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ORIGINAL: JuicerSales

Buy my juicers!!!!!!!!!!

Of course it's a real fetish just like selling juicers!

Buy my juicers!!!!!!!!!!

This isn't spam advertising because it's my really real fetish!!!!!!!!!!

Buy my juicers!!!!!!!!!!

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ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist

However, there is no such fetish, no paraphilia that defines money pigs, financial domination or a FinDom. So for me, I have to ask myself if it's a real life fetish? The answer I came up with was no.

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ORIGINAL: MariaB

Really interesting bit of psychology their RS

We do have a guy who turns up at Fem Domme clubs in London. He always brings along a bunch of envelopes stuffed with money and hands them out to Dommes without ever expecting an interaction. Someone once told me that he works hard but lives like a pauper because he gives all his salary away, not just to one Domme but to many. When I first met him I tried to interact with him but he backed off. All he wanted to do was give me the envelope and walk away. I gave him the opened envelope back because shit like that makes me feel very uncomfortable. I didn't think he was a loser as McCullen suggests but someone who desperately needed mental health professionals....I guess he's the nearest thing I will ever meet in the flesh to a 'pay pig'.

Saying that, I don't think all PP's are gullible or in need of psychiatric help. Many fin Dommes do entertain their pay pigs even if it is only online. Whilst a run of the mill guy may sometimes get off or even addicted to personal porn interactions for which they pay good money for, some submissive men will get the same thrill and sense of belonging from online domination even if it does come at a price. Whilst it may not appear to be sexual, its a bit like chastity and I firmly believe that chastity is a very sexual to the person being put in it.

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ORIGINAL: cloudboy

I thought you hated this subject!

You can sweep anything under the umbrella of "TPE." For instance cleaning a floor is not a fetish.....

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ORIGINAL: WinsomeDefiance

You're an intelligent man, RS and I get where you are cming from. One thing though. I don't consider anything we do, that falls under a BDSM - D/s - M/s umbrella to BE any form of paraphilia "unless those activities

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cause clinically significant distress or impairment in social, occupational, or other important areas of functing."

ion

Keeping that in mind, a money-pig who can't pay his/her bills because of a need to send his/her income to a fin domme falls more into the category of a paraphillia than someone who likes to get their freak on, but in a way that doesn't harm/impact their every day life. As I understand it engaging in sado/maochistic practices, is not in and of itself diagnosable as being sexually dysfunctional. The reference in the DSM is about Paraphilia being diagnosed if it causes problems in the every day aspects of your life. If you have impaired functioning day to day, because of your sado/masochism, then it might be diagnosable as a paraphilia.

The actual criteria for a diagnosisis is if one acts on their obsessions with a 'non consenting invidual' (sadism) or The fantasies, sexual urges, or behaviors cause clinically significant distress or impairment in social, occupational, or other important areas of functioning (masochism). And of course, that these problems have occured over a period of more than 6 months.

I am NOT advocating FOR money-pigs or findommes - I haven't met one in real life either. Hell, for that matter, I haven't dealt with any online either as it isn't my thing. I just felt compelled to point out that I don't know if what you are doing is diagnosable as a paraphilia or not but defining what we do AS a paraphilia does not sit well with me.

Much love, and respect and apologies for disagreeing with you

WinD

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ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist

Coming here and complaining about something I didn’t say won't change the reality of the question I asked. I specifically said exchanging money doesn’t bother me and cited how proDommes receive money for a service definable as a fetish by the DSM.

I am sincere in exploring the validity of the fetish aspect for this growing phenomenon, I am not bashing pay piggies or FinDommes, I am saying that it isn’t BDSM. I am asking for someone with the capacity to explain it in valid terms like all other fetishes are.

I love that MariaB told a story about some submissive guy giving away envelopes of money to unfamiliar Dommes in real life. That is tangible.

But I do beg your forgiveness for my own err. It has occurred to me while rereading my posts I used the term "Finnies". I have never heard a pay piggy or FinDomme use that reference, so that was rude and disrespectful. My bad and my apologies. It biased the ambiance of my post and did not hold to my high minded intent. Upon further reading it also occurred to me I have been misspelling. I think it should be:
FinDommery as feminine
FinDomry as masculine

I thank you all for being so civil in this potentially volatile thread and gracing us with your replies, treating this topic with respect and sincerity. And I politely ask, if fetishes aren't to be defined by psychologists, who then determines what a fetish is, a plumber?

