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physical abuse of a slave - 11/23/2004 7:35:14 PM

Posts: 57
Joined: 10/17/2004
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if any sub could give me insight, i would appriciate this.

i've meet bottoms who says they are submissive, yet they love it when i abuse them physically to show that i can be and will be very dominate towards them. sometimes i see that some of them want me to go to the point where it's not me being their master, but me being a physical abuser. i don't get off nor am i confortable with harming someone with my fist for pleasure. i've been with slaves who i had to work and mold them into the good slaves they were, but a few i've meet aren't like those in that vein. i'm curious, were you or are you a rebel slave? if so, is any of the things i've said about physical beatings common for you(to be anally clear, i mean physically hitting, not slapping, or whipping, but punching)

much thanks

_____________________________

"It may seem frivolous to suggest everybody just needs a good night out... but really we are living in such troubled times that losing yourself on the dancefloor is a nice way to escape and remind yourself that life is for living"

Nick Warren

RE: physical abuse of a slave - 11/23/2004 7:56:26 PM

Posts: 6775
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

They certainly are not for me. I'm only one person though.
Hopefully other's answer your question and give you a bit more insight.

(in reply to yellovv)

RE: physical abuse of a slave - 11/23/2004 10:30:34 PM

Posts: 168
Status: offline

quote:

i see that some of them want me to go to the point where it's not me being their master, but me being a physical abuser. i don't get off nor am i confortable with harming someone with my fist for pleasure.

I'm not sure what kind of punching you're talking about but if you're talking about women who want to be punched in the face, I'd agree that it's pretty extreme. I'd also say that if a sub is trying to get you to do something you don't want to do they're basically invalidating the whole D/s dynamic.

I don't think someone being extreme is necessarily rebellious although I can see how that could be the case. As far as any of the things you mentioned being common for me, no, they're not. I do like face stuff and did try a little soft punching several years ago but have always prefered being slapped. Slapping is part of our play when Master makes it part of our play.

This is my experience and how things work for us. Hope the information is of help to you.

Yours truly,
Ophelia

< Message edited by realophelia -- 11/23/2004 10:58:34 PM >

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(in reply to yellovv)

RE: physical abuse of a slave - 11/23/2004 11:34:13 PM

Posts: 943
Joined: 9/25/2004
From: Calgary, Alberta
Status: offline

[/quote]i've meet bottoms who says they are submissive, yet they love it when i abuse them physically to show that i can be and will be very dominate towards them. sometimes i see that some of them want me to go to the point where it's not me being their master, but me being a physical abuser. i don't get off nor am i confortable with harming someone with my fist for pleasure. i've been with slaves who i had to work and mold them into the good slaves they were, but a few i've meet aren't like those in that vein. i'm curious, were you or are you a rebel slave? if so, is any of the things i've said about physical beatings common for you(to be anally clear, i mean physically hitting, not slapping, or whipping, but punching)[/quote]

this slave comes from a long line of abuse so does not get off on being punched or heavy face slapping. Master knows of her abuse and has assured her that He will never do anything to hurt her in that aspect.

anyone who gets off on being punched, should seek some form of counselling as being punched is not a form of bdsm that this slave has heard of in all the time she has been a slave. "JMO"

this slave was a rebellious slave when she met Master SirTigerman, but the punishments were not punching, instead He would remove privileges such as the computer, contacting Him via phone, email or messenger, early curfews things like that.

a "TRUE" Dom/Domme does NOT need to use His/Her fists to prove They are Dominant, all it takes is brain power, and exerting the power that They have over the submissive/slave in question. the "s/siq" needs to seek help of some sort if they are looking to be punched as it may mean that they come from some sort of abusive past be it family abuse or spousal abuse. again "JMO."

this slave hopes she has not offended any O/one by her post and if she has she apologizes.

