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Messaging question - 11/8/2015 8:22:04 AM   
Vinax385


Posts: 9
Joined: 10/23/2015
Status: offline 		So ive been on here for a few weeks but ive been on other datting sites before, and i never seem to have much luck when messaging though that being said i understand that my first message is the key to a conversation. So my question is when i messaging someone what should i put into that first contact message to increase my chances of getting a reply.
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Messaging question - 11/8/2015 8:29:04 AM   
masmiss


Posts: 494
Joined: 2/16/2009
From: New Jersey
Status: offline 		I suggest you start a normal, non-kink conversation. Read the profile, then ask questions relevant to what is written.

Your profile is well-written and that's a good start.

Good luck to you!

_____________________________

I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.

-William Ernest Henley

(in reply to Vinax385)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Messaging question - 11/8/2015 8:55:02 AM   
Vinax385


Posts: 9
Joined: 10/23/2015
Status: offline 		Well thank you. I figured my profile was kind of bland. So thats a bonus

(in reply to masmiss)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Messaging question - 11/8/2015 9:33:49 AM   
Bhruic


Posts: 985
Joined: 4/11/2012
From: Toronto, Canada
Status: offline 		Proper spelling, punctuation and grammar doesn't hurt either. Badly written messages invite the reader to assume you are stupid.

_____________________________

pronounced "VROOick"

(in reply to Vinax385)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Messaging question - 11/8/2015 9:49:02 AM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14414
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline 		1) Be a normal human being. If you wouldn't walk up to a woman on the street and ask her those questions, they don't belong in your first email.

2) Just because this is D/s BDSM doesn't mean that manners, morals or sense of propriety should go out the window. There's plenty of time to get kinky later.

3) No dicks pics....ever.

4) She is not your submissive until she agrees to be your submissive. So, making demands and expecting honorifics would be a no-no.

5) Be specific about what you're looking for in a partner. Emails that read, "Hi, I'm looking for a submissive female to serve me" end up deleted by most women.

6) and lastly....as Bhruic said - Check your grammar, spelling and punctuation. Write in complete sentences. This is a written medium, this is your advertisement and you have a lot of competition. The first impression that you make has a big impact.

Good luck in your search.

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to Bhruic)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Messaging question - 11/8/2015 9:56:01 AM   
Vinax385


Posts: 9
Joined: 10/23/2015
Status: offline 		Thank you all so much ive been learning so much since i have started reading and posting on the forums

(in reply to OsideGirl)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Messaging question - 11/8/2015 11:09:22 AM   
WickedsDesire


Posts: 9362
Joined: 11/4/2015
Status: offline 		What’s wrong with the classics
Kneel bitch and suck my two incher I round up to the nearest two.
Hi babe doll hun
I wish to stretch your cavities with my cock and thrash you with pots and pans for I am master.
This is you mater slave I shall devoid you of all your worldly possessions…but before I grace you with my magnificence send us a titty picture so I can spank one out with fury as my partners slumbers..at work..giving birth etc

Shag all picture and profile – then your message must be good
Plenty of handsome pictures and a marvellous profile you can send any olde rot.

actually ladies what are the classics these days?

(in reply to Vinax385)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Messaging question - 11/8/2015 11:27:06 AM   
freedomdwarf1


Posts: 6845
Joined: 10/23/2012
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: WickedsDesire
What’s wrong with the classics

I'm guessing with the drivel that follows that this is a question rather than a statement?

The problem with your 'classics' is.... they are tired, worn out, over-used, lame, insipid, insulting, condescending, idiotic, patronizing, unflattering..... yada, yada, yada.


quote:

ORIGINAL: WickedsDesire
actually ladies what are the classics these days?

Treat them like equal human individuals first and foremost.


_____________________________

“If liberty means anything at all, it means the right to tell people what they do not want to hear.”
George Orwell, 1903-1950


(in reply to WickedsDesire)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Messaging question - 11/8/2015 3:02:19 PM   
FelineRanger


Posts: 658
Joined: 9/4/2012
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: WickedsDesire

What’s wrong with the classics
Kneel bitch and suck my two incher I round up to the nearest two.
Hi babe doll hun
I wish to stretch your cavities with my cock and thrash you with pots and pans for I am master.
This is you mater slave I shall devoid you of all your worldly possessions…but before I grace you with my magnificence send us a titty picture so I can spank one out with fury as my partners slumbers..at work..giving birth etc


Okay, who ratted me out? Who told you all my great openings?

_____________________________

Bill

(in reply to WickedsDesire)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Messaging question - 11/9/2015 11:31:25 AM   
sweetieDA


Posts: 129
Joined: 4/3/2015
Status: offline 		Comment on one thing in their profile, say why it interested you and ask a question. That way, they know you read their profile, they understand why you're attracted and the question gives them something to respond to. However, it's not overly long in case they check your profile and are not interested, you haven't taken too much time on it.

Save the big long emails for later on, when you know there's a connection. It can be demoralising to write a long message and not get a reply back.

(in reply to Vinax385)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Messaging question - 11/9/2015 11:53:46 AM   
Kana


Posts: 6674
Joined: 10/24/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Vinax385

So ive been on here for a few weeks but ive been on other datting sites before, and i never seem to have much luck when messaging though that being said i understand that my first message is the key to a conversation. So my question is when i messaging someone what should i put into that first contact message to increase my chances of getting a reply.

Number one-spellcheck is your BFF. Seriously.
Send me a message written/punctuated like the one above and I delete on impact and I'm a fucking guy-it ain't like my email box is exploding with activity.

_____________________________

"One of God's own prototypes. A high-powered mutant of some kind never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die. "
HST

(in reply to Vinax385)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Messaging question - 11/9/2015 12:35:59 PM   
Spiritedsub2


Posts: 3315
Joined: 7/18/2012
Status: offline 		I was going to tell him that too, but thought better of it. If he is almost illiterate, or so lazy that he writes ignoring the basics of simple grammar (witness his profile) then it's best for his message recipients and profile viewers to know that about him early on.

Edit: I like that phrase "delete on impact"

Edit again: I guess that's how I feel about ALL of the "how can I come off differently than how I do" questions.

< Message edited by Spiritedsub2 -- 11/9/2015 12:39:04 PM >

_____________________________

Don’t grieve. Anything you lose comes round in another form.
~ Rumi

Laughing Dolphin

(in reply to Kana)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Messaging question - 11/15/2015 9:41:14 AM   
WickedsDesire


Posts: 9362
Joined: 11/4/2015
Status: offline 		freedomdwarf1 Put words into my mouth when they belong there, muffins any time.

Answer for those who do not understand nuances.

Op write a profile and get mailing and avoid the deranged stereotypical classical mails (truly what are they these days?)...what a boring yet factually accurate reply that was/is.

Personally I don’t care who spell checks or not. Too ill to coordinate correctly and waste half an hour doing so to the detriment of eg health, or typing whilst under the influence of huffing ether.

But write a couple of paragraphs if you can afford a picture do so.
If you are man..yes you will be you’ve had no mail do not expect even one after a year here – less you whip up a good profile and pictures. I am afraid you will need to get mailing and avoid scammers and hot fake Lesbos etc

(in reply to Spiritedsub2)
Profile   Post #: 13
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