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difference? - 5/22/2013 4:20:30 PM

petforOwner26

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What are the differences between Tops, Sirs Daddies and Masters?
Also the differences between bottoms subs and slaves?

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RE: difference? - 5/22/2013 4:24:19 PM

OsideGirl

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Between Sirs, Dom and Masters....it's what ever floats your boat.

Topping refers to engaging in the dominant position for set amount of time. ie: someone who wields the flogger in a negotiated scene/ playtime.

Same thing from the other side: Between subs and slaves, it's whatever works for your relationship.

Bottoming refers to engaging in the submissive role for a set amount of time. ie: the masochist in BDSM scene/playtime.

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RE: difference? - 5/22/2013 9:51:40 PM

graceadieu

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Agreed, though bottoming and topping don't have to involve dominance and submission. It can just be person causing the sensation (flogging, tying the ropes, whatever) and the person receiving it.

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RE: difference? - 5/22/2013 9:59:43 PM

androticus

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Top refers to preferring to be sexually dominant, and with gay guys it also implies a guy who likes to fuck another guy.
Bottom is the opposite, preferring to be sexually submissive, and again, has connotations of wanting to get fucked.

Those can refer to roles in single sessions, or to overall orientations. For some people these are contextual, and depend on the other person -- someone can be predominantly a top, but sometimes like to bottom with some people. A person who really likes both is called "versatile" (in the gay community) or (more common in the straight community) "switch".

Dom/Sub get more into the broader realm of domination and submission. For example, a lot of gay guys talk in "Top/Bottom" language but they aren't really referring to a wider array of things like bondage, S&M, etc.

At least in my experience of what people mean, Dom/Sub tends to be more narrowly related to sexual enjoyment. For example, I had a roommate who was a Dom and he had several Sub female partners, and they would engage in BDSM sex, but outside that, they just had a very "vanilla" type of relationship with each other.

Master/Slave is the more overarching kind of relationship of dominance and submissive, that typically extends far beyond just sexual sessions, into everyday activities and life, involving a much more pervasive degree of control, orders, restrictions, and so on.

"Daddy" is a fetish term for there being a paternalistic type of component to the relation, wherein the sub would refer to the Daddy as if that person were a parent, and might involve parental-style discipline, etc.

"Sir" is more of a term of reference for a Dom or a Master, ex. "My Sir let me do X last night!" So a Sir could refer to a Dom or Master.

Hope this helped, and of course these are broad terms with many contexts of use and varying interpretations, so my defs have to be taken with a grain of salt...

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RE: difference? - 5/23/2013 10:40:55 AM

NiceButMeanGirl

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So then, Top and bottom would be more like play partners than actually Dom/me & sub power exchange? I'm on that "F" site as well as on here and they offer all these options for what to call your relationship & I'm trying to figure out exactly which it is....

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RE: difference? - 5/24/2013 11:34:23 PM

graceadieu

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quote:

ORIGINAL: NiceButMeanGirl

So then, Top and bottom would be more like play partners than actually Dom/me & sub power exchange? I'm on that "F" site as well as on here and they offer all these options for what to call your relationship & I'm trying to figure out exactly which it is....

NBMG

Top and bottom could be play partners, or it could be a relationship (even marriage) where the couple does kinky stuff in the bedroom. But probably not an ongoing power exchange, just negotiated BDSM scenes.

D/s can also be play partners or a couple that does BDSM and power exchange play in the bedroom, or it can involve an ongoing power exchange outside the bedroom.

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RE: difference? - 5/25/2013 5:58:27 AM

chatterbox24

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My thoughts.

Tops- calling the shots for the moment, or temporarily in a sexual scene. They may be the bottom next time.
Sirs- that is just a sign of respect to any of the others mentioned. Tops< daddies<masters,doms.
Masters- total control in and out of the bedroom. mentally, physically, even emotionally. Always dominant, they never switch.
Daddies- a very loving compassionate dom who rewards their sub as a child, and may discipline them like one too.
Doms- can be constant, or they may chose to switch too, may or may not control all aspects of your life.

< Message edited by chatterbox24 -- 5/25/2013 5:59:43 AM >

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RE: difference? - 5/25/2013 7:13:32 AM

littlewonder

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For me and me alone; you decide what's right for you:

sub: consents each and every time to every action. Uses a safeword. Usually their partner is a dom/me

slave: consents once and one only. Does not use a safeword. Usually their partner is a Master/Mistress

bottom: is the receiver of play for sensation purposes and not for power purposes. Partner usually called a Top.

switch: usually is both a top/bottom or sub/dom/me. The two switch depending on their moods.

masochist: Gets off on receiving pain.

sadist: Gets off on giving pain. Some enjoy playing with a masochist who enjoys the pain. Others enjoy playing with someone who submits to the pain but does not necessarily enjoys the pain but they enjoy pleasing the sadist usually because he's also a MasterMistress or Dom/me.

babygirl/boy: enjoys ageplay with a Daddy/Mommy or enjoys being taken care of like a child by a daddy/mommy.

princess: enjoys being pampered

brat: enjoys playing games so they can be "punished" aka funishment

funishment: roleplaying and pretending one is being punished but it's all for fun and not for discipline purposes.

hhmm...I think I've covered the big ones everyone usually asks here.

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