RE: From Dom to Master.... (Full Version)

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SusanofO -> RE: From Dom to Master.... (7/18/2006 9:44:21 PM)

You are lucky, julia. Sinergy is smart, and has a great sense of humor. He is just as lucky, too, to have you. You two are probably so sweet looking together in public. Congratulations!

- Susan



juliaoceania -> RE: From Dom to Master.... (7/18/2006 9:44:51 PM)

Yes, take my dynamic now.. I call him Daddy, even though we do not role play this as in age play. It is a dynamic, not a role play, although some people roleplay it too.

On Edit, thanks for the congrats susan and i wanted to add congrats to cuddleheart on her new situation.



SusanofO -> RE: From Dom to Master.... (7/18/2006 9:56:52 PM)

You're welcome, julia. Congrats to cuddleheart, too!!

I kind of like the Daddy idea, although I am not sure I would be involved in age play at all,  perhaps a bit (it woud depend on, when the time comes, what the other person wanted. I am very, very flexible (really).

But I like the idea of a big, protective Daddy figure, so it might be a name, but really have a nurturing quality to it and much more than that, but I am okay with no Daddy, too. Gosh I feel screwed up right now - I need to take a paper and pencil and figure out what the hell I am doing. Really. I know that sounds negative and these things take time, but I need to do it. I am flexible, but - .Soon (like this week, maybe). Thanks for listening, I am not trying to hi-jack the thread. Back to your regular stations...

- Susan 



Lordandmaster -> RE: From Dom to Master.... (7/18/2006 11:04:12 PM)

At the same moment that you go from his sub to his slave.

quote:

ORIGINAL: cuddleheart50

When does your Dom become your Master?



cuddleheart50 -> RE: From Dom to Master.... (7/19/2006 3:07:42 AM)

Thanks everyone, I really appreciate all of the answers.



RavenMuse -> RE: From Dom to Master.... (7/19/2006 4:26:51 AM)

OK sweetie, you've done it now haven't you! One of the perenial subjective questions![:D]

If you ask any six people in WIITWD you are likely to get seven answers, all diffrent.

Here however is mine.

I meet an s type at a play club who begs me to take a flogger to her back. I do so, we play, she goes on her way and I neither know nor care where. For that encounter I am a Top

I meet her a few more times at various events, we chat, I start to care about who she is. She begins to submit to ME. We begin to meet more often, but I don't take up responcibility for the rest of her life, just for the time she spends with me. I am her Dom

That submission grows, we see each other more and more frequently, the care on both sides grows deeper, the trust begins to build. She begs for my collar. I take up the responcibility for ALL of her, warts an all, the good times, the bad times. The whole person. She has given me ALL of herself, I am her Master.




heartfeltsub -> RE: From Dom to Master.... (7/19/2006 5:05:25 AM)

Celeste posted something the other day, in another thread which i have not been able to locate yet about this transition from Dom to Master occurred for her. It was very good and may also help answer your question Cuddles. i will continue to look for it.

(editted to add the URL)
http://www.collarchat.com/m_480295/mpage_2/key_/tm.htm#481050
(that was Celeste's post)



Roisseynpromise -> RE: From Dom to Master.... (7/19/2006 5:46:14 AM)

I totally agree that nowadays it is up to the individuals involved. however, I feel obliged to point out that 25-30  years ago, before there was an internet, the term Master implied an extensive period of training and learning as an apprentice from other Masters. It was far more formal  than today. it was more likened to a fraternal order or a guild. History lesson adjourned.



Tamerofwild1s -> RE: From Dom to Master.... (7/19/2006 6:10:13 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: cuddleheart50

When does your Dom become your Master?  Please be serious guys, I wanna know.  Thanks.  [:D]


I hope this answer helps you cuddles as it's the best I could come up with .... for a multitude of years I possesed Dominant traits .. then I learned what they meant and became a Dom .. soon after that I gained my first submissive . she gave everything she was too me ... and refered to herself as a slave .. with in a few weeks she called me Master .... so I think in all honesty when the Dom is called Master by his slave thats when he is truely a Master ... I call myself Master now a days because thats what I am ..



hisforever -> RE: From Dom to Master.... (7/19/2006 6:21:08 AM)

congrats!  I believe that when you give all of yourself to him, completely, and the moment comes when you realize that is what he is, then you are his slave and He is your Master.



