Having trouble having an orgasm... (Full Version)

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doorinneverwhere -> Having trouble having an orgasm... (8/3/2013 10:44:37 AM)

Hope this is an okay place to ask a general-ish sex question...

So I've always masturbated with my hood covering my clitoris. I just has always felt better to me that way. I can orgasm easily, have no problems.

I've told the person I'm having sex with this but part of he still will pull my hood back and stimulate me that way. He thinks I need regular play like that to make me less sensitive. And its just...uncomfortable. It kind of burns and aches and leaves me frustrated because I just cannot seem to have an orgasm that way.

Think theres anything to his plan to decrease sensitivity?




AthenaSurrenders -> RE: Having trouble having an orgasm... (8/3/2013 11:12:00 AM)

It may decrease sensitivity over time - I don't know for certain either way. But personally, if someone kept insisting on doing things I found unpleasant and frustrating every time we had sex, despite me clearly telling him what I needed to get satisfaction.... well, let's just say he wouldn't be around long enough to find out whether my sensitivity changed or not.

What's most likely to happen is you will find it harder and harder to cum every time you are with him because of the pressure and frustration - it will become a self-fulfilling prophecy because he's setting you up to feel stress over it.

Why does it need to be less sensitive? You can orgasm, you can enjoy sex, why does it matter?

Unless your fetish is tease and denial or you're getting some other kind of fun from this play, I'd tell him to knock it off. I know, I know, you're a sub, right? So it's up to the dom when and if you get to cum. But someone who won't/can't take on board what does and doesn't feel good for you is likely to be an inconsiderate partner across the board, and if one partner is having a crappy time during sex, it's likely your passion will fizzle pretty fast.




freedomdwarf1 -> RE: Having trouble having an orgasm... (8/3/2013 11:16:31 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: AthenaSurrenders

It may decrease sensitivity over time - I don't know for certain either way. But personally, if someone kept insisting on doing things I found unpleasant and frustrating every time we had sex, despite me clearly telling him what I needed to get satisfaction.... well, let's just say he wouldn't be around long enough to find out whether my sensitivity changed or not.

What's most likely to happen is you will find it harder and harder to cum every time you are with him because of the pressure and frustration - it will become a self-fulfilling prophecy because he's setting you up to feel stress over it.

Why does it need to be less sensitive? You can orgasm, you can enjoy sex, why does it matter?

Unless your fetish is tease and denial or you're getting some other kind of fun from this play, I'd tell him to knock it off. I know, I know, you're a sub, right? So it's up to the dom when and if you get to cum. But someone who won't/can't take on board what does and doesn't feel good for you is likely to be an inconsiderate partner across the board, and if one partner is having a crappy time during sex, it's likely your passion will fizzle pretty fast.

^^^ THIS ^^^

[sm=goodpost.gif]




theshytype -> RE: Having trouble having an orgasm... (8/3/2013 12:48:25 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: AthenaSurrenders

It may decrease sensitivity over time - I don't know for certain either way. But personally, if someone kept insisting on doing things I found unpleasant and frustrating every time we had sex, despite me clearly telling him what I needed to get satisfaction.... well, let's just say he wouldn't be around long enough to find out whether my sensitivity changed or not.

What's most likely to happen is you will find it harder and harder to cum every time you are with him because of the pressure and frustration - it will become a self-fulfilling prophecy because he's setting you up to feel stress over it.

Why does it need to be less sensitive? You can orgasm, you can enjoy sex, why does it matter?

Unless your fetish is tease and denial or you're getting some other kind of fun from this play, I'd tell him to knock it off. I know, I know, you're a sub, right? So it's up to the dom when and if you get to cum. But someone who won't/can't take on board what does and doesn't feel good for you is likely to be an inconsiderate partner across the board, and if one partner is having a crappy time during sex, it's likely your passion will fizzle pretty fast.


A thousand times this ^^^





DesFIP -> RE: Having trouble having an orgasm... (8/3/2013 1:06:36 PM)

Ask him if what he wants is to convince you that the worst possible thing you can do is have sex with him? Because that's where you're headed. If he wants this, he should continue until you tell him you don't want to see him again.

If he wants you to enjoy sex with him, he needs to throw away all those preconceived ideas he's gotten from porn and start listening to you instead.




Miyani -> RE: Having trouble having an orgasm... (8/3/2013 1:48:09 PM)

You're not having trouble having an orgasm. You can orgasm just fine, when there's actual fun things happening. He's having trouble getting you off. Because he's choosing to do things you've specifically said you don't like, in order to... make you less sensitive? Why the actual fuck would he want his girl LESS sensitive? Sensitivity is FUN.




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