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ORIGINAL: ExiledTyrant

Before psychologists it was medicine men.

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ORIGINAL: MariaB

RS...The PP I was talking about puts £10 in an envelope but keep in mind, there are probably over two hundred Dommes in that club and he has a sack full of envelopes.


The main similarity between a pro and a fin is, they both get material gain from doing what they do. The fin Domme has to work a lot harder in the office and the pro Domme has to work harder in the shop. The fin Domme has to get used to constant rejection, the pro Domme has to wait for the contacts to fall into her lap. The pro Domme tends to look at her set up as business, a fin Domme (at least they tell us this) do it purely for their own pleasure.

Now its the pleasure bit I don’t get because if I had to copy and paste hundreds of introductory letters into a potentially uninterested mail list, (the only qualifying criteria is they are male submissives) then I would expect, at best, a 1% return but I would also expect a fairly large amount of hate mail back in my in box. Why would I put myself through tedious and possibly depressing task if I really felt I was a Goddess who deserved to be worshipped?

I’m sure that amongst the thousands of fin Dommes we have on the internet, a number of them really do have this as a fetish/kink but I believe its only a small number and that most have just jumped on the money making band wagon. The fin Dommes who bother to invest in an all singing all dancing website and who gives a submissive male genuine attention in return for that money/gift, are the genuine fin Dommes amongst us and because submissive men find them rather than the other way round, their worth/value remains intact and can therefore be a turn on.

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ORIGINAL: ThePrincessKali

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ORIGINAL: MariaB

RS...The PP I was talking about puts £10 in an envelope but keep in mind, there are probably over two hundred Dommes in that club and he has a sack full of envelopes.


The main similarity between a pro and a fin is, they both get material gain from doing what they do. The fin Domme has to work a lot harder in the office and the pro Domme has to work harder in the shop. The fin Domme has to get used to constant rejection, the pro Domme has to wait for the contacts to fall into her lap. The pro Domme tends to look at her set up as business, a fin Domme (at least they tell us this) do it purely for their own pleasure.

Now its the pleasure bit I don’t get because if I had to copy and paste hundreds of introductory letters into a potentially uninterested mail list, (the only qualifying criteria is they are male submissives) then I would expect, at best, a 1% return but I would also expect a fairly large amount of hate mail back in my in box. Why would I put myself through tedious and possibly depressing task if I really felt I was a Goddess who deserved to be worshipped?

I’m sure that amongst the thousands of fin Dommes we have on the internet, a number of them really do have this as a fetish/kink but I believe its only a small number and that most have just jumped on the money making band wagon. The fin Dommes who bother to invest in an all singing all dancing website and who gives a submissive male genuine attention in return for that money/gift, are the genuine fin Dommes amongst us and because submissive men find them rather than the other way round, their worth/value remains intact and can therefore be a turn on.

I'm a Fin Domme and I've been on this site for a few years now. I almost never send out the first message to potential submissives. I've maybe done it a dozen or so times since I've been on here and it was because their profile very specifically said they were seeking the same thing as me. I wrote an individual letter to them, not a copy and paste one. But 99.9% of the time they come to us. Maybe there are girls sending out thousands of copy/paste letters to every single submissibe man on this site but If they are its news to me. I've talked to many other Fin Dommes who have said the same. I do, however, get hundreds of copy/paste messages from men asking me if I'll look at their embarrassing photos or something. So I suppose it goes both ways.

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ORIGINAL: NookieNotes

I guess I don't see why it matters. If people want to do it, then they should be allowed to do it. Not necessarily on this site, if the rules are against it, but I don't see a point in railing against it. What others do in their personal lives and their decisions are not my concern.

That they are free to make those decisions (however harmful they may be) is.

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ORIGINAL: NookieNotes

I guess I don't see why it matters. If people want to do it, then they should be allowed to do it. Not necessarily on this site, if the rules are against it, but I don't see a point in railing against it. What others do in their personal lives and their decisions are not my concern.