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WebWanderer -> On the nature of FetLife (or when boredom strikes) (10/25/2013 7:07:55 PM)
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From the field notes of WebWanderer, an explorer of the intertubes:
During his travels through the series of tubes commonly referred to as Internet ((C) Senator Ted Stevens, 2006), this researcher discovered a most unusual community known as FetLife. In many ways, it appears to resemble the infamous Book of Faces (see previous entry), yet there are some peculiar anomalies that set it apart:
There is a puzzling overabundance of breadcrumbs. The natives appear to throw them around to indicate excitement, arousal and other such urges. One can’t help but wonder what economic or gastronomical calamity created such strange custom.
A significant percentage of the natives list Antarctica as their primary residence. This researcher’s main hypothesis is that it’s all part of a long-term plan to establish a settlement of like-minded individuals (see Utah; Lesbos, island of).
Age categories of the natives do not follow a typical bell curve due to an improbably high number of 99-year-olds, many of whom claim to reside in Antarctica. This researcher has yet to find a single native over 99 years of age and requests more funding to investigate this most fascinating phenomenon.
According to the local mythos, the community was founded by one John Baku. The amount of stories and adoration bestowed on John Baku leads this researcher to believe that he might be a mythological creature, an anthropomorphic representation of everything that has anything to do with kink. More research is required.
The natives put high emphasis on art – primarily photographs, video recordings and short stories. The best works of art are usually assembled at the local cultural center known as “Kinky and Popular.” Oddly enough, quite a few of those masterpieces are the latter but not the former. Therefore this researcher requests more funding and a deadline extension to study this Kinky&Popular section in greater detail. For science. Ahem. Yes, definitely for science.
One of the most unusual phenomena occurs when one of the natives speaks out against the rants and drama that appear to plague this community. Oddly enough, many such outbursts also tend to be dramatic rants and are rewarded (and, some might say, encouraged) by breadcrumbs from the onlookers.
One of the most popular pastimes of this fascinating community is the ongoing debate concerning exact definitions of concepts like Master, slave, submission, lifestyle, etc. These highly heated discussions are characterized by mountains of breadcrumbs (this researcher has yet to discover who cleans them up – could it be the French maids?), finger-pointing, name-calling and people being terribly offended by complete strangers whom they will most likely never meet in real life.
These are but preliminary findings and more research is required to paint a more accurate picture of this fascinating community. Further assistance from experts in the field is highly appreciated. You may leave comments with your analysis at your convenience.
Diligently exploring Kinky&Popular (for science!),
WebWanderer
Esq, PhD, MD, FTW, LOL
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