|
TimeLimited -> RE: When is it the right time for the slave to actually join you? (2/25/2016 10:44:31 PM)
|
I read your question as requesting you to think with your head and not your emotions. Good for you both.
I have played with a third while in a D/s relationship. I am not an owner. I have had a sub who lived in her own home and was a single Mom. We never advanced to 24/7 because of the kids. I did spend time in her home often as her DOM. We did attend local and national BDSM events at times. I still believe most of what I add to the conversation is important.
EACH of the three of you may have separate wants needs desires expectations LIMITS.
EACH needs to sit by their lonesome and think about that. Have the dynamics been discussed by all? Then sit down and discuss them with each other without the heat of the moment ruling.
Have you separately spent time with the sub/slave candidate in play? IF not, that needs to happen to help set some more expectations and limits not often thought of until sub is in the home. Nobody needs a nasty surprise when you pass an unspoken limit .... or more often you go somewhere not discussed and sub/slave balks. Now What?
While my sub was very much into the gals, her jealousy was aroused when I spent time with the third and in her mind deprived her of my time. That despite discussion up front.
Oldest rule in the book: The thing not asked nor discussed will bite you harshly. OJT will happen.
One of the oldest rule in medicine is First Do No Harm
The second one that bites most is what did the medic not ask. (Personal experience as the patient).
Have a thought in mind if/when SNAFU bites you in the butt. Murphy always is around the next bend.
While I wish you the very best, I strongly urge some trial events in the relationship before bringing the sub/slave into the home. I know someone who even had a background check on the sub candidate only to learn a scam history in her record. Needless to say that cooled that.
|
|
|
|
