launching "Operation Raider," a reference to the nickname of the Torrington High School football team.

“#OpRaider is the new #OpRollRedRoll," the group tweeted late Wednesday. "Torrington better take note of #Steubenville because they’re about to go on blast. #endrapeculture"

High school football takes on elevated importance in Torrington, a small town in northwest Connecticut about 35 miles north of Newtown. "Like Steubenville," Doug Barry wrote on Jezebel.com, the case in Connecticut "hinges in large part on the seemingly disproportionate influence a school’s football program has on the surrounding community."

Despite the felony robbery charges, Gonzalez was allowed to play football last fall.

“I reeled the kid in after that, and he walked the line," Dan Dunaj, Torrington's former head football coach, told the Register Citizen. "As a coach I was doing something right.”

Dunaj resigned in December amid an ongoing investigation into a hazing incident involving four football players earlier in the season. The players received five-day suspensions, but the status of the investigation remains unknown.

"If you think there's some wild band of athletes that are wandering around, then I think you're mistaken," Torrington High School Athletic Director Mike McKenna told the Register Citizen. "If you look at crime statistics, these things happen everywhere and we're not any different than any other community."

In an editorial published on Thursday, the Register Citizen blasted "the posture of denial and defensiveness" Torrington school officials have taken in response to the case:

More:


http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/lookout/torrington-steubenville-rape-assault-victim-twitter-163530296.html;_ylt=AuX9wvGOxdvACVOJzrt8PKfEeOd_;_ylu=X3oDMTVxanNpMHJrBGNjb2RlA2dtcHRvcDEwMDBwb29sd2lraXVwcmVzdARtaXQDQXJ0aWNsZSBNaXhlZCBMaXN0IE5ld3MgZm9yIFlvdSB3aXRoIE1vcmUgTGluawRwa2cDYTdiYzk5NjAtMTNjOS0zZDZhLTkzYjAtNGI1N2UzMjcyOTg1BHBvcwM1BHNlYwNuZXdzX2Zvcl95b3UEdmVyAzg3NGJlN2QwLTkyOTQtMTFlMi1iYmVkLTAxODEyZjU2YmVjOA--;_ylg=X3oDMTNpdWt0czNkBGludGwDdXMEbGFuZwNlbi11cwRwc3RhaWQDZWYyZTBmODYtOTRmMy0zNzE0LWFmNDMtM2I4MzQ5NGI1ZGMzBHBzdGNhdANibG9nc3x0aGVzaWRlc2hvdwRwdANzdG9yeXBhZ2UEdGVzdANUZXN0X0FGQw--;_ylv=3

_____________________________

pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding ~Gibran, Kahlil

“The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.”
― Bob Marley

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RE: cyberbullying, victimhood and sports.. again! - 3/22/2013 9:20:26 PM   
littlewonder


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I have mixed thoughts on this. Imo, if the 13 yr old consented, then imo, she's just as responsible....there's that silly little notion of self responsibility again. And no I don't think age 13 is too young. As for the rest...robbery and what not.....yeah, they should get whatever the consequences are for those issues.

I think we need to look at all parties and not just the boys being accused here.


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RE: cyberbullying, victimhood and sports.. again! - 3/22/2013 10:05:49 PM   
Missokyst


Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
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When I was 13 I used to walk over to long beach and hang out on the pier. I did it because I knew the last two classes too well and it was quite easy to cut. I did it because I had been raped the year earlier and it still weighed heavily on me. I needed the walk and the escape. On the pier I used to hang out with sailors. They knew how old I was and took great care to treat me like a little sister. Coming from a family that really believed girls are raped because of the way they dressed, and with a sister who protected my rapist, having those sailors take care of me was.. unforgettable. I named my son after one of them years later. They made sure no one treated me like anything other than a little sister and they would hire a cab and ride with me back to my home town.

Little girls, and I do think anyone who is 13 is still little are unwise. I would even say dumb, naive, and full of hormonal changes. I used to flirt with Sean *the one whose name I borrowed for my son*, but he ignored it and ruffled my hair, told me to behave and made sure no one ever messed with me. Men.. or boys as he was 17 at the time, used to be different. No.. that is incorrect. They were more cautious about jailbait. Now we have peer pressure, social networking and the rush to sex and publication to think about.

I do believe in personal responsibility. I don't believe in modifying it because social media directs. Or bullying someone because they made the choice to be there. I wore a cute little knit polkadot outfit in turquoise with lace at the collar and cuffs. Clothing did not make him rape me. I used to smile and hang out with older boys. That did not get me raped. What did happen was someone CHOSE to take my innocence. What then happened was I was pressured by my sister to keep quiet because people would talk. Sorry, but in the case of child vs adult, the older one always has more responsibility

_____________________________

pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding ~Gibran, Kahlil

“The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.”
― Bob Marley


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RE: cyberbullying, victimhood and sports.. again! - 3/23/2013 3:09:15 AM   
FrostedFlake


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From: Centralia, Washington
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Jailbait.

