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chastity - 7/10/2015 1:32:22 PM

sissy1krissy

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Hi everyone,

I am new to this site and am pretty interested in being locked in chastity to finally become a true sissy. i was just wondering how that dynamic typically happens and why it is so difficult to find someone who will hold the keys. Are there maintenance things to worry about?

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RE: chastity - 7/10/2015 1:44:26 PM

JVoV

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Chastity is a very selfish concern for a submissive. Making it a priority shows no focus on actually serving a Dominant.

(in reply to sissy1krissy)

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RE: chastity - 7/10/2015 1:45:53 PM

UllrsIshtar

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quote:

ORIGINAL: sissy1krissy

i was just wondering how that dynamic typically happens and why it is so difficult to find someone who will hold the keys.

Because most people's experience is that when the desire for chastity is initiated by the male sub, it's just not worth it for the key holder, because they tend to become relegated to living fetish delivery devices rather than people having a fulfilling mutually beneficial interpersonal relationship with another human being.

Not saying you're like that, but that IS the stigma you'll be up against trying to convince somebody to take an interest.

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RE: chastity - 7/10/2015 1:49:54 PM

JVoV

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Right. Kinda like trusting a neighbor or relative with your spare house key. You expect them to be at your beck and call as you need them, but you don't want them making themselves at home while you're at work.

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RE: chastity - 7/10/2015 8:19:35 PM

peppermint

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The problem with being centered on chastity is that the relationship is all about you. Many Dominants prefer that the core of the relationship be all about the dominant and what the dominant wants and needs. You are basically looking for a Dominant who will please you and your kinks.

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RE: chastity - 7/13/2015 6:16:08 AM

NookieNotes

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I enjoy boys who want orgasm control. I do not enjoy boys who want to dictate how that orgasm control happens, or who want me to keep extending the time period, or who feel like they have to be locked up...

Because, as you have already read, that's not making it MY control. It's using me as a joystick controller for your own game of kink.

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RE: chastity - 7/13/2015 11:12:40 AM

RockaRolla

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We don't have a D/s dynamic and he's the furthest thing from a sissy. But during our trial run at chastity it still felt like a kink in which he had full control. We hadn't committed to using devices and I was testing his ability to abstain on his own, and while he did good with that it was completely up to him.

Nothing wrong with chastity on its own, but from my view it'd be more for you than your partner. And that's okay, but I'd advise against trying to incorporate it into your partner's toolbox of kinks and pass it off as another way for her to control you.

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RE: chastity - 7/13/2015 3:12:39 PM

sissy1krissy

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Thanks for the input everyone! I think I just have to keep looking and maybe find someone where there is a mutual interest in that and become better at submitting.

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RE: chastity - 7/13/2015 3:22:43 PM

UllrsIshtar

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quote:

ORIGINAL: sissy1krissy

Thanks for the input everyone! I think I just have to keep looking and maybe find someone where there is a mutual interest in that and become better at submitting.

That's a fine idea, but keep in mind that most D-types are only interested in chastity when they're the one driving it, and 'force' it on somebody who doesn't necessarily want it. By saying that you want it, you're taking away part of the feeling of control, which is what most keyholders relish in.

That's not to say that you shouldn't communicate that this is something you're interested in, but you are probably going to do a lot better finding somebody who is as well if it's only part of a broad range of interests you share (both vanilla and kinky) instead of being the main thing you're looking for.

_____________________________

I can be your whore
I am the dirt you created
I am your sinner
And your whore
But let me tell you something baby
You love me for everything you hate me for

(in reply to sissy1krissy)

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RE: chastity - 12/21/2015 5:43:44 PM

domseekingsubnow

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I disagree with many of the responses. When someone offers me to hold the keys they are not asking for a mailbox services. They are asking me to become the person who decides when the sub is getting release, if any. That gives me a lot of extra power in the relationship. Yes, the guy may be a committed sub, but two weeks caged later he is not just committed, he is going crazy and will not hesitate at any chance I gave him for release. Travel to the other side of town for a quick 15 minutes session to help me relax after a stressful day at work? Hell yes, he'll be there and will left happier than ever.

The guy is not being selfish, for Christ shake. The guy is quite literally handing you ownership of his cock, and by extension his ass. Anyway, my two cents.

< Message edited by domseekingsubnow -- 12/21/2015 5:51:11 PM >

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