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Conmen and women in the lifestyle - 11/21/2004 4:50:08 PM   
sweetpettjenny


Posts: 674
Joined: 11/7/2004
Status: offline 		How do we help others in the lifestyle from predators ? thieves and liars. I was recently conned out of money by My last Master. He apparently did this to others...its funny how people speak up once you say something , but yet allow it to happen to others. How do we "out" people such as this. I am a slave and trusted my owner to pay me back. Do we give up trusting? what is the answer? i feel like my heart has been smashed. Thankyou for all help regarding this..it may help the next...
jenny
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Conmen and women in the lifestyle - 11/21/2004 5:15:26 PM   
lilserenity


Posts: 41
Joined: 7/1/2004
Status: offline 		I am terribly sorry about this misfortune happening to you. I also know of a Dom who got 10,000 from a sub . So you are not the first..I would like to say post His name so Eveeryone will be on guard. I would because I hate when predators use people for material things..Doms or Not list their name. Tell the world chances are he will change his name so go to ALL areas and post in their messageboards of this person,if worse comes down list his real name this way he is stopped to a total stop..This is becoming a new trend among Doms and others.I only know of a Dom thus far and a few subs who has taken as well and left. But this has got to stop..This is why I believe in contracts. In the contracts what is listed is done or given or used..If anthing else if you get into a relationship make sure trust is used first. If not sure about the person wait...Grow more closer to that person if you have too.Discover more about that person. If you go after talking a week and trust this person fully then you are going to mess up because a subs trust is a very valuable gift and like gifts given when the relationship is stable and for sure....Don't worry this person will get caught and when he does He will definitely know it.. So be careful and safe hugs serenity

(in reply to sweetpettjenny)
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RE: Conmen and women in the lifestyle - 11/21/2004 8:21:09 PM   
BeachMystress


Posts: 2156
Joined: 4/3/2004
From: Naples Island- Long Beach CA - Southern California
Status: offline
I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. The money isn't the big deal really, it is the emotional scaring that someone you trusted would use you in such a way. That has taken away a bit of your ability to trust people. *hugs*

It is unfortunate but true that there are scam artists out there and subs are easy targets. You already have the natural desire to please. One of the best checks to have in place is a friend you talk with who cares enough about you to tell you when you're being foolish. Make it a practice to run things past her or him before you do it. A second opinion never hurts.

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*Do not threaten the weak. Intimidate the strong. ~ Stevenson*
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(in reply to sweetpettjenny)
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RE: Conmen and women in the lifestyle - 11/21/2004 11:55:08 PM   
Estring


Posts: 3314
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		You really can't protect people from this type of thing. The best thing you can do is be smarter next time. Don't ignore the red flags next time that you surely ignored this time. And don't loan money to anybody.

(in reply to sweetpettjenny)
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RE: Conmen and women in the lifestyle - 11/22/2004 11:02:07 AM   
sub4hire


Posts: 6775
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		I'm sorry for your loss. The mere fact you are talking about it here is a start at educating other's.
I have to disagree with Estring on this though. I feel you can educate other's. Go to chat rooms. Speak out. Just tell people handing money over to people you do not know is risky. Even if some tell you that you must.

Sadly it is true you cannot speak the offender's name. Reason being is simple. You could out an innocent person. Perhaps out is not the correct term. We have to face it there are a lot of people who are not mature yet, who would get mad and run around saying things that just are not true.
Talking on board's. Well it is my experience the really new people finding the lifestyle. They are not on this board. The truly smart ones are. However, sadly that is not the majority of the board. Yes, I'd say it is important here to talk about it as well.
I think if you could speak out in chat rooms it would be the most beneficial. Of course this could get very frustrating for you as well. Anymore, that's how most find the lifestyle. You'd sort of be going straight to the source.
Getting them to believe you is a whole other story. I don't have any advice on that.

(in reply to sweetpettjenny)
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RE: Conmen and women in the lifestyle - 11/22/2004 11:26:23 AM   
sweetpleaser


Posts: 689
Joined: 8/5/2004
From: Florida
Status: offline 		What a scumbag!! You with three children and he takes your money for his gain. It makes me so angry. You can educate others on what you went through and hopefully that will stop another woman from falling for this. From now on I would say no and have a deep conviction that the money is your children's. You might not let it go under those circumstances. If this man is local, you can pass the word around about him but it is hard to do that on the message boards as Gloria has said. I hope you feel better soon, best wishes!

_____________________________

~ann~

It's not the men in my life that count, it's the life in my men.--Mae West

(in reply to sweetpettjenny)
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RE: Conmen and women in the lifestyle - 11/22/2004 11:35:02 AM   
willing2serve


Posts: 385
Joined: 4/6/2004
Status: offline 		i am very naive and new in some respects to relationships and have been known not to see red flags, curiosity gets me into trouble, not "love blindness" but essentially a huge red flag for me is money issues. i do not want a sugar daddy, and i do not want to become a money slave....Aren't money issues a red flag for most people?

