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Mistresses/dominatrixs - How do you do about finding cl... - 8/10/2016 4:01:20 AM

AFaceSeatCushion

Posts: 7
Joined: 8/10/2016
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Hello all, this is probably a very random question, but how do you ladies go about finding your market? I'm curious seeing as with the volume of dudes (like me) overflooding the limited amount of openly dominant women I'd think that using sites like this would be useless due to the sheer volume of messages you'd recieve of potential clients that may never pan out. Of course I could be completely wrong about this, lol. Is it just one of those cases where you usually just have to be lucky and happen upon hearing about a mistress in chance discussions?

I have a hard time finding doms around here seeing as I'm from Iowa. I should make clear that I'm like most people in the market, not actually full time submissive, rather looking to hire out a dom for the experience of domination. Obviously, legal fetishes are in mind. In my case I'm looking for facesitting and objectification, which is legal here so long as it is clothed. I've only ever been able to find one lady near my area, but it just seems like there should be more out there.

So I guess a second question for you wonderful ladies, is do you think that some of the market is just "underground" (lol, that sounds so cliché) or if aomply theres just not women out there doing it that often?

Thanks for your time!

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RE: Mistresses/dominatrixs - How do you do about findin... - 8/10/2016 4:25:58 AM

AFaceSeatCushion

Posts: 7
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I should also add on to this that if you check my profile yes, I know its blank. I dont really see anything panning out from this site to push me to go through with that , but it seems like it had a active (even if spamhappy, lol) discussion board. I didn't mean this as to try to advertise myself (along with this isn't the forum to post that stuff), just wanted to get peoples inputs on this topic. Thanks again!

< Message edited by AFaceSeatCushion -- 8/10/2016 4:30:53 AM >

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RE: Mistresses/dominatrixs - How do you do about findin... - 8/10/2016 5:56:56 AM

freedomdwarf1

Posts: 6845
Joined: 10/23/2012
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For one, why should they let you in on their secrets on how they run their business??

And secondly, an empty hook catches no fish.
So perhaps you should flesh out your profile.

As someone who is actively seeking, I instantly skip all empty profiles.
Why do I do that??
Quite simply, if you can't be assed to tell me something about yourself and some idea of what you seek, I can't be assed to ask. It's as simple as that.

You reap what you sow.

_____________________________

“If liberty means anything at all, it means the right to tell people what they do not want to hear.”

George Orwell, 1903-1950

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RE: Mistresses/dominatrixs - How do you do about findin... - 8/10/2016 9:41:38 AM

OsideGirl

Posts: 14415
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I think you're confusing two different things: a Pro Domme and a Domme. This site, while there are Pros on it, is geared more towards personal ads. You may have better luck on sites that focus on paid services or in the back of your local alternative newspaper.

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RE: Mistresses/dominatrixs - How do you do about findin... - 8/10/2016 9:54:47 AM

Gauge

Posts: 5689
Joined: 6/17/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: AFaceSeatCushion

I should also add on to this that if you check my profile yes, I know its blank. I dont really see anything panning out from this site to push me to go through with that , but it seems like it had a active (even if spamhappy, lol) discussion board. I didn't mean this as to try to advertise myself (along with this isn't the forum to post that stuff), just wanted to get peoples inputs on this topic. Thanks again!

A blank profile says nothing, but speaks volumes about you. If you felt compelled enough to post on the boards here, then I would think you could take the time to fill out your profile. You never know what is out there. Use caution to be certain.

Also, I would look into your local scene for munches etc.

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RE: Mistresses/dominatrixs - How do you do about findin... - 8/10/2016 10:50:33 AM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: AFaceSeatCushion
Hello all, this is probably a very random question, but how do you ladies go about finding your market? I'm curious seeing as with the volume of dudes (like me) overflooding the limited amount of openly dominant women I'd think that using sites like this would be useless due to the sheer volume of messages you'd recieve of potential clients that may never pan out. Of course I could be completely wrong about this, lol. Is it just one of those cases where you usually just have to be lucky and happen upon hearing about a mistress in chance discussions?

I have a hard time finding doms around here seeing as I'm from Iowa. I should make clear that I'm like most people in the market, not actually full time submissive, rather looking to hire out a dom for the experience of domination. Obviously, legal fetishes are in mind. In my case I'm looking for facesitting and objectification, which is legal here so long as it is clothed. I've only ever been able to find one lady near my area, but it just seems like there should be more out there.

So I guess a second question for you wonderful ladies, is do you think that some of the market is just "underground" (lol, that sounds so cliché) or if aomply theres just not women out there doing it that often?

Thanks for your time!

Iowa? That's tough, man.

The only place that I've ever lived that could out-do that was Alaska. If there's a decent pro-domme in the entire state, I wanna know. I lived there for three years and no female could throw a whip better than I could.

Your second question about 'the market'. I'm not a pro-domme and I find most pay for play distasteful. However, most of the 'market' is flooded on both sides. If you want to find some gal who looks good in a pair of yoga pants, I'm sure you could. There are tons of gals out there who look good in photo shoots, chick with a whip class. Stand and model types. Depends on the experience you want.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

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RE: Mistresses/dominatrixs - How do you do about findin... - 8/11/2016 1:38:43 AM

AFaceSeatCushion

Posts: 7
Joined: 8/10/2016
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quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

I think you're confusing two different things: a Pro Domme and a Domme. This site, while there are Pros on it, is geared more towards personal ads. You may have better luck on sites that focus on paid services or in the back of your local alternative newspaper.

