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Dombutsane -> RE: Being Too Submissive? (5/6/2013 3:33:32 PM)
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As you were primarily seeking a subs point of view, I may be answering out of turn as a Dom, but I think the most important thing is to be who you are. If you are an ultra submissive woman, then be that, project that. It's the best way to attract those who are interested in who and what you are. That being said, I agree with "theshytype" that a little effort into doing something subtle enough that it's consistent with your personality but overt enough to be noticed and read, goes a very long way to preventing you from being overlooked. Maybe a bit of effort into placing yourself in surroundings that foster easier and more casual interaction would help as well. Say, a quaint dim pub vs a dark loud nightclub. Attire helps as well. If a woman is quiet and sitting in a corner, yet clearly dressed to attract eyes, there shouldn't be much confusion.
Will aggressive women get paired up sooner in a given situation than the quieter submissive women like yourself? Yes, probably, because finding the submissive "wallflower" through the crowd may take a bit more time. But remember that those men paired with the aggressive women early on are probably either men who prefer aggressive women or are sub to them and so you haven't really missed out on anyone who's right for you, have you? I think it's two sided. Given your nature, the right men for you will need to put in a bit more effort to find you and you won't want someone who isn't willing to. But ask a trusted friend how you project in these situations, because we often appear differently to others than we think. Make a bit of effort to be certain you have approachable, receptive body language and try to give a shy signal when one of the right men finds you, so they know not to pass by. Don't change who you are, just tweak how you show who you are. And be patient.
Good luck
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