Attachment (1)

_____________________________

The Path To Being A Good slave Takes Hard Work, A Willingness To Learn, Ability To Take Criticism and the Ability To Take Punishments Well. i Am Still Learning So Please Be Patient With me, As i Walk the Path to Being A good slave. SLRN: 742 958 000

(in reply to realophelia)

RE: physical abuse of a slave - 11/23/2004 11:36:04 PM

Posts: 6142
Joined: 1/31/2004
From: Washington
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quote:

sometimes i see that some of them want me to go to the point where it's not me being their master, but me being a physical abuser. i don't get off nor am i confortable with harming someone with my fist for pleasure.

You're the Dom, so why do anything you aren't comfortable with? If a sub wants more than you want to give then she needs a different Dom or needs to do without. IMHO.

_____________________________

proudsub

"Without goals you become what you were. With goals you become what you wish." .

"You are entitled to your own opinions but not your own facts"--Alan Greenspan

(in reply to yellovv)

RE: physical abuse of a slave - 11/24/2004 12:26:19 AM

Posts: 2156
Joined: 4/3/2004
From: Naples Island- Long Beach CA - Southern California
Status: offline

This is a hard one to judge. Some people have a different pain threshold than others. Some are harder players than others. From reading your profile, I can see you might attract someone who is looking for harsh pain. While you are fairly young, you sound like someone who has a good head on his shoulders and could be trusted to take them to their edge. A lot of people have a problem going very far with pain. It is a scary area.. what is the line? Which is BDSM.. which is abuse. Have a look at this article. Maybe it can make you a little easier in your mind with where the line is.

BDSM or Abuse

_____________________________

Beach Mystress
*Do not threaten the weak. Intimidate the strong. ~ Stevenson*
http://beachmystress.jigsy.com
http://www.flickr.com/photos/beachmystress/

(in reply to yellovv)

RE: physical abuse of a slave - 11/24/2004 12:38:05 AM

Posts: 2156
Joined: 4/3/2004
From: Naples Island- Long Beach CA - Southern California
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: cariad

this slave hopes she has not offended any O/one by her post and if she has she apologizes.

Cariad,
How do I say this.. you have the RIGHT to offend all of us. There is no need to apologize. The only thing you need to do is make sure you do not dishonor your Dom, and from the tone of your post, there isn't a chance of that. You stated your opinions politely. If any of us didn't like it, we can go pound salt. You have the right to disagree, state opinions and debate all you want. *smiles*

_____________________________

Beach Mystress
*Do not threaten the weak. Intimidate the strong. ~ Stevenson*
http://beachmystress.jigsy.com
http://www.flickr.com/photos/beachmystress/

(in reply to cariad)

RE: physical abuse of a slave - 11/24/2004 2:34:17 AM

Gem

Posts: 100
Joined: 2/11/2004
Status: offline

Brightest Blessings

<<<<anyone who gets off on being punched, should seek some form of counselling as being punched is not a form of bdsm that this slave has heard of in all the time she has been a slave. "JMO">>>>

I am a person who is very much into punching and heavy face slapping scenes, also anger and resitance scenes. There are plenty of us out there as well :), and for the most part we are fairly sane, LOL we just get off on a different edge than other people.

However I have been with my Owner for 5 and a half years, when our scenes go to the heavier stuff it is not because he has to prove his "dominance" to me...it is because he has decided that is the wonderful scene we will play that time.

I would be very leary of anybody who approached me to prove my dominance by me punching and slapping them. To easy in this day and age for a abuse charge to be brought and stuck. It takes time to establish the trust needed to do heavy scenes like punching ect. And while you do say you are sadistic, that is not your cup of tea and that is ok. The great thing about being the one in charge is you do not have to do what you do not want to.

One persons abuse is another's orgasmic trip tot he dark side.

Okay back to lurking :)

Blessed Be
Gem

(in reply to cariad)

RE: physical abuse of a slave - 11/24/2004 4:03:24 AM

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Joined: 6/18/2004
Status: offline

quote:

sometimes i see that some of them want me to go to the point where it's not me being their master, but me being a physical abuser.