I wonder what that word means.

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RE: cyberbullying, victimhood and sports.. again! - 3/23/2013 4:58:36 AM   
freedomdwarf1


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Joined: 10/23/2012
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quote:

ORIGINAL: FrostedFlake

Jailbait.

I wonder what that word means.


From Merriam Webster - a girl under the age of consent with whom sexual intercourse is unlawful and constitutes statutory rape.

From my personal experience, I would re-define it as "A girl who is overtly promiscuous under the age of consent with whom sexual intercourse is unlawful and constitutes statutory rape but frequently mimics adult behaviour in order to contravene the law for her own sexual gratification".

My kids know several girls at the local school who are only 11-12 that have sex regularly "because they can".
I have seen some of them coming out of the school gates and if they wore different clothes you would take them for 20+ easily.
I have also seen such girls in adult night clubs where admission is for people over 21 only.

Lord help the boys/guys that eventually get caught in such activity.
They will be charged with rape and be vilified in the courts for having sex with a girl so young.
Yet if they didn't know they were school-girls and weren't told their age, how would they know??


That's my definition of "Jailbait".

(in reply to FrostedFlake)
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RE: cyberbullying, victimhood and sports.. again! - 3/23/2013 9:08:23 AM   
Missokyst


Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
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jail•bait (ˈdʒeɪlˌbeɪt)

n. Slang.
a girl with whom sexual intercourse is punishable as statutory rape because she is under the legal age of consent.
[1930–35, Amer.]

I find this a bit disheartening because at the age I was when it occured, I felt like a kid. I played with barbie, I created games, I ran a childrens theater. I was a kid in all things but body I guess. Boys and men still tried to pay attention. It was uncomfortable. That meant that because of biology, I was fair game. The age of consent.. I have no idea what that was.

quote:

ORIGINAL: FrostedFlake

Jailbait.

I wonder what that word means.



_____________________________

pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding ~Gibran, Kahlil

“The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.”
― Bob Marley


(in reply to FrostedFlake)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: cyberbullying, victimhood and sports.. again! - 3/23/2013 9:21:52 AM   
Missokyst


Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline
I would strongly disagree with you on one point. I was not overly promiscuous. When it happened I was a kid. What happened next was I was lost. None of it had to do with sex.

Now, as to the sexualization of younger and younger females over the decades, that I do agree with. I have witnessed it and reported it when it is out in the public. Have you?

See I think those things should be reported. I think people need to be held accountable for their actions AND be made aware of those consequences when they are of the age it may likely occur. When my sons were growing up I let them know if they started dating and then found out their girlfriend was pregnant I expected them to pay for part of that childs welfare. It was their duty, not the state, it was their choice and would be their responsibility. When my daughters were growing up they had a similar lecture, along with the cautionary advice that they could not count on other parents taking a similar stand so they may be on their own. As a result my offspring were particularly careful. No one had a child before they were ready for one. No one held the belief that sex was love.

Now, we have sex tapes. Uploads to twitter, youtube ect that people MAY view as the way to popularity.

Lord help the boys/guys that get caught in that mentality? In my view if you are going to play, you DAMN well better be aware of the rules.


quote:

ORIGINAL: freedomdwarf1


quote:

ORIGINAL: FrostedFlake

Jailbait.

I wonder what that word means.


From Merriam Webster - a girl under the age of consent with whom sexual intercourse is unlawful and constitutes statutory rape.

From my personal experience, I would re-define it as "A girl who is overtly promiscuous under the age of consent with whom sexual intercourse is unlawful and constitutes statutory rape but frequently mimics adult behaviour in order to contravene the law for her own sexual gratification".

My kids know several girls at the local school who are only 11-12 that have sex regularly "because they can".
I have seen some of them coming out of the school gates and if they wore different clothes you would take them for 20+ easily.
I have also seen such girls in adult night clubs where admission is for people over 21 only.

Lord help the boys/guys that eventually get caught in such activity.
They will be charged with rape and be vilified in the courts for having sex with a girl so young.
Yet if they didn't know they were school-girls and weren't told their age, how would they know??


That's my definition of "Jailbait".




_____________________________

pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding ~Gibran, Kahlil

“The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.”
― Bob Marley


(in reply to freedomdwarf1)
Profile   Post #: 7
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