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5 Truths About Sexual Fetishes (A Dominatrix's Perspective)


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5 Truths About Sexual Fetishes (A Dominatrix's Perspect... - 3/11/2014 10:54:26 PM   
pinniped


Posts: 41
Joined: 9/14/2010
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quote:

The stereotype goes that when it comes to sex, men are as simple-minded as dogs. ("Come on, we all know guys are only after one thing!") Well, as someone with a few years' experience as a dominatrix and phone sex operator, I'm here to tell you that could not possibly be more wrong. Male desire ranges from the merely kinky to the incredibly bizarre, and men are often so tortured by it that they're not comfortable talking to anyone about it -- not their closest friends, and certainly not their wives.

But they are comfortable talking to me, and here's what I've found over the years ...


http://www.cracked.com/article_20963_5-truths-about-sexual-fetishes-a-dominatrixs-perspective.html

Bearing in mind that CRACKED is primarily a humor site, and thus prone to a fair amount of hyperbole and a bit of snark, I still find many of their articles to be interesting and insightful (though sometimes in need of fact-checking). This one....less so than many. Much of it does ring true, given both the odd fetishes I have occasionally run across online and some that I harbor myself, but it didn't present much new in terms of conclusions or direction. Still, I would be curious to see what experiences mentioned some of our folks can relate to, particularly among other professionals. (Or anywhere they feel the author is off-base.)
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RE: 5 Truths About Sexual Fetishes (A Dominatrix's Pers... - 3/11/2014 11:14:42 PM   
FieryOpal


Posts: 2821
Joined: 12/8/2013
From: Maryland
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: pinniped

The stereotype goes that when it comes to sex, men are as simple-minded as dogs.
<snip>

You mean to say most of them aren't?

Hey, stop insulting our canine buddies.

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Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage. - Lao Tzu
There is no remedy for love but to love more. - Thoreau

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RE: 5 Truths About Sexual Fetishes (A Dominatrix's Pers... - 3/11/2014 11:16:53 PM   
pinniped


Posts: 41
Joined: 9/14/2010
Status: offline 		Well, if you want me to be a dog, I'm kinda into that. ;)

(One fetish the article doesn't actually mention...)

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RE: 5 Truths About Sexual Fetishes (A Dominatrix's Pers... - 3/11/2014 11:26:17 PM   
FieryOpal


Posts: 2821
Joined: 12/8/2013
From: Maryland
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: pinniped

Well, if you want me to be a dog, I'm kinda into that. ;)

(One fetish the article doesn't actually mention...)

While I appreciate the offer, I'm not looking for a full-time pet. Pet play on occasion can be fun, though....

_____________________________

Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage. - Lao Tzu
There is no remedy for love but to love more. - Thoreau

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RE: 5 Truths About Sexual Fetishes (A Dominatrix's Pers... - 4/12/2014 9:38:50 PM   
lalbobbilynn


Posts: 483
Joined: 6/11/2006
Status: offline 		Interesting article, thanx!

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RE: 5 Truths About Sexual Fetishes (A Dominatrix's Pers... - 4/20/2014 5:32:21 AM   
MercTech


Posts: 3706
Joined: 7/4/2006
Status: offline 		A website named for MAD Magazine's only competition may have finally grown up a bit. <grin>

http://langtath.blogspot.com/2012/10/cracked-magazine-305.html

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RE: 5 Truths About Sexual Fetishes (A Dominatrix's Pers... - 4/20/2014 5:35:51 PM   
Chwilfrydig


Posts: 156
Joined: 1/15/2014
Status: offline 		"Male desire ranges from the merely kinky to the incredibly bizarre, and men are often so tortured by it that they're not comfortable talking to anyone about it -- not their closest friends, and certainly not their wives."

Hi, pinniped,

I'm not a professional, but I have personal experience with what she is talking about.

I was in a six-year relationship with a man who, unknown to me, had a panty fetish. He never told me and was deeply ashamed when it came out. We split, not because of his fetish but because of the circumstances of how it came to light (long story). He has since immersed himself in a fundamentalist religion, and I'm pretty sure he is denying this fetish and treating it as a sin from which he has been saved.

Yes, "tortured" is an apt description. I find it incredibly sad that someone would feel so ashamed of their desires. My ex-partner was many years older than me. I wonder if younger men growing up with access to the world wide web of fetishes are more open and accepting of themselves. I hope so.

As a side note...it was researching his fetish in an attempt to understand him that lead me to the kink world. I was very naive then, but when I came across "dominant/submissive" I had one of those "aha" moments that helped explain my own desires.

Thank you for posting this.