I happen to be very much into Body Percussion in this form. I don't see this as an abuse thing but a more along the lines of a very controlled scene. (for me that is)
I have to know that Thorns is in control in this particular event....i was raised by Three big bad ass Marine Brothers who enjoyed nothing more than turning me into a tomboy for them to train.....and they did.......extremely well. I have been the only female Bouncer in a club that i used to work at when i lived up North....i have had Men surrounding me all of my life that i physically fought with...and when i finally learned about Body Percussion and the emotions that come from that....it's a very controlled scene. This type of play is not for everyone...it just happens to be for me. Thorns is Master at all times....yes, i suppose you could see this as abuse or Him being the 'Abuser'...i see it as our Power Exchange.

Happy Wednesday!

~smilezz~

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(in reply to yellovv)

RE: physical abuse of a slave - 11/24/2004 6:00:39 AM

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Joined: 8/5/2004
From: Florida
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I think there are plenty of subs and slaves out there who do not need that kind of extreme play to be happy. You stick to your guns and make that a hard limit. They can go elsewhere to be punched. JMO

_____________________________

~ann~

It's not the men in my life that count, it's the life in my men.--Mae West

(in reply to yellovv)

RE: physical abuse of a slave - 11/24/2004 7:06:11 AM

Posts: 483
Status: offline

I think whatever kink you are into is fine, we all have our own limits, (just don't get any on me), but the one thing that bothered me in these posts is the word abuse, which has no place in this or any other relationship.

If you feel that your Master is abusing you, your relationship has changed, he has no right to abuse you in any way.

My submissive is my most prized possesion, it is my responsibility to nurture and care for her.

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If I got smart with you.................
How would you know?

(in reply to sweetpleaser)

RE: physical abuse of a slave - 11/24/2004 10:33:21 AM

perverseangelic

Posts: 2625
Joined: 2/2/2004
From: Davis, Ca
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Gem
<<<<anyone who gets off on being punched, should seek some form of counselling as being punched is not a form of bdsm that this slave has heard of in all the time she has been a slave. "JMO">>>>

I am a person who is very much into punching and heavy face slapping scenes, also anger and resitance scenes. There are plenty of us out there as well :), and for the most part we are fairly sane, LOL we just get off on a different edge than other people...

when our scenes go to the heavier stuff it is not because he has to prove his "dominance" to me...it is because he has decided that is the wonderful scene we will play that time.

I would be very leary of anybody who approached me to prove my dominance by me punching and slapping them.

Thanks for de-lurking, do it more!!

You said what I was going to say. I very much enjoy percussive play. I don't think it means I need conceling. It just means I like something different. :)

Why does someone who likes to get punched need it more than someone who likes to get whipped with a singletail? IMHO, there's a much larger potential for harm in the 2nd case.

_____________________________

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(in reply to Gem)

RE: physical abuse of a slave - 11/24/2004 11:14:17 AM

Posts: 943
Joined: 9/25/2004
From: Calgary, Alberta
Status: offline

quote:

Cariad,
How do I say this.. you have the RIGHT to offend all of us. There is no need to apologize. The only thing you need to do is make sure you do not dishonor your Dom, and from the tone of your post, there isn't a chance of that. You stated your opinions politely. If any of us didn't like it, we can go pound salt. You have the right to disagree, state opinions and debate all you want. *smiles*

this slave thanks You Ma'am..........she tries her best to do right by Master and Your words have put a smile on her face.......again thank You

Attachment (1)

_____________________________

The Path To Being A Good slave Takes Hard Work, A Willingness To Learn, Ability To Take Criticism and the Ability To Take Punishments Well. i Am Still Learning So Please Be Patient With me, As i Walk the Path to Being A good slave. SLRN: 742 958 000

(in reply to perverseangelic)

RE: physical abuse of a slave - 11/24/2004 11:38:15 AM

Posts: 385
Joined: 4/6/2004
Status: offline

I am so glad this post was started....Sometimes being new in the lifestyle, you wonder "how can i really have certain desires".... The words from Gem and perverseangelic were inspiring. I won't add a lot of verbage to this thread, but i do know that it may appear as abuse in the act itself, just as a simple hogtie may seem abusive to a vanilla Sunday school teacher (smile), but the true fact remains if you experience it, you will truly know the answer, there are no grey areas, if there are questions in your mind, it probably is abuse. You and only you are the ultimate judge if it is abuse or erotic desires....

