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LadyPact -> RE: Emotions (9/1/2013 11:36:17 AM)
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My standard answer. I do this for fun.
Not every engagement in BDSM has to be some deep, extraordinary "come to Jesus" moment. I don't always have to be playing on fear, emotional pain, or anger to be having a good time. To use the roller coaster example, sure, there are people getting in that car who are absolutely terrified, looking to try riding that ride to conquer that fear as a personal accomplishment.
There are other people in those cars, too. Some for the thrill. Some for the rush. Some who wanted to have a good time because they enjoy the wind in their hair while they raise their arms up and enjoy the physical experience of the twists and turns. Their fun on the ride isn't any less just because they aren't trying to obtain some personal goal and it doesn't have to be more meaningful because their emotions about the experience aren't trying to reach a platitude of being deeper or darker in some way. Whether one person is just having a good time while another is conquering their demons, like it or not, it's still the same ride and the only difference is personal perception. The attendant loading folks into their seats doesn't prioritize people into those cars before you race along the track according to how people want to attach various meanings to it.
Just like the roller coaster, of course there are things that are out of bounds. Personally, I don't do anger when I play. Not from Myself and not from the person that I'm dealing with unless we have made an arrangement beforehand. For the most part, at least 95% of the time, I'm not doing this stuff for somebody's pseudo therapy and I'm not qualified to screw around with things like that. If a person that I'm not connected with is going to get pissed off because I'm beating them, they most likely need to find another top. One who wants to accept the additional concerns about their own safety because the bottom is volatile and may react in an unfavorable or dangerous way. I most certainly wouldn't accept that situation from a meet and beat encounter and there is a high probability that I'm not doing it during casual play. As the old joke goes, the ropes will be untied sooner or later and I'm not willing to deal with somebody who has the potential to lash out when the scene is over.
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