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AthenaSurrenders -> RE: how can I be the best sub/slave I can be (12/23/2013 7:51:37 AM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: ballionsnow
How can I be the best sub/slave I can be?
Start by being the best PERSON you can be.
Work on your communication skills - they are essential to any strong relationship. You should be able to express your feelings and worries calmly without making accusations, listen to what your partner has to say (even if you don't like it) and look for a compromise.
Be responsible. You're 18, so even if you are super mature, you are new to being an adult. Get some practice at holding down a job (and/or finish college), paying your bills on time, keeping your home tidy etc.
Be fascinating. Try lots of different things and cultivate some hobbies. Almost any hobbies will do - try to have some variety. Eat foreign foods, travel if you can afford it, read voraciously, play sports, join clubs, create things, and learn practical skills.
Find someone who suits you and take your time before submitting. This was my mistake. I found an awesome guy but tried to jump right in to 24/7 slavery when in reality I wasn't ready - I needed to grow up more and mature and start more slowly. Date lots of people. Don't submit to someone who proves they can't be trusted - if you know them to lie, cheat, or generally live a life of chaos, you probably shouldn't trust them to run your life.
Think with your brain, not your penis. Your penis is not always your friend.
Reflect on things that go wrong - see them as an opportunity for growth. Try to set things right and be responsible for your own mistakes. Be sure to make some mistakes.
Be honest about what you want and need, both with the dominant and with yourself. Don't get stuck in a relationship which doesn't suit you because you think submission must look a certain way. If it's making you both happy, you're doing it right. If not, you're doing it wrong - regardless of what other people do in their relationships.
Remember real life isn't porn, and submission isn't always fun and sexy. Sometimes it's boring or inconvenient. Remember that submission means yielding to the will of another, even when you don't want to. Be sure to choose someone who won't ask you to submit to things that could harm you or will have a negative impact on your life. Walk away if someone treats you like shit. Everyone has that right, be they dom, sub, slave or whatever.
And then, yes, obey.
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