(in reply to cariad)

RE: physical abuse of a slave - 11/24/2004 9:39:12 PM

Posts: 180
Joined: 10/22/2004
Status: offline

JMO but whatever two consenting adults choose to do isn"t abuse so if both of you consent to the punching and slapping etc etc then thats just your kink - IMO its only abuse when you have a non consenting party involved - different kinks spin different peoples wheels - but if you arent comfortable doing what someone else asks of you whether "topping" or "bottoming" then dont do it.
I suppose too , in this day and age, if you do go to those extremes be really sure becuase like play rape if you dont totally trust your partner you could end up in a whole heap of trouble.

As for me I think I'm more a pleasure slut than a pain slut :-)

smiles
ruby

(in reply to willing2serve)

RE: physical abuse of a slave - 11/25/2004 3:27:44 PM

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Joined: 11/14/2004
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i am a sub not a slave but my Mistress can be a harsh punisher. She uses many types of punmishment including whippin, hitting blades e.t.c. as these are punishments not fetishes and i declare not "hard limits" they are most definatly not abuse. I have been slapped and backhanded which do hurt but are truly saddening. i feel humiliated at those types of contact. The one time i was punched it shattered me i don't understand one who would want that as an pleasureable experience. That seems more masochistic than a slave right? i do not derive pleasure from my punishments but learn from them and serve better and try not to make that mistake again. i have occasionally sought punishment merley for the attention but to seek the pain seems different to me. The only times i request a specific punishment is to lessen the pain im about to recieve why would i want to ask for more? maybe the slave has a pain fetish rather then a desire to serve? just some thoughts given with respect.

(in reply to rubytuesday)

RE: physical abuse of a slave - 11/26/2004 7:54:59 AM

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Joined: 6/25/2004
From: Massachusetts
Status: offline

i'll back what many here have already expressed: Regardless, if it has already been agreed to as being a consentual exchange, it does not equal, nor should it be classified as 'abuse'.

There are far too many facets, and kinks within BSDM to snub the nose or play judge and jury in regard to what others enjoy in a consentual exchange between themselves, as long as the exchange does not cause damage to any outside of the exchange. --Live, and let live.

"Your kink does not have to be my kink, my kink does not have to be your's. i won't judge your's, please refrain from judgement of mine." -- Should be a worldwide recognized vow of tolerance and acceptance regarding the kinks and opinions, choices etc ect between all fellow BDMS-ers. Only in a perfect world ... yeah, i know.

On a lighter note, i have only recently realized that in providing my Master with the examples of what my hard and soft limits were back in June when we first met ..... i DID list watching sports as a HARD LIMIT, but dang!! i FORGOT to include *NASCAR* !!! That is concidered a sport too, right?? i didn't concent to any stinking sports!!

Shall i scream abuse?

*j/k Master, for YOU i will suffer in silence and watch obediantly anyway ..

*

< Message edited by cynnacent1 -- 11/26/2004 8:01:29 AM >

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(in reply to yellovv)

RE: physical abuse of a slave - 11/26/2004 2:35:25 PM

Posts: 2156
Joined: 4/3/2004
From: Naples Island- Long Beach CA - Southern California
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Anubis

i am a sub not a slave but my Mistress can be a harsh punisher. She uses many types of punmishment including whippin, hitting blades e.t.c. as these are punishments not fetishes and i declare not "hard limits" they are most definatly not abuse. I have been slapped and backhanded which do hurt but are truly saddening. i feel humiliated at those types of contact. The one time i was punched it shattered me i don't understand one who would want that as an pleasureable experience. That seems more masochistic than a slave right? i do not derive pleasure from my punishments but learn from them and serve better and try not to make that mistake again. i have occasionally sought punishment merley for the attention but to seek the pain seems different to me. The only times i request a specific punishment is to lessen the pain im about to recieve why would i want to ask for more? maybe the slave has a pain fetish rather then a desire to serve? just some thoughts given with respect.

