AthenaSurrenders
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Joined: 3/15/2012
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quote:
ORIGINAL: CuriousPalmySub
So I'm wondering, during pregnancy, what is considered "safe" B&D?
Clearly breast and belly play would be avoided as the pregnancy went on, but is there anything else that should specifically be avoided?
has anyone had a pregnant submissive and can share their thoughts/experiences
I am not a doctor, etc. I am a pregnant woman in a kinky relationship. Please take what I say as personal experience and general thoughts, not specific advice. The others are right, you really should raise these concerns with your doctor, though obviously speaking to your doctor is more important if you're into suspension and breath play than if you're into tickling and very light spanking.
When you're pregnant, it's not just your boobs and belly that are affected. It's a whole body thing. Your ligaments relax, so you're more prone to exercise related injuries. That means it's really important to be cautious of bondage positions, not to overstretch any joints. Your blood pressure will change, which can also affect positions you can safely hold and it's probably a good idea to reduce the amount of time you spend in any sort of restraints. You will be more prone to urine infections, meaning you might need to factor in extra bathroom trips in long play sessions and be scrupulous about cleaning up after sex. If pregnancy for you means vomiting, you obviously need to be super careful that you're not at risk of choking (like being tied where you can't lean forward to puke or wearing a gag that takes more than a second or two to unfasten).
Insertable sex toys should be safe, assuming your doctor has given the OK for sex in general in your case. Obviously you need to stick to the usual hygiene and safety rules - no sharing toys, no anus-to-vagina transfers, only using toys designed for insertion and being thorough with cleaning both before and after play. Not a good time to be adding new sexual partners since lots of STDs can affect the baby. No food near the vagina, if you're into that sort of stuff, because pregnant women are prone to thrush. For that matter, I'd think twice about wearing any sort of non-breathable fabric over your bits (like leather or PVC) for the same reason.
In later pregnancy, you're discouraged from lying flat on your back for extended periods. On the plus side, crawling is great for getting baby into a good birthing position. You already know not to do impact play or compress the belly or boobs (ow, blocked milk ducts) and you should be prepared for milk leaks towards the end. If you are going to do impact play on the other parts of the body, be careful to choose implements that might wrap around or miss, and expect that your pain tolerance and the amount of bruising you get will be different that when you're not pregnant.
What else? Oh, be prepared that everything will feel different. Your sex drive might go up or down, it might be harder or easier to orgasm, you might have more or less lubrication - you both need to accept that and take nothing for granted.
So basically you need to be careful about everything you do. You can probably still do a lot of play, but you both need to be aware that you need to start light and figure out your body's limits because they will be different. You might need to cut some sessions short and it's really important that you are both aware and willing to do that - neither of you can be pushy or brave about things if they don't feel right. Things will change regardless of how you feel about it so you must let go of any notion of how things are supposed to be. This is good practice for when the baby comes and you have to make massive adjustments to your relationship.
Good luck.
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safe play while pregnant - 
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