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RE: 5 Truths About Sexual Fetishes (A Dominatrix's Pers... - 4/23/2014 2:57:11 PM   
BlackCuckoldX


Posts: 7
Joined: 4/23/2014
Status: offline 		Such is the world we live in.

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RE: 5 Truths About Sexual Fetishes (A Dominatrix's Pers... - 8/10/2014 5:28:54 AM   
missbrownjinx


Posts: 29
Joined: 6/11/2014
Status: offline 		I found the 75% homosexual thoughts hard to swallow. I bet the men did too (GIGGITY!).

Everything else on point.

My fav: "....the guy who likes me to be dressed as a Playboy bunny ... then magically turn him into a carrot, use the carrot as a dildo, and eat him (the grossest part is he wants me to dip him in ranch dressing to eat ... I hate ranch).

In the TV show, the one with the call girl, Belle (British, can't remember the name), she has a client who asks for 'smooshing.' I.e., he wanted them to get down and dirty with baked beans, cakes, any food that would 'smoosh.' He was disappointed that she wasn't really 'into it.' FFS.

People's fetishes can be incredibly specific and 'weird.' I know weird isn't the word to use, but goddammit man, a carrot? In my experience I have had things like this asked of me and done them without so much as a giggle. I will laugh to myself about it afterwards though. I always feel it is a privilege to be able to fulfill someone's fantasy in such a way. Can you imagine that guy mentioning the carrot fantasy to his wife? That's the reason item #1 resonates with me, I started doing pro-domination not for the money, but for the opportunity to help people live out their fantasies in a safe space. It's an incredible rush for me.

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RE: 5 Truths About Sexual Fetishes (A Dominatrix's Pers... - 11/23/2014 2:48:33 AM   
orgasmdenial12


Posts: 613
Joined: 9/18/2012
Status: offline 		What gets me is the false universalism and the justification of cheating - I see it all the time from Pro-Domme sources.

Firstly, they would only know about the men who don't tell their wives because that is their clientele. The men who have great open-minded relationships with their wives are happily at home, never bothering to pick up the phone to a Pro-Domme. In my opinion, this warps the perspective of Pro-Dommes.

Secondly, it's more of the same 'his wife doesn't understand him!' mentality that justifies the lying and cheating that they are enabling. Pro-Dommes often don't like to think that they are part of a system that manipulates, controls and deceives women about the honesty and sexuality of their partners, so they wrap it up in language that blames the wife (she doesn't understand him vs. my clients are compulsive liars) (he can't get his needs met vs. he is dishonest about his needs in order to manipulate others).

I don't dislike Pro-Dommes and I have nothing against what they do, but I do tire of reading the same old aggrandising justifications for enabling psychopaths and making a buck out of it.

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RE: 5 Truths About Sexual Fetishes (A Dominatrix's Pers... - 11/24/2014 4:39:10 AM   
MariaB


Posts: 2969
Joined: 4/3/2007
Status: offline 		Are you saying married men who visit pro Dommes are psychopaths?

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RE: 5 Truths About Sexual Fetishes (A Dominatrix's Pers... - 11/24/2014 5:16:50 AM   
MariaB


Posts: 2969
Joined: 4/3/2007
Status: offline
There are balloon fetishsts of two varieties. The first loves the real latex balloon; the smell and feel of the rubber. Its just another rubber fetish really. They often buy blow up body suits which they can climb inside and get off on both the inflation and the smell of rubber. The other is having saline dripped into the scrotum so it balloons in size. In my time on the scene I have come across inflatable outfits and those who love them. I've never met a submissive inflatable though I'm sure they are out their. In my time working as a pro Domme where I saw hundreds of clients and advertised that I did ballooning, I never once got an enquiry about "blowing up balloons" but got a good few men who wanted their scrotums ballooning. In my time as a phone dominant, I never once got a caller asking me to blow up a balloon either and again, I spoke to many hundreds of callers. When I was pro Domming I had a large circle of pro Domme friends, we even got together once a month for a girls night out. I've heard it all but I never once heard mention of anyone having to blow up and sit on a balloon but according to the woman in the link, she makes out this is a regular thing The thing is, because this is a rubber fetish and those with that fetish need to smell and feel the balloons, why would they call and pay a phone Domme to do it at the other end of a phone?

Its easy to look up fetishes and then claim you do them all with clients but because of what she said about the balloons, I think she made all of it up.

Another thing is, most clients never tell you they are married. They don't want to waste their time (because time is money) talking about anything other than their immediate needs. Those that do are more likely to tell you that they love their wife and couldn't bare to risk losing her by telling her about their kinky need.

< Message edited by MariaB -- 11/24/2014 5:38:46 AM >

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