(in reply to sweetpleaser)
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RE: Conmen and women in the lifestyle - 11/22/2004 4:53:30 PM   
sweetpettjenny


Posts: 674
Joined: 11/7/2004
Status: offline 		well i have to say ...giving and loaning to one you love ..should not be a question...when they lie to get money ...thats another story

(in reply to willing2serve)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Conmen and women in the lifestyle - 11/22/2004 5:50:09 PM   
jillwfsub4blkdom


Posts: 375
Joined: 7/2/2004
Status: offline 		i am sorry to hear what happened to you and know very well how you feel. i know how persuasive Doms in those kind of situations can be. i wish you the best and i am sure you have learned a great deal from it.

jill

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"It's the moment that transcends
Our physical into a more spiritual level of understanding" - Musiq

(in reply to sweetpettjenny)
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RE: Conmen and women in the lifestyle - 11/22/2004 6:27:08 PM   
LordODiscipline


Posts: 995
Joined: 6/28/2004
Status: offline 		1. You do not help other people from the con-men and women
2. Please note: I mention both genders as there are as many men as there are women who are screwing with other people.
3. Press legal charges. - Stealing is stealing. There is no in between.

~J

< Message edited by LordODiscipline -- 11/22/2004 6:31:10 PM >

(in reply to sweetpettjenny)
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RE: Conmen and women in the lifestyle - 11/22/2004 10:29:00 PM   
cynnacent1


Posts: 340
Joined: 6/25/2004
From: Massachusetts
Status: offline 		Perhaps you could sue his dishonorable butt in small claims court? OR, i bet Judge Judy would REALLY enjoy spanking his ass REAL hard if you can prove your case well enough.

Other than that, i agree with EString. Think of it as a bit of an expensive learning experience, & don't tread blindly in the future. Always pay good heed to the red flags.

< Message edited by cynnacent1 -- 11/22/2004 10:33:47 PM >

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(in reply to sweetpettjenny)
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RE: Conmen and women in the lifestyle - 11/25/2004 2:31:29 PM   
Tristan


Posts: 330
Joined: 5/31/2004
Status: offline 		I agree with lilserenity - get a contract before you lend any money or preferably get some collateral, and watch for the red flags. Yeah, I'm sure if he were a good conman he would say that a contract or collateral is a sign you do not trust him, but its really just a way to make sure there are no misunderstandings later. I've seen too many people lend money to friends only to have the burden of repayment ruin their friendship. Owing money changes the dynamics of any relationship. If someone says you don't trust him or her because you want a contract or collateral, its usually a sign that person really can not be trusted.

(in reply to cynnacent1)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Conmen and women in the lifestyle - 11/25/2004 7:05:22 PM   
BlkTallFullfig


Posts: 5585
Joined: 6/25/2004
Status: offline 		Dear Jenny,
am very sorry to hear that you lost money; unfortunately the most important is the lost trust; I think it's always a shame when one is forced to become more cynical/less innocent because of evil encountered...
I cannot tell you never to lend money to a loved one, because sometimes people get into situations they need it, and people are honorable enough to pay back; what I can say, Is Never lend what you cannot afford to live without, and think twice before you do.
As for predators, they're everywhere, and not just in this lifestyle; you sort of have to take everything people say with a grain of salt, until their actions prove their words to be honest/congruent.
Good luck in the future, Ms M


< Message edited by BlkTallFullfig -- 11/25/2004 7:09:53 PM >

(in reply to sweetpettjenny)
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RE: Conmen and women in the lifestyle - 11/26/2004 11:56:35 PM   
Falcor64


Posts: 51
Joined: 11/24/2004
Status: offline 		For me, money issues would be a red flag. Especially sub to dom, though I've heard of such before. *sigh* "Sub" should not equal "cash cow", ya know?

(in reply to willing2serve)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Conmen and women in the lifestyle - 11/27/2004 10:22:55 AM   
Nvernilla


Posts: 303
Joined: 10/1/2004
Status: offline 		Well a list may be a good idea but I don't know how we could tell if it was the truth or just a slave mad at their last Dom. There are problems on both D/s sides of this I am sorry to hear of this though, and it is not the first time I've heard of things like this happening. A woman in Tx got taken for $900.00 when she had 3 kids she was raising alone. Someone who would this is a true slimewad. Came to find out when we checked this guy out he was 32 yrs old living with his mommy and probably ripping her off too, never got any of her money back though...Mike

(in reply to lilserenity)
Profile   Post #: 15
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