Thanks for the constructive reply! Yes, what I am asking about is the "Pro Domme" I guess. I think confusion happens on this site between Dommes and potential subs since there seems to be two major classes, which I call lifestyle domination and kink domination, but we're all in the same pot together. People like me who arent really submissive in real life but like the experience in short template probably don't mesh perfectly with people who live and breath it. Thanks! I never thought to see if we have an online alternative newspaper around here, I'll have to check that out!

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RE: Mistresses/dominatrixs - How do you do about findin... - 8/11/2016 1:43:38 AM

AFaceSeatCushion

Posts: 7
Joined: 8/10/2016
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Gauge

A blank profile says nothing, but speaks volumes about you. If you felt compelled enough to post on the boards here, then I would think you could take the time to fill out your profile. You never know what is out there. Use caution to be certain.

Also, I would look into your local scene for munches etc.

Thanks for the reply, I'm actually not really here to advertise myself though on this site. This is simply curiosity sake on my part lol, like I said, collarspace seemed to have one of the better message boards is why I made a profile. Thanks for the suggestion though!

< Message edited by AFaceSeatCushion -- 8/11/2016 1:44:39 AM >

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RE: Mistresses/dominatrixs - How do you do about findin... - 8/11/2016 1:57:55 AM

AFaceSeatCushion

Posts: 7
Joined: 8/10/2016
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

Iowa? That's tough, man.

The only place that I've ever lived that could out-do that was Alaska. If there's a decent pro-domme in the entire state, I wanna know. I lived there for three years and no female could throw a whip better than I could.

Your second question about 'the market'. I'm not a pro-domme and I find most pay for play distasteful. However, most of the 'market' is flooded on both sides. If you want to find some gal who looks good in a pair of yoga pants, I'm sure you could. There are tons of gals out there who look good in photo shoots, chick with a whip class. Stand and model types. Depends on the experience you want.
[/color]

Thanks for the reply! Hey, the way they are making reality shows up there you coulda been a star as "The Domme of Alaska" lol. Yah, the part about a gal in yoga pants rings true lol. Like I said in a previous reply, I think that theres a lot of us here who definitely enjoy the experience, but maybe not the actual lifestyle 24/7. I understand for most established pro dommes that probably sucks to deal with as it means people who want to be clients who may not set up sessions as often as another person who really craves the lifestyle

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RE: Mistresses/dominatrixs - How do you do about findin... - 8/11/2016 2:57:02 AM

thishereboi

Posts: 14463
Joined: 6/19/2008
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The ones I knew put ads in the local paper. Here we have Metro Times, not sure what you have in Iowa. Good luck

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RE: Mistresses/dominatrixs - How do you do about findin... - 8/11/2016 4:20:48 AM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: AFaceSeatCushion
Thanks for the reply! Hey, the way they are making reality shows up there you coulda been a star as "The Domme of Alaska" lol. Yah, the part about a gal in yoga pants rings true lol. Like I said in a previous reply, I think that theres a lot of us here who definitely enjoy the experience, but maybe not the actual lifestyle 24/7. I understand for most established pro dommes that probably sucks to deal with as it means people who want to be clients who may not set up sessions as often as another person who really craves the lifestyle

Ha. To be honest, I never watched the reality shows made up there until after I moved away. As for kink on camera? No thanks. I lived up there when all of the swingers got busted. Uncle Sam seems to have a thing against certain activities happening on his turf.

That part aside, you're being too hard on yourself. Folks like you are one of the reasons that pros exist in the first place. At least you're honest about it. I wish more people who were really only interested in booking a session because they want to have fun with the experience would take after your example.

So, let's see if we can help you...

First off, you really don't want this site for this. You want a site called Fetlife. Now, they changed their sign up policy just a little bit ago where they are going to ask you for your cell phone number. You'll receive a text with an authentication code so you can create an account. Once you log in, you'll want to look for groups that are specifically for pro Domme networking. There are quite a few, so you're going to have to do a little research regarding your specific situation. Off of a quick check, I also found a munch group in your town. it's not terribly active but you could probably start a thread there asking if anyone is aware of anyone locally that does pay for play. They might know, they might not know, but it might give you a place to start.

When you are looking for the pro that suits your situation, do a few things to cover your own tail. You want to inquire about pricing, activities offered, scheduling, and you want to see some client reviews. You also want to find somebody who is going to be a good fit for you. Not all "pro" Dommes are the same.

A few other tips for you. Be honest about your experience level, or lack thereof. Be very straightforward about the kind of session you have in mind. Don't come across as some guy who is just looking for wank fodder and don't be a time waster. You don't need ten hours of reassurance to book a one hour session. Keep in mind that you are applying for an appointment, not the other way around. Just like not all pros fit the client, not every client fits the pro.

There are some current and former pros here on the forums that will probably have additional tips for you. If they don't add to the thread, hopefully, at least I've given you a place to start.

I want to wish you good luck with your experience.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

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