BillsGalSusan -> RE: From Dom to Master.... (7/19/2006 7:29:55 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: RavenMuse
I meet an s type at a play club ...<big snip>...She has given me ALL of herself, I am her Master.

That's a lovely answer, RavenMuse, and, in the ways that count (at least IMO), a good fit for my experience after 30+ years  living with the same Domly guy in a relationship that would be called M/s by those who use that frame of reference/language. This despite the fact that we have never been to a scene event or played (casually or otherwise) with anyone else.

It's interesting, to me, how culturally specific all of this is. One of my challenges, as I tentatively explore participating in this BBS community, is to look for commonalities even though my/our language and frame of reference are so different from most of the people (future friends, I hope) posting here.

Another Susan



RavenMuse -> RE: From Dom to Master.... (7/19/2006 7:54:16 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: BillsGalSusan
That's a lovely answer, RavenMuse, and, in the ways that count (at least IMO), a good fit for my experience after 30+ years  living with the same Domly guy in a relationship that would be called M/s by those who use that frame of reference/language. This despite the fact that we have never been to a scene event or played (casually or otherwise) with anyone else.


Thank you dear and welcome to the forums.
I presented it as one evolving relationship, but of course most don't follow that route. I was mearly using it to outline the diffrences in where *I* percieve Top/Dom/Master. Like with helen, we went straight to M/s as she gave and I accepted responcibility for ALL of her when we both recognised the potential and the way the dynamic was running.

quote:

It's interesting, to me, how culturally specific all of this is. One of my challenges, as I tentatively explore participating in this BBS community, is to look for commonalities even though my/our language and frame of reference are so different from most of the people (future friends, I hope) posting here.


I find a few cultural diffrences but not so many that we can't understand each other, mostly when law or outside societal perceptions are concerned I have to remind myself that most here are on the other side of the pond, but the majority of core issues with D/s relationships are all the same.



Bearlee -> RE: From Dom to Master.... (7/19/2006 8:04:11 AM)

I agree with what many of you are saying...but what about the newbie-T/D/M?  While a new couple in this lifestyle may be so devoted to one another as to call each other slave & Master; but CAN a 'newbie' be a master of anything? 
 
Surely what Roissey said holds some water, no? 
 
curious,
beverly



MrrPete -> RE: From Dom to Master.... (7/19/2006 8:10:00 AM)

For me: I will not allow  a woman to call me Master until she
wears my collar. Then she has permission and the right to call me
Master but it is one thing I will not demand.



RavenMuse -> RE: From Dom to Master.... (7/19/2006 8:22:45 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Bearlee

I agree with what many of you are saying...but what about the newbie-T/D/M?  While a new couple in this lifestyle may be so devoted to one another as to call each other slave & Master; but CAN a 'newbie' be a master of anything? 
 
Surely what Roissey said holds some water, no?  


To me whilst the Old guard approach holds some merit, especialy when it comes to BDSM skills, it isn't much use (IMO) in D/s.

Either the person is in control of themself and handles responcibilitys of being a Master appropriatly or they don't. Much of that is set early on but it can only be learned and improved on by life experience, not from being taught by another (Advice is helpful but useless unless the person works on themself).

I collared my first girl when I was 15, even from my perspective today I would have acknowledged that young man as a fellow Master. I took my responcibilitys seriously and to the best of my ability.... not as skillfully as I do now some quarter of a centuary later but just as diligently. Age and experience does matter, but not to the extent of writting the young off.... Most of Dominance or submission comes from the persons nature, as we get older we simply get more skillful at experessing and acting on it.



BillsGalSusan -> RE: From Dom to Master.... (7/19/2006 9:00:48 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: RavenMuse

I find a few cultural diffrences but not so many that we can't understand each other, mostly when law or outside societal perceptions are concerned I have to remind myself that most here are on the other side of the pond, but the majority of core issues with D/s relationships are all the same.



I didn't really have national differences in mind when I spoke about culture. I was thinking more about the traditions and common language that have developed within the organized  (or semi-organized) groups of people on-line and in the meatworld who are drawn to each other because of  common interests having to do with power relationships and sexuality.

Thank you for the kind welcome, RavenMuse.

--Another Susan  



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