To some people, taking pain is seen as devotion. I often have a sub tell me they want to be sodomized or hurt so they can show how much I mean to them... how much they can endure for me. Since it isn't something they want in daily life, to them, it becomes about taking it because you want to give it. How is that not service? I admit, it isn't performing an action. But how many people will let you sit there and beat them for the sheer fun of it.; because the feel of their hand hitting your flesh turns them on? Would you? If your Domme turned to you one day and said she wanted to explore the pleasures to be found in the more physical realm of BDSM, would you follow joyously along? Would you take whatever she could dish out to please her in that way? You might, but from your post, you are a different type of sub than that. "Service" subs often are the gentler breed who don't do well with harsh corporal punishment. It doesn't bring them the endorphin rush quite the way it brings other subs. To them the thought of being beaten is something to be equated with you messing up and being "bad." No sub in my experience wants to be bad. When they need to be punished it is either a true mistake, a bid for attention or because they need to find where the boundaries are.. how far they can push things. To a sub who enjoys percussive play, punishment might equal giving someone a foot bath or a long back massage. It is all service hon, just different flavors.

_____________________________

Beach Mystress
*Do not threaten the weak. Intimidate the strong. ~ Stevenson*
http://beachmystress.jigsy.com
http://www.flickr.com/photos/beachmystress/

(in reply to Anubis)

RE: physical abuse of a slave - 11/27/2004 9:46:22 PM

Posts: 577
Joined: 3/25/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: yellovv

if any sub could give me insight, i would appriciate this.

i've meet bottoms who says they are submissive, yet they love it when i abuse them physically to show that i can be and will be very dominate towards them. sometimes i see that some of them want me to go to the point where it's not me being their master, but me being a physical abuser. i don't get off nor am i confortable with harming someone with my fist for pleasure. i've been with slaves who i had to work and mold them into the good slaves they were, but a few i've meet aren't like those in that vein. i'm curious, were you or are you a rebel slave? if so, is any of the things i've said about physical beatings common for you(to be anally clear, i mean physically hitting, not slapping, or whipping, but punching)

much thanks

Ok i'm confused here. Are these submissives asking You to use Your fist or are they not being compliant enough to You wishes and You feel that using Your fist is the way to show them that You are Dominant?
Since others haven't asked this question i may be totally off base, but i think it can be seen either way. i'd need clarification before i could answer this post

(in reply to yellovv)

RE: physical abuse of a slave - 11/30/2004 9:16:31 PM

Posts: 57
Joined: 10/17/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: liljoy

quote:

ORIGINAL: yellovv

if any sub could give me insight, i would appriciate this.

i've meet bottoms who says they are submissive, yet they love it when i abuse them physically to show that i can be and will be very dominate towards them. sometimes i see that some of them want me to go to the point where it's not me being their master, but me being a physical abuser. i don't get off nor am i confortable with harming someone with my fist for pleasure. i've been with slaves who i had to work and mold them into the good slaves they were, but a few i've meet aren't like those in that vein. i'm curious, were you or are you a rebel slave? if so, is any of the things i've said about physical beatings common for you(to be anally clear, i mean physically hitting, not slapping, or whipping, but punching)

much thanks

Ok i'm confused here. Are these submissives asking You to use Your fist or are they not being compliant enough to You wishes and You feel that using Your fist is the way to show them that You are Dominant?
Since others haven't asked this question i may be totally off base, but i think it can be seen either way. i'd need clarification before i could answer this post

fist...full fist...i've been begged to punish with a fist towards the face a few times and that's why i asked this question...should have been more clear about this...sorry, but it happens to me sometimes where i'm not too clear with what i'm describing

_____________________________

"It may seem frivolous to suggest everybody just needs a good night out... but really we are living in such troubled times that losing yourself on the dancefloor is a nice way to escape and remind yourself that life is for living"

Nick Warren

(in reply to liljoy)

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